A Stupid Filler/Trailer

For those who don't understand, Some of the quotes used in my story are from Full Metal Jacket and Apocalypse Now obtained from IMDB and a website containing a transcript of one of the movies. I'm thankful for them. And Becket is the playable character of FEAR 2. He was literally raped by a ghost. And I forgot to include another movie, Oliver Stone's Platoon. And this is very screwy trailer.

Adagio for Strings play...

Itsuki woke up from his sleep and looked out from his hotel window. He though of one thing: getting back into the village.

Haruhi tells the rest of the brigade, "Saddle up! Lock and load!"

At Firebase Haruhistan...

Churuya and Achakura are busy setting up sandbags around the camp. Achakura asked, "We still have more sand from the digging last night. How are we gonna get rid of it all in time?"

"Don't worry, Achakura. I've got a plan." Churuya grinned creepily as they filled yet another one.

Walking to Hinamizawa...

Kyon narrates in his mind, Somebody once wrote: 'Hell is the impossibility of reason.' That's what this place feels like. Hell.

The scene switches to the river of the festival with the Brigage walking along the banks. The village, which had stood for maybe a thousand years, didn't know we were coming to play that day. If they had, they would've run. Haruhi was the eye of her rage. And through her, our captain Ahab, we would screw things wrong yet again. That day she sucked us.

In a dream, Itsuki faced Col. Kurtz, who said, "Free your mind, Itsuki, your cute little ass will follow."

"AAAAHHHHHHHH!" Taniguchi screamed as he got raped by water balloons and squirt guns in slow motion and he kneeled and raised his hands to the sky in an uber dramatic way.

A flashback in Vietnam, "Let's do this whole fucked-up village!" Mason began killing villagers for fun with the Huey's minigun.

Rika gives an ominous warning, "A lie is a lie."

As for Rena, "I'm taking her home! Omochikaeri!"

An argument...

Kyon said, "This is bad, Haruhi. I've got bad vibes here."

Haruhi shouted, "We don't know shit, Kyon, and chances are we're gonna run into something. Think about it."

He bitched, "That's just great, Whadda you want me to do? Send my ass out to get zapped so Itsuki Koizumi just in from the world can get his beauty sleep? Nah!"

She replied, "Hey, take a break! You don't have to be a biatch every day of your life, you know."

Kunikida watched as they left Kyon and Taniguchi in the camp, "I'm glad I ain't going with them. Somewhere out there is the beast and he's hungry tonight."

Yuki added, "They're gonna get raped anyway."

Shion goes crazy...

Shion shouted, "She's taking my Satoshi! I'll kill her!" She looked at the floor and screamed, "I HATE FLOORS!"

Shattered dreams...

Keiichi gasped, "Blast! My dreams of making out with Miss Ass-hina's boobs and getting free tacos have been shattered." Song ends...

The cynic snaps...

Kyon smiled like a psycho. "I'm gonna tear you a new asshole!" He challenged.

"Well, little bitch." Keiichi replied, "Only after you suck the cream lemon out of my oranges!" Heavns Divide begins...

The Rubick's Cube from hell...

"Rika, I've got something important to show you!" Hanyuu shrieked.

"This better be good, Hanyuu," Rika whined, "You're interrupting my early morning happy hour."

"Look," the horned little girl hands her over an innocent looking puzzle box.

"What? A Rubick's Cube!" Rika snapped.

"It's not just any Rubick's cube. It's a gateway to hell!" She warned as several scenes of the story of the story are flashed, including the festival, the clinic and the hotel.

Petals of white

Itsuki feels crazy...

He stood in front of the class of Miss Rumiko, "You are despicable little liars!" The class simply smiled with innocent clueless eyes.

Taniguchi eats at Angel Mort...

"It tastes like diabetes!" He screamed.

South Park comes to town...

Cartman said, "Sorry, Kyle. No Jews allowed at this point."

"Dammit, Cartman," Kyle retorted. Kenny muttered something.

"Hey," Stan said, "Kenny said that Oyashiro-sama is Lord Jesus in Japanese."

Cold as the dark

Romance...

"You're my little flower, Satoko," Butters proclaimed to Satoko at the overlook of the village as the sun dropped, "From this day forward my love for you shall be always be eternal."

"Butters," his dad called, "Get your ass over here." The gentle boy went to his dad. He continued, "Son, we're here on a trip sponsored by the state of Colorado, not on a sex tour for underaged Asian whores."

"Yes, dad," Butters forlornly agreed.

