I hope you all enjoy the second part of Ranger and Stephanie's wedding. Anything familiar belongs to Janet. The mistakes are mine.
Chapter 23
Ranger's face softened at my words, and I wrapped my fingers around his, leaning close while we waited for our cue to head inside. I didn't let go of Ranger at all as we joined our friends and family, using the same entrance as the Justice of the Peace, from the side of the room instead of the aisle. That will come later when we exit as Mr. and Mrs. Manoso, or Mrs. Plum - Manoso. Guess I'm going to have to decide quickly what I want to be called besides Babe or Stephanie.
It was a little weird to not hear the wedding march play, but I really liked the quiet moment Ranger and I shared before we joined everybody. It was just Ranger and I standing between two, four-foot-tall columns that were topped with matching flower arrangements to draw attention to the view of the ocean beyond us while also framing Ranger and I. Martin's genius again. He ordered the same type of flowers for these as the ones used in the bouquet Mary Lou helpfully snagged when we passed close to the front row.
The Justice of the Peace was taking point, and the sun shining into the floor-to-ceiling windows behind him enclosed his body - and I guess ours, too - in a fuzzy sort of halo. It wasn't as in your face as a stained-glass window, but I thought it was a nice touch. The JP started off by saying a few opening words, something along the lines of the Dearly Beloved ... ones. I'd asked if he could work in a poem that I found and thought was perfect to sum up what I know our marriage will be somewhere between his schpeel and our actual vows. Ranger and I stood in front of everyone we love - and a few we tolerate - my hands squeezing the hell out of his, waiting for the part where we'll promise to love each other forever and - as Mary Lou would say - other 'crap like that'.
"What is marriage?" The JP began, speaking quietly, but the room heard every word due to it going dead silent as soon as the ceremony began."Marriage is more than just the exchange of rings and the sharing of a household. It is much more than just living together. It is the desire to truly want to know and understand another human being; to feel and share in that person's happiness, as well as their pain. Marriage is to never feel alone; but rather, to know that you always have a friend; a partner in life that you can laugh and cry with. To know that you always have that special someone to share your innermost thoughts and fears and know that you will be heard."
He took a breath and you could feel everyone inhale right along with him.
"Marriage is helping your partner be the absolute best that they can be, while still being able to experience your own needs and goals. Marriage is love; true love that goes far beyond passion. It is a love that you can reach for in times of crisis as well as joy, and know it will be there to comfort and to share," he finished.
I wanted to break out in applause when he stopped reading. That's what my marriage to Dickie lacked, and my relationship with Joe would have needed to survive. But I'm glad holy matrimony with Dickwad failed and that my thing with Joe crashed and burned, because - at the risk of sounding like a dopey bride on her wedding day - I think Ranger and I really were meant to be together at some point.
When the time came for us to speak, my nerves kicked in. Ranger and I discussed vows briefly and I knew I didn't want anything too churchy or nausea-inducing. Ranger ended up humoring me when I suggested we write our own so we'd have something meaningful to remember from the day. And Ranger, once again, went along with what I wanted when I said I'd like to wait until today to hear what he wrote.
My wedding to Dickie was all about planning a huge Burg event and pleasing both our families. Mine and Ranger's wedding I wanted to be the complete opposite of what I'd already done, and also not what Ranger had done. The day I married Orr, I've tried hard to totally block out. Today, I want to remember for the rest of my life. My eyes met Ranger's and nothing could have moved my ass from this spot. I was barely breathing when Ranger started to speak.
"Stephanie, a number of people, including the two of us, thought that it wouldn't work between us. Our backgrounds were too different, we're both too stubborn and independent to compromise on something this important, that our lives would never slow down enough for us to catch up to each other, but I intend to spend every single moment we have together proving them, and ourselves, wrong about everything said."
I was already leaning forward to kiss Ranger when I heard a quiet throat clear from the man standing with us. Shit. I can't kiss Ranger until I tell him what I wrote. This is fucking report day at school all over again. I straightened my spine, mentally told myself to grow a pair, and forced my body to focus only on Ranger's perfect face. I took a deep breath and prayed that I wouldn't screw this up.
"Ranger, you once told me that you were going to broaden my horizons. And you have. Not just with flashy cars or the people in your life you've let me get to know. You've shown me how easy it can be to love and trust someone completely, and not have to change who I am to do it. And for that, I want to thank you ... and also promise you that you'll never regret loving me."
