Sollux: ENGAGE
[Continuous Series, 12 Days of Christmas 2014]

The doorbell rang and Sollux cringed, slowly making his way through the living block to the front door.

"Yeah, who ii2 iit?"

"C'MON, LET ME IN ALREADY, IT'S FREEZING." He sighed with a smirk, throwing open the door to see a shivering Karkat, bundled up in some large sweaters that his Lusus likely helped him pick out. "CHRIST, WAY TO LET ME FREEZE MY GLOBES OFF IN THE FREEZERAIN."

"Ju2t come iin already, you biig crybaby." Karkat pushed inside, shivering and stripping off his sweater. "Al2o, liike. Thank2, ii gue22, for comiing over and helpiing out."

"HEY, SHUT UP MAN, NO PROBLEM. I GET HOW HARD IT IS, ESPECIALLY WITH ALL THE FUCKHEADS YOUR MATESPRIT INSISTED YOU INVITE." Sollux felt a blush creeping into his cheeks at the mention. "SO YOU'RE GOING TO DO IT TONIGHT, RIGHT? LIKE. THE WHOLE TEN LAWNRINGS?"

"Yeah. Here, check iit," Sollux reached into his back pocket to retrieve the ring: a gold band with three stones set into the center, red, fuchsia, and blue. "2weet, riight?"

"WELL IT'S CERTAINLY EXPENSIVE," Karkat grinned. "YEAH, YEAH, IT'S REAL SWEET. LET'S START THIS DECORATING SHIT BEFORE PEOPLE START SHOWING UP. FUCKIN' KANAYA'S ALWAYS EARLY WITH HER AWFUL TOUGH FRUITRING."

"Heheh, riight." First, the two erected a large tree in the center of the living block, decorated with several ornaments Sollux and Feferi had bought prior, and sliding the gifts under it.

"CAN I OPEN ONE OF MINE NOW?" Karkat asked, lifting one of his and rattling it.

"No, put that 2hiit down riight now," Sollux snapped, snatching it from him and setting it back under the tree.

"THAT'S SO STUPID, YOU GUYS GOT ME A FEW I CAN OPEN ONE NOW."

"Quiit beiing a whiiny baby, kk."

"WHAT, THAT'S BULLSHIT I COME OVER AND HELP YOU DECORATE THE HOUSE AND YOU WON'T EVEN LET ME OPEN A PRESENT?"

"FIINE. Here, ju2t open thii2 one and 2hut the hell up," he said, tossing a wrapped gift to Karkat.

"OH YES, OH FUCK YES, LET'S CUT THIS THING OPEN." Karkat grinned, tearing into the present and opening the box, his face contorting from glee to disgust. "WHAT? WHAT THE FUCK? IS THIS LITERAL SHIT IN A BOX? DID YOU ACTUALLY FUCKING GET ME A TRICK GIFT?" Sollux, at this point, was rolling on the couch laughing.

"Holy 2HIIT, fef wa2 totally riight! 2he knew you'd be a whiiny priick about iit and made me get you a giift you could open beforehand! Hahaha!" He ducked a closed box of lusus droppings before throwing it in the garbage and following a grumbling Karkat into the cooking block.

"Alriight, 2o, fef 2et u2 up wiith 2ome cookiie reciipiies and iin2tructiion2. 2he 2aiid there'2 no way we could fuck iit up." The two stood over the counter, looking down at the instructions Feferi had left, written in fuchsia with lots of "informative" diagrams of where to put the cookies and so on.

"SO. UH."

"What."

"I DUNNO, LET'S START."

"Yeah, let'2."

"…"

"…"

"WELL?"

"What? You do iit."

"I CAN'T READ THAT SHIT, IT'S YOUR MATESPRIT, CAN'T YOU DO IT?"

"Are you fuckiin' kiiddiin' me? Ii can't make head2 or fuckiin' taiil2 of thii2 2hiit eiither."

"AWESOME. WHAT A GREAT START TO THIS FUCKING EVENING. YOU CALL FEFERI, I'LL START DECORATING THE OUTSIDE OF THE HOUSE."

"God daaaaamniit." He pulled out his cell phone, texting Feferi for more comprehensive instructions before following Karkat out to the outside of the house. "Kk, what are you doiing?"

