To Love and to Love Again Chapter 30: Choices

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER AND AUTHORS NOTE: I do NOT own Naruto. The awesomeness of the Naruto Manga and World is the creation of Masashi Kishimoto. This is Purely Fanfiction. All things Medical in this entire fanfiction should not be taken as serious medical advice or facts. PLEASE CONSULT AN ACTUAL DOCTOR FOR ANY MEDICAL INFORMATION/QUESTIONS. THANK YOU AND ENJOY!

The figure moved in the shadows and infiltrated the room. Get in, get out. That's what they had to do. Sasuke was asleep, but barely. He was still sedated from the meds, which worked for now. Can't have him waking up. Too many questions would arise.

The figure placed the note on the side of his bed. The message was clear, and the person was confident that Sasuke would figure it out within seconds. He needed to know. The figure knew that Anko Mitarashi had figured it all out.

The figure trusted that Sasuke would do what was needed. He needed fair warning. The figure didn't see this as a betrayal to the CIA, because it wasn't. Sasuke needed to make amends, and the figure decided that now was the time. If the agency apprehended him, Sasuke would lose his chance.

Without a sound, the figure took one last look at him, before slipping into the shadows and out of sight.

Sora knew something was wrong when his mommy said Suki was going to stay with them for a while. Everybody came over to the house earlier because Suki's daddy was in the hospital. His mommy told him that Sasuke got hurt at work and he needed to stay at the hospital to get better.

When Sora asked how Sasuke got hurt, his mommy wouldn't tell him. He really wanted to know because Sasuke was the strongest adult Sora had ever known, and he thought nothing could hurt him. He kept asking his mommy, but she always said that she didn't know and that the best thing to do was to make get well cards for him because Sasuke really likes his ninja drawings. He told Sora just the other day.

Suki asked when he would get better and told them she needed to give Sasuke a kiss to make him feel better. Sora saw his mommy smile and say that when it was okay, she would be able to do that. Sora thought she was acting weird because she would always peek out of the windows and make sure they were locked. She also said they weren't allowed to play outside for a while.

Sakura tucked the kids into their beds for the third night in a row after the incident.

"Goodnight sweetie," she whispered as she kissed Sora's forehead. She moved to Suki's bed and did the same. "Goodnight sweetheart," she said before kissing her forehead and making sure Tonton was near. She turned off the light and closed the door.

Sora began drifting when Suki spoke.

"I miss my daddy," said Suki. Sora turned his head to look at her. Suki was curled up on her side with her stuffed piggy in her arms. She said his name was Tonton, and he laughed because his grandma Tsunade used to have a real piggy named Tonton.

"He'll get better," Sora reassured. "Mommy said so and she's a doctor remember?"

He knew Suki was still sad because she didn't smile.

"But how come Uncle Itachi said nobody can see daddy?" she asked. "Grandma told me that when people are sick, you're supposed to go to the hospital and give them flowers. Akira said so too because her grandma and grandpa sell flowers and they said we have too."

"Mommy said she doesn't think he'd like flowers because he's a guy," Sora replied recalling the way his mother started acting weird when he mentioned flowers. Little did he know about the incident in her office. "She said that we should make him some ninja drawings because he said he likes those."

"But I can't draw like you can," she said pouting.

"Then I'll draw them and you color them again," he suggested. "My grandpa gave me lots of new crayons and markers."

"Okay…but do you think daddy's…okay?" she asked with a big yawn.

"Uh huh. I know he is because he's strong like my grandpa. He told me he's stronger than a ninja!" he said with a yawn of his own. Whenever Suki started yawning, he would always start right after.

"My daddy will get better after I give him a kiss," Suki said followed by a great yawn. "Because kisses will make him all better," she said wearily before closing her eyes in sleep.

Sora's eyes fluttered closed after hers, not commenting on the kisses and getting better. His mommy told him that every time he got a boo boo. She would kiss him and say all better now. And his mommy was always right.

The message on the note next to his bed was simple, and effective.

"I.C.U- N-C.I.A"

Just minutes before, Sasuke had awakened in what was instinctively an inner knowledge of impending danger. He opened his eyes and scanned the darkened ICU room, noting that there was no one inside. In his peripheral vision he could see a few ICU nurses at their stations busy with charts. It was a quiet night, but that didn't mean it was safe. The note next to his bed was proof.

There was no time to think. He had to move.

Sasuke was ready to curse Tsunade into the sky for putting him in a medically induced sleep, but it was just the thing he needed to get his ass in gear. It opened up all the flood gates that his lust for Sakura had clouded.

He silently cursed as he fiddled with the monitor on his bed so that the rhythms repeated in cyclical motion. It was as simple as redirecting the wirings in the back. Once it repeated he pulled the nodes off his chest. He couldn't have the nurses rushing in thinking he'd gone into cardiac arrest if he just pulled them off.

The note told him that at least one person knew of his past. Their identity was unknown but they had bought him some time and that alone was enough to known they didn't want him found out just yet at least.

He activated his Sharingan and with painful determination he slipped out of bed and walked toward the cubby full of supplies and gowns each room had. He grabbed a pair of scrub pants and pulled them on, not even attempting the shirt with the gauze over his chest. The stinging sensation told him his movements were probably making his wounds bleed again.

He grabbed the note and slipped it into his dressings. Whoever left it here probably wasn't dumb enough to leave any evidence of themselves on it, but you never know. In any case, he couldn't leave the damn thing there. Silently, he pulled a chair towards the vents near the ceiling. It was the only way. Bracing himself for the pain, he jimmied the vent open and pulled himself up. The movement sent a searing pain across his chest and he knew at that point he had opened his stitches, but he couldn't stop.

