Drip Control
Maintaining a safe distance between himself and his son, Splinter took a moment to appraise the situation before him. The rat was currently standing at the entrance to a sewer tunnel which led to the large abandoned room his sons regularly used for their skateboarding. The reason for the distance between him and the turtles was mostly due to the turtles currently stretching to their full capacity in an effort to plug the various leaks in the tunnel where water was pouring out. Whilst leaks in the sewer were nothing unusual, Splinter feared these leaks weren't accidental, but so far the only evidence he had to go on was the sledgehammer lying discarded in the damp tunnel and a very large cracked hole in the left wall which Raphael was attempting to plug with his shell.
Eyeing the nunchuck plugging a hole a short distance in front of him, the rat decided it was probably a good idea to get on with the interrogation now, before the whole sewer tunnel flooded. He had a captive audience after all. Carefully picking his way down the tunnel, Splinter stopped at the first son he came across. His red masked boy was currently squatting in front of a large hole where his shell had been inserted. Dirty sewer water ran out from the sides of his shell.
"This is an interesting form of exercise Raphael" commented Splinter, stopping in front of the turtle
"You can thank Donnie for the idea" replied Raphael with a grunt, shifting the blame on his younger brother.
"Why is this tunnel full of holes? You and your brothers use this area for skateboarding, do you not?" continued Splinter, choosing to ignore Raphael's attempts to get rid of him.
Rolling his eyes slightly, Raphael clearly decided it was in his best interests to answer his Father's questions "Yeah, but Mikey thought skateboarding was getting old and asked Donnie to add in some extra challenges"
"These challenges involved a sledgehammer?"
"It was Donnie that made this mess. I'm just a turtle shaped plug in his master plan"
"Where are your brothers?" inquired Splinter with a sigh. He obviously wasn't going to get much more out of Raphael.
"Follow the tunnel round and you'll find them. Oh, and if you see any or our weapons sticking out of strange places, I would just leave them you know"
"Of course, my son. Why would I question a nunchuck in a wall?" glancing around him Splinter headed off down the tunnel "Or your prized Sai holding a pipe together?"
Continuing down the tunnel, Splinter noticed the water level rising from where he assumed was the turtles skateboarding spot. The tunnel itself curved around so when he got to the open space, the water level was rising over his feet and multiple shuriken were wedged in cracks along the brick work. The open space itself, had three various ramps set up in the hollow part of the room. This dropped about three foot lower than the rest of the room and was almost completely submerged in water.
Glancing around the room, Splinter first spotted Leonardo in the top left corner of the room doing a perfect splits 15ft in the air, each foot plugging a different hole in the wall while sewer water flowed out into the already messy area. Not seeing his two youngest, Splinter stepped further into the area.
"Boys, what are you doing" he called into the area
"Master Splinter!" replied Leonardo with surprise followed by a loud bang from within the walls, and a muttered argument reached his ears.
"You tell him!" said one voice
"Do you know how to fix pipes? Then you go deal with Master Splinter" came a snarky answer. The rat could feel his patience wearing thin as his two youngest discussed him as if he were a problem to solve. As if his sensitive hearing couldn't hear their not very quiet conversation! From his position in the corner Leonardo hung his head in shame. Whether it was for his brothers lack of manners or whatever problem they had all caused Splinter couldn't be sure.
"Someone better explain. Now!" called Splinter sharply. A minute of shuffling and banging followed before Michelangelo emerged from a large pipe going into the wall, completely covered in unidentified sewage.
"I'll explain Sensei" said the turtle sadly, approaching his Father.
"Yes, but you will do it from over there!" ordered Splinter as the smell hit his sensitive nose and he took a few steps back from his son.
Scuffing his feet on the floor and with a pout clearly meant to win sympathy Michelangelo commenced his tale of woe.
"Well we've been skateboarding down here for years and it's got kind of bring, there's no challenge anymore! So I asked Donnie if he could do something to make it more awesome down here! Leo suggested we try it blindfolded but that seemed to boring. Raph was all for it too, by the way! So Donnie opened his duffle bag, took out his sledgehammer and said to give him 10 minutes alone in the place!"
