True Love Way

Chapter 18

I woke with fingers running through my hair. My neck was insanely stiff, and my lower back was in spasm. I needed to move, but the hair-play was just too enticing.

"The night nurse was just in," Bella said softly. "She was going to kick you out. I wouldn't let her."

"Good. I don't think I can move," I mumbled. One shoulder and my head rested on Bella's raised bed. The rest of me was in a chair not meant for sleeping. I became aware of the pins and needles in my left arm ,and a whimper came out as I attempted to shift it.

"You slept well," she stated, still combing through my hair.

I grunted as I attempted to straighten myself. My head was turned away from Bella, and I desperately needed to see her. "And you? How are you feeling?"

She shrugged casually. "I have drugs. You must be sore."

In no position to lie, I nodded as I pulled myself upright and rubbed at my neck with the only hand that was of use at the moment. The other hung limply at my side, every nerve ending firing up and blasting me with pain. "Not the best position to crash in. Have you been awake long?"

"A while. I was thinking of reading a bit, but I didn't want to turn the light on and disturb you."

She amazed me. Just hours after another major surgery, she was still putting someone else ahead of her own desires. "Reading anything good?"

"I don't know yet. I brought two new ones – a romance and a thriller. Didn't know what I'd feel like."

We continued making small talk while I worked out some of the kinks in my stiff muscles. I was dying to know what she'd wanted to tell me so badly, both before surgery and after, but she didn't bring it up. I put it down to the drugs being pumped into her and dismissed it being of any great importance. When the nurse came back to change her dressings, I went for a walk. After chatting with a few members of staff that I knew, I ended up heading for the nursery. I wanted to see if the little wonder still looked as charming as I'd remembered.

Through the glass window, I spotted Rosalie and Emmett off to the side. I watched them for a few moments with their new son. They both looked exhausted, but the elation on their faces more than made up for any dark circles under their eyes. They'd never looked happier. My eyes scanned the other babies lined up in their little beds. None impressed me. I left the window and headed around the corner to the door of the nursery. As I rounded the corner, I heard my sister speaking quietly. Not wanting to intrude on a private moment, I stopped.

"You honestly don't think we have anything to worry about?"

"I just don't see it, no," Emmett responded in a similar hushed tone. "You see the way she looks at him. Do you honestly think she's just going to take off?"

Initially, I felt like an ass for listening to their conversation at all. Something told me to stay, however. I had a feeling that their talk involved Bella. Were they worried she was going to take the baby back?

"It would kill him if she did. He's so involved, and I know his heart. Edward has never stopped caring about her. It has to have all come back for him. Em, I'm scared for my brother. What if he never moves on?"

I felt the beginning twinges of anger – the same way I'd felt when Jasper had accused Bella of taking advantage of me. I thought my sister knew better. Bella had just made their dream come true, and they thought she'd walk out on me? On all of us? I was about to barge in when I heard Emmett begin to speak again.

"Baby, what if he is moving on – moving forward? They used to be so close. You've said yourself that he's never had a friendship with anyone like he had with Bella. So, what if that's changing now? A lot of time has passed. It could all be different for them. It could be great."

"And if he gets hurt?"

"He's stronger than you give him credit for, Rosie. I know you love him, and you worry about him, but you don't see him the way I do. Edward's not this fragile little kid who will fall apart under pressure. You should have seen him tonight. He was the only one of us keeping it together when you were in there with Bella. Honestly."

"I've always known how strong my brother is," Rosalie countered. "He's stronger than any of us. I would've crumbled if I had to deal with the things he's had to, but he goes on. And I have a feeling we haven't even seen the tip of what he deals with on his own. Everything's been a struggle for him, and I just want to see that end. He shouldn't have to struggle for love, Em. He has so much to offer. I want to protect his heart."

"I think he turned a corner long ago, and he's approaching another one. Just let him go. Let him see where he's going, and if Bella goes with him… perfect."

I heard my sister huff. "Why are you always right?"

