Note: I do apologise for the lack of cupcakes again. I've just moved for the third time since Christmas and I've not had a mind to write due to stress. And, I've only just got the Internet in my new place, so it's taken a while. But here I am again!
Summary: An unexpected incident occurs on Belle's last day at the café, for an anonymous reviewer who wanted to see Belle and Gold get locked in the fridge at Granny's, and Hermitess on AO3, who wanted to know what Granny's advice from the Carrot Cake epilogue was. Warning – the higher end of the T spectrum, some sex references and innuendo throughout.
Ice Cream Cake
Belle's last day at the café before beginning her new job at the library had gone remarkably well until six o'clock. August had made a little poster that was taped up in the window. Congratulations Belle, it read, and she had seen a flush of pride on seeing it. This is Belle's last day with us here at Granny's before she enters the wide world of library services. Please pop in to join us in wishing her all the best in her career. Signed, Granny, Ruby, Emma and August. She had received several well-wishers who had bought an awful lot of cake, and all in all, she could say that the day had been a success, and whilst she would miss the café and the regulars and the constant banter with Ruby and Emma, Belle knew that she was only moving round the corner, and they would still see each other with alarming regularity.
So Belle's last day at the café had gone remarkably well until six o'clock, when she had found herself unceremoniously locked in the fridge with only the cheese and her lover for company. Gold had come to collect her and had been told by Ruby that she was in the fridge taking stock. Gold had come in to find her, and they had, by some means as yet unknown, been locked in.
Belle, personally, suspected that Ruby had been behind it, and voiced this thought to Gold, even though the other waitress had seemed most repentant when she had asked them through the door if they were all right and had told them not to go anywhere and to hang on until she'd run home to get the spare key from Granny.
"Ruby's been wanting to do this ever since you first turned up," Belle said, her teeth chattering. "I'm not quite sure what she hopes to achieve now, months down the line. She'd always intended to force us to share body heat and in doing so get us to admit our mutual attraction. Since we are now living together and share body heat on a regular basis, I'm not sure what she's going to get out of it now."
Gold wrapped his jacket around her and rubbed her back to try and warm her up.
"Maybe it's because she knows that she's unlikely to ever have the opportunity to lock us in the fridge again?" he suggested. "Or maybe it really was an accident."
"Hmmm." Belle remained unconvinced. "Oh well. We're stuck in here now. How was your day? Has Philip settled in yet.?
"Oh yes. He seems to have taken quite a shine to Dawn, actually." Gold smiled fondly, no doubt at the memory of his new trainee's first meeting with the other young would-be lawyer who worked out of Guildhall. "They'll be hiding under their desks from me together in no time at all."
"You know, something tells me that it is your influence that causes the people around you to hide under their desks," Belle mused. "First Dawn, now Philip."
Gold's reply was non-committal, and he grimaced as he shifted his weight. Belle frowned; it had been barely perceptible unless one had been looking for it, but she had been looking for it. In the last few weeks of living in close proximity, Belle had learned the little tells that showed Gold was in pain, even if he didn't say anything.
"Is it playing up again?" she asked, nodding towards his knee. Gold nodded.
"The cold in here's not helping," he admitted, "but I've been aching all day."
Belle sighed. There were only so many times that the doctors would increase the strength of his prescription, and it seemed that the situation was only getting worse. She didn't like to think of the day when… Belle shook her head and pushed the idea to the back of her mind. Today was a time for celebrating a new phase of her life about to start, not for foreboding thoughts of things that were yet to come.
"Come on," she said brightly, grabbing his arm and pulling him over to the stepladder that she had been standing on to take stock. "Sit down and I'll see if I can't help you out."
Gold did as bid and Belle knelt down between his knees, earning her a raised eyebrow for her troubles. Belle merely rolled her eyes in response and began to press her fingertips into his kneecap, trying to alleviate the dull ache there. She could feel the scar tissue even through his suit trousers, and she sighed inwardly, a sigh that couldn't help turning into a giggle when Gold gave a heartfelt and rather guttural groan of relief. She wondered what it sounded like to the people on the other side of the cold room door. Gold seemed to catch her train of thought.
