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Spencer's POV
Aiden and Ashley haven't stopped glaring at each other since they woke up. I was excited Aiden left after last night. It gave Ashley and I time to connect. It was the first night in weeks I slept the whole time. I'm confused though, she keeps playing games one moment it's us then it's not. She asks like she loves me then she turns cold. I don't know what going on and its tearing me apart. They are looking at each other over there mugs but there glances break once I notice them then they both look at me. I feel like they are waiting for me to crazy again. It's hard to breath with them observing every pulse I have.
I begin to get up and they both stand with me I giggle and sit back down. "You guys.. I'm fine." I say watching them sit. I look at both of them and shrug. I take Ashley's paper sitting in front of her and roll my eyes once she whines when she realizes I have it.
"So Spence.. I don't know if you're up for it but Ashley is performing tonight if you want to come.." Aiden said smiling at me. His eyes looked between us and I looked at Ashley.
"You didn't tell me that." I said looking at her.
"You were going through a hard time. I didn't want to push you to go out if you didn't want to." Ashley said smiling gently. AWW.
"Let's go." I said smiling. "When is it?" I Asked looking at the clock strike noon.
"It's soon." Ashley's voice dragged on..
"How soon?"
"About two. I perform at the beach a couple slow songs a couple fast. Whatever the crowd wants." Ashley said non-chalantly.
"Ash! It's spring break! You're performing for the college kids?!" I said excitedly spitting out my coffee.
Ashley and Aiden began cracking up making an explosion of air escape my lungs. I felt my body shake with laughter. It felt good to be happy again. It fell silent when we all looked at each other. There was so much tension at this table it was almost unbearable Aiden and I both were staring at Ashley desiring something and I was hoping it wasn't the same thing.
"So I'm going to change." Ashley smiled fakely and ran to her room leaving Aiden and I to stare after her. I didn't stop looking at her direction til Aiden called my name.
"Yeah." I said turning back.
"You going to go change?" He smiled.
"Yeah. What are you wearing?" I asked.
"Kaki shorts and a white polo or something like that. You?" HE asked.
I smiled " Not sure yet. I haven't been to a beach performance since college." I said thinking back.
"How when you got shit-faced and thought the girl next to you was your mother so you kept apologizing for your terrible behavior." Aiden chuckled.
I covered my face in terror at the memory.
"Please don't remind me of my worst moment.
"I can think of worst things you could do than get wasted. Can you?" Aiden said leaning into the table. His voice turned cold glaring at me. I felt the sudden urge to run. I wanted to go duck and cover. I just smirked and looked back down at the paper. I felt it being ripped from my hands and I saw Aiden again. I went to take a nervous sip of coffee to have it be stripped from my hands.
"Spencer are you hiding something?" He asked smirking as if he knows. OH GOD! What if that was what him and Ashley were talking about.. What if he knows. Oh God. I felt my eyes narrow and get big. What if he told her to leave me alone?
"I'm going to get ready." I announced and walked to Ashley's room. She was in her bathroom turning off her shower. She had a towel wrapped around her. I walked in shut the door and pushed her to the wall.
"What did you say to Aiden?" I questioned looking at her fiercely.
"Nothing." She croaked nervously.
"Don't lie to me." I challenged.
"Spencer. I didn't fucking say anything. I'm not lying or anything. Don't act like I'm the reason you guys are fighting because I'm not. We aren't together so please keep me out of your relationship." Ashley spat back narrowing her eyes.
"Whatever. Stop acting like this Just admit you love me the way I love you Ashley.." I said trying to hold back the tears.
"I don't love you Spencer. I'm acting the way you need me too." She said slipping out of my fingers and walking out the door.
This happens every time we are alone we argue.. She leaves me more confused than the last. I start the shower up and strip quickly wanting to wash the day away. I breathe in the steam and hold in the hot smoke in me. I can feel the hot water run down my back and scold. I sit down in the middle and let the water surround me holding my legs. I wanted to cry but I couldn't I didn't have anything else to let out. I didn't jump when I felt her hands around my back. We were an incredible force to ignore. I could feel her get around me. She wrapped her legs around my waist and rubbed my thighs with her hands. Then dug her nails up my skin through my back and slowly kissed my spine. I moved my neck giving her more access. I moaned as her hands begin to find my breasts and nails began to turn me hot.
"If you can be quiet we can finish." Ashley whispered into my ear. I just nodded and let her spin me so my legs were slipped on top of hers.