And Emmett's laugh. "Why is this the first time you've acknowledged that?"

"You were right about this, too. You always said we'd stumble into our own bit of happiness somehow. And here he is." Their words faded into soft murmurs. I assumed they had now moved on to talking about the baby. This was good because I was more than a little shocked by their conversation. Rosalie thought I was strong? "Edward thinks he's perfect."

"Well, he would, wouldn't he? He's the most observant guy I've ever known. Uncle Edward thinks you're perfect! And so do I! And, as Mommy just said… Daddy's always right!"

This was my opportunity to make a move. I could either turn around and pretend I'd never been there, or act like I'd just arrived. It was times like these when I could hear Aro's voice clear as day in my mind: 'You always have a choice, Edward.'

"That sounds good coming from your mouth," I joked, slapping Emmett on the back as I walked up behind them. "'Daddy's always right.' How are the proud parents?"

"Tired," they both said with a laugh.

"Mom and Dad were here. Charlie took them back to your apartment, so I guess you're on the couch unless you want to go to our place. I'm staying here tonight." Rose had never looked happier as she sat holding her new son.

"Me too." To avoid any hint of pity in her look – if there was one – I bent over to take my second look at the baby. It was impossible not to smile at him. If anything, his charm had grown. "Did you trim his nails yet? They looked long. He could scratch himself. His eyes are open now. What if he scratches his eye?"

My sister smirked at me. "Do you want to hold him, Edward?"

I straightened up, wearing a frown. "No. That's okay."

"Is Bella awake? I went to see her about an hour ago, and both of you were out cold."

I grinned at Emmett for the subject change. "Yeah. She's awake. She was asking for you earlier."

"Yeah?" Rosalie smiled up at me. "Think she can handle all of us at once, or should we go in singly?"

~ 0 ~

"Hey, little Baby Momma." Emmett came in first, wearing his most brilliant smile.

I'd gone back to the room to check with Bella before they brought the baby in. I wasn't sure if she was ready to see him. They must have sensed the problem, because Rosalie hung back to change the baby while Emmett visited first.

"Are you too sore for a hug?"

"Never!" Bella smiled brightly at him and held her arms out. "You look so happy, Em."

"And you look like an angel," he replied as he embraced her. "You are an angel. How are you feeling?"

"I've felt worse," she quipped. "Where's the rest of your family?"

Emmett's smile grew even broader. "Diaper change. They'll be along. God… I still can't believe this is happening. Months ago we were worried for your life, and now you're looking better than ever and we have a son! I keep thinking it can't be real. Pinch me."

"Don't encourage her, man. You have no idea what you're in store for." Bella and I exchanged a look and broke out in laughter. Even Emmett didn't stand a chance against Bella's toes.

Emmett helped Bella prop herself up to dose herself with pain meds when the laughter got too intense for her stomach, and I noticed Rose waiting. I waved her in. She passed Emmett the baby and went to Bella at once. Even before a word was spoken, both women were in tears as they hugged fiercely. I stood there like an oaf, not knowing what the tears were for, nor how to make them stop.

Bella was the first to manage words. "Thank you," she squeaked out. "Thank you for doing this."

My sister clenched her eyes closed, shaking her head. "No, no, no, honey. We are indebted to you. You've given us more than we'd ever hoped for. He's beautiful. You're beautiful, Bella. Do you know how special you are to do this? Right from the start, you were doing something so amazing. You've trusted us with something so precious, and I swear to you – I. Swear. To. You. – We will cherish him each and every day and remember what a beautiful person you are for giving us the chance to do that."

While Rose became more and more composed as she talked, Bella lost it, increasing my feeling of uselessness. Emmett made an empathetic face in my direction, so I backed off and let my sister handle it.

"I'm sorry, sweetie," she apologized softly, holding Bella as she did. "I don't want to make you upset. We only wanted you to know how much you mean to us. How grateful we are. You did so good. So, so good with this baby. You came through the surgery brilliantly, and you're doing so well. He's healthy and absolutely beautiful." She looked directly at me with a smirk when she said, "And Edward says he's perfect."

