Deep in the freezing-cold forest, there was a litter of kits, asleep in their mother's warm embrace. Few shuffled in their sleep, and they suckled on their mother desperately. The queen's den was still, yet not eerie. Frost dappled the walls like poison ivy growing on a log, and mist filled the freezing air. The moon shone through a small gap in the camp's ceiling. One small, pale grey kit mewed pitifully. The rest of her littermates did not stir. Her mother, Featherfern, smiled weakly. "What do you need, little one?" The kit looked up at her, padded around on her paws for a few seconds, and rubbed her pelt into her mother's sleepily. Featherfern sighed in bittersweet happiness and sadness. She covered the kit with her tail, and continued to sleep.
Slowly, but surely, the sun began to rise. Her mate Dustfoot padded into the den carefully, as he didn't wish to disturb the kits. He sat down next to her, and brushed his pelt against hers. "Are you alright?" he purred, trying to warm her up. Although the sun was rising, the frost remained. She sighed, and smiled at him weakly. "Of course I'm alright, Dustfoot. I couldn't be happier." she replied. Dustfoot raised an eyebrow, and shrugged his shoulders. "Alright," he said, looking concerned, "If you say so." He twined his tail with hers, and she did the same. Despite his efforts, she still looked somewhat sad.
"Featherfern, what's wrong? You seem worried." He murmured, edging closer to her.
"Honestly, Dustfoot, nothing's wrong. I'm alright." she replied, unmoving.
"The kits are beautiful," he complimented, "What should we name them?" Featherfern shrugged.
"Maybe we could call this one Strawkit." she gestured to the small, pale yellow kit in front of her.
"That sounds nice." Dustfoot said, smiling. An ashy tom stomped into the den, tail waving angrily. One of the kits stirred, and made a loud mewl. He walked over to Dustfoot, and growled in his ear.
"Dustfoot. You were supposed to be up early for a patrol!" he hissed. "Come with me, you can't sit around in the nursery all day. You're not even the one taking care of the kits, anyhow." Dustfoot sighed in annoyance.
"I'm really sorry, Featherfern. I promise, I'll come back for the kits when I'm not busy. Rattail, is this really necessary? My kits were only born a few days ago!" he retorted.
"Dustfoot, if you stay with your kits any longer then soon you won't have kits!" Rattail grumbled.
"Excuse me?" Dustfoot growled, glaring at him. "What are you going to do with our kits?" Rattail rolled his eyes.
"They'll starve. Haven't you realised that we're running out of prey? More kits means more mouths to feed, which means more hunting patrols. Get a move on." Rattail replied. Dustfoot sighed again, and got up. "Again, I really am sorry, Featherfern. He has a point." he said. Featherfern looked sad, and waved her tail anxiously. "You'll be back, right?" she asked.
"Of course." Dustfoot replied. The two toms made their way out of the nursery.
Featherfern nuzzled Strawkit affectionately. She was sure that he would open his eyes sooner than the others; or, at least she hoped so. While tending to her kits, she noticed a splash of light grey in the entrance to the queens' dens. "Ripplebeam?" she called, hoping he would hear. Soon, he came rushing in, herbs in jaw. He dropped them in front of Featherfern clumsily, and she laughed in response. "W-what's up?" he asked, looking around. Grassfoot, the other Iceclan queen, seemed to be preoccupied. "Are the kits... hurt?" he worried, examining them carefully. "Please d-don't tell me they're hurt!" Featherfern chuckled in amusement.
"No, the kits aren't hurt or ill. I just wanted to see you, you worrywart." She laughed. He lowered himself and gave her an affectionate lick on the muzzle. "How are they doing, anyway? Have you given them n-names yet?" he wondered, looking at the litter in faux-contemplation.
"Only one of them," she replied somewhat happily, gesturing to Strawkit, "Dustfoot named him." Ripplebeam flinched at his name. "Dustfoot? Why Dustfoot?" he asked, confused. Featherfern looked around, and frowned. "I guess I didn't tell you, then?" she replied.
"Don't answer a question with a question." He huffed. Featherfern chuckled in response.