He escaped his ICU room through the vents on the ceiling. He knew the layout of every floor in this hospital and thought up of every scenario in case he was discovered. This was one of them.

Thankfully he knew this hospitals blue prints from the inside out, and he knew this floors vent lead to the service staff section of the hospital and also the staff elevators; the ones that didn't have security cameras. The service elevator would lead him straight up to his office.

There was just enough room for him to painfully slide his way through the cold dark square of the ventilation system. The fans that kept the air flowing blew icy air in every direction. Most people weren't aware that hospitals were typically kept cool to prevent the spread of germs, which thrived in warm environments. So they weren't constantly blasting the air for nothing.

In any case, the cool air took a bit of the sting out of his burning chest. After fifteen piercing minutes, he finally made it to the service station vent where he made a sharp left and stared down into the ceiling vent of the service elevator. No one was there. He punched the vent open and slipped inside. He pushed the button taking him to his office floor.

How could he have been so blind?

He pulled out the note from his pocket and glared at the message: I.C.U-N-C.I.A

"I see you in CIA," he recited under his breath decoding the real meaning of the note as if it were a curse.

The CIA was on to him.

If they hadn't been before, they certainly were now. The note proved as much.

He was one of the worlds most wanted rouge assassins. Agencies from all over the world were on the hunt for who he used to be and never really knew the man behind the killer. But someone was finally on to him. Escape was necessary.

As he rode the service elevators, a thought occurred to him. For now it was a suspicion, but he had no doubt it would be confirmed. He needed his computer.

Whoever wrote that note had made him. He needed to know who that was.

He made sure to never draw attention to himself throughout the years. His records were impeccable with nothing even slightly suspicious to blemish it. But he couldn't chance it. The elevators stopped at his office level.

His computer would give him all the answers he would need.

"Shit," Anko cursed as she took a breath and skimmed over the finds once more. "Shit, shit shit," she repeated.

Anko thought that she would feel something in the area of shock if and when she confirmed that Sasuke had the curse mark, and initially she did. But then, when she really got down to the nitty-gritty of the matter, she discovered that she really shouldn't have been shocked at all.

She just didn't want to be right.

She knew of the Uchiha clan's long history with the CIA, and even before there was an agency they were prominent members of any kind of law enforcement as far back as the Edo period. They had deep seeded roots in all kinds of military and political dealings as far as government went. Along with other distinct families such as the Hyuga's or the Senji clan, the Uchiha's also shared unique physical abilities that were rumored to be advantageous in battle.

She dismissed them as a myth before she met Kakashi and learned the story of his gifted Sharingan eye.

For the past eight generations, the Uchiha clan's involvement in the agency has dwindled down to one member per family who would be informed and accepted into the CIA. The bond was usually passed from father to son and on rare occasions, mother to daughter.

Itachi was their front runner this time and Sasuke was their problem.

No one ever thought about it but Sasuke had all of the right criteria, just as she once had, to fall into the clutches of Orochimaru. She had to tell Kakashi right away. She knew that.

It made sense. Now if only she didn't have one other pressing matter to tell him first. She just couldn't hide it anymore.

"What else could possibly happen?" Kakashi asked himself as he plopped down in his chair.

After the meeting and subsequent combing of all the latest findings, he was spent. Itachi and Kiba had found trace amounts of blood on the rooftops. Testing confirmed that it matched the blood found in Sakura's house after the break in meaning her stalker was in all actuality, Sai's brother. Itachi also noticed scuff marks on the concrete, indicating some type of struggle. Sai's brother was not alone up there. He was either the shooter, or the one that interrupted the shooting.

Their money was on him being the shooter.

Either way, he was their number one suspect. The fact that he was after his dead brother's wife was no coincidence. The world was small, but not that small. There had to be another link in there somewhere and Kakashi had a feeling it was right under his nose. Then there was Sasuke. How did he fit into all of this?

He sighed. This was a mess, and he had yet to see how Sakura was holding up for himself. From what he was told, she and the children had stayed in Sasuke's home per Itachi's request. Sasuke's security system was state of the art, and though he didn't like admitting it, he was relieved that she had the Uchiha's looking out for her.

The frustration with this investigation was beginning to get to him. He hated feeling so helpless when it came to Sakura. Gaara had sent a message requesting a meeting with him as soon as possible. Kakashi had not forgotten that Gaara had taken it upon himself to investigate Sasuke and Sakura off the grid. He must have found something, or he wouldn't have bothered calling. This had been a hectic few months. He couldn't believe how much time had gone by.

He was tired, frustrated and leaning over the edge. He just needed a break. Thinking about that made him think about Anko.

He hadn't had a chance to see her as much as he would have liked. She checked in with him from time to time but she was preoccupied going back and forth from Kyoto with their other missions that didn't involve this case. Someone had to see to other matters. It had been almost three months since he had last seen her, and it was torture.

He missed that crazy dango-loving tomboy.

He reached for the phone to call her just at the doors to his office opened. No need for the phone anymore as Anko walked right in as if it hadn't been three whole months since he saw her.

Something's different, he thought after giving her the once over. There wasn't much to see as she had her coat buttoned all the way up with her arms stuffed in the front pockets, but still. It wasn't that cold out was it?

"Yo," she greeted. He immediately went on alert at the tone of her voice and the look on her face. Something was wrong and he knew it. He got up and walked around his desk heading straight towards her. Her eyes were dark; something was really wrong.

"I have someth-"she was cut off as he pulled her into his arms. Her arms that were stuffed into the front pockets of her coat acted like cuffs she couldn't escape from.

