"If you find a girl who reads, keep her close.
When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her.
You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you.
She'll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are.
Date a girl who reads because you deserve it.
You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable.
If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you're better off alone.
If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads."
2 AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake,
"Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?,
I don't love him.
Winter just wasn't my season"
Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes
Like they have any right at all to criticize,
Hypocrites. You're all here for the very same reason
'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button, girl.
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe... just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe
May he turned 21 on the base at Fort Bliss
"Just a day" he said down to the flask in his fist,
"Ain't been sober, since maybe October of last year."
Here in town you can tell he's been down for a while,
But, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles,
Wanna hold him. Maybe I'll just sing about it.
Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table.
No one can find the rewind button, boys,
So cradle your head in your hands,
And breathe... just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe
There's a light at each end of this tunnel,
You shout 'cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out
And these mistakes you've made, you'll just make them again
If you'd only try turning around.
2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,
Threatening the life it belongs to
And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd
Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you'll use them, however you want to
But you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button now
Sing it if you understand.
and breathe, just breathe
woah breathe, just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe.
~Breathe (2AM)~
Anna Nalick
"I feel like a shower where I just sit there and clench my knee's, Jake."
Bursting out in laughter, I pushed the laughing Jake over - rolling my eyes as I huffed, crossing my arms in front of my chest as I wiped the small grains of sand off my feet. "Jake, this isn't funny. It was horrible."
That only fuelled Jacob more into the land of laughs, a land in which I wished we didn't visit so often yet it seemed like we were frequent visitors, and I sighed, grabbing a ball of sand and chucking it at him - determined to make him cry.
Make him cry?
A bit psychotic today, are we?
Yep.
He roared with laughter as the ball of sand crumbled as it touched him and I sighed, shaking my head as I turned away from him - not allowing him to see that his laughter was rubbing off on to me, and the smile on my face being evidence of that could not be seen by the man I was trying to have a serious, diplomatic conversation.
Diplomatic conversation?
With Jacob.
Yeah, okay.
Reaching a bit high, aren't we?
Could you please stop insulting my boyfriend!
Boyfriend.
Boyfriend.
Holy shit - I have a boyfriend.
A hot, sex god boyfriend.
Holy shit.
Holy shit.
Holy mother fucking shit.
I think I'm having a nervous breakdown.
A huge, mega nervous breakdown.
Well, you do talk to your conscience - it was bound to happen.
Fuck off.
I felt warm arms encircle my waist and I sighed in the warmth, leaning back into his heat encompassed chest where I almost felt at home, while warm kisses were being traced up the crook of my neck to my jaw line - the kisses leaving their imprint as my skin flushed were his lips had been. "That's unfair, Jake, you can't use your kissing powers against me."
"Why not?" He whispered in my ear and I shrugged, turning around to face him.
Putting my slender hands in his newly cut hair, I smiled - biting my lip lightly s I wrapped my hand around a wet, black strand - almost mesmerised by the brilliance of his hair. "Because you have an unfair advantage!" I protested and he smirked.
"Are my kissing skills really that amazing?"
I pushed him away with my foot and he chuckled. "Pfft, no."
Don't even try to lie.
He can see right through it.
And your a crap liar.
Laughter gone, the only remaining evidence of his laughing fit was that of a small, goofy smile that rested on his lips - contrasting with his wet, copper skin.
I looked down at mine, sighing at my now ivory complexion - against his, it was almost alien. "What did he say?"
"Charlie?" I asked and Jake nodded. "Jake, it was horrible." I said, shaking my head as I thought of the events that had traumatised and permanently scarred me for rest of my sane life. "He sat me down, and began talking to me about Chlamydia and Crabs. And then, because I couldn't get what he was saying, he drew a picture of a guy, urgh, having quite the good time and then when I told him I had already had the sex talk numerous, well, to be precise - four times - and I didn't need it, he just nodded and started to walk off - mumbling something like 'Bella was never like this'."
At the mention of her name, Jake became rigid - almost as if I was going to whip him although I'm pretty sure if the situation were i was going to whip Jacob Black ever came about, he would rather enjoy my whipping him.