"Can you do that for me?" She asked smiling wickedly. I nodded again feeling my legs begin to touch hers .
I jerked towards her.
"No Spencer." She smiled again letting the water drip on her lips making her lick them unconsciously.
"I need you." I begged.
"Oh. I know." She said leaning forward to kiss me and I closed my eyes wanting contact.
I could feel her hovering over me hesitating she wanted to … What was stopping her… I opened my eyes and noticed Ashley's shadow was no longer in the bathroom. I sighed at her absence.
I finished my shower and walked into Ashley's room rolling my eyes at her smirk.
"That wasn't nice." I said taking off the towel on my head and throwing it at her.
"I never said it was." She was sitting on her bed in short brushing her head and blow drying it straight.
"Too bad you left. I had a list of things I wanted to do." I mocked walking towards her closet. Ashley had been nice enough to let me wear her … live in her clothes since all mine had been burned to a crisp.
I grabbed jeans shorts and walked back to her room to see she was no longer there.
"Ash?" I questioned.
"Behind you." Ashley said into my ear making me shiver before walking out of her closet infront of me. She was playing with me.. Two can play this game . I pretended it didn't offend me as much as we both know it did but a girls gotta try.. I walked to her dark wooden dresser and pulled out a normal black bra dropped my towel and put it on shimming my breasts into it. I grabbed a matching black thong and slipped into it. I turned around to see Ashley observing my body. I smirked as her face turned realizing I had turned around.
I walked past her careful to barely touch her and grab the bottle of lotion she had in her hand. I lifted my leg on her desk by her closet door and slowly place the lotion on then switching lotion. I picked up the jean shorts and slid into them trying my best to make my breasts bounce up and down in Ashley's face. I walked by her again this time buttoning up the shorts to look for a shirt. I grabbed a white and grey tang top Obey shirt and slowly slid it on for Ashley's amusement. I could feel Ashley walk up behind me and grab the shirts front and pull it down over my neck and breasts groping both of them in her hands. I found myself grinding into her touch making her moan into my neck as she kissed it sweetly getting a rise out of me. DAMN it Spencer get the upper hand. I lost control feeling Ashley wrap my legs around her waist. She got on top of me once we hit her bed. Her mouth was on mine and I couldn't pull away. IF Ashley was taking advantage of me I didn't mind it at all. Her tongue swam with mine as our tongue locked together and sucked one another for power. Neither of us letting the moment pass. We wanted each other how bad we needed each other.
Ashley's hands refused to find my body only her mouth found contact. I grabbed her hands to force them on me to find her not wanting to.
"Ashley I need you to touch me." I said into her mouth. She shook her head.
"I can't it breaks the rules." Ashley murmured.
I pulled away.
"What rules?" I asked a little aggravated.
"That's against the rules to." She said smiling.
I somehow found it impossibly hard not to smile at the girl I was falling extremely hard for.
I touched her face and held it in place as I sat up.
"We need to get ready Ash." I said realizing the time. Ashley rolled her eyes as she climbed off of me to go back into her closet. When she walked out I tried not to drool. Ashley had on red shorts, black suspenders going over a red laced bra, white buttoned down shirt exposing her abs, a black hat and black combat boots that barely passed he ankles.
"You look.." I smiled unable to finish.
Ashley did her nose crinkling smile as she walked over and laid a peak on my mouth. We were interrupted by a knock.
"Hey girls. I don't mean to rush you on getting ready because you both always take forever but we have to leave in 15min." Aiden screamed through the door.
Ashley and I covered our mouths trying not to laugh.
"Alright!" We both mumbled.
After I blew dry my hair and applied a light natural makeup on we left. Ashley and I sat in her Porsche and Aiden said he had things to do before he met us there. The car ride was silent but it was comfortable. When we got there the beach was crowded with people. Ashley was popping her fingers I could tell she was nervous. She didn't pull away when I interlocked our fingers. I walked her to the fenced of area as the security guard stopped stopping us when she pulled out her tag. She gave my hand a squeeze and smiled.
"I think it might rain." Ashley said as the clouds began to sprinkle.
"It would rain on your parade." I smiled at her.
"Wherever you are in the crowd. I'll find you. Spencer I always will." She whispered into my ear before kissing it and walking backstage. It felt different and like it was a goodbye. I wanted to bolt after her and hold her tight but her words kept my feet in place.
