Summary:

A/U This is my take on what should have happened after Addison's conversation with Meredith on "Piece of My Heart" and how these events will affect the lives of Addison and Derek, and those around them.

ThanX go out to my excellent Beta AE

Author's Note:

Hey ya'll! I'm so sorry it took me so long to update. I got a bit of writer's block after I became fascinated by the Addisam dynamic and the outline to this story started shaping up into something completely different that I originally intended. I had to read several Addek fanfics in order to get to where I was with this story before. I will say that some of my new found love for Addisam might be incorporated, but in the end this will be Addek.

Disclaimer:

I own nothing.

"Trouble Is" - by Allison Iraheta

I could slip so easily into you

If I let myself go

I could let my wildest dream come true

You never know

How it's gonna wind up in the end

Will we be lovers or not even friends?

Trouble is, I like the taste too much and I can't think straight

People change, and will you still be here after today

Trouble is, I feel like I could win or lose it all

I don't know which way to fall

Don't forget, the promises we made

When I got on the plane

We'd be back together once again

And we would stay the same

Sometimes I think love can last

But sometimes I think forever is the thing of the past

Trouble is, I like the taste too much and I can't think straight

People change, and will you still be here after today

Trouble is, I feel like I could win or lose it all

I don't know which way to fall

na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na

Previously on 'Maybe':

"Derek, I just need you to try with her, I need you to really really try. I know it doesn't make sense to you but if you don't try then all of it was for nothing. Don't you get it? It means that you threw our marriage away for nothing! I know I fucked up myself, I slept with your best friend and after you left, as horrible as it sounds, I stayed with him. You know why? Because I needed to know that I didn't ruin our lives together for one night. That's what this would be, any progress and new promises that we made when we decided to try again would have been for nothing. All because of one fuck and black panties." She said louder than she expected as she let go of his hands. He instantly reached out to her.

"Don't, don't pull away from me, please" she allowed him to take a hold of her hands once more, the tension that had taken over her gradually dissipating. Derek slowly loosened his grip on her hands, then reached to wrap his arms around her. She stiffened for a moment and then surrendered herself into his warm embrace. His head moving forward to find hers, she leaned over wanting to feel him closer as well, their foreheads touching, resting against each other intimately.

'Maybe'- by Agent Addek

Chapter 7: 'Trouble Is'

Like every morning, the sunlight that squeaked through her blinds caressed her face. She turned from it, trying to get a few more moments of sleep. The warmth enveloped her body and invited her to stay in bed just a little longer. Soft, slow circles were being drawn on her abdomen. At first, she stiffened, knowing that the hand touching her skin was not her own. Then realization dawned on her and she couldn't help but smile. "Morning." she said as she turned to look at him.

"Morning." he smiled back. "How did you sleep?"

"Really good. How about you?"

"Really good too...Thank you." He grinned sheepishly.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

They held on to each other almost desperately, neither wanted to let go. His hands rubbed her back soothingly and her hands stroked the back of his neck unconsciously. Their foreheads still against each other. Their hearts beat loudly - practically in unison as their breaths deepened. They could feel the air between them change. Derek brought one of his hands up and caressed her face gently. They stared into one another's eyes, no question needed to be asked. They could see the reciprocating love, the want and need in them. He pulled her closer and she obliged instantly. Their lips met, gentle and soft at first, but soon it turned into unabashed desire. Derek guided her to stand up, encircling her waist as he continued to assault her lips. His hands freely roamed her body. "Derek" she whispered his name in between kisses. "Room...now." He quickly grabbed her ass and lifted her as she wrapped her legs around his waist. He walked them out of the nursery and into the hallway, all the while they continued their ferocious onslaught of each others mouths. Addison reached out behind her to open the door. They made their way inside quickly where Derek gently laid her down.

"No...not slow and easy..."

"Addie, I don't want to..."

"You won't. It's fine."