A culinary fascist...

The Soup Nazi passes out cups of soup to Angle Mort employees before Itsuki's turn.

"Crab bisque, twenty yen," He announced to Itsuki.

"What?" he was puzzled, "How come they get this for fourteen?"

"No soup for you!" He snapped at Itsuki and gave him his cash, "Next!"

KFC...

"Where's my Kentucky Fuckin' Fried Chicken!" Kyon blurted at the hapless attendant as he gripped his collar menacingly. Then he realized his error, "Uh, I mean, Where's the colonel!"

When heavens divide!

The Irie clinic...

"AAAARRRGGHH!" Itsuki screamed as he ran out of the room, "Keep away from me, Dr. Teabagger!"

Yutaka Tamaru said to bunch of lounging espers in a closed space, "Shinjin don't surf!"

A dark secret...

"Look at all this intel Arakawa gathered," Itsuki said as he and Kyon searched his room, "He must have been have kidnapped for this." Something banged the door downstairs.

"Shit! Takano's commies are here!" Kyon muttered. "Police his papers and stuff! Don't leave nothin' for the cheese-dicks!"

Kyon's hints...

"Back in '64, the CIA gave up control of covert operations in South-East Asia... handed it over to the US military. From that, MAC,V-SOG's born." Kyon said to Itsuki when he asked about what's SOG.

Pumpkin pie...

"The pie is the key.." Col Kurtz lectured Itsuki.

Aboard the lesbian ship...

A a night at the dump, Rena said to her friend ,"I love this place at night. The stars... there's no right or wrong in them. They're just there."

The wicker man...

"Tell me why are we burning Itsuki Koizumi in the scarecrow?" Rika asked.

"'Cause Nicholas Cage sucks." Mion replied as Kyon burned the bottom straws before he lit his Malboro while Itsuki screamed from the wicker head.

Onigafuchi flashback...

Everyone stood in front of Onigafuchi Marsh. While Mion and Rika tell them about its lore, Kyon is taken back to Perfume River. In it a Huey with a yellow-black horsehead shield got hit by an RPG and both Woods and Mason are screaming and hugging each other for dear life as it spun out of control until splashed dramatically into the water.

"Take a deep breath and hold it right before we go into the water!" Woods fast-talked to Mason, "The chopper will suck us down. Kick for the surface and keep kicking. Don't let go of my hand. We're gonna make it, Rose. Trust me!"

"I trust you but I'm not Rose and this ain't no Titanic!" Replied Mason, "And we don't hold fuckin' hands."

Detective Delicious...

"Detective Oiishi," Asked Itsuki at the noisy mahjong parlor, "I need to talk you."

"Not now," Replied the fat detective, "I'm far too busy being delicious."

Intrigue...

"I thought I'd gone to the limits. I hadn't. The Cenobites gave me an experience beyond limits... pain and pleasure, indivisible." a mutilated Frank Cotton sighed to Julia as he appeared in front of her inside the Saiguden.

A dossier and PTSD...

"This is Mason's dossier," said General Shepherd, "We believe he is somehow involved with the Diclonius facility in Kamakura, Japan, believing he was in Rebirth Island.

"Is that an Elfen Lied refence, sir?" Itsuki asked.

"Goddamnit, don't interrupt me!"

The defection of Kunikida...

Kunikida's last words to Itsuki, "We live in a world where everything we know is wrong." Then he CQCed Itsuki's ass off the bridge Snake Eater-style.

Will they survive? Baka no Naku Koro ni coming soon. When Heavens Divide... Song ends...

"This is the most bullshit trailer I've ever read," Kyon bitched.

"Suck my balls," replied Anime Borat, "And grow a couple of nuts."

"I hang with honeys that are beyond fly". Kimura from Azumanga Daioh said.

"No, they don't, Mr. K," Anime Borat blurted, "You should be in Sex Rehab with Tiger Woods."

Yeah, it's completely pointless crap I've just written for you to preview the next chapter. Please send me ideas. And for for all those horror fans and Azumanga fans, read the prologue arc of the M-rated Grimoire: The Lustbound Heart. Happy Halloween.

Trivia: CQC (Close Quarters Combat) is a system of combined combat techniques which allow rapid alternation between armed and hand-to-hand combat while engaging enemy personnel first featured in Metal Gear Solid 3 while Col. Kurtz is the insane colonel of Apocalypse Now.

Songs used: Heavens Divide by Donna Burke(Peacewalker OST) and Adagio for Strings(Platoon OST).