Note: A bit of Red Cricket for a change. Fear not, we'll be back with Rumbelle next time, but this particular cake was crying out to me and since I already had this shot written, I thought I'd put it up as we haven't had any cake for a while. Warning: A bit risqué, but nothing I'd class above a 12A or PG13 at the cinema.

Summary: Archie, Ruby, chess, and a question that isn't…

Red Velvet Cake

Ruby Lucas could say, with her hand on her heart, that her bed was twelve years old and had never had a man in it. The reason for this was, of course, the fact that she lived with her grandmother, and if there was one thing that made the beautiful and brash Ruby baulk, it was the thought of entertaining male guests in her bedroom whilst her grandmother was asleep at the other end of the landing.

On this particular Monday evening, however, Ruby was not thinking about her grandmother, possibly because said grandmother had gone to the women's institute meeting and then on to bingo, and was going to be out for the majority of the evening. So when Archie had turned up on her doorstep with a bottle of wine, offering to continue her chess lessons (he'd started teaching her the previous day during one of her breaks at the café), Ruby had accepted eagerly. Especially since Archie was rather amenable to the idea of 'the kind of chess where you lose more than pieces'.

Ruby was, unfortunately, not a natural when it came to chess, which explained why she could be found wearing only her bra and knickers whilst Archie was still comparatively fully clothed. They were sitting on the floor of Ruby's bedroom, because Granny had just taken in a mass order of new baking equipment for the café, so the kitchen was full of cake and the living room was full of the utensils used to make it. Despite the fact that they were less than two feet away from her bed and were gradually getting undressed, Ruby was very focused on the game, determined that she would not allow this new concept to best her. She would conquer chess as she conquered everything else in this life: with the force of a rampaging bull. The trouble was, Ruby's philosophy of life had always been to act first and ask questions later. Planning ahead was not a strong point for her, and it was this measure of forethought, or rather lack of it, that had lost her most of her pieces, and her clothes with them.

Archie made his next move, and Ruby spotted her chance, pouncing on her remaining knight and sending it galloping across the board to where Archie's bishop had so carelessly stepped into its path.

"You don't want to do that," Archie said as she took his piece, his voice amused.

"Yes, I do," Ruby countered. "Now, hand over your shirt."

Archie shrugged and did as bid, but Ruby got the distinct impression that he was going to start laughing at her any minute. She scowled. "Are you cheating?"

The psychiatrist shook his head, but then, Ruby wouldn't know if he was or wasn't.

Her eyes narrowed. "Your move."

Archie took her remaining knight without batting an eyelid.

"Checkmate," he said. "You lose the game and, I believe, the rest of your clothes."

Ruby spent several seconds staring at the board, wondering how on earth that had just happened. She'd thought her fortunes were changing, dammit! She looked up and met Archie's eye, grinning wickedly.

"If you want them, you'll have to come and get them,"

The chessboard was somewhat forgotten after that.

X

There was still a good half-hour before Granny would be home, and as Ruby lay in bed in Archie's arms, she couldn't help but feel a certain sense of occasion, that her bed had finally been broken in, so to speak.

"What are you thinking about?" Archie asked presently. "You look like you're miles away."

There were disadvantages to sleeping with a psychiatrist, thought Ruby, twisting the velvet throw between her fingers. They always wanted in when you were lost in thought.

"Nothing really. I was just thinking that you're the first man in this bed."

"Really? Sorry, I didn't mean to sound so surprised, I wasn't implying anything, I swear."

Ruby laughed and pressed her fingers over his lips to silence him.

"It's all right, I know what you mean." She raised one eyebrow suggestively. "It has had other women in it though…"

"It has?" Archie's voice sounded slightly strained, and Ruby had to giggle.

"Yes. Belle a couple of times, Granny on occasion… We don't have a spare bed so people have to bunk up when they stay over."

"Cosy."

"Yes. But it's always been the way, and I don't mind because I benefit in the long run; the business gets left to me. Granny and Grandpa downsized after their kids moved out so they could save up for the catering business and then the café, and that's always been where all the money's gone instead of on a big house. And it went on me when I came to live with them. Grandpa spoilt me rotten. I think that's always the way though, trying to make up for the fact that a six year old doesn't have parents anymore." She rolled onto her stomach and looked at Archie. "You're probably going to tell me that's a recognised psychological condition."

"Well, now you mention it… It's ok, I won't bore you with the details." He paused. "Have you ever thought about moving out?" he asked. "I know it's just been you and Granny for a while now."

Ruby nodded, shook her head, and nodded again.

"I don't know. I'd like to spread my wings, of course I would. It's always a bit weird telling people that I live with my grandmother, and there's nothing I want more than to see the world and do something with my life. But at the same time, she raised me and she's looked after me all this time; now she's slowing down and I don't want to leave her just when she starts needing my help rather than the other way round."

"So you'd rather stay here?"

"Well, not exactly. It's not like I spend all my time here. Half my nights are spent at your house, after all. I just…" Ruby's brow furrowed and she rested her chin on Archie's chest so that she could hold his gaze. "Archie, are you asking me to move in with you?"

"I'm, well, I'm, erm…" He sighed. "I'm trying to work out whether or not it would be a good idea to ask you to move in with me before I actually ask. Because if it's not going to be a good idea then I won't do it."

"Asking is generally a good idea," Ruby said with a smile. "It's normally the response that's problematic."

"Well, that's what I was afraid of. So, if I were to ask, would it be a good idea?"

Ruby sighed and kissed Archie's chest.

"I don't know," she said earnestly. "I would like to move in with you, very much, but I can't give you an answer right now. Can I sleep on it?"

Archie chuckled.

"Of course."

There was a long silence for a while before Ruby spoke again.

"Can I sleep on you?"

X

Ruby was woken next morning by a soft knock on her bedroom door.

"Morning, Ruby," said Granny's voice.

It was only then that Ruby remembered she was lying on top of Archie, who was fumbling on the bedside table for his glasses. She scrambled off him and pulled the blankets up over his head.

"Morning, Granny," she called brightly.

"I wouldn't have disturbed you but it's half-past eight, and Doctor Hopper's appointments usually begin at nine, and if he wants a bacon sandwich before he leaves, then I'm frying now."

"Erm, ok."

Ruby buried her face in the pillow as Archie emerged from under the blankets.

"How did she know I was here?" he hissed.

Just then, the door opened, and Archie drew the covers up to his nose with a yelp. Granny peeped round the doorframe, grinning.

"Your car was parked outside my house when I came in from bingo last night, Doctor, so naturally, I assumed you wouldn't be far away," she said before disappearing downstairs.

Ruby and Archie exchanged looks, and Ruby groaned.

"When can I move in?"

From what I've seen of the show (I haven't seen any of S2 yet), Ruby always gives the impression that she would jump at the chance to leave, but at the same time, this is usually when she's just had an argument with Granny. I wanted to explore her feelings towards the question in more lucid surroundings...

Anyway, hope you enjoyed this little offering, and fear not, for there is plenty of Rumbelle in the pipeline. :)