Of all the unintentional things I'd uttered in my life that never got dropped, this was one I didn't regret. It didn't make me feel silly or unintelligent. It made me feel… I don't know. It was something I'd never felt before. It was kind of like when Bella would grip my shirt with her hands when she needed me close to her. Or how I felt when she'd tell me I'd made her feel better. I didn't feel embarrassed about it until I saw the look on Rose's face when Bella announced I'd said similar to her. Seeing my discomfort, Rose let me off the hook.

"Well, would you care to meet him face-to-face? You already know him better than anyone, but he's nice to look at too." She smiled as she slid off the side of the bed where she'd sat, giving Bella a view of Emmett proudly holding the baby.

"Want to hold him, Baby Momma?"

Bella sucked in her bottom lip. "You're gonna have to come up with a new name, Em. That's Rosalie now."

"You're right, Angel."

"Emmett…" Bella covered her face in embarrassment.

"Angella? Bellangel? We'll play with it. See which one works. In the meantime, here he is. Sleeping – sorry. He should be awake for your first meeting."

"Sure. Now, he sleeps!" Bella accepted the sleeping, bundled baby and stared down at him. "Wow. How did he fit inside of me?" she mused aloud before admiring him in silence.

None of us spoke, wanting to give Bella her own time with the baby she grew for another couple. I could see her struggling with her emotions, but I had no idea what she could possibly be feeling. How could anyone know what she was feeling?

"Have you named him?" she asked quietly.

Rose looked to Emmett and gave him a nod.

"Bella, meet Nathan," he announced with pride. "The name means 'a gift from God', and he surely is."

Bella smiled down at the little gift and repeated his name. "Nathan McCarty. You are one fortunate and very loved little boy. Always know that."

Her words struck me hard. I turned away as I felt the wetness on my cheeks. I wondered if those were her own feelings about him or if they were for my benefit. Was she thinking of what I'd said months ago about never wanting a child to feel as I had? Would he always know how valued he was? Or did my lack of self-worth stem from something else other than an unusual birth? I couldn't imagine parents showing me any more love than mine had. This little wonder… Nathan… he would receive the same, and more. Had my parents said anything remotely similar to me the first time they held me? Or was their fear transferred into me? I prayed Nathan would never fear anything. I prayed he heard Bella's words and buried them deep inside so if a day ever came where he felt alone, he would somehow know he wasn't.

"Bella? We wanted to ask you something."

I dried my cheeks one more time and turned back to them at the sound of my sister's voice.

"We wanted to give him something from his birth parents –"

"But there's no male form of 'Isabella,'" Emmett quipped.

"Instead, we'd like to name him Nathan Marcus Gianni McCarty. Would that be all right with you?"

Bella nodded adamantly as tears streamed down her cheeks. "It's perfect. Yes. Thank you."

"I wanted 'Izzy' in there somewhere," Emmett added. "You should be represented."

Chuckling, Bella shook her head. "Ugh! No. He's got a long enough name. Don't torture him with more. It's perfect as it is. Right, Nathan?"

"He'll respond when he wakes up," Emmett joked.

"Which should be soon. It's almost feeding time." Rose checked her watch before peeking down at her sleeping son.

"The nurse put some milk in the nursery for him," Bella announced. She dropped her head shyly. "I don't know if you want to use it, but I didn't want to waste it in case you did."

My sister choked on a sob, and the tears started anew. "Bella! I wanted to ask you, but I didn't know how… I didn't want to presume… and I don't want you doing more than you already have –"

"It's fine. I can express. If that's what you want to do." Bella wiped at her own tears. "I'd agreed to do that for Gianna. I'd do it for you." Her voice was soft and reflective, almost inaudible.

I pulled my chair up close to her bed when the others left for the nursery. This had to renew her mourning over her friends' untimely death. "This must be difficult for you," I commented gently.