I inwardly cheered. I did it! My eyes were stinging a little after seeing the warmth Ranger let show in his, but I didn't start bawling or anything. We were handed our rings and Ranger picked up the small one that matched the band on my engagement ring, while I took the one I'd picked out for Ranger. A white gold band with a brushed satin center so it wouldn't blind - or alert - someone during a stakeout.
Ranger and I repeated the 'with this ring' stuff, then our fingers were no longer bare. The JP pronounced us husband and wife and suddenly it all came down to the moment I know Ranger has been looking forward to. Ranger likes to kiss, and he really loves kissing me. And right now he has a licensed official standing there telling him to.
Ranger needed no prompting or permission, though. Those dark brown eyes were already locked onto my mouth before the poor guy had even finished speaking. I watched Ranger's face come closer and I felt my stomach tighten when his lips covered mine. Ranger excels at everything oral, and now I get to brag that my husband is the best kisser on the planet.
Ranger didn't half-ass the kiss, either. Opinions don't matter to him, and Ranger didn't give a crap that a roomful of people, including his family, were staring holes into us. He'd end the kiss when he's good and ready. And I wasn't really paying attention to anything except the feel of Ranger's mouth moving against my own.
Too soon for my liking, and probably too long for everyone else's, Ranger lifted his head and let the Justice of the Peace wrap up the ceremony. He wished us and our marriage well, then Ranger took my arm and we walked up the aisle together. On the way out of the room, I tried to avoid bumping into any of the columns or flowers that were almost identical to the ones at the little altar which had been placed at intervals along the fabric-lined aisle.
As soon as Ranger and I passed the last row of seats, like it had been choreographed, people starting in the first row followed behind us. By the time we reached the reception area, Ranger and I were surrounded by everyone. There were no uncomfortable pauses or nervous foot shuffling as people waited to find out what the hell they were supposed to be doing. The transition from sappy time to party time was seamless.
Just like the afternoon had started, Ella and Mary Lou were the first ones to hug me in between dabbing their eyes. Next were Ranger's family, and then my own. My parents' congratulations were a little stiff, but we've never been a huggy, wish you the best, kind of family. When Ranger and I finally got a little breathing room, Julie came over to us.
"Here, Steph," she said, my ring held between her two fingers."I made sure nothing happened to it, just like I promised."
Ranger looked from Julie's hand to my face.
"Julie was nice enough to act as my ring's bodyguard while we got married. Security must run in the family." I slipped my engagement ring back on my finger in front of my new wedding band, and held out my hand to Julie."What do you think, Julie? Do the rings look good together?"
"Yeah. It looks like you rolled your finger in glitter."
Or diamond dust, I thought to myself.
"Congratulations," Rachel said, coming up behind Julie and putting her hands on Julie's shoulders."It was a beautiful ceremony."
"It was, wasn't it?" I said."If I didn't have Martin, it wouldn't have turned out nearly as good."
"Martin played only a small part in this, Babe," Ranger told me."Today was all you."
"And you, too. You said yes or no to a bunch of questions I asked."
"It was the same with Ron and I," Rachel told us."We wanted to enjoy our engagement, not stress each other out over wedding preparations."
"Since stress seems to find me," I said to her,"I try to avoid purposely creating it."
"Hey, Steph, when do we get to dance with you?" Woody asked from a few feet away.
"Never," was Ranger's answer before we saw the photographer crook her finger at us.
Ranger and I left with Alison to have a few pictures taken while everyone else got first crack at the open bar. Afterwards, we talked to a few of the guys before it was time for our first dance as a married couple. I'm not the greatest dancer and Ranger is but doesn't do it very often - or at all - so I've definitely been waiting for this. All I had to do is plaster myself to Ranger and let him do all the work.
Ranger wrapped his arms around me as the song started to play, bringing me back to when we were on the Tavish case and had to dance at the country club while we tried to locate the bastard. I leaned my head on Ranger's shoulder and tried to commit this moment to memory. Actually listening to the lyrics of the song I first heard in Miami, while being held securely in Ranger's arms, made me want to go back and marry him all over again.
When I look into your eyes
It's like watching the night sky
Or a beautiful sunrise
Well, there's so much they hold
And just like them old stars
I see that you've come so far
To be right where you are
How old is your soul?
