A/N: I wanted to take this opportunity to wish one of my most loyal readers and reviewers a very happy birthday. Here's hoping you have a great day olliebella!
She could hear the pointed heels of Horatio's ex-wife follow her into the supervisor's office. She had kept the sunny smile on her face until the woman she barely knew, yet had come to hate, closed the door loudly behind her.
Her expression changed from warm and friendly to cold and hard in an instant as she dropped all pretences of being welcoming. "Why have you come here?" she asked the older woman icily as she moved to behind the desk, yet remained standing, her arms crossed over her chest.
Laura flicked her shoulder-length hair back out of her face as she pinned Calleigh with a mean stare. "I've come to see John, not his latest bed-buddy."
Her eyes narrowed. She wanted nothing more than to walk around the desk and throttle the poor excuse for a woman in front of her. She willed herself to stay where she was, knowing that the wooden piece of furniture was the only thing stopping her from beating the living daylights out of her unwelcome visitor. "He's not here at the moment. And besides, you're not welcome around here."
Laura had the temerity to look affronted at that. "Says who?" she huffed as she dropped her purse down on the couch and took a couple of large strides towards the desk.
"I do. You have no business here. Why don't you get back on the next plane and go home?"
"No. Not until I get what I came for," the older woman shot back as she shook her head vigorously, feeling the red mists of rage descend upon her quickly.
Calleigh let out an exasperated sigh as her head fell back. Why couldn't this woman get it through her thick skull? Horatio wanted nothing to do with her anymore. "He doesn't want you, why can't you understand that?"
"He doesn't know what he wants at the moment."
"And how would you know, Laura?" Calleigh almost spat her name, as if the mere thought of her caused a bad taste to take up residence in her mouth. "You've never given a damn about his feelings before, why start now?"
Her face paled for a few brief moments. Just what had John told this woman about her? Had he painted her to be some kind of heartless villain in the whole piece? It was hardly as if he were angel himself, he'd wanted their physical reunion just as much as she did. Until he'd pulled away and rejected her, anyway. No, he wasn't going to get away with this scot-free. He'd played his part, and she was going to damn well put this stuck-up blond-haired bitch in her place.
"Did he tell you how he kissed me?" she began, with a satisfied smile on her face. "How he let me tear his clothes off. How he ran his hands all over my body. How hard he was when I touched him?"
Calleigh took a couple of deep breaths, hoping that her nervousness was not readily apparent to the other woman. It would do no good to let Laura see that her verbal barrages were hitting a little too close to home. Common sense dictated that Horatio's ex was just trying to goad her, but how much truth was there to what she was saying? Had Horatio only told her the bare minimum, trying to spare her the hurtful details of what he'd almost done? Just how far had they gone?
"He wanted it just as much as I did, missy. I saw it in his eyes when he looked at me, he still wants me as much as he did twenty years ago." Laura continued to press home her point, taking satisfaction from the small twitches on the younger woman's face as she carried on regardless. She was on a roll now, she wasn't going to stop until she'd finished. "Tell me, is he as much of an animal in the sack as he was all those years ago? He was a beast, always up for it, he never turned down a chance for a quick lay. Is he all over you like he was me?"
She knew that she couldn't answer that honestly. Yes, Horatio had been forceful and firm with her the other night, but it wasn't as if they were tearing each other's clothes off each and every time they came in contact with each other. Most of the time, their physical unions were sweet and loving, not just some kind of meaningless flash of passion that was quickly doused within a few minutes. There was still so much that Horatio was unsure about, his behaviour in the bedroom had been as unpredictable as his moods during the rest of the day recently.
It was unfair to compare his sexual prowess as a young man to the wearied and tortured person that he had become. The last twenty years had taken a significant amount out of him, to the point that it had left him questioning his worth as a man. It was little wonder that his confidence as a whole had taken a huge hit, especially considering the things he had been through recently.
She couldn't imagine Horatio as some cocky young lover-boy, the man she knew was far too reserved and respectful of women to just go around sleeping with people for the sake of it. But all young men were randy, sex was often all they thought about. She knew that from experience, and the immature younger men that she had dated.
With age came wisdom, suddenly it wasn't about the sexual side of a relationship that really mattered. Horatio seemed to understand that there was more to a meaningful relationship than what went on in the bedroom. When they made love, it felt like a declaration of his feelings towards her, that he wanted to spend as much time as possible showing her exactly how he felt. Less was certainly more in that regard, each time they came together, it actually meant something to the both of them.