"He..." Featherfern pondered different ways to word what she was about to say. If she told Ripplebeam that she had been cheating on Dustfoot with him, he would surely be devastated and worried for Dustfoot. However, she couldn't just lie to him – she loved him too much to do that. So, she compromised. "He agreed to pretend to be my mate, to keep your cover. It's convincing, I know." Ripplebeam looked sad.
"I still don't understand why we couldn't just have kits and be done with it. You could have t-told me, too!" he replied.
"We'd both be exiled and be forced to live like rogues." she replied bitterly. Ripplebeam sniffled quietly.
"Don't remind me. That'd probably be better than living like a bunch of no-good liars, anyhow." he grumbled. Featherfern smiled.
"Don't worry, I've thought about it before. Iceclan is our clan, and I'm always going to be loyal to it – I was born and raised here." She replied.
Ripplebeam sat quietly with Featherfern for a few minutes. "You know what I think that one should be called?" he mumbled, gesturing to the darkish grey tabby kit.
"What?" Featherfern asked sleepily.
"Moonkit. Her pelt is the colour of the moon." he smiled.
"You think so? I think Silverkit would be more suitable." She purred.
"Yeah, but that might be kind of disrespectful to Silverpelt." he replied, worried.
"Alright, if you say so. Her name is Moonkit." Featherfern declared. Grassfoot, the other queen, began to stir.
"Featherfern, I'll see you later. I can't stay any longer." he sighed.
"Goodbye, Ripplebeam." she murmured wistfully, "I love you." And so, she fell asleep.
Eventually, one of the kits opened its eyes. She was a grey she-cat, with dark grey patches over her eyes and a light patch around her jaw. The kit looked around curiously, and eventually bounded up to her mother joyfully. "Wow," she said, grinning, "This place is really cool!"
"Both figuratively and literally, I suppose. Come closer, dear. You shouldn't be so excited, you could catch a cold." Featherfern purred. She looked up at her curiously.
"What's your name?" she asked. Featherfern chuckled.
"What's my name? I'm Featherfern, your mother." Featherfern smiled.
"That's a really pretty name! What's my name? What's a mother?" the kit asked excitedly.
"Your name..." Featherfern looked at the frost dappling the den walls, "Your name is Frostkit." she purred, cleaning Frostkit's fur. "A mother is someone who cares for you deeply, and someone who you will never live without. I am your mother, because you are my child."
"That's a cool name!" she mewed. "Can we play?" Frostkit asked.
"Perhaps later. Why don't you go play with Grassfoot's litter? They look old enough to me." Featherfern said, gently nudging Frostkit in her direction.
"Sounds fun! Okay, mum! See you later!" she replied, bounding off to play with Grassfoot's litter.
After several hours, the other kits opened their eyes, one by one. Featherfern began to grow worried, as Moonkit seemed to be refusing to open her eyes, and didn't open hers until a few hours after the rest of them had. She refused to give one of her kits, a pale yellow tom his name. Featherfern desperately wanted Ripplebeam to name her last kit, despite having named one already. No other cat was more important to her.
She watched her kits play mossball carefully. Strawkit's dusty yellow pelt blended into the wooden camp. Featherfern concluded that this was why he couldn't catch the mossball very well – after all, he was taller than Featherfern or Dustfoot had ever been when they were kits, and was still very eager to play along. She pondered his potential future to herself quietly. With that kind of raw determination, he had great potential to lead the clan, and perhaps even become deputy? Featherfern decided that was what she most wanted to see in her son – a high position. She was confident in her ability to recognise potential in cats; after all, when Flurrywing was merely Flurrypaw, she encouraged her to become deputy, in spite of her meek nature and size. Perhaps she didn't do it in the kindest manner, but in the long run she was happier. Nothing stood in the way of her making Dustfoot the future deputy, so why shouldn't she?
Featherfern purred quietly to herself. Something in the back of her mind told her that she should let him be a kit while he still has the chance to, but she ignored it outright. She trusted her own judgement, and that was all she needed. She heard someone padding anxiously into the queen's den, and recognised it to be Ripplebeam. Grassfoot stared at him judgementally. "This is medicine c-cat business!" he huffed, trying to be angry. Grassfoot wasn't amused, and continued to watch over her kits. He walked over to her, fidgeting with his claws. "What's wrong?" she asked, frowning.