"I did the right thing," she whispered before looking over at me. "He and I survived for a reason. Right?"

Any other time, I would have lost it entirely. I believed that with all my heart, because if she hadn't survived, I would be utterly lost. I needed a second chance with her. Nathan needed a second chance at life and loving, capable parents. And Bella needed me to be strong for her through it all. "Yes, Bella. I think all of this happened for a reason. I think you've done amazingly well with everything. I also think your friends would approve."

"I know they would." She smiled sadly. "They would love all of you. I wish I hadn't… I wish you could have known them. If I hadn't shut everyone out… kept them separate…"

"Shhh, you can't change the past. We can only move forward." I used Emmett's profound words, because once again, he'd made a huge difference in my outlook for the future.

~ 0 ~

The next three days until Bella's release were hectic. I kept my normal work shifts and stayed with Bella at night. During the day, she had Charlie, Rosalie and Emmett, as well as my parents, all taking turns between her and Nathan. Bella commented that my parents treated her as though she'd never been gone. They would, of course, because they were like that. I made arrangements to switch with Ben for the following week, when I was supposed to do third shift. Bella's only request of me was that I stay with her at night. Particularly once she was home. It gave me hope. Not only did she want me sleeping with her, but she still referred to my apartment as 'home.'

I was disappointed that I couldn't be the one taking her home myself. I had just picked up my first call at work when the text from Bella came through telling me her OB had just discharged her. I knew it was going to be today – she was having no residual problems with her kidneys thanks to the dialysis after surgery, and she was well practiced in surgical recovery. She was itching to get home, but I'd secretly hoped that her OB would be delayed. All day.

Instead of escorting Bella out of the hospital, and carrying her up the stairs to the apartment, I climbed them alone. I could hear the chatter coming from inside even before I opened the door. It sounded like the whole team was there. Then it was like a receiving line – they all jumped to attention and rushed for the door, giving me their greetings, instructions for Bella and dinner, and goodbyes in a such a jumble I didn't catch much of it at all.

"What the hell was that?" I asked, wide-eyed as the door closed behind me.

Bella grinned from her spot on the couch. "I asked them to give us some quiet time. I hope it wasn't presumptuous. Maybe you wanted to spend more time with your parents?"

"No! I mean, I would, yeah. But this is better. This is good. Charlie?"

"Staying at Rosalie and Emmett's tonight. With your parents."

I made an impressed face and then began torturing myself with the motive behind clearing everyone out. Was she sick of them? Of me? Were we too overbearing for her? Or did she simply want some time alone – with me? The cheer from that thought quickly vanished when I wondered if she wanted the bed to herself, thus evicting Charlie from the spare room.

Bella watched my rapidly changing expressions with curiosity and amusement.

Clearing my throat, I kicked into gear. I'd been frozen in place long enough. "Okay. Dinner? Someone said something about it, but I didn't quite catch it."

"The plates are already prepared – warming in the oven. You just have to pull them out. With gloves, your mom said."

I rolled my eyes as she snickered. "I should be a brat and call her up to ask what to do for a burn."

"She'd see through it, silly. You'd know what to do as well as she would. Her old nursing skills will come in handy for me when you're at work though. Hey, can you help me up?"

"You can stay there. I'll bring your dinner to you."

She huffed, waving her hands at me to pull her up. "I want to eat like a normal person. Please?"

Smiling, I took both of her hands and then guided her to the small table by the balcony. Low chairs would be easier for her than the bar stools we normally used at the breakfast bar. I brought our plates over – using gloves – and she filled me in on what everyone had planned for her care. Charlie would be leaving in two days, but my mom was staying with Rose so she could be around to help out everyone.

"I also got a call from the lawyer today. The estate has been settled. They have very little family – no one close. As I said, there's already a trust fund set up for the baby, so Nathan will be set later in life. The hospital bills and everything came out of their funds. That was part of the deal we had when I agreed to carry their baby. They would take care of all the medical bills – apparently that included the accident."

