Chapter Five: May 28, 2012

Ashton

It was a Friday night, and I was once again slouched on the couch. I drummed my fingers against the arm of the couch when I felt my phone buzzing in my pocket and I pulled it out. I had one new message from Luke asking me to pick them all up. I replied asking why, but I ran upstairs and shoved my feet into my boots, grabbed my keys, and slipped out the front door. He answered as I buckled my seatbelt; Grotto.

I drove to Luke's house first, since it was closest. Then Calum's and finally, Michael's. We went to the Grotto, an underage dance club. The thing about the Grotto was that even though it was an underage club, the bartenders still served alcohol. If you went up to the right ones, you could end up with seven different types of drugs in your hands. The boys and I never participated in the drug use - just say no, right - but the beer was the price of a Coke, and we're only human. But we always had a five drink limit and a designated driver. Tonight was Calum's turn, and he wasn't particularly happy about it.

When we stepped across the threshold and into the dim club, the pounding bass and hypnotizing rhythm of Florence + The Machine's 'Bedroom Hymns' invaded my mind. The throbbing lights and heavy smoke played games with my mind and I was tripping over beer bottles and red Solo cups and discarded clothes by the time the boys and I had made it to the bar. We each ordered a Coors from the tap, and I leaned my back against the counter to watch the scene. The song switched to Far East Movement's 'Like a G6' and the masses of sweaty bodies writhed against each other to the music.

Our drinks were served and I nursed mine slowly while Michael downed his in five minutes and ordered another. I reminded him of the limit and how quickly it could be reached, and he nodded and drank his next one much slower. A fight broke out on the balcony that overlooked the bar and dance floor, and a patron fell over the railing and into the crowd. The raised him over their heads and moved him towards the bouncer, who kicked him out. We looked at each other and laughed as the song changed to David Banner's 'Dance the Night Away'. Michael slammed his palm against the bar counter and yelled, "Play better songs" as the rest of us wandered out onto the floor.

An hour later, I had passed my five beers limit and Calum was driving us home in my car. My vision shook and vibrated and my stomach churned. My throat burned from screaming and my ears rang. The bass still pounded in my head and the strobe light still flashed before my eyes. Cal, Michael and Luke sang along to a Green Day song, and I was slumped in the passenger seat trying not to throw up all over the interior of the car. We came to my house first, and I noticed, even in my dazed state, that the driveway was still vacant, and my mum wasn't home yet. The light in the front room was on, though.

Calum helped me out of the car while the boys yelled at me to stay and go out to another club. Cal and I made up to the front door, where he rang the doorbell. We stood there for a few minutes until the door opened.

Summer

"Hey, Summer." Calum smiled at me. Ash was slumped up against him and I could smell smoke and alcohol on his breath.

"Hi, Calum," I gave him a tight smile while trying to breathe through my mouth. Together we helped Ashton to the couch where he buried his face into the pillows and clutched at his stomach with a groan.

"He can barely stand!" I remarked. "How much did he have to drink?" I ran a hand through my hair and crossed my arms. I stared at my drunken foster brother with a look of disappointment.

"Something like ten to fifteen beers," Calum rubbed the back of his neck and shoved his right hand into his pocket. My jaw dropped. "Do you need help getting him upstairs?" Calum gestured to the staircase.

"No, I can probably do it on my own." I sighed and looked at Cal. "Thanks again, though. I'm sorry about Ashton, too,"

"Ah, don't worry. He may not seem like it, but he's a funny drunk," Calum made his way to the front door and I followed him. "I'll drop the boys off at home and come back with the car, and then I'll walk home," He paused in the open door.

"Are you sure? I can go with you so you don't have to walk home," As I spoke, Ashton groaned from the couch.

"It's only a block away, and I am a big boy. I won't jump into any strange vans if they don't have candy," He smiled, and I laughed. "Plus, I think you need to get Irwie a bucket before he pukes all over Anne's couch." He smirked and stepped onto the porch and began moving toward the car.

"Bye." I called to him with a wave and he smiled at me over his shoulder. Luke and Michael yelled at me through open windows and I raised a hand to them before going into the house. I moved to the couch and helped Ash to his feet. He swayed for a few seconds as I wrapped mine and his arms around us. It was the first time that I noticed that I stood to his full height.

Together we managed to get to the downstairs bathroom without Ash throwing up on floor carpet. He got the vomit on his shirt instead. I dropped him and he fell to his knees in front of the toilet and emptied his stomach until he was dry heaving. He clutched the bowl so tightly that the blood ran from his knuckles. He stood and stripped himself of his soiled t-shirt and climbed into the bathtub. I threw his shirt into the wash after cleaning it off and sat on the floor by the bathtub. Ash had the water running in a steady, warm stream that soon filled the rectangular bowl to the brim. I reached over to turn it off and Ashton caught my arm as I pulled it back toward me. He flipped it and gently traced the lines on my palm with his index finger.

