Scent of the swordsman on his bed, the metal smell Sanji came to love. The children at the dojo, the curious ones who constantly asked him questions about Zoro. And his favorite spot next to the window, where they had both meditated. Everything held a memory, vivid ones that drove him insane.

And each day passed by so sluggishly.

Since Zoro's leave, the blond was filled with anxiety, so much that it began to affect his eating and sleeping patterns. Sanji lost pounds rapidly since he wasn't eating the proper amount of calories everyday, which was a real embarrassment for a chef, but it wasn't his cooking that was off, it was his appetite. And regularly, like the unwashed shirts and jeans he wears, he began to wear bags under his eyes daily because a terrible friend of his had revisited, a friend named insomnia.

In the past, he had chronic insomnia, and the year that it prolonged became the worst part of his life. It was right after the escape from the organization, in the beginning of Baratie's business.

With this disorder, his personality changed due to it, made him more aloof and spiteful. He could not learn new things, such as cooking, when his mind was always in a trance, never being in the moment, never really caring that he wasn't living. He went through everyday like a lifeless being, with his heavy set eyes and lethargic body.

It was all because he was afraid of falling asleep, of having nightmares about the death of his parents and screaming in terror, disoriented that his skin had dissolved to leave him as bones.

Zeff worried for him, talked to him during nights to help Sanji fall asleep, and eventually placed him under sleep therapy when they hardly had any extra money (since this was before their business skyrocketed.) Knowing this, that the old geezer was risking financial problems for him, Sanji pulled himself together and did everything to fall asleep every night.

And it worked.

Well, after undergoing the sleep therapy for a few months, the disorder didn't completely disappear, it was just not as often.

It had always been lurking behind the shadows, waiting for a chance like this to make its shape again. Before Zoro's leave, the blond would sometimes wake up in the middle of the night with sweat dripping from his forehead, panting from fear of his nightmares; after the leave, those nights became an everyday occurrence.

Sanji promised himself to never trace back to that part of his life, yet here he was finding himself unable to sleep again.

No longer was he kept awake by his parents' deaths or the starvation he experienced, now it was this sort of nervous energy in his gut that prevented him from falling asleep. Even when his eyes drooped with tiredness, his mind refused to shut down.

When Zoro told him not to call, of course he did it anyways, but quickly found out that the swordsman had blocked his number. So by running into one of the D brothers, he hoped to have an accidental meeting with Zoro and apologize over and over for that kiss, then he discovered that they had both quit after a single day of working at the dojo because of boredom. Then his hope shifted to the bar Zoro took him that one night. Sanji casually took a stroll to the bar one night and asked around for the noisy group, but the bartender told him that he hadn't seen them in awhile, so it resulted as a fruitless effort.

Why is that fucker running away from me? he wondered, bitter and resentful after realizing that the swordsman was avoiding Sanji with all his might.

He was so desperate, enough to visit the hospital where Chopper worked, but again, found that Chopper was in a foreign country as a medical assignment. So fucking convenient, it all was. With each attempt, it seemed, that it was a failure, and the rocks in the blond's gut built. The rocks of unease at the thought of never seeing Zoro again, and regret— why did I have to kiss the man?

Sanji wanted to see Zoro again, wanted to hear those snarky remarks from that grouchy tone of voice, wanted those rough fights that always set him on fire, wanted to converse with the man and have a cup of rum and laugh with him.

He held one last string of hope and that was the kendo teacher at the dojo, one who worked with Zoro in the organization. Just one more time, he would plead, just one last time let me see that marimo head. Then, even if the tatted man extracts his sword at him, Sanji would not falter, would not even blink an eye. He would say, please do grant my wish before you kill me. Of course, that's a load of shit. Sanji would high kick the tatted man across the room before he could lay a finger on his blond head.

But still, he'll thank the man before going off to Zoro.

Sanji walked into the room after he had finished his own lesson with the children, casual with his hands tucked inside his pockets.

Either the man did not notice him or simply decided not to acknowledge him, it was unknown. The blond awkwardly stood on the side, waiting for their eyes to meet, and when it did after a couple of minutes, he impulsively jumped on the question without wasting another dreadful second.

"Do you know where I could find Zoro?" he asked, impatiently.

"Zoro?" Law questioned as though he did not recognize the name. "Did something happen?"