I hadn't even thought about bills or where the payments had come from. "That's good then. It must be reassuring to know they thought ahead that way."

Bella nodded, deep in thought. She swirled the pasta on her plate around, not looking very interested in it. "I knew they thought ahead for the baby. What I didn't expect was to be left with the remainder."

I quirked an eyebrow her way, stilling my fork as it made its way to my mouth. I was starving, myself. "Wow. They named you executor?"

"Not exactly," she mumbled. "Recipient. Sole recipient."

I set my fork down, clearing my throat. "You don't seem happy about that."

She lifted her eyes to me, clearly struggling. "It's just so unexpected! I know they weren't close with any family members, but surely they would want Nathan to have everything. I can't… I don't want to take it."

Resting my elbows on either side of my plate, I rested my chin on my hands. I spoke calmly, hoping to soothe her. "I would think they knew what they were doing, Bella. I'm certain that they knew you would be sure Nathan was well taken care of."

She nodded, still frowning. "I'm grateful, don't get me wrong. It's been a relief to know I'm getting top medical care without having to worry about expenses. And I'm not exactly employed anywhere." She finally gave up with her food and set her fork aside. "It makes me feel like an employee. Someone they paid off to carry their baby."

It was my turn to frown. "Nothing about the way you described the situation sounds remotely like it was a paid position. It sounds more to me like they thought of you as family. You said much the same yourself."

"Sure… they were like family. But I never took money from them. I only moved into their house because they wanted to be part of the whole experience. I wasn't doing it for money or a place to stay, or for any reason other than to give back some of what they gave to me." She groaned in frustration. "See? That makes it sound like it was a job or an obligation, and it wasn't! Marcus helped me get my books published. Gianna… well, she was more of an emotional anchor for me. She was everything my own mother should have been but wasn't. It was never about taking anything from them materially. It's different now. By taking their money, I'm paid for services rendered," she said bitterly.

I released a heavy sigh. I could partially understand her feelings about it but not completely. They were gone, and they obviously thought enough of her to name her in their will. I didn't see the problem with accepting it. "Is it that you think you're taking money from Nathan?"

She shrugged. "His trust fund is set up two-tiered. There are funds available for his needs at any time and then a lump sum when he turns eighteen. Like I said, he is taken care of financially. I guess I'm worried that I'm taking advantage. I don't have a job. I don't have immediate plans. What if I stagnate? I could end up living off my friends' misfortune. What kind of life is that?"

"Think of it as starting over," I suggested with an understanding smile. "Take your time to heal and then decide what it is you want to do. This way there's no pressure on you, and ultimately, you'll do what's right for you. You always do."

Her eyes flashed at me in horror. "I do not! I do anything but!"

Immediately I wished I'd kept my yap shut. "Fuck. That didn't come out right. What I meant was, the decisions you make are always for the best. You do what you think is right, and it works." Even as I was restating my thought, it still didn't sound flattering. "Okay, I'll try again. I know you'll do what's right, because you're kind and you think things through. You don't act rashly or out of desperation. You just need time."

"Edward…" She dropped her head into her hands. "You have no idea how much time I've already spent thinking through things that I never act on. It's been a huge part of my life. In a way, I've been stagnating for a decade. Gianna and Marcus wanted more for me." Tears slowly rolled down her cheeks now, tugging at my heart. "I feel like they've given me every opportunity to set a goal and reach it, and I'm still letting them down."

I gave up on my dinner with one regretful last look at it. Slipping off my chair, I knelt beside hers and reached for her hand. "What is it you want, Bella?" I asked softly. "Name one goal, and I swear I'll do everything in my power to help you reach it. We'll get you there, together."

Bella stared at me incredulously, and I realized my mistake.

"I don't mean you have to stay here… with me. Of course, you can. If you want to. I'd love to have you –" I squeezed my eyes shut, willing my mouth to do the same. A muttered "fuck" still managed to come out. So much for me starting over with her – acting like a man instead of a lovesick kid. After a few deep breaths, I finally looked at her. She wore the same patient expression she always used to have when she was giving me time to sort my thoughts or collect my emotions. She was waiting for me to get it right.