I sighed at his sudden change of mood, and I looked out to the beach - holding my knee's close to my chest as I pondered over whether to ask him or not. To open the gates to unlimited awkwardness and 'I'm not ready to talk'.
Should I ask him about her? Obviously something had happened in the past, like maybe she stole something from him or maybe she rejected him - I had no idea what had made him harbour such animosity towards my cousin, the one I had known to be very quiet and usually quite a bore in most situations.
Ask him.
This isn't up to you.
It is if it has anything to do with your welfare.
My WHAT? You told me to go die the other day, I'm pretty sure you've fucked up my welfare.
Whatever - just ask him. I'm curious.
Your curious about everything. Just because your curious, doesn't mean I'm going to go jump off a bridge or rob a store to satisfy your annoyingly inappropriate curiosity.
INAPRPROPRIATE? You hit Jacob with your car! And then talked about your dead hamster to his father, a grieving widower.
YOUR FUCKING INAPPROPRIATE!
No need to shout, conscience, I can hear you just fine.
Well, will you be able to hear me when I climb out of your ears and put a TV antenna so far up your ass you won't ever be able to feel any sensation down there again.
Why TV antenna?
I thought it was appropriate for the situation.
Oh, okay.
After having a well needed argument with my conscience, I decided not to ask Jacob about Bella - the illusive one who seemed more unlike my cousin the more I heard about her. Yet she was someone who he obviously can't stand to be mentioned, let alone sit down and conversing about his woes about her.
Maybe she crashed his car, or something. He does have bad luck with cars.
Maybe.
Or maybe they fucked and she never called him again.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
I could feel the nausea churn in my stomach at just the thought of something so gruesome, so personal as ... that. I had never been more disgusted at my thoughts, nor had I ever been so upset about the thought of anyone fucking Bella.
But him.
Jacob.
My nudist ... fucking Bella.
It just, it couldn't be a possibility.
Biting my lip, I turned to at Jake - who almost looked like he was having a silent battle within himself and I moved over to him - grabbing his hand and he turned to me, his furrowed eyebrows relaxing and his shoulders slumping.
"Sorry," He said coarsely, ruffling his hair. "I was out of it."
I nodded as he wrapped a warm arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer to him. "Tired?"
He nodded. "I had patrol all of last night."
"Patrol? What the hell is patrol?" I asked, my eyebrows furrowing.
Was that some kind of neighbourhood watch, or something Did they wear those fluorescent yellow tops that had 'neighbourhood patrol' on the back of them. Maybe he fought crimes.
Like what? Seeing where little Lucy left her lollipop?
No.
More like finding missing dogs, and shooing away animals.
Oh, and finding rapists and stuff just strolling the streets - as they do.
He turned to me, his features flashing for one second before his cool, and collected face returned as he shrugged nonchalantly. "Urgh, well, it's just this thing that me and the guys do. Something to just keep the Rez safe from ... anything."
"Like axe wielding serial killers?" I asked, chuckling and he laughed.
"Yeah. Like axe wielding serial killers."
We sat in a comfortable silence, a silence that oddly enough I didn't feel the need to fill with my ramblings about how I eat apples or how I tie my shoes. It seemed like we were at home with each other. A moment passed before he stood, helping me up with a broad smile on his face - all his feelings of animosity wiped from his features.
"Want to go to mine?"
I nodded, heading in the direction where Jacob was headed and I felt my breath hitch in my hand a Jacob enclosed my hand with his - intertwining our fingers. His warm, and rugged while mine were slender and nails bitten.
They almost looked clumsy next to his perfect ones.
"Why do you always wear this ring?" He asked, and I looked down to the pearl ring that sat on my index finger - scratched and run down.
I sighed, smiling at it. "I found it when I was four in Great Aunt Ethel's drug cabinet and I stole it. I've worn it as a trophy since, just to annoy that bitch."
"You ... don't like your Aunt?"
I shook my head slightly. "Nope. She told me I was unwanted, and a bastard child of two irresponsible people who wanted to have a kid. Plus, she hates my mum for marrying my dad."
"Why?"
