Of Preparations

A heavy and deep sighed echoed through the War Room scant seconds after it opened and closed. Cullen looked up from the reports that came in that day and night to see just who decided to seek refuge in their strategy room. He watched with equal parts amusement and concern when he saw the Herald leaning her forehead against the door she just closed. "A bit late for a briefing, wouldn't you say, Herald?"

She rolled her head to the side to look his way, never fully removing it from the door. "Oh, you know me, always causing trouble." He caught the side of her smile and noticed just how tired it still seemed.

He stepped away from the War Table as she finally left the door. "Sorry, I didn't realize anyone would still be in here this late." She paused, and he could almost see a teasing lilt overtake the tiredness in her voice and smile. "Do you ever sleep, Commander?"

He chuckled and leaned against the table. "I could ask the same of you. Here you've just returned this afternoon, and are to leave first thing in the morning for Therinfal Redoubt. Yet, here we are."

"I just…" She stopped, catching herself it seemed. He caught her little slip-up and watched her cheeks flush just enough to know she knew he noticed. "I couldn't sleep. I'm worried about tomorrow." A half-lie, he could tell. He was sure she couldn't, but not for the reason she said, not fully.

"Of course," he said. "We are sending you in rather blind. I wish it wasn't so." But he wouldn't call her on her lie. While he had a feeling—or rather, had the hope—they could at least be called friends, maybe not good friends, he also understood the need to keep some things to oneself. It would be rather hypocritical of him to call her on her own lies and omissions when he did the same thing. Even now, only three other people knew of his decision and struggle with lyrium withdrawal, his own reason for being awake at the moment.

She sighed and walked over to him, leaning over the table. "I only wish we knew what to expect there. What the Lord Seeker is thinking."

"Yes. On the one hand, we have mages in forced servitude to Tevinter. And on the other, Templars being led by a Lord Seeker who has changed his position and viewpoints rather quickly and drastically, doing who knows what else. They're not quite the choices we had hoped for, with either group." He observed her from his peripherals, noticing how she still hadn't fully relaxed. If anything, she tensed even more. At least, he never claimed to be the best at comforting others. Unfortunately, there was no training for that in the Order.

"Both sides are desperate," she said after a moment too long of quiet contemplation. He made a noise of agreement; that much had become obvious weeks ago when she first encountered both sides in Val Royeaux. "And I have an awful feeling that after tomorrow, we'll know just how desperate."

"Leliana has forward scouts surrounding the area around Haven, and I have my own closer to the village. If anyone, mage or Templar, comes here, we'll know it. And be able to plan accordingly." He leaned closer and placed a hand on her shoulder; it was the best comfort he could give her without pushing the boundaries of their relationship. And when she leaned into his touch, he couldn't deny the swell of happiness he felt.

"Maker, I hope so." She sighed again, but made no effort to move away.

"You should get some rest, Herald. You've a big day ahead," he said. He moved his hand away finally, after it seemed a moment too long. To him, at least. There was no way he wanted her to think he was trying to take advantage of her, or that he was even thinking about what she might think. Never mind that he wasn't doing such a thing at all.

He heard her push away from the table, and he did as well. Then, she moved quicker than he thought she could and stood in front of him. "Thank you, Commander." And there was that smile again: the one too wide, too soft, and showing hints of teeth. He didn't quite know what to make of it, but couldn't ignore the softness to it. A flush started to show and he cleared his throat, looking away.

"Come, I'll walk you back to your home." He hoped she didn't notice just how uncomfortable that was for him to say. Because there was a huge chance she would misinterpret the reason why; he was sure he was misinterpreting the reason why.

"If you're sure," she said, her smile falling as quick as it came. And sadly, he didn't feel as relieved as he thought he would be.

"I am." He walked around her to open the door, holding it open for him. "Besides, you're on the way."

They walked side-by-side through the Chantry and Haven, enjoying the quiet stillness of the night. Neither knew that that would be the first and last time he would get to walk her to the home she had been given, or that their quiet peace and normalcy would be shattered all because of one disastrous trip to Therinfal Redoubt.

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