Chapter Five:
You are perfect to me

There were no words to describe how awful Blaine Devon Anderson felt as he finished his set at the strip club, the entire time Kurt had been sitting there drinking lemonade (non alcoholic) and staring at him with his judgmental bitch face.

In some ways it was good that Kurt had been sitting there the entire time, it meant that Kurt actually was giving him a chance, them a chance to talk about this, figure out what was really going on…but on the other hand, Kurt always liked to deal with important news face to face and so what if this was a repeat of what happened when Blaine had first come to New York. What if Kurt was waiting to end things with him?

Blaine, or rather Eric, didn't let his face falter.

Once he was fully dressed, Blaine slipped on a large coat and came out, his ones overflowing in his pocket as he saw Kurt standing at the bar, a dark expression on his face, arms crossed threateningly over his chest.

It was making Blaine feel extremely weak. This was it, this was going to be the moment that Kurt Hummel broke up with him.

"Hey," Blaine said shyly, the fear heard in his voice as he rubbed his neck awkwardly. Blaine wasn't sure how this was going to go down, he wasn't sure what they could say or what would happen. All Blaine wanted to do was appreciated that right now, in this very moment he was engaged to the man of his dreams….maybe soon it would be nothing but a dream.

"Hey," Kurt said briskly, his eyes cast down and to the side.

Blaine's stomach lurched, he had hurt Kurt too much for the other man to look at him, he had spoiled their chances of living a happily ever after hadn't he? Kurt deserved so much better than him and Blaine felt all the chills rise in his chest.

"I'm sorry Kurt," he replied as he looked around and saw all the guys interested in him, "Can we go somewhere? Grab a cup of coffee or something, I just don't feel comfortable in here right now?" he commented as Kurt raised an eyebrow.

"I'm not going to pay to have sex with you," Kurt commented as Blaine looked at him horrified, "I'm not even going to have sex with you."

"I know," Blaine said desperately, his heart beating too fast and too hard in his chest, "I don't have sex with anyone, when you enter remission we can be careful about having sex."

"And don't tell me you haven't been having sex when you go out by yourself" Kurt said harshly and Blaine shook his head quickly.

"No, I don't have sex, I'm a stripper, but I don't have sex." Blaine said looking around as he noticed a couple of people pleasuring themselves just by looking at him, "at least not outside of masturbation and you already knew about that."

Kurt sighed before looking Blaine over and found he was carrying a black, sleek, messenger bag. He sighed deeply before taking Blaine's wrist and pulling him out, Blaine letting him. Kurt didn't say anything until they were nearly ten minutes away from the bar.

"Why?" he said shortly, "Why are you a stripper? Why are you sleeping with people for money?"

Blaine shook his head again, "Kurt, I promise you, I promise you with everything I have and everything I am, I'm not selling my body in that way to others. I haven't had sex since you last had sex, I promise with all my heart," he tried to explain as they started walking out towards a nearby coffee shop.

Kurt looked him over, his blue-green-grey eyes piercing into Blaine's honey-hazel ones. Kurt was staring at him, investigating him, trying to draw out each and every shred of truth that was inside of Blaine. Finally he smiled in relief and nodded. "I believe you," he said as Blaine frowned.

Why was Kurt smiling? Was it really out of relief that Blaine wasn't having sex with other people? Blaine was still a stripper.

"I…I know that you hate me," Blaine said as Kurt stopped. They were standing right outside of the coffee shop. Blaine could read on Kurt's face that his assumption was not only wrong, but that Kurt felt sickened by it.

"I don't hate you," Kurt replied bluntly, "I hate what you're doing, sure, but I don't hate you."

Blaine shifted uncomfortably, "O-Okay, so not hate, but repulsed maybe? Angry? Furious?" he said as Kurt sighed and looked away.

"None of those, I just don't like what you're doing and I definitely don't like that you didn't tell me that this was how you were making money," Kurt sighed and placed a comforting hand on Blaine's shoulder before moving it onto Blaine's cheek, "I love you Blaine Anderson, I'm not breaking up with you. I'm allowed to be angry though, aren't I?"

Blaine smiled finally, so Kurt finally knew the truth and he wasn't breaking up with him? Kurt was actually allowing the two of them to be together. He hadn't sacrificed Kurt to save Kurt, or at least his relationship with Kurt.

Kurt opened the door to the shop and then pointed to a table in the back of the cafe and looked at Blaine, "Go sit over there, I'm going to get us some coffees, decaf for me, and then we can just talk. Figure all of this out,"

"Kurt, I…" Blaine started but Kurt once again gestured to the table.

"Go sit Blaine, once we're both sitting down we can figure everything out, go sit down," Kurt instructed. Blaine nodded obediently and went to sit down, his mind racing with all of his thoughts, thoughts about what had happened and what might happen.

Five minutes later Kurt was joining him, he placed two coffees and a plate with four biscotti on the table, "So, we have a grande non fat mocha and a medium drip," he said as Blaine managed to smile up at Kurt.

"You know my coffee order," he joked as Kurt smiled, shaking his head.

"You know you're really adorable sometimes, even though I'm mad at you I can admit that," he said as Blaine's heart started to feel the deep moments of love between them.

Kurt sat down and Blaine looked at him, seeing the pain but also the softness in Kurt's eyes, "Did you really think I'd break up with you?" he asked as Blaine nodded.

"I'm not going to stop doing it until the hospital settlement comes in," he said, his hands shaking. Kurt reached out and held one of them, "I have to do this, even if you no longer want to be with me, I have to do this work."

"Okay," Kurt nodded, "I still don't quite understand, but I'm trying to. You're doing this for me after all."

"And you're okay with it?" Blaine asked confused.

Kurt sighed, "No, I'm not 'okay' with it, but I'm trying to understand. What I'm feeling is anger, sorrow, pain, love, and sympathy. You never needed to do this Blaine, if you could have only told me the truth."

"I know," Blaine nodded as he dared himself to take a sip of his coffee, "I'm sorry, I was just so scared about losing you. I wanted to be supportive, I wanted you to know that I can be supportive of you."

Kurt nodded with another deep breath, "You not telling me doesn't make me feel very good, but my body is pretty able right now, steadier than you would believe so you're going to have to let me also be a supportive husband-to-be."

Blaine nodded quickly, "Okay, so…"

"I want you to continue to work with June," Kurt said, "This is not a suggestion or a question, this is what I want and this is what I hope you are going to do," Blaine nodded as he listened, "You are going to continue doing this as well, if that's what you feel you need to do, no sex, but you can't tell June."

Blaine looked down, "I'm not sure I have time," he shifted uncomfortably, "Sometimes things overlap and if June doesn't know I have no excuse."

Kurt frowned, "Which is why I'm going to take your place on those nights, well until my body feels and looks worse, I can apply makeup right now and this will give you time to reestablish your relationship with June before she knows and I know that's important to you."

Blaine frowned, "You can't…" he said nervously as Kurt glared playfully.

"It's what's going to happen Anderson, if you want us together this is what's going to happen. I won't put too much strain on my body, I promise, but this is what we're going to do. Okay, Anderson?" Kurt said boldly as Blaine nodded, he was unsure how to argue with Kurt.

"O-Okay."