"What will Granny say when she unlocks the door and comes in to find you on your knees in front of me like this?" he asked.
"She'll probably just leave us to it and tell me to mind her old advice," Belle said. She increased the pressure of her fingertips on his knee and Gold gave a grunt of appreciation.
"Ah yes, Granny Lucas's old advice. I remember. The night of the ball. You never did tell me what it was."
Belle grinned up at him.
"Thankfully, I've never had to put it into practice," she purred.
"I still want to know," Gold said. "I should like to be… prepared."
Belle pressed a kiss to his knee.
"Granny Lucas's old advice to young ladies embarking upon a relationship in the boudoir," she began, "is never to put your mouth between a man's legs unless he's prepared to return the favour."
"Right." Gold's eyebrows shot to his hairline for a moment. "Well, I don't think we need worry about that one."
"Oh no, dear. I did say I'd never needed to put it into practice." Belle fell silent, and gradually her fingers stilled. "Better?"
Gold nodded, and glanced over at the door.
"How long do you think it'll take for Ruby to get us out of here?" he asked.
Belle shrugged.
"I don't know. At least we know that we aren't going to die of starvation."
Gold opened his mouth to reply but Belle held up a hand to stop him, cocking her head on one side to listen. She felt a wicked little grin spread over her features unbidden as she heard footsteps and voices from outside the café, and metal fumbling in locks as someone opened the main café door.
"I think Granny and Ruby are here," she said.
"Fantastic," Gold replied. "Let's get out of here and get warm."
But as the footsteps entered the café, Belle quickly realised that whoever had opened the door was not coming to rescue them. Her brow furrowed, but her grin remained in place.
"Someone's trying to break into the till," she whispered to Gold.
"And you're smiling because?"
"Because they aren't going to succeed."
Gold raised an eyebrow.
"Belle, how on earth are you going to stop them when you're locked in a fridge?" he hissed.
"Well, to start with, Ruby's already emptied the till for the evening and the money's in the safe. And secondly…"
Belle assumed as demure an expression as she could muster, and then let out a breathy scream.
"Yes! Yes! Oh, yes, harder, yes, yes, YES!"
Gold just looked at her as if she'd gone utterly mad, before the same expression came over his face, and he joined in her cacophony with the broad brogue she only ever really heard in the bedroom. Although not usually quite so loudly.
She wasn't quite sure how long they carried on their masquerade before she deemed it time to quieten down.
"Have we scared them off yet?" Gold whispered.
Belle listened.
"I think so."
They stayed silent for a few moments, and Belle jumped out of her skin as there came a sharp rap on the door.
"Are you two quite finished?" asked Granny's voice.
Belle burst out laughing.
"Well, to be honest, we never actually got started, Mrs Lucas," Gold called. "Please let us out, I'm freezing and my knee's seized up."
"Have you gone stiff?" Ruby's voice asked, barely masking her giggling.
Gold rolled his eyes. "I'm not going to grace that with a reply, Ruby."
The door scraped open and Belle found herself face to face with Granny, who was looking unimpressed, with Ruby doing an uncanny Cheshire cat impression beside her. Graham was standing outside the café talking to a young man in black who was looking extremely shellshocked.
"Well, at least you caught a petty thief into the bargain," Granny said.
"Oh, the expression on his face was priceless," Ruby said, gesturing towards the would-be burglar. "We came in to find him standing behind the till just gawping in the direction of the fridge. I think you've scarred him for life. It really was beautiful to behold." She paused. "You know, you two have just given me an excellent idea for a new burglar alarm system."
"Although if I find any evidence of you going in flagrante behind the tomatoes," Granny continued, "there will be hell to pay. Not only is it unhygienic, I do not take kindly to having my stock destroyed in moments of passion. Remember, chocolate frosting might seem like a good idea at the time, but believe me, cleaning up afterwards is a nightmare."
Belle and Ruby burst out laughing as Gold shook his head in despair. Thankfully, he had got used to Granny and Ruby, or Belle might have been worried for the effect that such comments would have had on him.
The thief outside, however, merely whimpered on catching this tail end of the conversation. Belle had to smile at his discomfiture. Perhaps being locked in the fridge had its benefits after all.