Well, I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
And when you're needing your space
To do some navigating
I'll be here patiently waiting
To see what you find
'Cause even the stars they burn
Some even fall to the earth
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it
No, I won't give up
I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
The tools and gifts we got, yeah, we got a lot at stake
And in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend
For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not, and who I am
I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up, still looking up.
Well, I won't give up on us (no I'm not giving up)
God knows I'm tough enough (I am tough, I am loved)
We've got a lot to learn (we're alive, we are loved)
God knows we're worth it (and we're worth it)
I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
When the song ended, I tipped my head back and looked up at Ranger. His eyes were already on me. And it struck me just how comfortable Ranger is with himself. Wearing a tux and dancing with me phased him about as much as knocking a mouthy skip to the ground when they were stupid enough to talk back to him. He's present in every moment, and isn't uncomfortable in any situation. Which is big if you take into account the number of times I've seen one of the guys tug at their buttoned up collars or the cuffs on their sleeves. They of course look sexy as hell, but formal wear isn't something the men are all that used to.
Martin suggested - and Ranger and I agreed - to do both the mother/son and father/daughter dances right after ours so we could spend the rest of the night together. I watched Ranger with Coleta and had a hard time actually listening to my dad who was trying to talk to me.
"You look happy," he said.
I brought my attention back to him."I am."
"Ranger is the one you wanted all along, isn't he?"
"Yeah, but like Ranger said, we didn't think we could make a relationship work. I've always wanted what I couldn't have, and I wanted Ranger more than I'd ever wanted anything."
"It didn't take Ranger long to admit he wanted you right back," my dad said, surprising me by saying something like that.
"Once we were honest with each other, everything just ... clicked."
No way in hell am I telling my father that what I thought was going to end up being just a one-night stand led to this day.
"Your mother ..."
"I'm pretty sure I know what you're going to say, Dad, but I don't want to talk about her today. They'll be plenty of time to discuss Mom's absence from a pretty important dinner and her choosing to show up today, but it won't be until I feel like dealing with her."
Luckily, the song ended and again Ranger rescued me. Ranger pulled out the chair for me at our table and then sat down beside me while I took a healthy swallow of champagne. Since we weren't having a real formal or traditional wedding, it wasn't hard to explain why we didn't ask anyone to make toasts today. I would've asked Mary Lou to say something and maybe Tank, but Mary Lou would have made herself sick worrying about speaking in front of this particular group, Tank isn't a public speaking, share your feelings kind of guy, and Ranger probably didn't want his parents talking about what an amazing human being he is in front of the men he feels he has to terrify daily. So I had no problem ditching a potentially awkward part of the evening.
As a good alternative to the toasts, I'd told everyone, which means I mentioned it to Ella and she made sure everybody knew there'd be a large guest book available if anyone wanted to say something to, or about, us that could be kept private. Plus, Alison said she could make a video for us if guests wanted to be part of one. That made me question the idea, because I was worried about what Lester might say, but more curious about what everyone else would. And with a video, Ranger and I could relive the day by watching it when we got back to town.
I scooted my chair closer to Ranger's and spotted Martin moving through the room. I caught his eye and gave him a thumbs up. Martin winked at me in reply and quickly disappeared into the crowd when he noticed that Ranger caught the wink. I didn't think it was right to leave everyone standing during the reception, so the room was filled with round, linen covered tables. Small candles were lit around the bases of the tall centerpieces to give the slowly darkening room more light without ruining the intimacy of the space. Since I know absolutely nothing about decorating crap, Martin convinced me that taller flowers inside clear vases would make the tables look pretty, but wouldn't interfere with conversations if people chose to talk to each other.
The food was delicious, and since we didn't go with a sit down dinner - more of a cross between a cocktail party and a dinner - the food was brought out and removed as needed. Nothing was heavy, overcooked, or inedible. We'd chosen well. The guys wouldn't starve despite the hours they'd be here, and I wouldn't be too full after eating to dance.
Ranger draped an arm across the back of my chair as the guys and his family came over to talk to us. When I could see the plate again that had been underneath my food, I suggested to Ranger that we go out onto the terrace for a few minutes. My arm circled Ranger's waist as we left the noise behind for the relative quiet of the outdoors. I had caved and kissed the fireworks idea goodbye, but we didn't need them. The sunset over the Atlantic Ocean as a backdrop was enough.