"My knees are killing me. Can we go sit comfortably?"

The sound of Bella's laugh made all of my tension vanish. It also made my hunger return. I grabbed our plates off the table, and we ate in silent comfort on the couch.

~ 0 ~

"I should go back to Phoenix," Bella said quietly when I returned from rinsing off our dinner plates.

I wanted to scream out or throw a tantrum. Instead, I took a seat next to her and calmly prepared myself to lose her. "You want to go back?"

"No. I don't want to, but I have to. I need to deal with this and move on."

My nerves uncoiled ever so slightly. "It's a temporary thing then?"

She nodded. "Definitely. I have to see the lawyer about the estate, and I want to say goodbye to all the memories there so we can all move on."

I shifted to face her. "All?"

"I've been a burden to so many people, and I need to put an end to that. I have to let people move on when and however they need to."

I held my hand up to stop her going any further. "Hold up. I have a feeling I know where you're going with this."

"You do?" Her eyes were wide – almost fearful. Yet deep within, a glimmer of hopefulness was there as well.

I grinned at her. "I do. You're anything but a burden here, Bella. Know that. I'm happy to have you stay here for however long you please." I stared at her nibbling on her bottom lip. Sadness replaced the hope that was there. "Unless you don't want to… oh my god. I'm sorry. I'm putting pressure on you to stay, and I can tell by your expression, it's the last thing you want to do, but now I've thrown that out there, and you don't want to hurt me so you'll do whatever… say whatever… just to –"

"Edward, stop!" Her hands held my face, forcing me to look at her. "You're wrong about that. You've never put pressure on me to do anything. Never once." A tiny smile curled up her lips. "I was referring to my family. I burdened my family – held them back."

"I don't understand…"

"Kate, I mean. She took me in when Mom sold Gran's house. I meant to help them out somehow, as they were helping me. But I was useless. So needy. I took Kate's time away from Tanya and Garrett. I ditched the job Garrett had so kindly arranged for me. Kate has been giving and giving and giving to me… most of my life! From the time my parents split – all but those two years in Forks with Dad – she's felt responsible for me. I've held her back. She wanted to go to New York for college. Instead, she stayed in Phoenix. For me. By the time I left, Gran got sick, so they didn't have a chance to do what they wanted then either.

"Kate gave up at least two promotions in the time I've been living with them. Two that I'm aware of. There may have been more. She's always wanted to teach college – she's stuck in sixth grade in Phoenix… because of me. That's why I turned to Marcus and Gianna. I wanted Kate and Garrett to see that I could handle things on my own. They could tend to Tanya and their own wants without worrying about me. Instead, I made them worry more."

"People do worry when they care, Bella. There's no way around that," I commented gently. "That's something I can relate to completely. From both sides."

The fret lines fell from her face as she finally smiled. "You've always been so easy to talk to. You just understand."

"I understand sacrifice, too." The words were out before I could stop them. I'd made the ultimate sacrifice out of love for my brother, and for Bella. Knowing that I'd loved her all along wouldn't help her to feel like less of a burden. I quickly recovered to avoid the mess of having to explain that. "We've all done things for our family based on love, not just obligation. You did it yourself when you left Forks to be with Gran, right? I also think that if Kate has been willing to give up the things she wanted to do for the sake of family, the last thing she would want is for you to feel bad about it." I paused to give her a reassuring smile. "It would probably be good for both of you to clear the air on that. What I saw of you together looked like it was something really special. You don't want to give up that kind of relationship with a family member, Bella."

Her smile was huge now. "You're right. Of course." She laughed a little as she swatted my shoulder. "Why are you always right?" It wasn't so much a question as it was a musing. "I want to repay you for the past three months of mooching off you. The extra food and electricity. And if you weren't paid for all the time you took off since the accident, I'll cover those days too."

