"People always think that the most painful thing is losing the one you love in your life.
The truth is, the most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving
someone too much, forgetting that you are special too."
~Unknown~
Help, I have done it again
I have been here many times before
Hurt myself again today
And, the worst part is there's no-one else to blame
Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me
Ouch I have lost myself again
Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found,
Yeah I think that I might break
I've lost myself again and I feel unsafe
Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me
Be my friend H
old me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me
~Breathe Me~
Sia
"What are you doing out here?"
I sighed as I felt warm arms encircle my waist, smiling lightly, before turning around - facing Jake. "I just had to take a phone call. Hey," I said, smiling. "Do you mind if I take off? There's just some things I needed to do."
Jakes brow furrowed. "I thought you wanted to raid Emily's fridge?"
I smiled, running my hands through his hair. "I do. Later. Do you mind dropping me off at your house - my cars there."
Jake nodded, his warm hand coming up and cupping my face. "Do you have to leave? Can't you do that stuff later?"
I nodded.
Think of a lie.
Now.
Lie.
STOP PRESSURING ME!
"It's important, Jake." I exclaimed, my hands coming down to his chest as I made sure he couldn't weaken my resolve. "Please?"
I got out of the rabbit, running a hand through my hair as I saw my car and I bit my lip - my nerves acting up as I tried to contain the fact that I was lying.
I went over to my car, smiling as I got in - looking up to Jake. "I'll call you later, okay?"
He nodded, before looking into my car. "You know, you should bring this to the shed one day. I could fix it up."
I cocked a brow. "Are you, Jacob Black, insinuating that my ride is a shit hole?"
He nodded and I pushed him away, sliding my key into its hole.
Hehe, hole.
Someone's mature today.
"Good bye, Tarzan." I said dryly and he leant in once again, giving me a soft kiss.
Oh, fuck seeing Bella - stay with Jake.
He released me, and I licked my lips - the taste of chocolate muffin still on my lips and I smiled, before heading out of La Push. Of course it took a while - with my car being ancient, and all.
I drove into the long, torturous drive - preparing myself for anything. Bella had sounded urgent, almost panicked.
I'm assuming she is dying.
From some kind of tropical disease.
Original.
The Cullen residence was just how I remembered it, yet today - the extravagance and celebration of a wedding seemed like decades ago, the only reminder being my memories.
And the fact I still have blisters on my feet from those fucking heels.
I had come to the conclusion that heels were manufactured in hell.
Don't let the labelling fool you - it's hell.
I got out of my car, grabbing my parka and I jumped up the steps - thanking all that is sacred that I no longer wore that heels - and I knocked lightly on the door, shocked to see that the illusive Dr. Cullen, a man whom I heard that Jessica girl gossiping about, answer the door - a grim expression on his perfect, god like face.
I wonder what moisturiser he uses.
Or plastic surgeon - either one.
My eyes furrowed. "She's not in an incubator, is she? Or a giant, glass hamster ball that she'll have to live the remainder of her life in?"
Carlisle let a small smile pass him before chuckling, shaking his head as he lead me up the stairs. "No."
And then I saw her.
She's not dying - what a liar!
She never said she was dying, shit for brains.
She smiled and I walked over to her, eyeing the people that watched me as if I was some kind of venomous snake - just waiting until I strike. And then there was the blonde one, Ross or something, looking at me like I was fucking Hitler recarnated.
God, I forgot how weird these people are.
"Bell's," I said, plopping down on the couch next to her and she beamed. "You sounded weird on the phone? If your dying, you can tell me - I know what it's like."
No you don't.
Will you shut up while I am trying to relate!
She smiled, shaking her head.
She looks tired.
And worn out.
I guess all that fucking really did-
Could you please stop - I am trying to focus on not vomiting up my stomach lining.
"I'm not dying, Anna."
I heard a scoff, and then a hushed mutter. "Might as well be."
I cocked a brow. "What's going on, Bell's?"
She bit her lip, looking over to Edmund and I narrowed my eyes - leaning into her. "If they're keeping you here prisoner, and they have like a sex dungeon or something - I carrying a taser. "
What is with you and sex dungeon?
Is that the conclusion you always go to?
I can't help the weird wonders of my brain.
I heard a bellowingly laugh, one I remembered all to well and I narrowed my eyes. "Shut it, Schwarzenegger. Go eat some steroids!"
"You know, I prefer to be called Emmett - been hanging around dogs lately, Anna?"
Dogs?
Like Mutts.
Well, there was that girl Jessica.
Ha-hardy-ha-ha.
I ignored his comment, and looked back to Bella - cocking my eyebrows. "What's going on?"
And then they told me.
I jumped up, my eyes wide. "I KNEW IT! I KNEW YOU WERE FUCKING WEIRD!"
Vampires.
Real Vampires.
They're probably on meth, Anna, they're not real vampires.
Well, I'm not going to ask them to prove it - I prefer my blood!
Oh, god - Bella married Dracula!
Bella married Dracula.
Damn it, I guess we no longer have a shot.
Shut up!
I couldn't believe this - Vampires!
Vampires!
Are you just going to keep repeating it, or...
I'm really, really not in the mood conscience.
My mouth hung open in shock as I realised that these people, these creatures, the inhumanely beautiful creatures had lured Bella into their lair, and had brainwashed her, were creatures of the night and darkness.
And they were going to suck her blood.
And drain her.
This isn't possible, Anna, they're joking - it's a practical joke.
It's a fucking cruel practical joke!
And then I saw them all looking at me.
Like they were expecting something.
Go get some onions.
See how they handle it.
"Can I please have some onions?"
And then the laughter ensued.
Well, only by one person who soon got a beating across the head.
You know who that is.
