When they got home, Rick expected Kate to disappear into their bedroom and hide out for the day. She surprised him though.
"Hey, Little Red?" Kate asked quietly, taking the child's hand as they came through the door.
"Yes Kate?" Alexis asked softly. Rick copied Kate's smile at her.
"Can I come hang out with you? You wanna play something in your room?" Alexis positively beamed at the request.
"We could colour?" She offered, ever so eager to please. Kate smiled and squeezed her hand.
"Sounds good to me Sweetie. Go on up and get everything ready, I just need a word with daddy." Alexis nodded enthusiastically and ran up the stairs while Kate turned to a softly smiling Rick. "That's okay, right?"
"Course it is. You don't need my permission to spend time with my daughter Kate." Kate nodded, dropping her eyes to his chest as she worried her lower lip. "You okay?" He asked gently, cupping her cheek with a soft touch and running his thumb under her eye. Kate's eyes slipped shut for a moment and when she opened them, they were swimming with tears.
"I just, need to remind myself that there is still such innocence in the world. I just need to not be a grown up today." Rick leaned in and rested his lips against her forehead, not quite a kiss just a physical connection, hoping to soothe the quiver in her lip.
"You can do whatever you like today Kate. And hey, if you need to not be a grown up, I'm more than happy to eat ice cream for dinner." Kate laughed. It was a little thin and watery but it was there. Rick smiled. "Anything you need Kate." She nodded and wrapped her arms around his waist.
"Just you two. I just need you." Rick kissed her crown and held her close until she pulled away, dry eyed, to go and colour with his daughter.
Kate and Alexis were laid on her floor on their stomachs as they coloured. It was pretty silent, Kate not ready to talk and Alexis unwilling to push the teenager, but it wasn't uncomfortable. Eventually Alexis looked up at her companion and sighed softly before sitting up and crossing her legs, studiously watching the crayon she was turning end on end on her hands.
"I'm sorry you're sad." She murmured so softly it almost wasn't worth it. Kate's crayon stopped moving though and she slowly looked up at the girl.
"You needn't apologise Alexis. It's not like it's your fault." Kate reminded her softly. Alexis shrugged.
"I know that. I just, don't like to see you so unhappy." Kate sighed and sat up, mimicking the girl's position.
"It's okay to be sad Alexis. Sometimes people just need to be sad for a while." Alexis nodded.
"I know. Daddy was sad when he got letters from people saying they wouldn't publish his book. He gets sad whenever I'm sad. And I get sad sometimes. But it's not nice to see someone sad." Kate nodded slowly, watching the floor.
"You're right, it isn't. I'm sorry my being upset has made you unhappy." Alexis shrugged.
"You've got bad stuff going on at home. You're allowed to be sad." Kate looked up at that.
"Is that what daddy told you? That I have bad stuff going on at home?" Alexis nodded.
"He said that you are very sad and there's lots of stuff at home that isn't very good." She told her slowly. "And that you got a call this morning with bad news." Kate nodded, processing. They hadn't ever talked about how much to tell Alexis. It hadn't come up but Rick had been trying to keep it kiddie friendly, and within a level of detail that Kate would feel comfortable, while still explaining it to her. She appreciated the effort but Alexis was a smart girl. She needed more than 'Kate's sad'.
"Alexis." Kate started softly, not really sure how to do this. "Would you know what I meant, if I said someone had died?" Alexis' little spine straightened as she nodded solemnly.
"Daddy says when it's a person's time; they leave us to go to heaven. Like my goldfish or Mr Goldberg." Kate smiled softly, making a mental note to ask Rick who 'Mr Goldberg' was.
"Exactly, clever girl." That earned her a small smile. "Well two weeks before I met your daddy, before I met you, my, uh my mommy went, to h-heaven." Kate stumbled. Alexis looked so stricken that Kate almost regretted telling her.
"But you're not a full grown up yet, it couldn't have been time." Kate felt like laughing at the 'not a full grown up' but her heart was to busy breaking to feel the joy the phrasing brought.
"You're right Little Red, it wasn't time. Someone very bad made it her time long before she was ready." Alexis nodded slowly. "And because of that, my daddy, isn't very well. And he won't get the help he needs to get better." She refused point-blank to explain alcoholism to a four year old if she didn't have to.
"But my daddy's making your feel better, right?" There was a desperation in her voice that made Kate's heart hurt.
"Yeah baby girl. He is. You are too." Alexis' lower lip trembled. "Oh Sweetheart, come here." She opened her arms and encased the girl as soon as she had crawled into her lap. Kate gently kissed the top of her head and rocked them both from side to side. "I'm sorry Alexis. I shouldn't have told you. I didn't mean to make you upset." Alexis shook her head against her chest before lifting it to see her.
"You didn't. Just sad that you have to not have a mommy and have a sick daddy." Alexis murmured. "Sad you had to do it alone before daddy made it better." Kate kissed Alexis' forehead and drew her back into her chest.
"Don't be too sad Angel. I now have your daddy, and you, to make me feel better. You two make the sadness lighter. You make it better Little Lex. And I'm so, so grateful."
"I love you Kate." Alexis mumbled, wrapping her tiny arms as far around her back as they'd go. Kate felt her heart constrict.
"Oh Alexis, I love you too."