I shrugged. "Mom and Dad got married two weeks before I was born, and met ten months before I was born. Mom said it was love at first sight, while Dad has a rather different telling of the story. They were both hammered beyond belief and I'm sure my mother couldn't even see his face properly. Plus my dad is about twenty years or twenty one years older than my mom - so her family try to avoid us now."
"So, how old was your dad when he had you?"
I bit my lip. "41 or 39."
"What about your mom?"
"19." I said, and he gaped.
"And they're still together?"
I nodded. "Yep. I blame them for how I turned out - all awkward and stuff. It's mainly they're fault - they are from two different generations. You know, I used to think it was just for me, but I don't know. They're kind of, well, in love."
Jacob smiled. "That's kinda nice."
"I have the room next to them. It's not nice."
Jacob cringed, laughing as he opened the door and I shivered as I got out of the cold - even though Jake was keeping me warm and toasty.
Wow, I really want some toast.
"Hi, Billy." I said as I saw him, flicking through the abundance of channels and he turned around - smiling.
"Hey, Anna. " Billy turned to Jacob. "Sam's looking for you."
Jacob shrugged. "When isn't he."
And then I saw it.
Scrabble.
Ah, this is destiny.
"Okay, who's scrabble game is that?"
Billy smiled. "Mine. Do you play?"
I scoffed at the thought of me just playing.
I was the champion.
Literally - I have a trophy to prove it.
It's on my first shelf in my bedroom.
I polish it every week.
It even has my name on it.
No wonder you have no friends.
And still a virgin.
Your such a loser.
"Billy, say hello to the Scrabble champion of the shorebird retirement village of #05."
Billy's eyes darkened. "Sit down, Ms Swan. Prepare your ass to be kicked."
This guy's serious.
As am I.
I can beat him.
Easy.
I will dominate him.
Try to beat him without sounding like a sex domination prostitute.
Is that even a thing?
My eyebrows furrowed in concentration, I heard a sigh behind me as my eyes flickered up to Billy's smirking face - a smirking face I would dominate. My fingers twitching, I heard another sigh and I sighed.
"Jake. Please. Shhh."
Billy cocked a brow. "Stuck?"
I put my finger up, shaking my head as I tried concentrating before I felt a warm hand on my back, my head immediately snapping up. Lips touching the back of my neck, I hissed in annoyance as I felt my resolve crumbling.
Fuck.
My.
Life.
Balls.
Crap.
Fuckity fuck fuck.
"Stop," I hissed, pushing him away as I tried to focus on the game in front of me.
But he didn't stop.
Eh.
And I repeat, Eh.
Eh bloody Eh!
I stood, looking back to a beaming Billy and I smiled apologetically. "I'm sorry, Billy, but my ass will have to be kicked another time."
Billy nodded and I grabbed Jakes hand, dragging him out of the house and I turned - slamming him against the side of the house and I pointed my finger at his chest, my eyes narrowed as I tried to focus not on his beautiful, pleading eyes - but the fact that anger happened to be my reason for trying to yell at him.
"That was in front of your father, Jacob Richard Black!" I hissed, pocking him. "You lip fucked my neck while your father was sitting across from me! Are you fucking serious?"
Jacobs eyebrows furrowed, trying to hide his smile as he shook his head lightly. "My middle names not Richard-"
"I don't give a flying fuck what your middle name is, Jacob nameless Black, but if I ever am playing scrabble with your father again - if I can even look him in the face - you will stay a distance of five feet away from us both and fuck, Jake, please," I said, grabbing his face and I pointed it to mine - getting his attention. "Are you even paying attention?"
His eyes were averted, and he cleared his throat as he pressed his lips to my forehead before stripping off his shirt and running into the woods.
I turned around, raising my arms in the air.
"Really? Again?"
Sorry I haven't updated - I had some stuff I had to do.
Anyways, some of you have been wonderin why haven't go a Beta - simple reason is this.
I have contacted about twenty, and none have replied. Absolutely none. So if any of you know a good Beta, or you know, are up to editing this story - that would be great. I'm finishing school in a couple days, so they'll be alot more updates.
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