"I'll tell you in the evening, people might get the wrong idea." he replied. Featherfern gave him a knowing look.
"Earlier today, not long after I saw-"Featherfern gave him a warning glare, and he caught himself, "Not long after I saw to one of the apprentices, I received a vision. It was sudden, and it caught me off guard. I think you should k-know about it, it's... I mean, I think it's referring to one of your kits."
"Well, what was it? What was the vision?" Featherfern asked calmly, keeping an eye on her kits. She privately hoped it would be about Strawkit.
"You know your grey kit with the patches on its eyes? I saw her in it. She was represented by a kind of... abstract mass, jumping around playfully with another lighter one. They were somehow distinct, and yet incomprehensible. Then, the light one began to fade away. The other one was doing- was doing something, I couldn't really make out what it was – and then it all went dark." he retold. Featherfern opened her eyes wide in shock.
"Frostkit? Are you sure?" she gasped, looking at the bumbling kit playing with Grassfoot's litter. "What does it mean? Have you figured it out yet? Please don't tell me my kit is going to be a murderer, Ripplebeam. You can't- you can't have just magically figured that out!" she almost shouted desperately. Some of the kits looked over to her curiously, and others shied away in fright.
Ripplebeam looked taken aback. "I- I'm sorry Featherfern! I never- I never said any of that, I've only been an actual medicine cat for a few moons now!" he retorted, eyes watering, "Maybe... maybe I c-can't always be- can't always have everything figured out. I-" he clearly wanted to continue, but stopped himself. Featherfern wanted to comfort him, but couldn't. It would raise suspicion. She took in a deep breath. "Ripplebeam, I..." She tried to form a sentence, but words failed her.
"I'm sorry. I- I've been l-looking for Sturdyleaf for ages now- I've looked all around camp, and then in the territory, and then I did that twice over, but I can't find him! These past few hours have been really stressful for me, and nobody un- nobody else could help me right now." he said, trying to fight back tears.
A tall, well-muscled tom walked into the queen's den. He sniffed around, attempting to find the cause of the noise. The scarred half of his faced turned to the kits playing, and they hid behind Grassfoot. He walked over to Ripplebeam, and stood by him. His face was weary, and he looked sad – uncharacteristic, for such a strong and silent figure of the clan. "D-de-deadeye, I didn't mean to cause any... I didn't mean t-t-to cause trouble, I'll be..." Ripplebeam looked afraid, trying to save himself.
"Ripplebeam, I'd advise against making more of a fool of yourself." He stood still, glaring down at Ripplebeam. His eyes ran briefly down Featherfern and her kits. His ear flicked slightly when he caught sight of Moonkit. "These are desolate times. You must come with me, lest you never know the truth." Ripplebeam held back a laugh at the use of 'lest', but he still looked afraid.
"O-of course, Deadeye." he stuttered in reply. They both left the medicine cat den.
After a few hours, Featherfern grew anxious, waiting for Ripplebeam to return. She couldn't possibly tell where he had gone; and with Deadeye, one of the strongest and most ferocious cats of the clan? Frostkit and Moonkit padded up to her. Frostkit curled up next to her to comfort her, while Moonkit sat and watched. "Mum, are you okay?" Frostkit asked, looking concerned. Featherfern attempted to smile.
"I'm okay, Frostkit." she purred unsteadily, nuzzling Frostkit. Moonkit watched, but made no movement. "There wasn't any need to stop playing, you know."
"Underkit wasn't playing fair." she huffed in mock-annoyance. "Strawkit was being super silly about the whole thing. He stood by Underkit for no reason!"
"I'm sure that must have hurt." Featherfern chuckled. She looked over to Moonkit. "What about you, Moonkit? Why did you stop playing?" she asked. Moonkit didn't reply, but only stared. Featherfern grew increasingly unsettled. In spite of Frostkit's warm and fuzzy company, she was worried about Ripplebeam.
Suddenly, Ripplebeam came running in. "F-f-featherfern!" he cried. "Come- come with me, there's something I really need to tell you!" he said, ushering her out of the queens' den.