And then I looked back at Bella, my hyper ventilation starting. "This isn't real. This can't be - I, it goes against everything - it's not, It can't-"
It took them about an hour to calm me down.
I looked at Bella, my eyebrows furrowing. "Your married to a mythical creature, Bell's, is that why you call me over here?"
She shook her head. "No."
"Well, why did you?" I demanded, angered. "What are you trying to do, Bella, give me a heart attack - stop with the suspense!"
"I'm pregnant," She blurted out, and I went rigid.
What.
The.
Fuck.
Is.
Going.
On.
"With Edward's baby," She said, pointing to Edward and I looked over to him - my mouth dropping open.
Pregnant?
With child?
Bella's an incubator?
Oh, holy fuck.
"So, what will it be, like a half vampire mutant thing?"
I think her name was Rosalie stepped forward, her eyes flashing. "It'll be a baby. It's just a baby,"
That's half vampire.
And has fangs.
Wait, do they have fangs?
"Wait, do you guys have fangs?"
Emmett chuckled, opening his mouth as he shook his head - no fangs in sight.
Okay, so they have no fangs.
That's a plus, I guess.
My eyebrows furrowed as I leant back in the couch, looking to Bella. "So, what will the baby do - come flying out your vagina as a bat with a mini cape on?"
Bella chuckled, shrugging. "I don't know."
Okay.
She didn't know.
"Has there ever been anything like this?"
Carlisle shook his head. "No. We've been conducting research, but it seems there is no documented evidence."
Yeah, now that I think about it - I've never seen any half vampire demon spawns.
They must be uncommon.
"And I can't see Bella anymore." The pixie said and I remembered, vaguely, that they had explained about they're special, urgh, 'gifts'.
More like mutations.
"How do you know your pregnant though?" I asked, shaking my head. "Maybe your not, maybe-"
Bella grabbed my hand, hers colder than the ones I'm used to, and she placed it on her swollen abdomen - my face distorting in shock as I felt it.
A kick.
A familiar kick.
"Oh, my god." I whispered, going closer to Bella as I put both my hands on her stomach - feeling the baby kick away. "Bella,"
It was just a baby.
A small, innocent baby.
"I need you, Anna. No one else but you and Rose will understand." She said, her glassy eyes glistening with unshed tears. "They want to kill my baby, Anna. They want to take it away." She bit her lip, shaking her head as she sobbed.
I shook my head. "Bella, stop crying. It's not good for the baby."
"The foetus is not good for Bella!"
I looked to Alice, and I narrowed my eyes. "You really don't know her then."
Esme came over to Bella but Rose was there first, her eyes flashing as she took a protective stance over Bella. "It's okay, Rose. Esme won't hurt us."
Esme moved past her adoptive daughter, sitting down on the couch next to me and she offered Bella a sandwich.
Yet before Bella could even swallow the bit she had taken, it came back up - in a violent display of morning sickness. Edward stepped forward, but was stopped by Rose - while I held her hair back and grabbed the bucket that sat just beside the couch.
Rubbing her back, I bit my lip.
Holy shit.
Next thing you know - they'll be fucking witches and goblins.
And maybe Harry Potter might come for a fucking visit.
"I think it's a boy," Bella whispered, a bright smile on her face as I finished braiding her hair - any sign of vomit gone.
The rest of the ... Family went off to different parts of the house, leaving us alone and I was grateful for that - they're watching eyes were almost to painful to bear.
I raised my eyebrows. "A boy?"
She nodded. "I'm having these dreams. I know it's a boy."
I smiled. "People can be wrong, Bell's. I'll bet you a million dollars its a girl."
She turned to me, scoffing. "You don't have a million dollars."
"I will when I take over the world,"
She smiled, leaning back in the couch and she rested her hands on her slightly protruding abdomen. "Do you think I'm doing the right thing, Anna?"
I bit my lip. "If you think it is. But you know there's always other alternatives-"
She shook her head. "No. There are no other options."
I nodded. "Okay. Well your doing the right thing then."
Bella sighed, looking at me. "So, how long are you staying for?"
"Well," I said, biting my lip. "A couple more days but I'll prolong my visit. How's three months sound?"
She smiled, nodding. "That's good."
We sat in silence for a moment before I bit my lip. "You know, a lot has changed since you left."
Her eyebrows furrowed. "What do you mean?"
"I have a boyfriend." I said, beaming and her eyes widened.
"Who!" She exclaimed. "Is it Mike Newton?"
I shook my head, ignoring the fact that my stomach churned at the mention of him. "No. His name is Jacob Black."
Her eyes widened as she shook her head. "My Jacob?"
I had heard her say his name before, I had heard it.
And then I remembered.
Everything.
"Thank you," Someone said into the darkness, and it was near me. "This is very… kind of you."
"Kind is my middle name," a husky voice, a voice so brilliantly wonderful I wanted to melt when I heard every pronunciation drip from his mouth. "Can I cut in?"
"Jacob!" Someone chocked, their voice sounding urgent and jubulis . "Jacob!"
"Hey there Bell's."
Oh, my god.
That was him?
That was him?
And then I remembered it - all of it.
I had seen the wolves that night, I had seen them! It was Jacob.
Oh, my god.
How could I had forgotten this? How could I have-How could I have dismissed the conversation I had eavesdropped on. How did I miss that?
And then I remembered why I drunk so much that night - why I had tried to block out what I had seen.
I had seen wolves.
I had heard Jake talk about them.
"He's a good kid. Better company than some. I tell you, if I could get rid of the voices in my head, being a wolf would be about perfect."
Excuse me while I faint.
Here is another chapter for you all!
Hope it is good enough and yes, Anna will stay with Bella throughout the pregnancy.
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