The waves were steadily crashing onto the beach and I felt my body relax even more into Ranger's. That sound never fails to calm me, which is why I escape to Point Pleasant whenever I'm scared or need a little peace. The sky was ranging in colors from dark blue, to pink, then orange, leading into a bright yellow as the sun set into the Atlantic. I turned my head just in time to catch Alison sneaking up behind us to get off a few rounds. I glanced at Ranger and shrugged. At least it hadn't been a gun repeatedly shooting at us this time.
Ranger leaned his back against the railing and pulled my body flush to his. I looped my arms around Ranger's neck and let him support my weight, being careful not to catapult us over the side.
"Was today how you imagined it?" He asked me.
"No."
Ranger was silent, waiting for me to tell him who he had to kill for fucking things up.
I smiled up at him."Relax, Ranger. You don't have to hurt anyone. I was going to say that I couldn't have imagined a day this good. Even the weather stayed nice so we could enjoy the view."
"I'm definitely enjoying the view, Babe," Ranger said, before straightening his big body and kissing me.
"My view has been pretty incredible, too," I whispered against Ranger's mouth when he pulled back slightly.
"Maybe we should leave for the honeymoon tomorrow," Ranger told me, skimming his lips across my cheek, then moving to my neck."The place I have lined up is too far away for what I want to do right now."
"Which is what exactly?" I asked, flirting a little.
"Which is ... to get you naked and on a flat surface."
"Any flat surface?" I asked.
"Yes. In fact, it doesn't have to be flat. And I don't really need a surface."
"You do have a lot of muscles," I said, kissing the underside of his jaw and inhaling his Bulgari scented skin.
"And I know how to use every one of them," Ranger told me.
Boy, did he.
"Hey," Lester called,"you're hogging the bride."
"Since she's my bride, I'm allowed to 'hog' her."
I put my mouth close to Ranger's ear."You're allowed to ravish her, too."
"Careful, Babe," Ranger said.
"What?"I asked, innocently.
Lester looked from Ranger to me. He couldn't hear what we were saying, but he knew he was missing something.
"Uh-oh," Lester said."I know that look."
"You'd better not be familiar with that look, Santos," Ranger warned.
Lester clearly didn't get what Ranger's problem was.
"Don't pay any attention to Ranger," I told Lester,"he's feeling cranky."
"I'm feeling something," Ranger told me,"and cranky isn't it."
I wasn't asking for any more information about his current state, or I'd be feeling just as 'cranky' as Ranger is.
"Were you looking for me?" I asked Lester.
"Yes. The guys are expecting a dance with the bride, and I want the first one."
"Won't your date be jealous?" Ranger asked him, referring to Grandma.
"Nah. Edna's cool. She's probably into sharing."
"Eww, Lester. Don't say that. It's gross."
"It's probably also true," Ranger told me.
I smacked Ranger's arm and then kissed him before walking over to Lester.
"I don't mind dancing with everyone," I told him,"but all hands stay above my waist and no one can step on my new shoes."
Lester appeared offended."I've never stepped on a woman's toes."
My eyebrows lifted.
"Okay, I haven't stepped on any toes while dancing."
"Good. Let's keep it that way," I told him, protecting my brand new, four-inch, slingback pumps from potential harm.
"I'll be keeping my eyes on every set of hands," Ranger said, following behind us.
"Have you met my bodyguard?" I asked Lester, as the three of us went back into the building.
"Yeah. He reminds me of the guy you just married."
"Yep, I do believe I see a few similarities," I said, giving Ranger a heated head-to-toe scan, before going onto the dance floor with Lester.
I took turns dancing with the guys, Ranger, and his dad and brother. Then refueled by sipping champagne and picking off of Ranger's plate. Val came over while Ranger was busy talking to Tank and showed me the picture she'd snapped of Ranger and I on the terrace when we'd been alone and Ranger had been kissing me. His hands were resting on my lower back and the placement of his thumbs and fingers above my ass formed a sort of heart shape against my dress. If I'd seen something like this in one of those bridal magazines, I would've said it was cheesy and definitely gag-worthy, but knowing that it had been unintentional, and that they were Ranger's hands, made me actually love it. Valerie sent it to my phone so I could show Ranger later.