She reached up and pulled him towards her roughly, nipping and sucking his lips. Derek hesitated for a moment, then began his attack on her as well. He reached between them to pull her dress over her, she lifted her hips to assist him. The dress quickly came off and she laid there completely open to him. She looked even more beautiful that he had remembered. Every fiber in him just wanted to plunge into her. He wanted to pin her to the bed and fuck her with his frantic energy. He made a quick attempt at pulling off his pants and boxers as Addison worked on taking off his shirt. Addison's bra and underwear quickly joined the rest of their discarded clothing. She laid back and parted her legs, inviting him to invade her wanton body. Derek seized her breast with his mouth and flicked his tongue over her protruded nipple. Addison arched her back to have more contact. His eyes were addled with so much lust it was driving her to her brink. She knew exactly how he felt because she was feeling it as well. "Derek...now. Do it now." He reached down between them and took his rigid cock in his hand and guided it to her swollen entrance. As he slowly entered her, he unleashed a whimper as her muscles squeezed him tightly. He rested his head in the valley of her breast, breathed in her scent and tried to contain himself. Addison dug her nails into his ass as she willed him to continue, her thighs spread wider to give him more access. Derek groaned against her, then began to pummel her relentlessly. Addison moaned and groaned which encouraged him. Her body was all a buzz with every move he made. She felt alive and whole. Derek couldn't help himself any longer. He wanted to mark his territory, dominate and own her. All he could think about was having her scream his name over and over. He got his wish.

"Derek...oh god...Derek! I want more...please more."

"You want more baby?"

"Yes, yes...oh god yes. Derek...Derek yeah...right...there."

He continued to hammer into her with all that he had, wanting to give her what she wanted. Addison's voice hitched. He felt her spasm around him and that was all he needed. He shot his hot cum without restraint, emptied himself completely inside her. Derek slowed his movements, then stopped altogether, he reached for her and flipped her over to lay on top of him. They were both so sated. The growling of Addison's stomach brought them out of their collective lull.

"Sorry." She said sheepishly. He stroked her back soothingly.

"Someone's hungry."

"Yeah, I guess I am."

"You wanna order in?"

"Sounds good to me."

"Addie?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you too." With that he slipped out of bed. He was on a mission for food.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Addie?" Derek called out to her.

"Yeah?" She answered from the bathroom.

"Do you want to go out for breakfast?"

"Yeah, I'd like that."

"Maybe we can do some shopping after."

"Derek, I think I did enough damage to your credit card yesterday." She chuckled.

"You've got a lot more damage to do, remember we need to buy all the other stuff for the nursery. I got all the furniture, now it's up to you to decorate the room. I'd like to do some of that with you."

"Really?" She asked, peeking her head out around the door.

"I'd love to...if you'll have me."

"Of course, silly."

"Then it's settled. Breakfast first, then some major shopping. Better grab some comfy shoes."

"Already on it!"

The ringing of the door bell rang through the house.

"I'll get it!" Derek yelled, on his way out of the room. He went down the stairs to open the door.

"Naomi, good morning."

"Good morning. Sorry for coming by so early, I wanted to see how things turned out last night. Was she surprised?...happy?"

"Why don't you go ask her yourself, she's up in her room getting ready."

"I will, thanks." She hurried up the stairs. She found Addison putting on her shoes.

"Hey you. How are you feeling?"

"Nai! I'm good...really good."

"How's the nausea?"

"It's been a couple of days since I've had it."

"Dizziness?"

"A little last night, but I'm good."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, it's fine."

"That's good."

"Nai...just ask already."

"What? It's none of my business Addie."

"When has anything that goes on in my life not been your business." She chuckled.

"Right!...Fine just tell me then."

"Why don't I just show you." Addison grabbed Naomi's hand and led her to the nursery.

"Oh my god, Addie! This is gorgeous!"

"I know, right?"

"He did all this yesterday?"

"Yeah, he did. Sam helped him put some of it together."

"This is really fantastic! It just needs your touch and you'll be all set."

"I know. He did really good."

"He really did...so when are you gonna tell me that you slept with him?"

"Wait. How did you...how?"

"Addison Forbes Montgomery! Like I don't know you. So you did?"

"We..."

"Well, you're not denying it."