"First things first," he said as he found her lips. "I haven't seen you in months and I can wait for whatever it is you have to say," he said before kissing her again. To say she was shocked wouldn't cover it. Kakashi had been a perpetual low-key flirt since the day she had met him, but never had she seen this kind of passion from him outside the bedroom. The pressure from the job had to be getting to him and she was about to make it a whole lot worse.

Kakashi didn't realize how much he missed her until now. His career lead to a very solitary life, but other than Sakura, Anko was the one other constant he could depend on. Perhaps it was the time spent away, but she was as beautiful as ever. Not that he would tell her that. She would just punch him at the girly remark.

When he finally pulled away, Anko had to catch her breath. She missed him too, more than she wanted to admit, and she hated being the messenger and adding to his burdens. But technically part of it was his fault so he could just deal with that.

"Sit down. You're not going to like this," she stated.

When he didn't let her go, she sighed. She knew he was analyzing her. She pulled her coat closer to herself as a shield before saying "It involves the Orochimaru case. We cleared out that base of operations years ago, and we thought that we eliminated all of his associates. But we knew there was no way of knowing if we got everyone. Now we know that there is at least one person who got away and we know who that is now," she said getting the outline out there as painlessly as possible.

The jolt he felt when he saw her again lingered for a bit. It took him a few seconds before the severity of what she told him sunk in.

"What?!" he asked, or rather shouted. That case file was the biggest catastrophe and victory in the agency's history. "Are you serious? Have I been so off with the organization that I wasn't informed about it sooner? Who is it?"

She shook her head. "No. It wasn't an official find and I was the only one working on it. No one else knows," she stressed. "I knew if I made it official then things might spin out of control and I couldn't let that happen to your investigation."

Kakashi picked up on the link.

"How would that case file interfere with what's going on now?" he asked slowly. "How are they connected?"

Any type of association with the Orochimaru case and Sakura was too frightening to comprehend. Anko was torn. He had to know, but she couldn't help but feel like it was a betrayal. She had to get over herself.

"We know that Orochimaru had several henchmen carrying out his orders," she began. "He had small groups of them scattered throughout the country and we've managed to locate them all, or at least that's what we thought." She almost shuddered at all the types of characters they came across. "He was known to favor one person over the others for a highly unstable genetic mutation. As you know, I was the first one out of hundreds to survive it," she reminded. She knew he could feel her shaking and she cursed Orochimaru in hell. She hated bringing up this part of her past again.

Kakashi let go of her but remained standing before her without making any contact. He knew that this was a part of her past that she had yet to forgive herself for, and he would make it easier for her to talk about it by not trying to comfort her. She hated showing weakness, and he wouldn't make her think she was.

"Go on," he said. Anko took a deep breath. Her emotions were shot.

"After me, we didn't know if he would continue. But I know now that he found another subject for the curse mark experiment; one that had the genetic kick he needed to increase its power. That person is still alive. That person is here," she said as she stared directly into his eyes. She took a step back and braced herself. His proximity was doing things to her.

"He carries the curse mark….just like me," she continued. Kakashi placed his hands on her arms, preventing her from backing away from him anymore than she already had. She looked ready to pass out.

Anko didn't know why she felt the need to protect the younger Uchiha brother, even though she was about to turn him in. She felt a jolt in her abdomen making her gasp and hold her coat closer to herself. Kakashi, thinking she was in pain, eased up his pressure on her arms.

She had to tell him soon, and the news of the curse mark made Kakashi even more on edge. The curse mark was nasty business, and he saw firsthand what could be accomplished with it. The fact that someone else had it without having it monitored had alarm bells ringing.

"Who is it? Why is it killing you to tell me who it is?" he asked not liking how she was so distraught. She looked into his eyes, knowing that what she said was going to send him back to re-live those horrible times again. His daughter was once again going to be thrown in the middle.

"You need to keep these things in mind," she said quickly. "Not many people that were subjected to the curse survived. It had a 99% mortality rate. This person was resilient enough to not only possess it, but control it without the use of medication. He can't be taken lightly and we can't act without thinking. Remember that when I tell you who it is," she pleaded. "Don't make Sakura suffer any more than she has too," she added with a whisper.

She saw the change in Kakashi's eyes as his brilliant mind put the clues together. He needed to hear it.

"Anko…," he breathed with deadly undertones. "Who is it?"

"Sasuke Uchiha," she answered, even as his arms increased their pressure. "All this time, it was Sasuke Uchiha."

Kakashi's eyes hardened immediately as his head shook in denial. "…No," he whispered. Not this. Not him. It couldn't be. It was impossible. "That can't be right. He couldn't-"

"It's Uchiha," she repeated firmly. "I thought I was seeing things when I glanced at the curse mark on his neck, but I wasn't. Sasuke was the unknown assailant caring out Orochimaru's missions. Sasuke was the curse marked assassin that killed so many people. Sasuke has the genetic boost of the Sharingan to both enhance his power and give him the ability to maintain it on his own. We never even once considered him for the agency but we failed to consider that Orochimaru might have been aware of him. We knew he wouldn't give up the curse mark project. It all fits. I wouldn't be telling you unless I was sure."

"How can you be sure?" he asked. "There's nothing in his file to implement him in the slightest, even though I have Gaara looking over…"

He paused as he recalled Gaara's urgent message. Was this part of it? Had he figured it out as well?

"I've had my suspicions ever since the Gala in December, but I had no proof," Anko admitted. "I took a blood sample from the crime scene and it's confirmed. He's been faking his medical records for fourteen years. His DNA is riddled with the Sharingan and the curse mark. Because of the Sharingan, his cells are different from mine. The cursed mutation looks more hostile."