The reception continued and I once again thanked Martin for helping me figure out a schedule so the evening didn't feel like it dragged on. I did away with the garter toss altogether. I didn't think it was safe for the guys to be anywhere near an unsuspecting woman's skirt. She might end up losing her panties instead of gaining a garter. And if one of Ranger's sisters happened to be that woman, there could be major bloodshed. I did toss my bouquet, though, but I totally cheated by chucking it towards where Julie, Mary Alice, and Angie were standing, just so one of them could leave with something from today. Marion, Lula, and Connie looked like they were ready to take anyone out to get it, but one death glare from me had them backing off, letting the kid who caught it - Julie - keep her prize.
Big Dog looked relieved that Marion ended up empty-handed, and Carl appeared pissed off that Marion and Big Dog seemed so chummy. Apparently their love triangle that started around the time of the Tavish incident hasn't been completely resolved. Last I heard, Carl didn't know Marion dumped him for Big Dog. I'd like to say I feel bad for Carl, but he'd bet on my own triangle too many times for me to be at all sympathetic.
I put that thought aside and concentrated on what we get to do now. Next to seeing Ranger in his tux, and hearing what Ranger had written about me, the cake cutting is what I've been most excited about. Knowing the cake Ella had made for us contained no fruit, fiber, or good for yous of any kind, had my stomach almost growling in anticipation. It was a large three-tiered vanilla cake with buttercream icing and a fondant cover, and thin black fondant ribbons around the base of each layer. Ella had made a diamond pattern on each tier and accentuated every diamond point with a tiny, edible black jewel. It was elegant, beautiful, and I mouthed a thank you to Ella again when I saw it.
Ranger cut into the bottom layer and fed me almost an entire slice, piece by agonizingly slow piece. I managed to get one bite into Ranger's mouth, but he stopped any further attempts by grabbing my wrist and preventing me from pulling my hand back.
"Not so fast, Babe," Ranger said."You have a little frosting right here."
And Ranger licked my fingers clean. I tried hard not to blush when I felt his tongue against my finger, but I'm sure my color change could be detected, by Ranger at least. His eyes crinkled at the corners and Ranger leaned forward to make sure my lips were frosting-free, too.
Ella's cake was delicious, but I had to say Ranger tasted even better. And I was tempted to take Ranger in one hand, and the cake in the other, and make a break for the nearest empty room with a locking door. Ranger must have been scanning my brain again, because he gave me a wolf grin. I was sure Ranger wouldn't have minded feeding me the whole three layers, either. I looked more closely at him. Yep, I'd be eating the layers while naked if that sexy smile is anything to go by.
"Are you getting honeymoon ideas again?" I asked him, quietly.
"Yes. I just added a few new ones," he said back.
"Well, keep them in mind," I told Ranger."The reception's almost over and then it'll be just us somewhere ... tropical?"
"Nice attempt, Babe," Ranger said to me,"but I'm not telling you anything until you're inside the plane."
"I had to try," I said.
"And I was expecting you to. But if Julie couldn't get it out of me, neither will you."
"It's not nice to let your daughter fail on her first real mission. You should have given her something."
"You learn early on, Steph, that you'll win some battles, but you'll also lose some."
"You really are a hardass, aren't you?" I asked Ranger.
"In a little while I'll let you find out for yourself just how hard my ass really is ... along with other body parts."
That's a job I can't wait to get my hands on.
It was getting close to eight and nearing the end of our festivities when I heard Mary Lou swear.
"Son of a bitch!" She said.
"Uh-oh," I whispered to Ranger, and hurried over to her.
Sure enough, Mary Lou was standing with Lenny, clutching her even rounder stomach, and looking down with horror at her now wet dress.
"Oh crap," I said when I reached her.
"You can say that again," Mary Lou told me, sounding like her teeth were grinding together."I'm sorry, Steph. I've been having pains throughout the day, but I thought I'd have a few more hours before anything happened."
"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked her.
We'd been together earlier and I didn't see Mary Lou so much as wince.
"You had enough on your plate, Steph, you didn't need to worry about me giving birth in the aisle. This kid has taken this long to show up, and he or she couldn't have waited one more freakin' hour?"
Mary Lou didn't want to know ahead of time if she was having another boy, so they planned on being just as surprised as the baby when it came out.
"I'm not an expert on babies," I told Mary Lou,"but even I know they rarely wait for anything."
Lenny had one arm around Mary Lou and a cell to his ear. Ranger and I listened to Mary Lou bite back another curse while waiting for Lenny to get off the phone with, I'd guess, their doctor.