"No." I pulled away from her and shook my head firmly. "No way."

"I'm not living off of you, Edward!" she protested. "I'm not going to take advantage of you."

"You're not!" I argued back. "Exactly how much do you think I'm out of pocket from groceries? Every day of work that I've missed has been paid for, and there's still more I can take. I haven't taken a proper vacation in… well, never! And I'm the guy everyone goes to when they need a shift covered because I'm the guy with no fucking life!" My voice raised an octave on the last words as my temper peaked. I took a moment to let it simmer down. "I will not take money from you," I stated quietly. "Services rendered? Ring a bell? You don't think that's exactly how I would feel?"

She nodded, with tears and remorse in her eyes. She wiped away at them quickly. "I'm sorry. I should know that." Looking down at her hands as she twisted them anxiously, she suddenly snickered. "God, we're so much alike."

"Stubborn idiots," I muttered, not seeing the humour she apparently did.

"With no life," she added softly. "I've been exactly the same. I work at the school more than any other staff member, and I'm not even on staff!"

Okay, there was some humour after all. I joined her laughter until she gripped her stomach. The laughter was too much for her so soon after surgery. I made her comfortable on the couch, and we scanned through Netflix to find a movie to watch. Comedies were out, as were horrors or anything sad. After an hour of searching, we gave up.

I eyed my bed with anticipation as Bella claimed the bathroom. Stripping down to my t-shirt and boxers, I climbed in and waited for her. She was in there a long time. I was debating going to check on her when I heard her call out for me. Out of bed in a flash, I ran.

Outside the bathroom door, I called through, "Bella? You all right?"

"Um… yeah. No. I uh… can you come in?"

Tentatively, I opened the door, keeping my eyes down. Her voice sounded like it was coming from the bathtub. That would mean she was…

"I'm stuck. This was really stupid of me. Your mom said she'd help me with this in the morning – I should've just waited, but there's a lot of… God, you don't want to know this. I need to shut up. I need to get out. I'm freezing!"

I tried to draw out the paramedic in me. This was not a gorgeous woman naked in my bathtub; this was a victim in need of rescue. I grabbed a thick towel and moved towards the tub. "Here. Can you dry yourself? I'll get your robe." I stuck the towel around the shower curtain, passing it off to her without looking. Her robe wasn't hanging in the bathroom, but mine was. It would do the trick. Better, in fact, because it was bigger.

Her teeth were chattering as she dried off. "O-k-k-kay. Got the r-r-r-robe?"

I smiled and passed it through.

"And I need… my stuff. Over there. My panties, and…"

I saw the pad lying out with her panties. I grabbed them up together and passed them through. "Let me know when it's all clear."

She tugged on the curtain after a bit and grimaced with the movement. "C-clear."

Drawing the curtain fully open for her, I was all business. "Okay. Can you climb out with help, or should I lift you? How did you get in?"

"I sat. And turned. It's too cold now. And I'm sore."

I nodded calmly. "Okay. Lifting it is. Put your arms around my neck." I bent to scoop her up. She was much lighter than the previous time I'd carried her up the stairs this way. And she smelled so fucking good as she clung to me. I begged my lower extremities to cooperate – my legs could not weaken now, and my dick had better not decide to lend a hand, so to speak. Standing there in my underwear and my arms full of Bella, there would be no way to tuck and hide. Why did she have to smell this way?

"I'm glad you're in dispatch."

"Huh?" Her remark caught me off guard. I'd almost forgotten she was just as alert as I was.

"I'd bet women would intentionally put themselves in danger, just to have you rescue them this way. I'd spend your whole shift wondering who was in your arms."

I smirked at her as I carried her through to the bedroom. "My luck it would be a 300 pound man in adult diapers. Emmett would forever razz me about that." In the very back of my mind, the possibility hit – she could really be jealous? I locked it away there. It was a dangerous thought.

She grinned at me shyly as I set her down on the bed.

"Your hair is still dripping. Got that towel?" I gathered her hair and wrapped the towel around the length, squeezing the excess water out.