An emotion that was a mix between rage and shock overtook him. How could it have been possible? How could this have gotten past Itachi? How could two brothers live under the same roof and walk different paths? It was impossible. Sasuke Uchiha was the ace in Orochimaru's sleeve that had eluded them for years?

The rage came next. His daughter…his Sakura, was once again in the arms of a killer. And once again, he would break her heart.

For that alone, Sasuke would pay.

"Have you told anyone else?" he asked. "Was his shooting an agency decision? Damn it my daughter was right there, she could have been killed!"

She shook her head. "The shooting was not from the CIA's command. It really was an anomaly associated with Sakura. And I've already told you that you're the only one that knows. The bigger problem is the curse mark. I have never seen a mutation like that one before. It evolved to a level that we never anticipated. But Sasuke has a daughter and we don't know if the curse could be passed genetically or what side effects there may be to her."

"That doesn't matter for now. Suki's perfectly fine," he said, confused when she shook her head again.

"It matters. It matters more than ever now," she whispered. When he still looked confused she braced herself. "I'm so sorry. I've dealt you a major blow and I'm about to add to that. I was too damn scared to tell you at first, what with this investigation going on and you already had one kid to worry about. I just didn't know how to tell you and now it can't wait."

She stepped away from him and pulled her arms out of her coat, undoing the buttons. When she pulled back the flap and smoothed her hands over the curve of her abdomen, Kakashi's eyes widened.

It had been three months. Three long painful months without her, and he realized now that it may have been more than that.

"It matters a whole lot now… because I'm pregnant," she said, making herself look into his eyes. "Almost seven months along and don't you dare ask me who the father is because you damn well know it's you and always has been you!" she said, hating herself when water threatened to spill over her eyes. Pregnancy hormones were a bitch. How did Kurenai do it?

It took him a while.

It took him a long while. More like the span of a full two minutes. He simply froze.

Every thought circling in his mind had fallen back and all he could see was her.

In the span of ten minutes, his world had flipped upside down. Pandemonium would soon be unleashed. Sakura will be tossed around in secret once more. Orochimaru and all his evil were about to resurface again but this…but her…

Kakashi moved so quickly she nearly missed him. A split second later, she was in his arms once more.

"You really are insane," he said before kissing her. "You're aware of that aren't you?" he asked. Anko berated herself for sniffling as only girls cried and well…she was one of them.

"I have the curse," she said harshly. "You have the Sharingan. This baby's makeup is already set up just like Sasuke. We need to test his daughter. She's in danger too. The answers we need have to be in her biological information."

He simply nodded. "We'll have Tsunade do a full work up on you. Nothing will happen to our baby…or you, I promise. I won't let anything happen."

Anko tried to pull herself together, but failed. The weight of the world was no longer on her shoulders. She allowed herself to lean on him. Kakashi held her close as his thoughts began to swirl once more.

Sakura was being stalked, Sasuke Uchiha was a wanted assassin, and amidst all that he and Anko were soon to have a baby, whose future was as uncertain as ever.

He dared to ask himself once more. What else could possibly happen?

Sasuke heaved himself out of the elevator and into his office and immediately began to get to work. The dressings over his chest were now stained red. His stitches had to be re-done, but he had to escape first. He only had so much time until someone noticed he was gone.

Ignoring the stabbing pain in his chest, he activated his super computer and left the desktop computer alone. There was nothing in there that would incriminate him. What he had to do was retrieve his super computer system out of his black lacquer desk. That was as simple as sliding the compact component out of a hidden cubby built into the desk. Before he did that, he had to confirm all of his suspicions now that he knew where to look.

There had to be at least one person filtering around the hospital in order to get any intelligence on him. He had to pull up his staff and volunteer files and compare them to the CIA databank. From there it was a matching game. Anyone working here would show up there.

Cracking into the CIA databank was no easy task, but his computer was no joke either.

The hologram filtered the results in the air before him at light speed. He took that time to get a black jacket from the spare set he always kept in his closet. Even though it was the evening, he couldn't be seen walking around with blood stained bandages on his chest. It took a matter of minutes before the matches, more than he could have ever imagined, presented themselves before him. His breath hitched, and with it, a vast sense of disbelief.

Below the files, the images spread before him.

They were CIA; every last one of them. Pictures and profiles filled his brain with fact after covert fact.

Sasuke glared at the screen, as if it could feel his anger and disappear. All these years and never once did he suspect them. He was so busy trying to be undetected that they flew by his radar and went in the complete opposite path.

A rouge killer and the CIA, walking side by side.

Neji and Tenten were actually married. So were Naruto and Hinata, Shikamaru and Ino and Kiba as well. The children they have are legitimate; that much was true, but that was all that was true. Hell, even Rock Lee and Kurenai from the school were Agents as well as Chouji from the hidden leaf restaurant. Who wasn't a damn Agent at this point he thought as he skimmed through photos and files of their missions and history.

They were all scouted for CIA training at the age of eight. They all made the cut at age twelve and began their specialized schooling and training for the agency. That was right around the same time Orochimaru had found him.

Neji and Hinata had a long standing family history with the CIA as well as some specialized genetic scouting abilities unique to their clan. Tenten was a weapons specialist, Rock Lee was a combat expert, Kiba Inuzuka was the leader of the Canine unit, Shikamaru was their lead tactician, Ino was a botanist and Chouji was the agricultural expert. Even Itachi, his own damn brother.

Then there was the dobe.