"Ma'am I'm going to ask you to find a place out there." The muscle head told me as I turned on my heels and walked towards the crowd. I could feel the drops began to get harder and wetter but I was dumb to the pain the loneliness brought.
I watched as Ashley stood on stage and she smiled softly.
"How's everybody feeling!" She shouted and everyone screamed back. I found myself standing towards the back trying to walk through the front. She cleared her throat.
"So I have a little story before I start singing this.." Ashley announces and my throat drops.
The crowd goes silent for a moment and she smiles again making me nervous. The thunder crackled making the beach light up and Ashley jump a little but played it off cool.
"I am in this extremely complicated relationship. I mean it's complicated. I love this girl but I can't be with her. A lot of you probably don't care but I'm going to tell you anyway. From the moment I saw her I wanted her with every inch of me. I mean it was like an invisible force had pulled me towards her and I was falling hard. I honestly thought by now all my songs would be about heart break but there not. The first night we were together she fell asleep in my arms and whispered the most poetic thing before she drifted off. When she woke up she asked who fell asleep first and I said I didn't remember but I watched her sleep all night because I couldn't believe she was mine. So this is it for you." Ashley winked at me as the water began to turn her shirt see through and my core throb thinking of our first time. Ashley turned around and pointed to the band to start up. I could feel my heart bounce out of my chest.
Ashley took a deep breath and raced her fingers through her hair ringing out the water.
love I get so lost, sometimes
days pass and this emptiness fills my heart
when I want to run away
I drive off in my car
but whichever way I go
I come back to the place you are
all my instincts, they return
and the grand facade, so soon will burn
without a noise, without my pride
I reach out from the inside
in your eyes
the light the heat
in your eyes
I am complete
in your eyes
I see the doorway to a thousand churches
in your eyes
the resolution of all the fruitless searches
in your eyes
I see the light and the heat
in your eyes
oh, I want to be that complete
I want to touch the light
the heat I see in your eyes
love, I don't like to see so much pain
so much wasted and this moment keeps slipping away
I get so tired of working so hard for our survival
I look to the time with you to keep me awake and alive
and all my instincts, they return
and the grand facade, so soon will burn
without a noise, without my pride
I reach out from the inside
in your eyes
the light the heat
in your eyes
I am complete
in your eyes
I see the doorway to a thousand churches
in your eyes
the resolution of all the fruitless searches
in your eyes
I see the light and the heat
in your eyes
oh, I want to be that complete
I want to touch the light,
the heat I see in your eyes
in your eyes in your eyes
in your eyes in your eyes
in your eyes in your eyes
Ashley held onto the last note longer than I thought as the tears began to form in both of our eyes. I could feel her gaze on me the whole time. I walked closer to the stage and as she reached her hand out for me.
"I love you, Spencer" Ashley admitted as the crowd parted for us as the microphone boomed in my ear. Ashley jumped off the stage and everyone hollered, whistled and screamed.
"Kiss her!" A female shrieked as I pulled my arms through hers and leaned forward and found her in me. I felt her hands roaming my back and in my hair. I grabbed her hair in my hands and leaned my waist into hers. I could feel the tears stinging. She admitted how it felt and it tugged it hurt. The challenge was over. The waiting, the apologizes the fights were all over. All that matter was us. I could feel the water wrap around us as my mouth created a new one. The water hit hard on our face letting me feel Ashley slip into my reach perfectly.
I felt her hands grab mine as we walked off the crowd making room for us. They were cheering and I couldn't stop myself from blushing as we went to her car. We drove off to the only place we needed to be home. We are going home together. I felt dumb because I couldn't wipe the dumb smile off my face. I had my Ashley and her hand was in mine. We kissed from the stoplights to the elevator crashing onto her couch unable to keep our hands off of each other. Ashley began to strip my shirt off.
"Fuck the rules." She breathed into my neck and I ribbed the armrest for support as she took off my shorts.
I moaned as her mouth connected with my throat and fingers slipped into my underwear.
"God. I missed you." I felt my lips trembled as she began to go in and out of me.
"Damn and I thought the show was good. I had to watch the encore."
Aiden's figure appeared to light up as the switch went on and lightening struck. I felt my heart drop into my stomach and Ashley refused to look at him. As her body shook in fear I didn't move from mine and I still gripped on to her more now than ever.
"Welcome home ladies." Aiden said before getting up and walking outside of the house.