Horatio had seen too many horrors, been through too much, to willingly give the most intimate parts of himself away to just anyone. His heart had long been hidden behind deep, impenetrable walls, never letting anyone get too close to him. He had become guarded, almost secretive about his personal life. No one was allowed to come too close, he wouldn't let them for the fear of being hurt again.
In those terrible few months after his abduction, he had been too weak in body and mind to even consider embarking on a relationship with her. He had struggled vainly with his body's own weaknesses and the emotional barriers that prevented him from accepting her loving embrace. He considered himself too damaged and scarred to be loved by a woman, both inside and out.
But she had worn him down with her stubborn insistence that she only saw a brave and beautiful man when she looked at him. Even now, she wasn't sure that he believed her when she said that she found the marks on his body as something to admire. To her, they were lasting reminders of what a good man he was and how much he had risked to protect the people he loved.
It had become clear to her that he felt as if the scars should be something to be ashamed of, that much she had gleaned from her conversation with Natalia when he'd first returned to the Lab. He'd hated his younger colleague to see the marks that he carried with him every day, never once rolling his sleeves up or taking off his suit jacket, even in the most humid of temperatures.
The only time she had ever seen him in a t-shirt had been when he knew it would just be the two of them. She assumed that he'd given up trying to hide them from her, she had cared for him too intimately as he recovered to not have noticed the healing wounds on his body. After all that he had been through, he was not likely to be as confident in himself and his ageing body, that would surely be a reason as to why he was sometimes so timid and unsure of himself in the sanctity of their bedroom, wouldn't it?
Laura continued to stare at her, waiting for answer. "Well? Got nothing to say, Blondie?" she sneered as she placed her hands on her hips. Satisfied that she had made her point well.
"What happens between Horatio and I is none of your business."
"What's the matter, he doesn't do it for you? I never had that problem with him, he knew exactly what to do to make me scream."
"If you had any idea what he's been through…..you'd leave him alone and stop messing with his head!" Calleigh shouted, feeling her faint control of her emotions fading by the second.
"Oh yes, poor John. Look what he's been through. Let's all pity him," Laura shot back facetiously. "What about the shit-heap of a mess he left behind!"
"He did it to protect you. If you weren't so wrapped up in your own self-importance you might have seen that."
The blonde woman had a point. She had been too wrapped up in her own feelings to consider what John might have been going through. That was just the way she was though, who else was going to look after number one? It wasn't as if her parents or her brother had ever really paid her much attention or consideration. Thinking about herself had been the only way that she'd been able to get her needs met.
She'd come too far, said too much to back down now. If she was going to go down, she was going to do it fighting. "He's always loved me, you know that? Even when we split he still came back begging for more….wanting to give our marriage another go."
"Well, that boat's long since sailed, Laura. He's moved on in his life without you."
She smirked at Calleigh's words. "The man is so messed up that he doesn't know what it is that he wants."
That much was true, Calleigh couldn't deny. But where did this evil little witch get off in playing with his mind, messing with his feelings?
"If you really loved him, you'd see how vulnerable he is right now." Horatio would hate the fact that she had said such a thing, yet she had to make Laura understand just how confused he was at the moment.
"He's not vulnerable. He knew exactly what he was doing when he kissed me….when he ran his hands up and down my body. He was rock hard when I touched him."
"He's not well, Laura!" she screamed. Suddenly, the hustle and bustle in the corridor outside quietened to no more than an imperceptible hush. It took a concerted amount of effort, but she finally managed to get her fiery Southern temper back under control. "You took advantage of him, you made him do those things. He would never have done that to you…..you should be ashamed of yourself. You're lucky that I don't charge you with sexual assault."
Laura let out a humourless laugh at the empty threat. "Really? You think John's going to thank you for airing his dirty linen in public? Then everyone will know just how vulnerable he is. Besides, it's not sexual assault if he wanted it in the first place. He's a grown man, he can make his own choices. Don't come blaming me if he wanted to choose a roll in the hay with me over you. That's your problem, not mine."
"You don't understand what they did to him. They hurt him….badly."