"We were having an argument...more like a heated discussion...fine, we were talking, I may have yelled a little...then we were sitting here in the nursery and he was holding me and our foreheads were up against each other and next thing you know we're in bed together."

"Just like that...who am I kidding, of course just like that. So, what happens next?."

"Well, we didn't get a chance to work out the details last night, but we will. He's leaving tomorrow evening."

"Are you okay with that?"

"Yes I am. I need him to."

"You need him to leave?"

"No...I mean yes. I told him something crazy, that I may later regret."

"What did you tell him?"

"That I need him to go back and try with Meredith Grey..."

"You what?"

"I told you it was going to sound crazy! I just need to be sure that his declaration of love last night wasn't because he's swept up in all of this."

"He said he loved you?"

"Yes. I told him that I loved him too."

"I don't understand what the problem is? If you're both still in love with each other and want to be together, why would you send him back to go after that girl?"

"I don't want him to have regrets Nai. I need him to be sure and the only way I think he'll get that, is if he goes back and sorts his feelings out for her. He says he doesn't need to, but I can't trust in that. I need to know for sure."

"I understand that Addie, I do, but you have to realize that your entering into murky water here. I don't want you to get hurt."

"I won't. This is really the best way. If he decides that he wants to be with her, then I've lost nothing because I didn't have him to begin with. I moved out to LA to start a new life. If it includes a new life with Derek and our children, then I'd be elated, and if it doesn't, then I'll still have two beautiful precious babies."

"As long as you know what you're doing. I'm here for you no matter what. To me, all that matters is that all three of you..." She points towards Addison's stomach, "...are healthy and taken care of."

"I know Nai and I appreciate that...you do understand why I'm doing it, right?" Addison asked, wanting to be reassured by her friend.

"I may not think it's the best way to go about it, but I understand why you feel you need to do it. Just be careful Addie."

"I will...thanks Nai."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"It's so good to be home!" Addison exclaimed as she dropped the bags at the entrance and plopped down on the couch. "If I never have to do shopping again, it will be a day too soon."

"I never thought the day would come when I'd actually hear you say that." Derek replied as he dropped his bags and sat next to her. "I think we got everything you'll need for the first few months."

"You think? Seriously, I think we went a little crazy...I mean considering I'm still in my first trimester and..."

"Addison, stop. We're allowed to be happy and enjoy this. Besides, Naomi is monitoring you throughout this pregnancy and I'm sure you will be doing everything you can to help it along. So just take it in, let it wash over you. You're going to be a mother, we're having two beautiful, healthy babies coming into our lives soon."

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to...I guess I'm always expecting for the other shoe to drop. I'm not used to being this happy without something going terribly wrong." She took a deep breath and then shook herself out of it. "You're right. I get to be happy about this. I get to enjoy decorating the room and getting ready for them to arrive...thank you."

"You're welcome!" He smiled at her genuinely. They stared at each other for a few moments, allowing it to envelope them. Addison was the first to break eye contact, not wanting to get too comfortable with their current situation. The truth was, that Derek had to go back to Seattle...back to a life that didn't include her or their twins. They still had so much to discuss and go over, and the sooner they had that conversation, the better.

"I'm gonna head upstairs to change, then I'll meet you back down here. Would you mind bringing the shopping bags up to the nursery?"

"Of course not...Addie, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"It just seems...never mind, I'll take these up."

She quickly rushed up the steps, leaving Derek confused. He wasn't going to push her. When she was ready to talk, she would. He gathered the bags and then made his trek up the stairs.

As soon as she walked into her room, she shut the door and then leaned up against it. Addison took a few breaths trying to compose herself. She couldn't lose it now, they had to have the conversation that he had flown all the way out here for. Just because they had fallen into bed together again didn't change anything. He still had to go. She closed her eyes, then took another breath. She quickly changed into something comfortable and then went back down.

Derek was already in the kitchen brewing some tea. "Chamomile or lavender?"

"Chamomile's good. Thanks."

"You're welcome. Now go sit down and I'll bring it over to you." At Addison's slight glare, "I just think you'd want to be off your feet since we were out most of the day." He smiled.