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN?" he asked, hanging from the gutter. "OH THIS? I JUST THOUGHT I'D HANG AROUND FROM UP HERE WHILE THE LADDER SITS DOWN ON THE GROUND. YOU KNOW. EXERCISE MY ARMS A BIT."

"Oh, cool, iif you're not 2tuck then ii'll ju2t go back iin2iide-"

"SOLLUX!" He grinned and straightened the ladder, tossing Karkat a roll of lights as Feferi sent him the reply and he made his way back to the cookies.

"Alriight, let'2 2ee. 'I left the cookies in t)(e pan, all you )(ave to do is pop t)(em in the oven and pre)(eat to 450!'. 2ound2 fuckiin' ea2y to me." He turned on the oven and threw the cookies in as Karkat stomped into the house.

"DAMNIT, SOLLUX, SEE WHAT I MEAN?" Sollux peeked down the hall to see a fashionably dressed Kanaya, with one hand up.

"Hello, Sollux."

"Oh hey kan. Iif you have any giift2 throw 'em under the tree, and iit'd be awe2ome iif you could help kk fiinii2h up out front." She gave a thumbs up and tossed a few gifts under the tree before heading back outside with Karkat, Sollux collapsing onto the couch and massaging his temples. "God damn, ff, you better be back here 2oon." He flipped open his phone to check his messages. Everyone had RSVP'd, even those he sorta wished hadn't, like Equius, Eridan, and Vriska.

"Ding d0ng!" Sollux turned to see a beaming Aradia, arms outstretched. "Hell0, s0llux!"

"Hey, aa!" Sollux smiled and gave her a hug before helping her put her gifts under the tree.

"I saw Kanaya and Karkat 0ut fr0nt putting up lights. They l00k great!"

"Haha, yeah, that'2 probably thank2 to kan. Ii don't thiink kk ha2 much of a decoratiion oriiented miind."

"Heheh, true! Mmm, I smell c00kies, t00!"

"Yeah tho2e wiill be done in a liittle biit. Wanna fiind 2omethiin' on TV whiile ii go check on kan and kk?"

"Surely! 0u0" Sollux slipped out of the living room, grimacing a bit. He and Aradia had broken up a while ago but it still stung. He wouldn't admit that the pain was helping drive him to propose to Feferi, mainly because he'd be lying.

"How are you two doiin'?" Sollux asked, folding his arms as he looked up at the two.

"I'M DOING GREAT NOW THAT I DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING," Karkat said, gesturing to Kanaya who was busy decorating the outside of Sollux's hive. "THAT GIRL HAS A SERIOUS MIND FOR FASHION."

"No kiiddiing."

"Done!" Kanaya said, smiling and coming down off the roof. "Does It Look Alright?"

"Look2 great, kan," Sollux smiled and Kanaya sighed with a grin.

"And It Appears We Have Some More Visitors." Sollux and Karkat turned to greet Equius and Nepeta.

"Sollux!" Nepeta said, pouncing into a hug with him.

"Haha, hey catniip! How'2 liife?"

"Purrfect!" she beamed up at him as Equius came up behind her.

"Captor," he said, eyeing him from beneath his cracked glasses.

"Hor2ecock," Sollux replied and Kanaya snorted audibly before excusing herself into the house with Karkat.

"Oh come on! Don't be so catty, you two! It's Christmas!" she said, nudging them and trilling the R in "Christmas" like a purr. "Be happy!" The two eyed each other for a moment before giving a nod.

"Fiine," Sollux sighed, shaking his head. "Ju2t don't me22 anythiing up or break anythiing."

"I… will try," Equius conceded. There was a tense moment before the two sighed and Sollux led them inside.

"We're halfway there!" Aradia grinned as the three entered. "Just six more 0f us! Where's Feferi?"

"2he'2 out gettiin' extra decoratiion2 and the la2t of the giift2-" He paused as he saw what Aradia had chosen for their Christmas show: A nature documentary focusing on predators hunting and eating prey. "Hey, uh, aa, maybe kan 2hould be iin charge of the chrii2tma2 moviie2."

"Aww," Aradia pouted as Kanaya gratefully snatched up the remote, turning to a more festive channel. "But it was getting to the good part!" There was a ring at the door and Sollux cringed. Here we go again. He moved Equius and Nepeta out of the entrance hallway and swung open the door onto a Vriska and Eridan engaged in a vicious hatesnog, hair mussed and gripping each others shirts tight.

