"Do you really think Ego won't find him?"
It had only taken a few months for Yondu to truly believe that. The disappearance of Ego from public consciousness happened almost overnight; one minute rogue traders were falling over themselves to deal with him, the next he was little more than an urban legend. A dark fairy-tale designed to scare the children – be careful or the lonely god will take you as his own.
Even the endless calls from old 'friends' ceased in the wake of Murlainn's death. Those planning on stealing Peter away were fuelled by greed, not bravery, and very few were willing to risk Yondu's wrath once news of the massacre spread. Whether Ego kept looking for his son or simply moved on when it became clear no-one would bring him, Yondu cannot say. He was rarely willing to ponder the answer to that. It was doubtful that Ego had vanished entirely – he was likely searching for his children on other systems or busy fathering yet more bastards elsewhere – but the less Yondu heard about him, the more their past dealings felt like a distant nightmare.
Before he knew it, Peter was simply another member of the crew; as much a Ravager as Tullk or Kraglin. His transition from isolated child to active participant in their crimes was a gradual one, but by the age of ten he was a natural. His ability to slip into tiny spaces and escape from targets unseen earned them a lot of money over the years, and even those who once hated Peter eventually warmed to their youngest thief. Yondu tried not to betray his own pride in the boy too often. Running a crew was like walking a tightrope; the slightest hint of favouritism could spark a mutiny before he knew it. Other captains had been overthrown for less.
There would be times, however, where he'd buy a doll solely because he knew it would make Peter laugh, or hum one of those blasted songs the boy always listened to without thinking, and it was as glaring a hint as any that he was starting to care a little too much. True, he wouldn't hesitate to set the boy more chores whenever he stepped out of line and the threat of being eaten did come up again once or twice. A day.
However, as months stretched to years and Peter started to grow before Yondu's eyes, he knew that denying his pride in the boy would only make him a fool.
Eili had been the one to point out that he was going soft, long before he realised it himself. She always gave the impression that she saw right through Yondu; ever since their return from Morag had Peter presenting gems he'd allegedly found himself (He hadn't. Yondu and Kraglin had been the ones scanning the debris for the stones' specific properties while Peter explored the ruins, dancing and miming to his songs. Eili didn't need to know that though). The boy's appreciation for the ex-pirate had them returning to her shack more often than usual, more so for the stories she'd tell rather than the rewards each visit brought. More profitable ventures lay elsewhere, but Yondu hardly minded doing business with Eili. He liked her well enough and it was nice to have a client you trusted not to stab you in the back at the end of the day.
Eili soon came to love Peter as though he were her own, to the extent that Yondu imagined she'd be a good replacement if he were to die. In the twelve years before her death, she was always enchanted by how much Peter had grown between visits, and soaked up every word as he described finding some artefact for her. By the fifth visit, Yondu had learned to stand back and watch their interactions unfold with a slight smile, until Eili acknowledged him with a wicked smirk and returned to business.
Not that she could judge him for being obvious. She always upped her reward whenever Peter was involved on the promise that he got a fair share, and sometimes she'd even let him take trinkets off her shelf for free. Yondu had never seen her so soft. Even when he'd first met her, her warmest interactions with him were always teasing; any smile she offered resembling a sneer more often than not. She'd certainly never given him special treatment where business was concerned, let alone a discount for her wares.
Apparently she'd seen a change in him too.
He still thinks of the time Eili took him aside without warning, many years ago. As a thirteen-year-old Peter wandered between the cabinets, engrossed in his Walkman, Eili had grabbed Yondu's arm and whispered, "You love him too, don't you?" with a sly smile.
Yondu hadn't known how to answer that, and had perhaps been a little too flippant when he responded with, "He's just part of the crew, is all."
He hadn't convinced her, of course. Even worse - he hadn't convinced himself. Yondu had only ever wanted to protect Peter without growing attached to him, but that ship had sailed years ago. He accepted that and felt lighter for it.
Loving him, though. That was something different.
Eili's wink, along with her utterance of "You keep tellin' yourself that," continues to haunt him on some nights. She hadn't given him time to think before rushing off to entertain Peter with more tales of her adventures, leaving Yondu to dwell on her words alone.
Years later, he's still dwelling on them.
Yondu cannot lie; he's spent twenty-six years hating the boy as often as loving him. For every joyful exploration of a new planet or swell of pride when Peter learned to shoot or fly his first ship, there'd be times where Peter tested him by swanning off on his own for weeks only to return with a damn smirk on his face. The more he grew into a man, the more the latter occurred. Raising a child on a Ravager ship was always going to result in a rebellious thief desperate for freedom, but there are times where Yondu wishes he had left Peter with Eili or Stakar or literally anyone else, instead of lumbering himself with the responsibility.
Stealing the orb ends up being the boiling point for them both. The point where Yondu wonders if he'll actually have to harm Peter to teach him a lesson; where the arrow that's spent years protecting the boy ends up a hairs-breadth from his throat, while Yondu wonders if part of him wants it to finish the job.
That thought lasts only a second, but it's a second too long.
The relief that floods through him when Peter uses his words to save himself is one Yondu hides behind a smirk and forced laughter. Only later, once Ronan is dead and Xandar is saved, does he let himself wonder if he would ever be able to kill Peter. It doesn't take long to come to the conclusion that no, he couldn't. His heart would never allow the arrow to harm his boy, no matter how loudly his head screamed at it.