Addison smiled back softly, then continued onto the couch. She reached over to grab one of her warm fuzzy blankets. "Why don't we take this outside? It's nice out."

"That sounds great, I'll meet you out there in a bit." She nodded and made her way outside.

Back inside, Derek was getting his tray set up with blueberry scones, biscottis and some honey for their tea. He looked around, grabbed a few final things, then padded out to the deck. Addison was already curled up in one of the lounge chairs, her eyes closed, allowing herself to feel the gentle ocean breeze caress her face. She looked so peaceful that he almost didn't want to disturb her. Addison felt his presence and opened her eyes.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to..."

"It's fine."

"You just looked so relaxed, I didn't want to bother you."

"Don't worry, you didn't. Here, let me help you with that..." She began to get up.

"No, it's okay. I've got it Addie. I'm just gonna set it right here on this table." He pointed to the table that was off to the side. He dragged it over to sit between them. "I figured you might want something to nibble on while you drank your tea." He motioned to the items on the tray.

"I do. Thank you. This looks great!" They were silent for several moments, neither of them knowing where to go from here.

"Derek..." He instantly knew where this was going.

"I know...I know. I just wanted to have these few days with you, where nothing else mattered but us and them." He pointed at her stomach.

"I know, I did too, but we can't kid ourselves Derek. You have a life that you need to get back to, and so do I."

"Addison, I told you..."

"I know, but I also told you that I couldn't do this...not without knowing for sure."

"I can't say anything to convince you otherwise?"

"I'm sorry, there isn't." She said deflated. "Believe me Derek, every part of me is screaming for me to tell you to stay. To just hold on to this, to us, and never let go, but I can't. I can't for so many reasons...but mainly for their sake, my sake and yours."

"So what happens when I get back? Will I get updates? Will I get to come with you to appointments? How much will you let me be involved?"

"Yes of course. You can be involved as much, or as little, as you want to be. I just really want you to know that you don't owe me...us...anything. If at some point you no longer want to be involved, please know that even if it hurts...I'll understand." She looked down towards her hands, not wanting to see his face for fear that she would see relief.

"Are you kidding me? Addison...look at me please!" She looked up and met his intense gaze. "I know I haven't given you any reason to believe me when I say this, but I said it before and I'll say it again. I'm in this all the way. No ifs, ands or buts about it. Please know and understand that!"

"Okay." She nodded with relief,and then paused before she asked her next question. She really didn't want to know the answer, but she had to ask him. "Are you going to tell her?" She didn't have to say her name, he knew exactly who Addison was asking about.

"I don't know."

"Don't you think she'll get suspicious when you're making all these trips to Los Angeles?"

"What I meant to say, is that I don't know that it'll be any of her business." Addison arched an inquiring eyebrow at him. "I know you want me to go back and make it work with her to ease some of the doubts you have, but that's not up to you. I will go back to Seattle to give you your space and time to think, but I don't feel that given everything that's happened, that Meredith and I should be together."

"But..."

"I understand what it is you want Addie, but I may not be able to give you that. Things are different now...and not just because you're pregnant. Being here with you, even when we've argued, has still been so easy and simple, like it's the most natural thing in the world. With her, it's never been like that, it's a constant battle."

"We weren't always easy Derek, that's why things...happened."

"I know that, but we also stopped trying Addie. We lost each other along the way but I never stopped loving you. Was I hurt? Absolutely. Did I want to make you pay for the pain that you caused me? Every day. What I realized, was that I wouldn't have been so hurt and angry if I didn't care so damn much about you! I honestly don't know what's gonna happen when I get back Addie, I just know that whatever it is that's happening with you and these babies, I want to be a part of it. Okay?"

"Okay"

Everything's so temporary.

Hold too tight and things just slip away.

And then you hold me I'm in place

Trouble is, I like the taste too much and I can't think straight

People change, and will you still be here after today

Trouble is, I feel like I could win or lose it all

I don't know which way to fall

na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na

I don't know which way to fall