"Um," he started, unable to really think of anything else to say.

"Fuck, g8t off me!" Vriska said, pushing Eridan down the slippery steps, landing on his ass in the freezerain. "Hey Sollux. Got some presents and shit," she said, her cheeks flushed cobalt and gesturing toward the gifts in her arms.

"Ii can take tho2e. Bathroom'2 la2t door on the riight," he said, thumbing down the hall and she gave a quick nod.

"Thanks, four-eyes," she said, slipping down the hall quickly.

"Wwhy, I'vve nevver-!" Eridan said, pulling himself up. "Wwell hello you filthy mustard-blood trash."

"Good two 2ee you two, you iin2ufferable a22hole. You gonna come iin or ju2t siit on your a22 liike a huge tool?" Eridan's fins puffed out as he rose to his feet, gathering the gifts he'd brought (precious few, most of which were wrapped in fuchsia wrapping paper, obviously).

"You wwould do best not to insult such a prestigious fuckin' seadwweller, you awwful lowwblooded scum."

"2hut the hell up and get iin2iide before ii tell ff you managed two break your neck iin the 2now." Eridan pushed past him and into the living block and Sollux scanned the horizon. No one else yet. He shrugged and closed the door as Vriska was entering the main room as well.

"Oh man, 'Young Kid Troll Wants a Toy Gun 8ut His Lusus Won't Let Him Get One 8ecause He Deems It Too Dangerous And A Series of Humorous Yet Implausi8le Situ8tions Unfold, Including 8ut Not Limited To Another Troll's Tongue Getting Frozen to an Alterni8n Ensign Metal Pillar and the Troll's Lusus Purch8sing a Light Fixture That Looks Like a Gi8nt 8ulge' AGAIN?" Vriska complained as she sat down on the couch, eating a handful of popcorn that someone had made.

"I Thought It Was Appropriate," Kanaya replied.

"HEY SOLLUX, LET ME SHOW KANAYA THE RING," Karkat said, holding out his hand.

"What? Why?"

"SHE WANTED TO SEE IT."

"Ii- fiine, ju2t giive iit riight back-" As he handed Karkat the ring, the doorbell rang and he groaned, jogging to the door and throwing it open.

"M3RRY CHR1STM4S!" Terezi said, throwing her arms wide, spilling presents all over the ground.

"Ye2, that'2 iit. Dump them all over my porch about thiirty feet from the tree, ju2t liike that. The sloppiier the piile and the further from the pre2ent2 the better. Niice goiing,terezii."

"TH4NK YOU."

"But 2eriiou2ly let'2 get thii2 2hiit iin2iide."

"4LR1GHT. 1S K4RK4T H3R3?"

"Yeah, he was liike, the fiir2t per2on here."

"SW33T. W4NN4 4NNOY H1M W1TH M3?"

"Ii'd love two, but there are 2tiill a few thiings ii gotta do, liike fiinii2h the cookiie2 and greet everybody el2e when they get here."

"TH3 COOK13S SUR3 SM3LL DON3. M4YB3 OV3RDON3?" Sollux spun, dropping the presents as smoke spilled from his cooking block.

"Sollux! Your oven's on fire."

"No, really, vrii2ka?" he asked sarcastically as he sprinted down the hall. "Ii couldn't fuckiin tell!" He swore and grabbed the hose from the side of the faucet and threw open the oven door, hosing down the contents and flipping the switch off. "God DAMNIIT. Fuckiin' ruiined."

"I think they're pretty g00d!" Aradia smiled, snatching one of the soaked, burnt cookies and crunching away.

"Well yeah, you would," Sollux sighed. "Fuckiin' a, could thi2 get any wor2e? Waiit, no-" There was a loud bang and the hive rumbled. Everyone jumped up, running to the front of the hive to see the damage, Sollux at the back. "God- fuck- everybody get outta the fuckiin' way-" He pushed to the front to see Tavros and Gamzee both laying out in the freezerain, dazed and confused, Tavros's four-wheeled device lying on the lawnring with a dented wheel.

"MaN, aNd I cOuLdA fUcKiN' sWoRe ThAt ThInG hAd BrAkEs," Gamzee replied, sitting up and rubbing his head.

",uH, i tHINK IT DOES, bUT, uH, yOU TOLD ME NOT TO PULL IT UNTIL THE LAST MOMENT?"