"Kind of, I screwed up and he told me not to contact him again, but I just want to apologize, shit, can you help?" All that plan with the pleads and begs, it just wasn't his thing. Maybe he'll force it out of the kendo teacher.

The man scrunched up his face rather than smirking or whatever the devilish man did, he told Sanji, "Sorry, I can't help. Mr. 1 recently quit his job, after all, and we're not the closest friends."

Sanji blinked. "What?"

"I figured you already knew since it had been few weeks since."

The blond was still in shock and vexed that his last chance was slipping out under him. "No," he said, firmly. "I didn't realize at all." He didn't give a shit whether the swordsman quit his night time job as an assassin or whatnot, what he cared about was that the final hope that connected him to Zoro was cut.

"Thanks," he said to Law before stomping out of the dojo.

As he was lying on his bed, unable to fall asleep, he thought of the swordsman and how they had gotten so close in only a single week (A week!). But simultaneously, this torture, this obsession, this disorder, was Zoro really worth the downfall of his own life? Of course not, he still had to live, content or not, what other choice did he have?

But... he needed a closure... A real closure...

He needed to see Zoro again.

He'll need to head over to Kuina's place.

The blond rented a car from his old geezer, whom bonked his head when they met again, it was his way of expressing his love (as Sanji had learned over the years, the hard way). Zeff seemed a bit worried from Sanji's disheveled appearance, but the blond excused himself by telling his old man that he'd been busy with finding a new job and partying every night with friends, some bullshit like that. It was clear that Zeff saw through the lie but didn't question it.

He turned on the engine, pondering whether his planned actions were wrong.

Heading over to Kuina's, using a woman so he could have a chat with her boyfriend about a kiss they shared. It sounded almost surreal, like they were all in a parallel universe where everything was fucked up and bizarre. I kissed your boyfriend, he would say, then she would respond, you fucking slut. Or does that only happen between women in dramatic television shows?

Sanji sat there, thinking whether he should do this. There were logical sides to this, but his instinct was persuading him to do it, to fix the relationship between them, to fix Sanji.

He pressed the pedal with his foot and allowed himself to be carried away.

When are you going to move, goddammit!

Sanji had been stuck in traffic for about twenty minutes now. Apparently, as cops informed him, there was some loose criminal in front. He didn't really give ten fucks, all he wanted was to see Zoro already. Perhaps he should apologize to the two of them by cooking up a meal, tell them sorry I disturbed your relationship and that he won't kiss Zoro ever again. They'll just sleep on the same bed and fight like an old married couple and drink alcohol like buddies who've known each other for years, the stuff they'd already done.

Click... click...

The blond frowned, what is that noise?

When he whipped his head around, he realized that the car door in the back had opened and that a man with a stringy beard had entered his car, with sunglasses covering his eyes and a rag-like hat on his head, and also holding a gun next to Sanji's blond head. "Don't make any noise," the criminal grunted, but with a panicky tone, holding a large square bag that was filed with loads and loads of stacked cash in his other hand.

What shitty luck, Sanji thought as he rolled his eyes. Of all the cars out there, the criminal had to choose his.

With such little space and apprehension of damaging his old man's car, Sanji couldn't help but to oblige to the man's demands. But that didn't mean he was afraid, rather, he was at ease knowing that he could easily take out the criminal if he wanted to, just didn't want the deflected bullet to fire at the window.

"I'm going to hide, you tell those cops that I'm not here, you hear? One suspicious gesture and I'll blow your head out."

Sanji yawned, "Whatever."

There was more threat from Luffy than this piece of joke.

The criminal ducked behind the seat and crouched as low possible, pressing the muzzle of his gun against the blond's side as a threat.

As the tense minutes trickled by, Sanji stared out the window, seeing hills and heavy dark clouds hanging over them, darkening the ground as though a storm was approaching. He reached inside his pocket and pulled out a stick of cigarette, lit it up with his lighter, then took a profound wisp of smoke into his lungs.

"Hey, can I have one of that?"

The blond squinted his eyes. What a strange situation he was in but humorous simultaneously, when a criminal who was threatening him was asking for a cigarette in a casual tone of voice. What a funny man.

"Maybe if you take that gun away, that'll be helpful," Sanji suggested because it was starting to poke at his ribs.

When he felt the muzzle loosen from his side, he threw one of the cigarettes behind him.