"They broke a few bones, they didn't give him brain damage. The fact remains that John knew what he was doing when he kissed me. He wanted it and you can't deny that." She felt ashamed that such caustic words were flowing from her own mouth, she couldn't stop herself though. There was something about this Southern woman that really irked at her, that perky smile and demeanour were nothing more than a façade for the true woman that lurked underneath.
God, she wanted to break every bone in this vile woman's body and teach her a thing or two about brain damage. How could any one person be so cruel and vindictive, talking so coldly about the man she professed to still have feelings for? This woman was a real piece of work, just what had she said to Horatio to make him do those things with her?
She knew that if he were in his right mind that he would not have gone near her, would not have allowed this sorry excuse for a woman past his carefully constructed defences. Perhaps that was the point though, that he still wasn't in his right mind, that he still wasn't strong enough to re-shore those defences. There were elements of the man she had fallen in love with that were slowly returning, had she been fooling herself to think that things were starting to get back to the way they were?
He had asked her to take a step back as he regained his physical strength and mental fortitude, and she had done so, albeit warily. There had been great strides forwards in his recovery, yet neither her nor Horatio could deny that there was still such a long road to travel, and she knew that he would not be able to move forward until his ex-wife and her conniving ways had been removed from his life entirely.
"You need to stay away from him if you know what's good for you," Calleigh warned, her voice dangerously low.
"Is that some kind of threat?"
"No, it's a promise. If you don't stay away from him…..I promise that you'll regret it."
Laura crossed her arms over her chest again as she sneered at the woman who was battling her for a place in John's heart. "I've already had the same speech from Andy. I'm not going to let anyone tell me what I can and can't do. I certainly won't be dictated to by some blond bimbo like you."
Calleigh smiled inwardly. Good. Let her underestimate me. If she comes anywhere near Horatio again she's going to wish she'd never been born.
"What are you smiling at?" Laura scowled as she took in the self-satisfied smirk of the woman a few feet away from her.
"If you're planning to fight for him…..you won't win. You know that, right?"
"What makes you so sure that he won't choose me?"
"Because Horatio loves me," was Calleigh's simple reply.
"But what about John? Who does he love?"
Calleigh's face fell as she realised that her arch enemy was right. There could be no denying that the man she loved was still struggling with piecing together two fractured lives into one whole. He'd flitted between the Horatio she knew and another version that she barely recognised. When the dust had settled, who or what would remain?
"Don't be so sure that it's you he loves, Blondie. Maybe you don't know the man you're sleeping with as well as you think you do."
Satisfied that she had made her point, Laura picked up her purse and left the room with a victorious smile on her face, knowing that her parting shot had landed squarely on target.
Calleigh felt the air leave her body in a rush as the events of the past few minutes began to slowly sink in. As showdowns went, it had been pretty spectacular, yet she expected nothing else from the fiery woman she had come to understand through the small pieces of information that she had gleaned from Horatio and Andy.
She hadn't expected Laura to be quite the piece of work that she had been though, there was something so inherently unlikable about the woman that it amazed her that Horatio had ever seen anything in her in the first place. No matter which way she tried to spin it, her thoughts returned to the same thing, over and over. She could no longer deny that Horatio and the younger man from his past, John, were in many ways two completely different people.
When he'd been young, he'd not yet been weighed down by the weight of the world and the responsibility that he seemed hell-bent on taking on for other people. He had perhaps once been a keen and eager young man, ready to set the world alight and make his own way in life. One by one, the struggles that befell him had chipped away at the lighter side of his personality as he slowly loosened his grip on his youthful freedom, leaving behind a wary and reserved man in its place.
Years of heartache had caused him to retreat in upon himself, shielding his wounded heart from further distress. She had no doubt that there were striking similarities between his past and present personas. That steely grit and determination had likely always been there, as had the heroic way in which he would sacrifice his own safety for that of others. Yet there was no denying that there were noticeable differences between the two, Horatio's behaviour in the past week or so had served to show her that he still had a great deal of work to do in order to come to terms with the person he was now.
But she would help him to do that, she would stay by his side and provide the strength and support that he so clearly needed at such a difficult time. Laura and her meddling ways be damned, she would not stand in the way of a relationship that Calleigh knew was worth fighting for. They would deal with each hurdle as it came, each time Horatio faltered, she would reinforce the fact that she loved him, and that one day, he would learn to love and accept himself too.