"WeLl HoW cOmE yOu DiDn'T pUlL iT, mOtHeRfUcKeR?"

"i, uM, dIDN'T KNOW WHEN THE LAST MOMENT WAS?"

"Alriight, look," Sollux said with a sigh. "Equiu2, can you fiix tav'2 chaiir?"

"I believe I can," Equius replied, rubbing his chin.

"Gamz, kk, carry tav iin2iide. Ii ju2t need two fiigure out what two do about the cookiie2 before ff get2 back." The group set into motion, Equius taking the chair to a side room to work on bending the chair back into its original position while Tavros was set onto the couch in the living room.

"oH, cOOL! 'yOUNG KID TROLL WANTS A TOY GUN BUT HIS LUSUS WON'T LET HIM GET ONE BECAUSE HE DEEMS IT TOO DANGEROUS AND A SERIES OF HUMOROUS YET IMPLAUSIBLE SITUATIONS UNFOLD, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO ANOTHER TROLL'S TONGUE GETTING FROZEN TO AN ALTERNIAN ENSIGN METAL PILLAR AND THE TROLL'S LUSUS PURCHASING A LIGHT FIXTURE THAT LOOKS LIKE A GIANT BULGE'! i LOVE THAT MOVIE!"

"You would," Vriska replied, flipping her hair.

"Kk, keep the peace, ii need two check the cookiing block for extra cookiie2." Karkat gave a salute and Sollux slunk into the kitchen, where Aradia and Terezi were chatting and giggling.

"W3LL TH1S P4RTY 1S FUN SO F4R," Terezi cackled.

"Yeah 2omethiin' liike that," Sollux said, scouring the pantry.

"0h c0me 0n, S0llux! It really is fun! Y0u kn0w what w0uld be really fun?"

"Hm?"

"Baking c00kies!" Sollux paused, turning to the two girls.

"You both can bake?"

"W3LL Y34H," Terezi frowned, turning her mouth up into a :?. "WHY WOULD W3 NOT?"

"Can you two pretty plea2e bake 2ome cookiie2 before ff get2 back? Iit would be really, really great of you both."

"Hmmmm," Aradia said, punctuating her fake contemplation with a tapping of her lip. "What d0 we get 0ut 0f it?"

"You can have all tho2e 2hiitty burnt cookiies ii made before?"

"0h alright," she sighed. "0nly because y0u're my best friend." She kissed his cheek and he felt his yellow blood boil up as he turned.

"Yeah, thank2."

"L3T'S G3T TO COOK1N', G1RL."

"Yes! 0u0"

"D1D YOU JUST DROP SOM3TH1NG 1N THE B4TT3R"

"What d0 y0u mean?" He sighed and snuck back into the living block, burying his face in his hands.

"Dii2a2ter," he groaned. "Ab2olute dii2a2ter."

"Here, Sollux!" Nepeta said, handing him a present. "You can open mine now, to maybe take your mind off of things!" Sollux gave a half smile, taking her present and looking at the tag. "To: Sollux! From: Nepeta :33". He chuckled and tore off the wrapping, hefting the box in his hand and shaking it lightly.

"Iit feel2… 2oft?" He frowned, opening the box and was immediately assaulted by an awful stench, gagging and dropping the box – containing viscera from some disemboweled creature – to the ground, sending Nepeta into fits of giggling.

"YES. HELL YES. WE TOTALLY FUCKING CALLED IT NEPETA, HIGH FIVE." Sollux shook his head holding his nose.

"You two are a22hole2, you know that?" he groaned, leaning back.

"Relaaaaaaaax, four-eyes," Vriska said, clapping his shoulder. "Everything's totally under control. Charge and Scourge are handling food, beefcake in there is fixing old cripple's chair. Everything's great!"

"uH, hEY WAIT"

"Yeah, you're probably riight," Sollux grimaced. "Ii thiink ii'm ju2t goiing to re2t my eyes for a 2econd…" He leaned back into the couch. Suddenly the hive was on fire, people were screaming and-

He jerked forward, panting and sweating, everyone giving him looks.

"Wh- how long wa2 ii out?" he demanded.

"LIKE, A HALF HOUR," Karkat replied. The living room only had Karkat, Nepeta, Tavros, and Gamzee – the others had wandered. "THAT NIGHTMARE WAS INTENSE. YOU ALRIGHT?"

"Yeah, ii'm fiine." He shuddered and stood, stretching. "Ff ii2n't back yet?"

