I'm a dog, the damn Devil Fruit turned me into a dog.

Not one of those big, tough, intimidating, vicious looking dogs either. No, I turned into one of the GOOFIEST LOOKING FUCKING DOGS I'VE EVER SEEN!

I mean come on, really!? I had to go over the misfortune of being forced to eat the fruit but I'm given the weirdest looking animal ever? You'd think I could catch a break.

long nose, long body, tiny legs, and big floppy ears are an awful combination for a dog; I look ridiculous.

Not only that but I've been mistaken as a dog-shocker!- and been taken in by a different group of pirates. At least it's not the same group as before and for that I'm grateful; hope those ingrates are next for the executioners block if they haven't gone already.

On top of that, the blue-nosed bear looking thing saved my life from bleeding out with his medical skills, because he already wasn't odd enough the bear apparently needed to be a doctor.

Sitting silently outside their door I continued to listen in on their little conversation about me.

"We should have someone with him at all times so he doesn't rip his stitches again like this morning," Chopper said seriously.

Ussop cringed at the memory, "Yeah, that wasn't pretty at all."

Like I needed to be reminded about panicking while trying to change back; it was a traumatizing experience in itself. Confusion, panic, and being mute weren't ideal factors to wake up to. I doubt I need to explain anyfurther.

Nami rose an eyebrow at this new piece of info, "How'd he manage that?"

Chopper just shook his head, "I don't know, I was out of the room for a second and suddenly I hear him heaving and whining." The bear glanced outside at me for what felt like the hundredth time, "I wish I could speak to him but he can hardy make a sound. I don't even think he'll be able to bark again." He said sadly.

The slight pity in his tone annoyed me but it's not like I could say anything about it. Lowering down to my belly, I laid down and continued to listen in on their conversation.

"GAAAAARGGgg-cchoooo!"

My ears twitched at the sudden noise and I threw my paws over my head at the now ongoing music of drowning trumpets that began to orchestrate on the deck. What in the name of all that is holy is that damn noise!?

"Our little guest doesn't seem to like Swordsman-sans snoring," I heard the woman, Robin, laugh.

That was a person!? Glancing behind me to the mast I caught sight of the man who the sounds originated from. The man sat, arms crossed and swords sitting in his lap, as he let his head hang lazily to the side with drool flowing from his lip.

"SHUT IT MOSS HEAD, SOME OF US LIKE TO THINK, UNLIKE YOU!" Sanji roared out, not helping my sensitive ears at all. As if there wasn't enough torture, the swordsman seemed to snore louder in defiance as he continued to snooze.

My god, make it stop!

Noticing my pain, Nami decided to take pity on me, "Come here boy, I'm getting tired of hearing that moron." She called to me with a whistle and that's all the incentive I needed.

Quickly springing to my feet, I clumsily sprinted through the door on my cartoonishly tiny legs as the long-nosed pirate shut the door. The man was still audible through the oak walls but was muffled to a bearable volume thanks to the door.

I took a seat by the table but stiffened when a hand planted itself on my furry head, "At least me and Sanji aren't the only ones that despise zoro's snoring." Nami said to me playfully.

I looked up at her and we stared for a few seconds as i blinked in confusion as her hand continued to rub my head. She kept a stoic face for the longest time but her lips twitched as a smile wormed its way on her face, "Your such a silly looking dog, you know that?"

Like I needed to be reminded. I tried to look annoyed but that seemed to spur her smile into laughter at my continuingly goofy look. I'm not gunna be taken seriously ever am I?

Another pair a hands made contact with me and i couldn't help but squirm at the uncomfortable feeling as they picked me up, "He's really fidgety isn't he?" Ussop commented as he brought me to eye level.

"He's probably not used to being picked up and touched so much," Robin commented as she and the rest of them watched us. Not counting the straw hatted kid that began to stuff his face on the food that Sanji cut while he wasn't looking.

Luffy's advantage didn't last long though, "GET AWAY FROM THOSE YOU RUBBER IDIOT!"

The boy just laughed and leapt away from the chefs dropkick as I was continued to be studied by the Ussop.

He gave me a quick sniff before his face scrunched up in disgust as he held me further away, "Ugh, he smells like rotten garbage!" Of course you would notice with your sniffer, buddy.

"Hey, look at your noses! you could be brothers!" Luffy laughed merrily as he finally took a hit from the blonde headed embodiment of rage but continued to laugh anyway.

Ussop didn't take that very well, "Oi! You dare insult the King of Snipe-HEY, don't touch my food!" I was quickly placed on the table as the two crew members began to wrestle the boy to the ground.

I just stared at the spectacle as the two girls and bear began to speak again as if mutiny wasn't being committed right this second. These are the weirdest people I have ever seen. If this ever happened in my old crew the captain would've had our heads.

Who is the Captain anyway?

"We should probably decide who watches him first," Nami said as she took a sip from her orange beverage.

So were just gunna continue ignoring this fight?

"I believe Doctor-san should watch him just in case he rips his stitches again."

I guess we are.

"He needs a bath real bad," Chopper lifted a hoof to his nose. "I don't think my nose can take it anymore!"

I'm sitting right here ya'know.

"Can you give him a bath, Chopper," Nami asked.

I'm not gunna let you touch me if you even try.

Chopper shook his head violently, "I might pass out if I try to muscle through it again!"

Nami just sighed at that, "Then it's either me or you, Robin. I don't trust these idiots with being gentle with him."

I'm a grown-ass man, I don't need someone washing me!

They both looked at me with less than pleased expressions at the thought. well, Nami did, I don't even know what was going through the others head with her blank face.

The next few seconds would decide my fate and it was settled with the almighty choice maker.

Rock-Paper-Scissors.

"I guess it's just me and you."

god help me

This Fiction will consist of shorts ranging from 1,500 to 3,000 every chapter till I decide to place one of the larger story events so it will be a little slow at the start. For now just enjoy some fluffy, smile-forming moments.

-Cave Hermit