"And the lighter, man." Sanji twisted his body around to light the cherry end of the stick for the criminal, not wanting to give an extra advantage to the man by throwing the lighter behind him, as well.

There was a few minutes of silence before the blond broke the bubble, "So... you stole something."

The man grunted, "Yeah." He rested his gun next to him, on the leather seat of Sanji's old geezer's car, as he took a wisp of the stick.

Silence again.

"Why?" Sanji asked, curious why certain people chose these types of lifestyles instead of a humdrum routine, with peace as a certain guarantee.

"Why are you asking?" the criminal countered, looking irritated.

The blond clicked his tongue before he impatiently snarled, "Because I gave you a cigarette."

The criminal's mouth twisted in such a strange manner that it took awhile for Sanji to realize that the man was actually trying to smile. "You're alright, man." He tossed the remnant of his stick out the small crack of his car window. "I need the money, why else?"

Sanji sighed, "Why not look for a job instead?"

The man grunted, "The economy nowadays makes it hard for people like me, who has a criminal record, to get a job, but I tried nonetheless until... until the hunger began to kick in." He groaned as though recalling his past, "Man, you don't understand how terrible being hungry is, the worst shit in the world. I begged people for money, some food, but everyone is fucking cruel and only out for themselves. They don't care about no homeless man dying of hunger, it's just another trash for them to clean up in the morning, so I decided to take care myself by stealing."

The blond's eyes widened. "I-" he paused, taken back that a criminal was in a position that he himself was when he was a child. If he had been in the man's shoes, he knew he would've done the exact same thing because hunger made one desperate, enough to lose themselves in the process.

"I understand," Sanji told him.

"You do?" the criminal questioned, unsure.

Sanji nodded.

"So... you'll help?"

Sanji shook his head.

No matter how desperate the situation was, how hungry he was, the blond couldn't direct the man in the wrong direction. "No, I won't," he spoke, firmly, as he lit up another cigarette for himself.

The gun was pressed against his side again, "Well, you don't have a choice."

"Hear me out, you shitty bastard." Although the man was threatening his life, Sanji still wanted to help him out and let him know that there was still hope for him, another procedure that wasn't so illegal. "If you turn yourself in right now, the court will probably sentence you for a short amount of time, about a year or two, perhaps less. Once you're out, I'll give you a job at a restaurant and a place to live, which also includes meals three times a day, alright?"

A beat of silence.

The man had dropped his jaw, widely. His eyes, sunken deep into his skull, began to well up with tears. "R-Really, man? You would do that for me? A stranger?"

"Only if you-"

"Sir, please show me your driver's license and vehicle registration," a police officer tapped against his window. "There has been a robbery nearby and the suspect was seen on this route, we have to check with every driver just in case he has accomplices nearby."

The criminal, the chased man, ducked behind Sanji's chair as Sanji handed the officer his ID and license. Through the rear-view mirror, he met the man's uncertain eyes, which he silently encouraged with a nod of his head.

You know what to do...

The backdoor opened, the man stepped out, and in matter of seconds, the cops surrounded Zeff's car with pistols in their hands. The blond did not appreciate those little shitheads in uniforms pointing guns at his old man's car, but he held his tongue. They ordered Sanji to get out, as well, so he did and stretched his spine when he stepped out of the vehicle.

The criminal had already dropped his weapon and cash.

Their eyes met, and before a cop stepped forward to apprehend the man, he murmured, "Thanks." Very faintly, that not even Sanji would've heard if it wasn't for the breeze carrying the sound towards him.

Sanji smiled, "Baratie. Go to Baratie."

He didn't know whether the criminal had heard him or not, but as the cop pushed the man inside the police car, he saw a faint nod and a glimmer of gratitude in his eyes. The blond smiled, for the first time in months, he knew that he had done the right thing and that he had done his old man proud.

A familiar voice called his name, "Sanji!"

An energetic tone that could be none other than one of the D brothers, Ace.

"Ace!?"

It had been such a long time, how are you? How's Luffy? How's everyone? How's Zoro? he wanted to ask. In all honesty, he believed that everyone, including the D brothers, were avoiding him due to their loyalty to Zoro, but apparently not. Ace appeared so happy to see him, a familiar grin that relaxed every nerve in Sanji's body.

For some reason, Ace was wearing a cop uniform. "What are you doing here?" he asked.

"That's what I should be asking," the blond laughed. "Why are you a cop now? I didn't know you had a degree for that."