Something about his file was off, and by off he meant classified. Even Sasuke wasn't able to breech that security. All he knew was that Naruto's abilities far excessed any of the other Agents and his DNA information was sealed. He was classified under a level 5 danger unit. He was the most dangerous out of all of them.

But his friends weren't just any Agents. They were the elite. The most highly skilled, highly trained in all their respective fields. And surprise surprise, who was their leader? Sasuke would have attempted a laugh if he were capable of it.

Hatake Kakashi was the head of the CIA.

He should have known. "Police Commander my ass," he thought as he skimmed through Kakashi's impressive records. Sasuke knew now that none of them, especially Kakashi and the dobe, were to be underestimated. If he made them, it was only a matter of time before they made him as well, if they haven't already.

He knew now that Sakura's life was orchestrated as such to protect her from the dangers of her father's occupation. There was a separate file on Sakura alone and it was specially encrypted.

Something worth guarding was something worth knowing.

His computer got to work. It took a few minutes, but it managed to bypass their system and reveal its contents. Once again, Sasuke saw red.

It was a file on all the kidnapping and assassination threats and attempts that were made on Sakura.

They started as early as her birth. Various groups and figures tried to use Sakura as leverage against Kakashi for being busted in their operations. The files indicated that Kakashi saw to the death of everyone that dared to threaten her and knew of his identity. On that front they were united. He protected her well. For that, Sasuke decided that Kakashi was to be respected. But what would the admirable Commander think when he found out his daughter had been in the arms of a different killer; a killer that was more lethal than anyone they had ever known… because he was determined not to lose her.

The file on Sakura changed at age sixteen.

Too curious for his own good, Sasuke unlocked the files and felt his pulse quicken at its contents.

Sakura was sixteen years old at the height of the Orochimaru investigation. Kakashi lead the CIA investigation on that case, meaning he had to spend significant time away from her. The threats against her never ceased, and he had no choice but to assign a highly skilled body guard for his daughter's protection.

And that's when he finally saw it, when he finally knew.

The Agent in charge was also sixteen. He was a covert Anbu Black Ops ROOT Division operative by the name of Sai.

The face that stared back at him from the photo hit him with a force unlike any he had ever known. He finally had a face to the name, and that face could have mirrored his own.

Sakura's husband was a CIA Agent. Her father assigned him to protect her, and he did that and more. He married her. He put his child in her. Then he left her in death.

Rage…all he could feel was rage. It bubbled beneath the surface of his skin. That bastard was nothing more than an Agent assigned to her protection and instead he used her. They all used her. Her life was one lie after another. His fury increased when he realized he was no better. If anything he was worse.

Sasuke wanted to kill someone, and if that bastard Sai was still alive, Sasuke knew he'd kill him himself.

The pain in his chest reminded him of his precarious condition. He had to get moving. Now that he had all the info he needed, he could get to work. The emotions and revelations were too much even for him to process at the moment. He needed time.

After disabling his security, Sasuke eliminated all other trace evidence of his presence. He took the pictures on his desk and laid the final touch by spraying his office was a chemical meant to erase all fingerprints and DNA left behind. Then he opened one glass unit and scanned the city below him. Using his grappling equipment, he shot out the harness and was gone into the night.

He had one more stop to make… and he couldn't waste it.

Sakura walked out onto the terrace in the yard. It was unusually cool for this time of year. The night's sky was an intense deep blue and illuminated by nothing more than the bright white full moon; no stars to dust the sky at all.

The kids were asleep, safe and sound in their beds.

The wind picked up and blew her hair behind her as she hugged her frame. She closed her eyes, letting the chill sweep her. It helped her think about things. She wanted to go back to Sasuke. She wanted him here with her and the kids. They needed him and missed him so much. She could see it in their eyes. He was so much a part of their lives that being without him was so strange.

She grabbed the necklace and toyed with the diamond circle. He was a big part of her life as well. She felt sick without him. Tsunade said he was recovering fast, although he was still not well enough to leave the care of the ICU. Sakura wanted nothing more than to be by his side until he woke up, but she needed to be with the kids even more, especially Suki.

But something didn't seem right. She couldn't shake the nagging feeling in her gut that something was wrong aside from the craziness of her situation, or rather their situation. She couldn't put her finger on it but she knew something was about to change.

She hated this. She hated feeling weak. That was why she pushed herself through life to get stronger. From the moment she was teased as a child for her big forehead, to the time she fought with her father for Sai's love and the years she spent working herself to the bone in her studies to become a doctor while pregnant, Sakura vowed she would overcome her own weaknesses in a world where the weak couldn't thrive.

She only hoped she was strong enough to get through this ordeal.

Sasuke entered Suki's bedroom without making a sound. The security camera in his basement showed Sakura out on the balcony before he disabled the system entirely. He knew the CIA would be all over his house once they figured things out, and they would. He couldn't leave anything to chance.

He saw that both kids were out for the night, and felt a new kind of twinge in his chest at the thought of leaving them.

He placed his hand over Sora's head. He was an amazing kid. Sasuke couldn't have been more proud of the boy. He showed the potential to be great, in anything he did. But his most outstanding characteristic was his love for his mother. He was a protector by nature. This five- year-old boy was Sasuke's solace. He would take care of his family. Sasuke finally had a son.

Suki slept peacefully in her bed. Her angel face highlighted by the moon made Sasuke wonder how such a child had come from him. She was his redemption. For all he did in this world, it was only right that he give it something good, and that was Suki.

He placed his hand into her open palm, smiling as her tiny fingers wrapped around his and held on tight. It was just like when she was born. When her mother died, Suki was all he had left, and the moment she grasped his finger with her tiny hand and squeezed with all her newborn might, he was hers.