"My kits!" she replied desperately.
"They may sleep with me tonight." Grassfoot smiled, watching the two. "It seems like you've got yourself quite the mess, Featherfern." she purred in possible amusement.
"Hmph. Keep your mouth shut, Grassfoot, before I do it for you." She hissed.
"This is desperate, Featherfern! Y-you've got to come with me!" he cried again, finally getting her to the medicine cat's den.
Inside the den were several neatly laid out herbs, arranged in order of strength. Featherfern looked around in awe – no matter how many times she went in, the medicine cat den still struck her as quite the miracle. Featherfern gave the air a polite sniff. It smelled strange, as if someone wasn't meant to be there. She was much less in awe when her eyes fell upon Deadeye, Kitestar and Flurrywing, sitting in the den together. There were also several unidentified cats. Flurrywing gave her a polite smile. "If this is so urgent, why did you first tell the medicine cat apprentice, and why did you bring some random queen?" Kitestar asked, although there was little malice in his voice. "Kitestar, be patient." Flurrywing purred. It was astonishing to see how far she'd come.
"It's-it's a complicated story, maybe- m-maybe Deadeye can tell it better." he stuttered, looking over to Deadeye desperately. He shook his head. "He needs to learn to cope on his own." Deadeye stated. No cat in the room, not even Kitestar, questioned him. "Well, um, alright." Ripplebeam mumbled. He shook his pelt, tried to puff out his chest, and raised his voice.
"Kitestar, Flurrywing, Featherfern. I thought you should all know this. K-kitestar and Flurrywing, you're both really good at keeping track of the clan, and stuff," he began, looking anxious to see the others' faces, "Featherfern, you're... you're really important to me, and... yeah. Anyway, I should probably actually start telling it to you, right? I'm really bad at this, o-oh no..." he faltered. No cat made a move, but Kitestar began to look impatient. Flurrywing looked at him.
"I know that- that nobody has seen Sturdyleaf at all today. There's a good reason- a good reason for that." Ripplebeam began, "Sturdyleaf is dead." Shock fell on every cat's face, especially on Kitestar's.
"No." Kitestar whispered, looking down to the floor.
"I know." Ripplebeam replied, tears rolling down his cheeks, "Deadeye- h- he came to fetch me a few hours ago – but it feels like for-forever ago now. We travelled to the cliffs on the outskirts of the c-clan borders, where Mountainclan's territory ends and the unclaimed mountains start. Then, we saw Sturdyleaf and a she-cat, both with tons of tiny kits surrounding them. They were- they were mewling so desperately, and I just cried." Ripplebeam paused, waiting for everyone to finish processing the information.
"I won't tell you everything- I want- I want to honour Sturdyleaf's memory in every single way that I can. Sturdyleaf... he'd been seeing a cat up in the mountains. I couldn't make out her scent, it was raining heavily, but I think- I think she was a rogue. Deadeye was the only cat he shared this with, because- because he trusted him, better than," Ripplebeam sobbed loudly, "b-better than he trusted me, his... his apprentice. I... I don't understand!" he cried. The cats let him sit there for a few minutes. Featherfern wished she could just run up to him and comfort him. It was affecting him more than she expected it to. Soon, he continued.
"So, that was the reason he always- he always wanted to gather herbs after gatherings. He was just seeing this she-cat. Deadeye told me- he told me, after Sturdyleaf had died, that he had been planning on having kits with the rogue for some moons now. In his words, he was... he had been growing older, and he wanted to carry on his legacy before he grew ill. He loved the she-cat so much, that eventually- eventually he couldn't take it. The kits- he thought his kits were going to die, that they were going to catch a terrible chill, or that a fox would take them like it almost took her. Sturdyleaf was so grief-struck, he- he threw himself off the cliff before we could talk him out of it. We brought th- the rogue back and her kits- but she's dying, and the kits aren't doing much better." He finished.
Kitestar looked at Ripplebeam, and around the room. He let one tear loose, and tried to regain composure. He walked over to the rogue and her kits. "Is this all you can do for them?" he asked grimly, not looking at Ripplebeam.