"I guess taking a shower was a dumb idea all around. It'll take hours to dry."

I gave it one more squeeze before pulling the towel away. "Be right back." I returned with her hair dryer and brush. She watched me plug it into the wall by the bed with a grin. "Okay… how will we do this?"

"There's a button. It says 'on'," she quipped.

I scowled at her before setting it down on her nightstand. I climbed over her and urged her to turn around before I picked it up again. She sat cross-legged, and I knelt behind her, carefully brushing out any tangles before using the button she so helpfully pointed out. I spent a good twenty minutes drying it, and it was still damp when she waved at me to stop.

"We're going to burn it out. And you're putting me to sleep." For effect, she collapsed back against me. Her head rested on my shoulder. "Your arms must be sore," she mumbled sleepily. "I can't make you keep at it."

I was running my fingers through her hair as she spoke, drawing it all to the side. It left her neck exposed and looking positively delectable. Swallowing hard, I spoke softly against her ear. "I don't mind, you know." My eyes roamed back to her long neck, and I don't know what came over me, but I dipped my head and kissed her there. Not once, not twice, but three soft kisses down her neck. If my robe hadn't stopped me, I may have continued along her shoulder as well.

Her body shivered against me, and I moved away quickly. I went to the dresser and extracted my favourite blue nightie for her to put on. If I hadn't done it right then, I wouldn't have been able to leave the bed without embarrassing myself. My lower body was no longer able to cooperate. It would soon be very evident. As it was, a slight readjustment was necessary while my back was to the bed. Holding the gown in front of me as I returned helped me out as well.

She tugged it over her head and I turned away to give her privacy to remove my robe. She was shivering again when I got in bed next to her.

"The heat from the dryer felt so good. Relaxing. Now I'm cold again."

"I'm pretty warm over here," I quipped, with no joke truly intended. I felt incredibly warm. Too warm. I kicked a foot out from under the covers to get some air just as Bella slid over, curling up next to me. Her skin didn't feel cold next to mine, but her whole body was trembling.

"You are warm. Nice," she mumbled against my shoulder.

All I could think of was kissing her neck. Her only reaction had been to shiver. She hadn't pulled away or acted shocked, but she didn't comment on it either. Surely, if I had been way out of line with it, she wouldn't be nestled so close now. She would be hugging the other side of the mattress. I shifted to slide my arm under her so she could get even closer… if she wanted to. She did. Now what? I wanted more than ever to kiss her – really kiss her. But she was four days post-partum. Was it too soon? It's not like I was going to have sex with her… Shit. It really wasn't the time to think about having sex with Bella. No. Not the time.

But I had kissed her in a more affectionate way than we'd ever exchanged before. Was she expecting more? Was she waiting for me to remark on it? Did she think I'd freak out if she kissed me? Exhaling heavily to clear the Bella scent that was making my mind swirl with wicked thoughts, I stroked her arm gently.

I should say something to break the silence. It's a weird moment. I should say, or do… something.

"It's supposed to rain for the next few days."

Bella convulsed in another fit of shivers at the mere mention of more dampness. I was beginning to sweat. My other foot untangled itself from the blankets and joined the first unbound foot. Better.

"I guess you don't want a weather report," I acknowledged quietly. "Was that weird for you? The kisses, not my report. I don't want to make you uncomfortable – I just really wanted to do that. I've wanted to for so long. Soooo long. You mean so much to me, Bella. I want you to know that. You should know that I'll be anything you want me to be, and that I'll be your friend no matter what. You'd tell me if I crossed the line, right? If those kinds of kisses are too much?" I held my breath waiting for her response. There was silence.

"Bella?"

A tiny, soft little snort broke the silence as she snuggled in even closer. Her warm breath on my neck fell into the familiar rhythm I was well accustomed to. She was asleep. I smiled as I placed a kiss on the top of her head.

"Goodnight, sweet Bella. I'm so glad you're here. Sleep well."