He cannot hate Peter entirely. That flicker of love Eili spotted all those years ago has infected him to the point of no return. It's an inconvenience to say the least, but it's one that makes the deep hole within him seem slightly smaller and stops his black heart from shrivelling entirely.
Never is this more evident than when he stares down at the orb, ignoring his men drinking to their victory around him, and clicks it open to find only a doll Peter had loved.
He should be furious, yet all he can do is grin. Many years ago he'd told Peter he would need to steal more than mere trinkets, and now the boy's succeeded in denying him four-billion units.
Yondu couldn't be prouder.
It's been years since he's let himself think about Ego.
The children never stop haunting his dreams, especially as Peter grows. Occasionally he'll see a hint of Alaria in the boy's smile; the little girl had always been happy, even when brought face-to-face with some of the uglier Ravagers. Other times, when Peter's in a foul mood, there'll be a little of Lyxander or Seth in his burning green eyes; their own defiance having been nurtured by the unforgiving streets of home. Throughout the years, Peter reminds Yondu of every single child his greed helped murder, and each time causes guilt to lance through his chest.
Ego, though, he learns to forget. Everything from the man's appearance to his manner fades slowly until only his apt name remains, as though the god truly poses no threat anymore. It's been years since Yondu heard anyone else mention him, and when Kraglin casually brings him up as they fly away from Xandar, leaving Peter to his newfound family, Yondu dismisses all thought of Ego with alarming ease.
He'd forgotten just how dangerous Peter's father was; how desperate he'd once been to take back his son. He'd chosen to believe that Ego was concerning himself elsewhere and that he'd forgotten the child Yondu had stolen away in order to protect.
What a fool he'd been.
The red planet below might have seemed beautiful in the right circumstances. Certainly, it had always enchanted the children upon their final approach; their eyes widening at the crimson leaves and shimmering pools while Yondu spoke of the golden palace that awaited them on the surface, with sprawling grounds they could get lost in forever. That was before he'd realised just how lifeless the planet was. Before he'd realised the beauty was a lure to draw the children in, and that he'd let himself be fooled as well.
He wonders if Peter was lost in wonder too, when he saw his father's planet for the first time. If the excitement of discovering a new world had overtaken him like so many times before, as he unknowingly walked into a trap he may never escape from.
The thought of Ego finally having Peter in his clutches has ice slipping into Yondu's veins, and yet he finds he can't look away from the planet below.
It's been a while since Yondu last thought of Murlainn – the old friend he willingly murdered for Peter's sake – but now the man's dying words are the only thing he can hear.
"How long do you think he'll last under your protection?"
It turns out the answer was twenty-six years.
Yondu's managed to keep Peter alive for twenty-six blessed years, and that's a miracle in itself. There's been near-misses, certainly – nobody ever claimed the life of a Ravager was a safe one – but under Yondu's guardianship, Peter has matured into a healthy young man capable of saving the galaxy. That should be a source of pride, but burning shame grips Yondu's chest as he stares down at Ego.
Twenty-six years may have been a small lifetime for him, but it's a mere blink of an eye for a celestial. Nothing will have changed for Ego. His intentions will have remained the same after all these years - the children he acquires walking corpses from the moment they set foot on his planet – and Peter has already been there too long. The rat is trying to establish contact with him and his friends with little success, and as much as Yondu tries to drown out the noise, its implications have a premature grief settling in his mind.
Of course Ego would return to destroy all his hard work just as everything else has fallen apart. In a matter of hours, Yondu has lost his crew and his home. He might even have lost his son (because damnit if Peter hadn't become just that over the years). It's like a trickster with a very cruel sense of humour has decided to play games with him, and he's not sure what he'll do if he loses Peter on top of everything else. Even in the boy's recent absence, Yondu would often bring up the tracking data on the Milano to ensure she was still out among the stars, and he'd bought a new music-player from a crooked dealer just in case he happened to see Peter again. Knowing he was alive and saving entire worlds with his new family had been enough for Yondu, even as his own crew fell deeper into dissatisfaction around him.
Losing Peter for good will likely have the gaping emptiness within his soul consuming him until there's nothing left but rage. After that, there's no telling what he'll do.
Gamora's voice coming through the comms ignites a hope Yondu thought no longer existed, and he instantly gets to work as though someone has lit a fire within him. Rocket is equally motivated by this small indicator that life still dwells on the planet, and it's a bitter reminder that he cares for Peter as much as Yondu does, despite being equally terrible at showing it. Finding his mirror image in the form of a weird rat is not something Yondu expected to happen, but it's been a very strange day and he doubts things will ever be normal again after this.
At least, not until they have Peter back safe and Yondu's torn Ego to shreds with his bare hands.
The pair of them - plus the little twig clinging to Rocket's shoulder - settle at the controls of the mining ship in record time and set off towards Ego without a second thought. There's no need to discuss what they're doing in depth, which is good. Yondu's bared his soul to his new companions enough today, and his uncertainty over whether Peter still lives threatens to bare a lot more if he so much as opens his mouth. Besides, there's nothing worth saying. They all know that what they're embarking on would be a suicide mission even with years of planning, but the knowledge of that is never going to stop them.
After all, Yondu's always been willing to resort to extremes if it means keeping his boy safe.
A/N - Well, this story ended up being much longer than I imagined when I first sat down to write it...
Thank you so much for reading this! It was a lot of fun to write and I really hope you enjoyed it :)