"He wants us to come in," Lenny said to us."Since contractions have been happening through the day, this might be quicker than the last one."
Lenny left Mary Lou with me and went to grab her things from the table.
"We'll follow you to the hospital," I told a panting Mary Lou, when Lenny came back with her purse and the light jacket she'd brought with her.
"No. You guys have a honeymoon to get started on. I'll be fine."
"Mare, stop being an idiot. There's no way in hell I'm leaving town while my best friend is in labor. We can catch a later flight if we need to. Knowing Ranger, he probably has a private jet at his beck and call."
"I do know someone," Ranger said.
"Of course you do. You know everyone," I said to him."I'm still expecting the president to show up on our doorstep any day now." I turned my head towards Mary Lou again and narrowed my eyes at her husband."Lenny, you'd better take good care of her."
"I will."
Ranger and I watched them walk out and then we went to do a round of goodbyes so we could also leave. I don't want Mary Lou in any kind of pain, but I couldn't have made up a better excuse to run out on everyone early. Ranger drove us back to Trenton and we immediately went to St. Francis.
We created quite a buzz, walking around the hospital in our wedding gear, but I didn't give a crap about wagging tongues or the Burg grapevine. I just wanted to make sure May Lou and the baby were okay. Lenny told us that it'd probably be a few hours at the earliest, so Ranger and I did go back to the apartment to change.
"What are you doing?" I asked Ranger, as I found myself in his arms and four feet off the ground.
"Carrying you over the threshold, Babe."
I'd forgotten all about that. Clearly, Ranger hadn't. I kissed the base of his neck before Ranger put me down in the hall and I hurried to the bedroom to get changed and back to the hospital. When we entered the antiseptic-y smelling space again, it was obvious that the end was near. Much sooner than anyone expected.
Ranger got us each a cup of coffee and we settled into the waiting room with Mary Lou and Lenny's families. Ranger had his arm around my shoulders, and I was pressed against him with my own arm resting along his thigh, when Lenny came to tell us that Mary Lou was doing good and had given birth to a healthy baby girl. I'd rather take a pitchfork to the head than admit to having an estrogen attack over baby news, but I was feeling oddly emotional. Mary Lou has a daughter. After having a bunch of boys, she really wanted a little girl. I smiled at Ranger.
"That smile is scaring me, Babe," he said."Are you starting to think about babies already?"
"Yeah, but only Stankovic babies. Mary Lou loves her boys, but she'd been hoping for a girl this time around."
"Seems Mary Lou got her way," Ranger said to me.
"She usually does," I told him.
As soon as Lenny gave us the go ahead, I was out of my chair and on my way to Mary Lou's room. And Ranger was right behind me.
"Steph, Ranger, meet Megan Ann Stankovic," Lenny told us, looking down at Mary Lou and the little pink bundle she was cradling.
"I swear, I didn't mean to ruin your day, Steph," Mary Lou said, holding their first, and probably last, Stankovic girl close.
"Are you kidding?" I said."To have your daughter born on our wedding day is perfect."
"How so?" Mary Lou asked.
She was exhausted, but that wouldn't stop Mary Lou from socializing with adults for a change.
"Isn't it obvious?" I asked.
"No," Ranger and Mary Lou said at the same time.
Jeez, and these are the two people who know me the best.
"Thanks to little Megan there, I'll never have to worry about forgetting my wedding anniversary. Every time you send out invitations for her birthday party, it'll remind me."
"Babe."
"What? I forgot Christmas last year and that date never changes. Even with a bunch of lit up trees, Christmas carols playing in every store, and fat guys in red suits everywhere, I still didn't get anything done until Christmas Eve."
"I'll make sure you always remember our anniversary, Steph."
"I bet he will," Mary Lou said from the bed, her eyebrows wagging suggestively.
"Get your head out of the gutter, Mary Lou," I told her."It's that kind of dirty thinking that got you one of those in the first place."
As if Megan had taken offense to my comment, she began to cry. Loudly. Yup, that's exactly why I don't want a baby. They cry because there's something wrong, but they can't talk yet to tell you what the hell to do to make it stop. A major design flaw if you ask me.
"She's a really cute kid, Mary Lou, but I'm still glad we used condoms during my round of antibiotics so we wouldn't end up with something that sounds like that."