He vowed to end this and come back to his family. They weren't safe so long as those people were still out there. This was his chance to finally put his past to rest.

He kissed Suki's cheek and walked out of the room.

Out in the cover of the trees, Sasuke watched her walk around the terrace and felt his heart stop for just a moment at the sight of her. He decided then that he would never get accustomed to just how beautiful she really was. The moonbeams illuminated her form displaying her in all her beauty before him, almost seeming as though the night wanted him to get one last complete look at the woman who held his heart.

Her silky hair, longer now as she hadn't cut it for months, blew out behind her with the wind against her frame. She was wearing nothing more than her favorite red shirt with the white circle on her back and black athletic pants. He would have chastised her for wearing such little clothing in this weather, but knew from her outfit alone that she must have been trying to fight stress with working out.

She toyed with the diamond circle pendant her gave her and was still beyond pleased that she wore it daily as if it were her wedding band. It symbolized just as much. Her eyes were closed, taking in the wind as she contemplated things in that mind of hers. He didn't know what her thought process was, but he knew that he was a big part of it.

The wind blew her scent straight towards him, bringing up emotions like a stab wound. He wanted nothing more than to bring her into his arms and let her scent intoxicate him.

If only he could see her green eyes, then he could see into her soul. He could see everything in her eyes, as there was nothing she could hide from him there. She let him into her very being just by those emerald orbs alone and he had taken merciless advantage of that. She received nothing in return from his eyes. He had constantly lied to her trusting face since their first meeting and for that he would never forgive himself.

He took her trust and gave her none of his in return, hiding his lies behind the shield that he never wanted her to shoulder his burdens among her own. But he knew better. He just couldn't find it in himself to trust her, because she held his soul in the palm of her hands and that scared him more than anything. He was the one who had really been played. He had fallen to her feet with his heart and soul. She was the only woman to have ever made him fearful of himself. She had infused herself into his mind and body, making sure he would never forget her.

She held his heart. She was the only woman to ever do so, and he knew that she was the only one who ever will.

He was in love with Sakura Haruno.

She brought down all his defenses and captured him. She was the most powerful woman he had ever known, and the most frightening. With love for his baby girl, she brought him down. She would never know just how much of a place she held in his heart. Words would never be able to convey the mess that was his heart, or the reasons behind his decision. It made what he had to do that much harder.

Sakura took in a deep breath and inhaled the air that smelled like cherry blossoms. The wind stilled for just a moment, enough for her to realize that she wasn't alone anymore. Senses alert, she didn't turn when she detected the presence behind her. She didn't have too, somehow she knew. Stunned, she didn't turn until he called her name.

"Sakura….," he said. He watched as she turned around and let her breath hitch in shock. It was then that he was finally able to see her beautiful eyes totally focused on him.

"Sasuke," she breathed "How…what…" she was at a loss for words, especially when she saw what he was wearing.

Still shocked, she took in his attire: black sleeveless shirt emphasizing his lean, bare muscular arms, black military looking pants, a roped belt with what appeared to be a sword tucked beneath it, black boots and black arm bands. He looked so dark…and so dangerous.

The wind picked up once more bringing back the chill and the rustle of leaves across the terrace, but she didn't feel any of it. She could only think about Sasuke standing ten feet before her and deciding whether or not she was hallucinating.

"Sakura," he said gently as he began to come closer. She knew she wasn't hallucinating then. He was here and focused on her. He was out of the hospital. But she knew no good could come out of this. The bad feeling from before came back tenfold.

He stopped just a foot away from her. He could see the shock and the question in her eyes. She couldn't believe he was here. She lifted a hand toward his face, hesitating and drawing back before she could make contact. He grabbed her wrist, making her start as he drew her hand to his face and grazed his lips against her palm, all the while keeping his eyes locked on hers.

Shockwaves traveled from her hand to her heart from the sensation of his lips as his other arm came at her waist drawing her closer. Her free hand went up and placed itself over his chest where he was shot down just days before.

"Oh Sasuke," she whispered before he couldn't handle it anymore. He pulled her to him, not caring about the dull pain in his chest as he did so, and crushed his mouth onto hers. She melted into the kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling herself as close to him as possible. All the questions in her mind were halted as she surrendered herself to his kiss. His mouth ravaged hers, making sure she knew that he was real, and that she was his.

They broke apart for barely a second before he pulled her back for another fervent kiss. She could feel the desperation and need to blend with her in his kiss. She needed it just as much. She kissed him until she couldn't breathe anymore.

"It's you," she whispered as he planted kisses along her cheek and neck before claiming her mouth once more. "I can't believe it. How Sasuke?" she asked as she took his face in her hands. "Sasuke why are you here? How did you get out of the hospital? It's only been three days since you've been shot you shouldn't-"

He cut her off by grabbing her hair and crushing his mouth on hers again. He didn't want to explain himself, not just yet. He desperately needed her; needed to absorb her into his mind until he was drunk with her.

She couldn't fight him. Not when she was wrapped up in his arms like this. It wasn't a dream. He was here, and he was with her. He was okay, and that was more than what she could have hoped for.

She broke the kiss, determined to figure things out.

"What's going on? Why are you out of the hospital Sasuke?" she asked running her hands over his chest. "You shouldn't even be able to walk yet, I don't understand," she said seeking his eyes for answers.

"There's a lot that you don't know about," he finally said. "But there are things I need to do; things that I can't ignore anymore."

Sakura looked even more lost at that. "What things? What don't I know? Sasuke tell me what's going on? Why were you discharged from the hospital? Why didn't anyone call me?"