"Kitestar, I'm trying. How can I- I can't do as well as I normally can, my mentor is dead!" Ripplebeam cried. He waited for Sturdyleaf to glare at him, but no such glare came. Ripplebeam sobbed loudly. Kitestar looked at him sorrowfully. "I know it's hard. I watched Sturdyleaf grow and be shaped as a medicine cat- he was named Sturdyleaf under me, and I can't believe he's gone either." Kitestar sat next to him. "But, like a true medicine cat, you must continue with your duties, just as he would have. The sun will still rise in the morning, and with sunrise comes a new opportunity."
Ripplebeam sniffed, and looked Kitestar directly in the eye. "You sound- you s-sound just like him when you say that." he sobbed. Eventually, Featherfern couldn't take it. She rushed over to Ripplebeam, and let him cry into her chest for a few minutes. She gave him comforting murmurs as he cried. Kitestar watched the two somewhat curiously, but chose not to act on his curiosity.
"I know. It will be hard. But, like everything, it shall pass." he replied. "Perhaps you could take this opportunity to honour him. Sturdyleaf would want his kits and mate to be alive and happy, no matter where he is, just like..." Kitestar paused. Ripplebeam gave him a pleading look.
"You're... you're right. I'll t-try my best, but I'll... what if- what if they don't survive?" he worried, looking at the weak rogue and her litter.
"Then you will have tried your best, and the sun will continue to rise. Sturdyleaf knew that you would never do him wrong." he replied, giving him a reassuring smile.
"It feels like I didn't know him at all, though! He knew all sorts of things a-about me, I told him- I told him my deepest, darkest secrets, but Deadeye told me so, so many things that I didn't know about him! What am I supposed to do?" he sobbed.
"You're not supposed to do anything. You pick your own path, Ripplebeam."
"Stop talking like that!" Ripplebeam shouted.
"Ripplebeam, I trust you. Let's save these kits." Kitestar encouraged. Ripplebeam looked down, and began sifting through his herbs.
"Feverfew should help the kits; they'll gulp it up right away. They're so starved; the queen has little milk because she's so thin and sickly. Thyme should help the she-cat, if she wakes up." Ripplebeam mumbled, throwing herbs around. Flurrywing, Kitestar and Deadeye began to follow his directions. "We'll need a queen to feed the kits so that they don't starve. Maybe you could also give them a mix of catmint and lavender, just to be sure – I mean, I'm never sure."
"It's lucky that you brought a queen along with you." Deadeye replied. Featherfern got up, sat by the kits and allowed them to feed off her milk. They gulped up whatever was given to them quickly and easily. The kits almost reminded her of her litter when they were younger. "We should probably also give the rogue some food."
After almost an hour of rushing around, trying to find suitable fresh-kill for the rogue once she woke up, they could finally rest. It was almost midnight. "Ripplebeam, I have something to tell you. At sunhigh tomorrow, I will inform the clan of Sturdyleaf's death. In any case, I cannot rest. I am going to sit by his body. If anyone who has no duties wishes to join me, then they may." Kitestar stood up. Deadeye and Flurrywing both followed him out of camp.
Eventually, the rogue woke up. She looked around confusedly, and began hacking loudly. "Miss..." Ripplebeam began, looking sad and confused. "My..." she coughed, "My name is Honey... where... where am..." she hacked again and again, struggling to finish her sentence.
"Please, don't try to- to talk. It's going to be okay, your kits are all safe." he reassured.
"D... don't lie... to me. I know I'm going... I'm going to die..." she sputtered.
"Honey, you're not going to die. Please. Take some poppy seeds, they help ease the pain." he nudged them towards her.
"I can't eat." her eyes began to close, and her pulse quickened. She was struggling to stay alive.
"Please!" Ripplebeam cried desperately.
"Sturdyleaf and I are going to be together again." She hacked, and then subsequently died.
"No!" he cried. "I can't... I..." he sobbed.
"Ripplebeam, it's not your fault. She was beyond your help." Featherfern reassured. Ripplebeam sobbed, and lied down next to her. The rogue's kits continued to feed on her, and some grew tired. Featherfern twined her tail with Ripplebeam's, and they slept next to each other for the first time in moons.