"You might change your mind, Steph," Mary Lou told me, trying to quiet Megan down.
Megan didn't quiet down. If anything she got even louder. That told me right there that Megan is going to take after her mother. Mary Lou is harder to ignore than I am when I'm upset about something.
"Nope. I'm pretty sure if all babies are that noisy, I won't change my mind at all. I kind of have Julie now, and she's perfect. She's funny, smart, and doesn't cry, even when she's being held hostage."
"Julie is one of a kind," Ranger said to me.
"Yep, she is. So there's no need to try to make another one of her."
"Remind me to say 'I told you so' when you end up pushing something the size of a watermelon out your doodah," she told me.
"Clearly they have her loaded up with drugs," I mock whispered to Ranger."Mary Lou's delusional."
"I am not. If anything, they didn't give me enough drugs. I felt every pain, push, and pull," Mary Lou said.
"And that right there is why you will not be saying I told you so ... ever. I don't like being in pain ... it hurts."
"That's a sound argument, Babe."
"Thank you."
"It's a pathetic argument," Mary Lou said to us,"but I've got my hands full dealing with another whiny girl right now, so I'm going to let that one go."
"Hey, I'm not whiny ... I'm smart."
"Whatever you say," Mary Lou told me.
"Okay, it's time to go," I informed Ranger."When Mary Lou doesn't have a good comeback, I know she's at the end of her rope." I turned to Mary Lou."I want pictures as soon as the two of you have rested up."
"I'll send you some."
"Good," I told her."I'll check on you tomorrow."
"Oh no you don't. You get your ass on a plane so I can have something good to think about when I'm walking the floor at two in the morning."
"But ..."
"But nothing, Steph. You go and have a good time, and bring me back something from wherever the hell Ranger's taking you."
"That sounds like an order, Steph," Ranger said, obviously amused.
"I know that tone well," Lenny told Ranger."That particular one is a direct order."
I blew out a breath."Okay, but if something happens, or you need me at all, you'd better call."
"I will. Now go get Ranger naked and send me pictures."
"Mary Lou!"
She laughed at my flushed face."That's not what I meant, but you know ... maybe that is exactly what I meant."
"Let's go, Ranger, before Mary Lou goes against medical advice and gets started on baby number twelve."
As I was leaving with Ranger, I heard Mary Lou talking to Lenny over Megan's fussing.
"We don't have twelve kids, do we?" She asked him.
"No. It only feels like we do," he assured her.
I shook my head as the door closed behind us.
"What's it going to be, Steph?" Ranger asked me.
"You heard her. I've been given my marching orders. I'm supposed to get you naked as soon as we get to where we're going."
"You're sure?"
"Yeah. Mary Lou will be overrun with people for the next couple of days, and she really will kick my ass if I don't buy her something from someplace other than Quaker Bridge."
"Would you rather stay at Rangeman tonight and leave tomorrow morning?" He asked me."You thought you were joking, but we can leave anytime."
"You're really connected, aren't you?"
"Not in the same way Connie is, but I do okay."
"Even though this could be considered a long day, I'm not at all tired," I told him."I really want to see what you have planned. Unless you'd rather wait."
"Babe, I want nothing more than to get you out of your clothes and onto a bed. The location doesn't matter."
"What? You don't like the t-shirt the guys got me?"
I'd changed into the "First Lady of Rangeman" one they gave me weeks ago and the jeans Ranger has said makes my ass look especially grabbable.
"You make the t-shirt look good, and you are the First Lady of everything, but I like what it's covering better."
"You do seem to be a boob man," I told him.
"I'm an equal opportunist when it comes to your body, Babe."
I laced my fingers through Ranger's as we left the hospital and made our way out to his car.
"And my body appreciates it," I told him.
"Your body will appreciate it even more when I get you completely alone."
"If we board a plane soon," I said to him, trying to figure out where our honeymoon will take place,"how long exactly will it be until we're completely alone?"
"A few hours," was all that Ranger would give away.
He opened the passenger's door for me, and as I slid onto the leather seat, I told myself that I could hold out a few hours before jumping my husband. Then again, I thought when I watched Ranger angle his muscled body behind the wheel, maybe I'm giving me too much credit.
A/N: The song Stephanie and Ranger danced to was "I Won't Give Up" by Jason Mraz, and the "What Is Marriage?" poem that the Justice of the Peace recited, I found online and it was written by an anonymous writer.