"I wasn't discharged. I left," he answered.

"…What do you mean you left?" she asked. "You just decided to leave and they let you? I don't believe that! Tsunade should never have allowed it!"

"I didn't ask anyone. I left. I had too."

Something about the way he said that didn't sit well with her at all.

"No one even tried to stop you?" she asked. "Naruto? Neji? Anyone?"

He waited a beat before saying "…No one knows I'm gone."

He eyes widened. She really didn't like the sound of his tone. Fear began to mix with dread.

"…You…snuck out of the hospital? Out of ICU?" she asked disbelievingly. No one could get past ICU without notice. It was impossible. "Why? Why would you do that? How did you do that?" she asked incredulously. "Sasuke please what's going on?"

Her eyes showed her fear and concern for him. They showed him everything he needed to know. He would destroy her no matter what he did. He was poison in her life and nothing good would come to her from it. But damn if he didn't love her anyway.

"You're so beautiful," he said before pulling her up to kiss her again. Sakura was more confused than ever, and she was now beginning to panic. This felt too much like a goodbye, and she was not happy about that.

"…Sasuke…what are you wearing? Why are dressed like that?" she asked. "Don't try to distract me," she said sharply when it looked like he would kiss her again. She needed to focus and fought her way out of his arms, otherwise she was putty in his hands. "Tell me what's going on!" she demanded.

The wind picked up again, swirling foliage and the scent of cherry blossoms in the air. He could see the Sakura tree sway behind her in a curtain of pink blossoms. It would kill him, but he had to say goodbye to her. There was no choice anymore.

"Suki loves you," he began. His eyes bore directly into hers as he spoke. "My daughter is my life. She was the only thing that ever mattered to me. She loves you," he repeated, watching as her eyes took in every word he said. "She loves your son like the brother I wasn't able to give her. I never thought she would be able to have people like you and Sora in her life. That she has you and loves you is more than I could have ever wanted for my daughter."

"I love her too," she said. "I love her as if she was my own baby. Sora loves her as the little sister I couldn't give him. They complete each other."

"And that's why I would never leave her with anyone other than you. You're the only woman I trust with my daughter's life."

She immediately caught on now and widened her eyes as shock and anger surged through her system.

"And are you planning on going somewhere?" she asked. "You're speaking as though she's never going to see you again." His expression at her words made the fear overrun the anger. That's exactly what he planned to do. "Sasuke…" she said while shaking her head.

"There's so much you don't know," he repeated. "And for now, I want to keep it that way. Sakura…" he said taking a step closer to her "…I'm not who you think I am."

She looked at him disbelievingly. "What are you talking about? What do you mean by that?" The fear was invading her system, flooding her mind. He was here, and now he was talking about disappearing.

"The life I've led is not what it seems," he continued. "The only good thing about it was my daughter, until you and Sora came along. You changed everything. In you, my daughter found the mother she's always been missing, the brother she's always wanted and the love she so desperately needs that I couldn't give her."

He could see that she was scared out of her mind, but he couldn't stop. "I can't tell you everything. I can't risk you trying to stop me from what I have to do, because you're the only reason I would even consider it. I'm not the person you think I am Sakura. My life until now has been a lie. If you only knew what I really am…" he said, hating the fear in her eyes.

After what felt like an eternity, she spoke.

"…Then…who are you?" she asked. "If you're not who you claim to be, then who are you? What can't you tell me? You can tell me anything Sasuke it doesn't matter what it is. You can trust me."

The words hit him full force.

"No…I can't. Not with this. You've already been put in danger more than you could ever know. I won't have you carrying on more than that because of me. You don't deserve that."

"You're scaring me," she whispered. "Who are you? What are you? Sasuke you have to tell me what's going on!"

"I've made mistakes. I was involved in something that you couldn't even being to comprehend. Now the past has come back and I won't have you caught in the crossfires any more than you already are," he said before taking another step toward her. "Sakura, what's happening to you has everything to do with me, whether he wanted it too or not."

"Then you know why this is happening? You know who's behind all of this?" she asked.

"I have a good idea, and I won't rest until I take care of it for good this time," he replied with a deadly gleam in his eye. She had never seen that look in his eye before. It went beyond his glares of annoyance. It was murderous. "No one hurts what's mine," he stated.

"Sasuke…what have you done?" she asked fearfully. "Who are you?"

"…I'm a wanted man."

She waited a beat. "Who wants you?"

"…Your father," he answered. That response had her taking a step back in shock before registering his meaning.

"My father? You're wanted by the police?" Her body trembled at the thought. "What have you done?"

He once again realized just how little she knew of the people around her; how nothing and no one was what it seemed. Her whole life had been a lie as well, only she didn't know it. And he certainly wouldn't be the one to tell her.

"I've done things you couldn't imagine, and I'm about to do them again," he admitted. "I've finally put things together and I have to set it straight. I can't hide behind this pretense anymore. I'll protect you the only way I know how."

"What-"

"I have no right to ask anything from you," he said cutting her off. "But I will ask that you look after Suki. She loves you, and she needs you."

She went to him, grabbing his shirt and forcing herself to face him dead on.

"Just tell me. Tell me everything," she pleaded "Tell me who you are, what you've done, why you're trying to leave me and our kids behinds for some dire mission to find who's doing this to me. If you know something about it then just tell me! We can go to the police and help them with this. You don't have to be involved with it and you don't have to expose anything from your past."

"It will come out eventually. There's no stopping what I am or what I've done. If only you knew what I was you wouldn't be anywhere near me," he said darkly. She released him as if he had burned her. The look she gave him was one of pure disbelief.

