Chapter Two Welcome to My Life Part I

Taming the Alpha

Written by AndiCullen104

Beta-ed by Khyharah :)

A/N- Thank you so much for the reviews on the first chapter. You guys are amazing! Now without further ado...

Warning- This chapter has an allusion to abuse, please do not read if you are triggered by this.

Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place,
Like somehow you just don't belong
And no one understands you?
Do you ever wanna run away?
Do you lock yourself in your room
With the radio on turned up so loud
That no one hears you're screaming?

No, you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

~Welcome to My Life by Simple Plan

JPOV

Darkness surrounded me, enveloped my being. My body felt heavy and I couldn't remember a single thing. I felt like I should be feeling and remembering something but every time I tried to grasp at that something it would float away. Leaving me empty handed and with no idea what was going on. Time moved slowly, and I briefly wondered if I had died.

I don't remember dieing.

I'm not even sure if I like how death feels if that is what happened. The plus side nothing hurts. Downside is I know there is something I'm supposed to aware of and I have no clue what that should be. To top it off, I can't even feel angry about it, because it's almost like emotions doesn't exist here.

Were there ever emotions? Have I always been like this?

I'm just going to slip away.

~~~~~TTA~~~~~

Jacob.

Huh?

Jacob.

W what? I'm here or I think I am.

Watch, young Jacob.

Okay.

~~~~~TTA~~~~~

The darkness slowly began to lighten and I watched as colors began to swim in my vision momentarily blinding me. I closed my eyes against the drastic change, doing my best to clear my foggy brain. I knew the presence was with me, but I couldn't see him only feel the shimmer of his mind. It reminded me of something but I couldn't for the life of me remember.

Watch.

Alright.

I looked into a home that seemed to tickle my memory yet nothing came to mind. It was a modest home with an old TV and a large very used sofa in front of it. There was carpeting and there was a shelf lined with pictures and books along the right wall with a large window on top of it. The day was overcast but let in enough light that I could see around this living space.

Where is this? Have I been here before? I asked him. I felt the absence of my emotions as if I were hollow it was weird. I waited for a response yet none came however a little boy walked into the living room. He was small if I had to guess I'd say five or six years old. The boy idly brushed his long ebony hair out of his face and took a small action figure out of his pocket. I watched him play all by himself, using his imagination, to take him to a different world.

A woman came into the room with a small smile on her face as she watched what I assumed to be her son play. She was very thin and was wearing a blue sundress with a white flower pattern. She tucked her black hair behind her ear as she watched her son bounce around the room.

The moment was shattered when the boy spoke.

"Mama, my friend Joey wants to know why I don't have a Daddy." He said staring up at her with a serious expression on his face.

"Embry none of this nonsense!" She paused before continuing. "You don't even have a friend

named Joey." His mother replied the smile and lightness to her face gone. She had her lips pursed in anger but there was a pain so deep in her eyes.

"He is to real!" The boy pouted stubbornly.

"No he is not!" She turned her back on him as she stared into another room.

"I just want a Daddy." He whispered quietly. The woman wiped the tears from her eyes before leaving the room.

Darkness overcame my vision once more as I was pulled from the boy and Mother.

Who were they? I think I knew them.

Watch, Jacob.

Fine.

I felt a tugging sensation and when I opened my eyes I found myself in the forest. It was raining heavily and again the familiarity of it filled me yet nothing came to mind. I was emotionless and if I did have my feelings I'd be pretty pissed that I can't remember a damn thing when I know these places. Or at least I think I do.

A large dark wolf sprinted into view well actually more like tumbled into the scene. I can feel the vibrations of the ground from its impact. The blinding panic of the animal was clear to anyone who could happen upon this beast. I watched it take out a tree and heard a snap of its bones neither slowed him down. I followed it as it ran sometimes he would go in complete circles and he fell quite a bit. A little niggle filtered in my brain, but I couldn't place where I had seen this before.

Time moved quickly and I watched as the wolf lost energy. I could see the desperation in its eyes and the way he was going to waste away without nourishment. I really thought that this animal was going to die, but with just a small amount of his energy that he had left, I saw him take down a deer. He ate as much as his stomach could take and with blood dripping down his muzzle he let out a howl crying out for his pack. Though I knew he was a lone wolf. For now. That thought cameout of nowhere, but was gone before I could process it.

The next scene landed me in a small kitchen with a three person family eating dinner. It was tensely silent. I bet you could hear a pin drop from a mile away. The little boy sitting there was picking at his vegetables carefully keeping his eyes on his plate not at all glancing at the man or woman. His shoulders were hunkered down as if he was waiting for a rebuke at any moment.

I guess he was.

"Boy, do you not appreciate the meal your Mama made?" The man said looking down on his son with black eyes full of hate.

"Paul was just um... lost in his thoughts, right Paul?" His Mother said shakily as her eyes darted between the man and her son. Paul's wide eyes stared at his father in panic not being able to answer. He was so afraid that I can see the trembles racking his tiny frame. His silence caused a violent reaction in his father as he threw his plate across the table at him. The little boy was quick enough to dodge the glass plate that was aimed straight for his chest. This must not be new.

I felt like I should feel something at this point but I was completely void of any and all emotions.

"Run Paulie," she ordered him. The little boy did not need any more incentive and took off like a bat out of hell. I was pulled after him and saw him rush into what I imagined was his room. It was cluttered with toys and mess. Paul pulled open his closet and shut it behind him. I could hear his quiet whimpers and prayers that she would be alright.

In the kitchen I could hear thuds, curses, and the tearing of clothes.

"Please! No!" She cried out.

"Shut up, bitch."

I was yanked out of there so fast that my head spun. Now I definitely knew I should be feeling anything, anything at all, yet I was a complete blank.

A/N- So what did you think? I'd love to hear your thoughts. Thanks for reading!