So many questions. Why did Donatello have a sledgehammer with him? Why can't they behave for more than 10 minutes at a time? Nodding slightly to show he was listening, Splinter waited for Michelangelo to continue.
"Anyway, we left Donnie like he said and practiced in the tunnel you just came through. Well me and Raph did. Mr Perfect sat meditating."
"Get on with it, Mike!" interrupted the eldest turtle, shifting his weight around in an attempt to get more comfortable in the wall.
"So basically, the sewer water just exploded out of the wall and drenched Raph while we were waiting for Donnie! It was so funny…"
"Michelangelo" growled Splinter in warning
Snapping to attention, the orange clad turtle grinned sheepishly at his father "Well, it turns out Donnie's great idea was to turn the whole place into a water themed Skate arena and when he was readjusting the pipes the pressure built up because they're so old, and it exploded out there where Raph's using his fat shell to plug the hole. It also caused a load of other mini explosions in here and then the walls started to crack under the pressure. A water themed skate park was a totally awesome idea though and…"
Holding up a paw to silence his sons babbling, Splinter took a moment to centre his mind and spirit so he could deal with this. Unfortunately it was proving harder and harder to do. The urge to surrender to his sons stupidity was becoming more tempting with each new endeavour. At that moment another leak sprung up near to Leonardo who hastily showed his last Katana in the hole.
"When will this be fixed?" questioned Splinter as Michelangelo shifted uneasily from foot to foot
"Donnie says it was the pipes fault and not his, since he's obvoulsly never wrong" explained Michelangelo with an eye roll "he keeps saying it'll stop when he reconnects these pipes or something"
"I will leave you four to clear this mess. I will be waiting outside the lair with a hose pipe for your return"
"A hosepipe?" asked Michelangelo with concern
"You four must all be cleaned before you set foot in the lair" explained Splinter with a smirk "I think cold water will be the most effective way to do it"
With that Splinter headed back down the tunnel, as three of his four sons whispered in horror to each other about the cold bath in their future.
As he drew level with Raphael, still with shell in wall he heard the joyful voice of Donatello proclaiming he had fixed the pipe. Raphael was staring at Splinter in horror as his fathe neared him, shell cell in hand.
"Not the hosepipe, Sensei! You can't be serious" complained his red masked son
"Yes, my son. I'm sure your shell is filthy from the sewer water…"
Splinter got no further in taunting Raph, as a loud bang reverberated around the tunnel and the small crack in the wall plugged by Michelangelo's nunchuck exploded in a torrent of sewer water and sludge. Unfortunately, Splinter was stood right in front of said nunchuck and was sent crashing to the ground next to Raphael, drenched in sewer water, mud and just about everything else the sewers had to offer.
"Are you ok, Sensei" asked Raphael in alarm
Groaning slightly, Splinter sat up clutching his left eye as the torrent of water slowed to a steady flow. The nunchuck had fired out of the water and managed to smash the unsuspecting Ninja master in the eye amid the chaos.
"I think so" he muttered in reply, silently cursing his sons and their ridiculous ideas.
"Guess that's 5 for the hosepipe then?" suggested the red masked turtle with a grin
Splinter could only glare in response.
It was 20 minutes later, when April O'Neil stood in front of the lair door with a large hosepipe in hand. Five filthy Ninjas trudged towards her in resignation, Splinter was in front as the four turtles trailed behind.
"We're so dead Donnie! Did you see his eye?" complained Michelangelo with dread
"We're going to be punished for the rest of our lives" muttered Leonardo to Raphael, both of which were stretching out their stiff joints
"You guys smell awful" commented April as they got closer "I hope you guys are ready for this, it's going to be cold"
"Get it over with April" advised Splinter "I will be taking the first shower after this, and then you can help me plan my sons punishment"
"Maybe get some ice for your eye too" she replied
Taking a moment to glare at the turtles behind him, Splinter stepped forward to be jet blasted. Next time he would call his sons to see what they were doing, it was clearly the safer option.
A/N - Thanks for those who reviewed the last chapter, I'd love to know if people are still reading and enjoying this