"How can you say that to me?" she said harshly. "Do you really think so little of me? After everything we've been through, you think I would just abandon you because of your past? We'll I'm not that shallow Sasuke. How could I know when you won't tell me anything? You won't trust me with it. Just tell me, I'll believe you no matter what you tell me."

"I'm not…well. I'm not normal Sakura. It's beyond your imagination." he said. "But I'll stop this before I won't be able to anymore. Before anyone else finds out, I'll stop this bastard from doing anything to you but I have to leave, and I don't know how long I'll be gone or when it will be over."

"Don't," she replied. "Don't leave me. Don't leave us." She couldn't lose him. No matter what, she couldn't bear to lose him. She didn't know what he had done in the past. She didn't know what could have made him so closed off, so ominous and dangerous, but she knew that she couldn't live without him. She wouldn't.

"I have to. I have no choice."

"Yes you do," she countered. "You always have a choice. You don't have to do any of this alone. I'll be here. I'll help you with whatever you need. You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to so you don't have to leave. You're not alone Sasuke, not anymore. You have me. You'll always have me, no matter what."

"I can't have you!" he said harshly as he grabbed her arms and held her tight. "Where I'm going and what I have to do should not have to have you involved. You could never know what I did, what I went through before any of this. The things I've done, the people who paid for it can never be understood by you. I want you more than anything, but even I'm not that selfish of a bastard that I would drag you down with me."

"You could never drag me anywhere. I make my own decisions Sasuke, I always have. I'll go with you. I'll do whatever you want. I'll help you put an end to all this," she offered desperately.

"You're a doctor. Your path in life is to heal. Where I'm going, there isn't room for that. Sakura, I'm on the complete opposite path. I'm not safe. I'm not normal. I'm not even fully sure what I am myself. I'm not good for you. Damn it… just understand that much from me!"

"I can't!" she shouted. "I won't! I won't understand any of it because you won't tell me. You're standing here telling me you're not who I think you are; that you're leaving me, leaving my son and your daughter to go off God knows where and do God knows what. You can't leave me with ominous clues like that. You can't leave me with all these questions. You think you can just tear everything apart and we'll be okay with it? Well you're wrong! You'll destroy us by leaving. I won't let you! I had to tell Suki that you weren't coming home for a while because you got hurt. Don't you dare ask me to look that baby girl in the eyes and try to explain to her that her daddy isn't coming home at all!" she said as the tears welled up in her eyes.

"She won't' understand that," she continued. "She'll never understand that because I certainly don't! You'll break her Sasuke. She loves you. You're her whole world. Don't do this to her. If not for me, then for Suki, don't leave!"

She was clutching his shirt, threatening to tear it at the seams. The desperation was there in her eyes and Sasuke knew he had to get moving soon before anyone noticed he was here.

"Nothing will change my mind Sakura. This is what I must do," he said coldly. She wouldn't let him go, he knew that. But her eyes found his and she couldn't stop herself.

"I love you," she said.

His heart tightened, every muscle in his body tensed. Her eyes blazed fire as she opened herself up.

"I love you with all my heart Sasuke," she confessed "I don't know when it happened and I don't care how but I know in my heart that I can't live without you. I've never felt surer of anything in my life. No matter what you've done, no matter what you have to do, I love you with everything that I am. I will always love you from here on out so please," she said while holding onto him with everything she had.

"Don't leave me. Don't do this to me. I've already lost my first love. But I won't lose my true love too," she said. "I won't lose you."

He pulled her close and with all the love he could muster, kissed her with everything he had. He couldn't find the words to say to her, but with his kiss, he told her everything she needed to know. He loved her too. She was his one and only true love. Nothing could compare to her; to them. She was his everything.

Sakura felt his emotions absorb into her. She could feel his struggle, his determination…and his love for her through his kiss. She surrendered herself to him completely. She was his and always would be. Nothing could change that and she had to believe in that; believe in them.

He imprinted everything about her into his mind: her soft skin, her scent, her hair, and her beating heart. He would have given anything to have more time with her; to make love to her and show her exactly how much she meant to him in a way words would never able to. But he didn't have any more time. He didn't have any other option.

He pulled away and stepped back from her.

Sakura didn't even have to ask again. She saw it in his eyes. He was going to leave her. He was going to leave the kids. He was just going to leave.

He couldn't bring himself to say goodbye. With one last look at her, he turned and began to walk.

"Sasuke, I'll scream! So help me God I'll scream!" she yelled.

In the blink of an eye, he disappeared before her. She gasped when she felt him right behind her. A gust of wind carried his heat toward her trembling backside. Her hair flailed before her as his shadow loomed over hers. She couldn't turn around.

"Sakura…" he whispered as the wind howled and leaves rustled "…Thank you."

Her eyes widened with so much emotion, so much defeat before the sudden pressure on the back of her neck numbed her to everything else. Her eyes closed, and her body went slack. She fell back into his arms.

He lifted her up and carried her over to the terrace bench. He placed her on her back and positioned her properly. He stared down at her as he battled with emotions. Losing to himself, he knelt down and stole one last desperate kiss from her lips. Everything was riding on him now, and he couldn't fail her.

Knowing that the CIA Agents could show up at any moment, he straightened and with one last look at her, he disappeared into the trees and into the night.

When she woke up an hour later, the wind had settled and the stars were shining. The necklace on her chest symbolized the gaping hole in her chest. The tears had dried. He was gone.

And she screamed.

AUTHORS NOTE:

Yeah…I went there. I went everywhere. What've you got to say about that? Review and let me know in excruciating detail! SHANARO!