"Nope!" Nepeta replied. "She sent a text though, since you were asleep, and said she was on her way back."

"When wa2 that?"

"MAYBE TEN MINUTES AGO? SHE SHOULD BE ALMOST HERE." There was a doorbell and Sollux froze, jumping up.

"Ii got iit!" he called, just in case. He glanced down at the cooking block as Aradia and Terezi were pulling the cookies from the oven and he bounded to the door, swinging it open.

"Sollux!" she cried, throwing her arms around his neck.

"Haha, hey there fef," he grinned, hugging her back tightly. "How'd the 2hoppiing go?"

"GR-EAT! I got lots of awesome stuff for everymoby! Wanna gat)(er everybody up for present opening?"

"Yeah, hold on," he replied, rushing into the living room, grabbing the empty box under the tree. "Quiick, kk, giive me the riing," he whispered.

"Oooh, ring?" Nepeta squealed softly.

"WHAT? OH, I LET ARADIA SEE IT, I THOUGHT SHE GAVE IT TO YOU ALREADY," Karkat replied.

"What!"

")(-EY everyone!" Feferi came in, and the four greeted her, Sollux shoving the box under his shirt. ")(e)(e, w)(at's t)(at?" she asked.

"Y-your la2t pre2ent," Sollux stammered. "2tay here, don't move!" He rushed down the hall, pulling the box out and forcing it into Aradia's hands. "Put her giift iin here! Quiick!"

"Gift?" Aradia asked, cocking her head. "Um, 0kay?" Sollux swore, moving into the side room where Equius and Eridan were looking over Tavros's wheelchair.

"…so I mean, the hemospectrum is important to recognize, but it doesn't mean wwe wwouldn't be able to havve somethin' red-" Eridan spun to see Sollux. "Wwould you MIND?"

"Fef, pre2ent2, liiviing block," Sollux stammered, sprinting out of the room to the back of the hive, where Vriska, Terezi, and Kanaya were talking.

"Oh, Hello Sollux," Kanaya smiled. "Have A Nice Nap?"

"Yeah iit wa2 great, pre2ent tiime."

"Yes, score!" Vriska grinned as the four ventured back inside. As they passed the cooking block, Aradia pushed the present into his hands.

"I t00k care 0f it," Aradia winked and Sollux gave her a look but shook his head and ushered her into the already crowded living block.

"ALRIIGHT," Sollux sighed, clapping his hands. "Everybody'2 fiinally here. Who 2hould go fiir2t?"

"Me!" Eridan and Vriska demanded simultaneously, shooting each other glares.

"How about Feferi?" Nepeta asked, giving Sollux a grin. "I'm sure she got some purrty exciting gifts!"

"YeAh!"

"DEFINITELY, FEF!"

"OOH 1 WOND3R WH4T SH3 GOT!"

")(a)(a, alright, alright! Let's sea…" She opened her presents in no particular order; first was Aradia's gift: a fossilized shell, then Tavros's gift, a pack of Fiduspawn cards (which Sollux suspected most of them would be opening in their gifts). She got a new shirt, some jewelry, and other miscellaneous gifts. "Last but definitely not least, Sollux? W)(ere's t)(at gift you said you got me?" He bashfully handed her a box.

"Ii-ii don't really know iif you'll liike iit but-"

"O)(, Sollux," she said, smiling confusedly. "Thank you?" He blinked and looked into the box where Aradia had put- a cookie. "It's very sweet. Did you bake t)(ese?"

"N-no- ii mean, what-"

"Ow!" she said, biting into the cookie and immediately recoiling. "W)(at did you put in this?" She frowned and pulled the cookie apart, her eyes widening. "O)(!" Sollux looked and sighed, seeing the ring, glancing to see Aradia giving him a thumbs up and a wide grin. "O)( my gos)(, Sollux, it's… )(oly seacow, it's B-EAUTIFUL…" Sollux slumped into the couch, head back.

"Good… thank god you liike iit…"

"Are you okay, sweetie?"

"Ii thiink… ii'm gonna take a nap now. Iit'2 already been a long chrii2tma2, and iif ii'm gonna 2urviive any more ii need a re2t." She chuckled, leaning over and kissing him softly, making his heart melt.

"You deserve a rest, honeybee." She patted his head and he smiled, drifting off to sleep. He did good.