"So you're a lefty," He mused softly.

I chuckled. "How can you tell?"

He pushed the mountains of bracelets I had piled on my wrist, revealing my scars.

"Oh," I whispered and tried to tug my arm away from him but he held fast.

"When'd they happen?" He studied the scars thoughtfully.

"When I was eleven, after the news of my mom's suicide reached me. I stopped on my twelfth birthday." I paused. "Can I have my arm back?" I asked uncomfortably and he released my arm. Silently, he removed his bracelets one by one until his right wrist was uncovered. He turned it over and showed me his scars. I frowned at them and he watched my intently.

"Why'd you do it?" I met his hazel eyes and immediately felt like I was drowning in a million different ways. His bright eyes showcased dozens of different and captivating emotions that drew me in.

"I was bullied. I was told to kill myself multiple times. When my bullies found out about the scars, they told me to keep cutting," He shifted uncomfortably and water sloshed over the tub's rim and onto my jeans. I stared at the dark spots on my legs but still felt his gaze on me. We sat like that in silence for a while until Ashton spoke again.

"I don't want you to leave," He whispered.

"Why not?" I implored softly.

"'Cause you take the pain away,"

I laughed softly at this. "That's just the beer talking," I stood and Ash did the same.

"No it isn't. I'm serious. I mean, when I'm with you, I feel lighter than I have in a long time. The boys help, but not like you,"

I bit my lip, unsure of what to do or say, and we lapsed into silence again. We watched each other; Ash stood in the still-full tub, his jeans and bare chest dripping wet, and I stood before him, the wet spots on my pants drying slowly. The quiet wasn't uncomfortable as it was loud. I felt that if I didn't break it, it might consume us, s cleared my throat.

"Um, I'm gonna go get you some dry clothes and a towel, and you can change up here, and then go to bed, I guess. Okay?"

He nodded slowly and I departed, jogging upstairs to his bedroom. I went to his dresser and pulled open a drawer, revealing tons of sweat and plaid pajama pants. I reached for a pair of black-and-white pajamas and closed the drawer while opening another one that turned out to be full of socks. On the top of all the socks was a piece of paper labelled, "Band Names", at the top. My curiosity took hold and I pulled the paper out of the drawer and sat on Ashton's unmade bed.

It was a list that was divided into five parts, band name ideas from Luke, Michael, Calum and Ashton. The fifth column had four names, one from each of the boys, that were supposedly the best ones they came up with. Michael's was "The Rejects", Luke's choice was, "Lost Boys", "Yellow Day" by Calum, and "5 Seconds of Summer" from Ashton. Ash's selection caught my eye, and I wondered if he chose the name on purpose, or if it was just a coincidence. "5 Seconds of Summer" was circled, and the boys had found their band name. A smile tugged at the corner of my mouth as I stood to put the list back where I had found it. I shoved the drawer shut, grabbed a white t-shirt from his closet, a pair of boxers from his dresser, and trotted back downstairs to the bathroom.

The next morning, I was sitting at the bar eating cereal when Ash shuffled into the room, his feathery hair askew. I snickered and took another bite of my cereal.

"Morning," He mumbled, reaching for the aspirin that was kept on a shelf above the sink.

"Morning. Sleep well?" I cocked an eyebrow as he dry-swallowed four pills. "How can you do that? I can barely take one without drinking a whole glass of water,"

"Mm-hmm. Can you speak quieter or not at all, please?" His voice was scratchy, probably from yelling in that club all night.

"Oh. You're hung over. Then I guess you don't remember anything about last night, huh?" I leaned my elbow against the counter and rested my cheek in my palm.

"No. Is there something I should remember?"

I took a deep breath, about to tell him what he said to me when he got home. I decided against it.

"Nope. Nothing. Calum brought you home; you threw up, and then got into bed. That's all,"

"Does mum know?"

"No. I told her you weren't feeling well this morning, so you probably won't be seeing much of her,"

"Okay." He nodded. "Thanks," He sat on the stool next me and slumped over the counter.

I cringed. "Ugh. But you might wanna shower and rinse your mouth out, like, ten times each. You don't smell very well, and if you don't Anne to find out..." I trailed off, shoveling another spoonful of Lucky Charms into my mouth. Ash nodded again, stood, and went into the bathroom. He shut the door and a few minutes later I heard the water turn on. I stretched my arms above my head and got to my feet. I took my bowl to the sink as Harry walked in.

"Good morning, Harry," I smiled at the miniature version of Ashton.

"Morning, Summer." He grinned back and threw his arms around me. I hesitated before hugging him back.

"What're you doing?" I whispered with a chuckle.

"Making the best of our last two months together." He flashed his dimples at me and dropped his arms. I kept my smile on until I reached my room.

A/N: Thanks for reading! Please review :)