The freckled faced man chuckled, "My grandpa has a whole police force behind him so he doesn't really mind when I stick around because I sometimes help out." He observed Sanji and a set of worried features took over his expression, "Are you alright lately? I haven't seen you in awhile. You kind of look like a stoner."

Probably the dark bags under his eyes. "I mean, I haven't been able to sleep lately."

"Where were you going?" Ace asked, since they were standing in middle of the highway. Sanji opened his mouth then closed it shut. Should he be honest? Ace continued, "Can I go with you? I don't have a ride right now."

Sanji stammered, "I mean, I was planning to go to Kuina's because I wanted to... talk to marimo about the argument we had... and apologize and-"

"Huh? Argument? What happened with Zoro?" Ace interrupted, looking puzzled, squinting his eyes.

He doesn't know?

Sanji had expected him to know, assumed that Zoro had told everyone about the awkward kiss that ruined their whole friendship, but seeing the utterly confused Ace proved that assumption false.

"Yeah, we got into an argument. I tried looking for him, I even went to that bar but you guys weren't there." He tried not to sound so accusing, despite the fact that he felt slightly betrayed.

"Oh, sorry, man. It's because I recently found a new bar. You should swing by, it's fucking awes-"

A cop, with a smaller frame than Ace interrupted the two, "Excuse me, sir, you're Sanji Blackleg, right?" He had a serious glint in his eyes, looking at him with a deadpan expression. "I have to speak to you."

Sanji responded, "Yeah that's me."

Shit, shit, shit, what if they think I'm an accomplice?

But all the tense nerves relaxed and the atmosphere turned normal when the cop smiled at him, business-like, of course, but nonetheless still a smile. "Sorry, but my boss requires that a hostage must fill out some paperwork, it won't take long, I promise."

Whew, the blond breathed out in relief.

But at the time, irritated, because paperwork for cops always took awhile to fill. Ace helped a little, told him what some words meant and what meaning they held, but it still took too much time.

He finished by the time the sun began to fall and the traffic began to run smoothly, without further police investigations. Before long, the two males were sitting inside Sanji's vehicle with their seat belts on, driving to Kuina's place. Ace complained to him about how Luffy was beginning to grow up, drifting apart to find his own future. Of course, to Sanji, who had been an only child, this brotherly affection was a foreign concept to him.

"So, what about you, Sanji? What's up with you?" Ace asked, after finishing his complaints.

Sanji quickly glanced to his side, "What do you mean?" Yeah, yeah, he was playing dumb, of course, trying to elongate this stalling.

"I mean, you look like shit," the man paused. "Is the reason connected to Zoro?" he asked, playfully, almost anticipating for a "yes" from Sanji.

Unintentionally, the blond's face reddened; not from embarrassment but from shame at the mention of the swordsman's name. "No, I just haven't gotten any sleep lately."

Ace hummed, "Hmm, come on, babe, you can tell me."

Sanji laughed, "What the hell are you talking about, Ace?"

"It's obvious that you like Zoro!" Ace blurted, leaving a subsequent awkward silence to hang over their heads. He chuckled, "Oops."

The blond was shocked, empty of words to speak. Shocked because the raven haired man knew, probably all of them did, but more taken back by the manner in which Ace treated this situation. It made Sanji feel silly for thinking it was such a taboo deal when Ace laughed about it, accepted it, wanted him to announce about it. Being a secretive person, Sanji assumed that telling others would leave him exposed, vulnerable, but there was only a sense of relief, a feeling of comfort that followed after someone else's acceptance.

"Bastard," Sanji grunted.

"Ah, ha! I knew it!" Ace jolted, "I knew you guys had a thing, or have a thing."

"Well..."

Should he spill it? He should spill it. When? Now? It was about damn time.

"He doesn't like me back, so rather than us having a thing, it's me having a thing," he gritted his teeth.

A pause of silence. "How are you so sure?"

Well... he was sure because Zoro had rejected his kiss, had left him a note and left him cold on his bed. Sanji saw those disgusted eyes directed toward him, for that kiss, for that emotion, for being a man. Sanji briefly summarized the situation between him and Zoro, how that kiss had ruined their whole friendship, and Ace's face dropped with sympathy.

"Oh," Ace responded. To lighten up the atmosphere, he changed the subject, "So, how do you know if Zoro is at Kuina's?"

"I'm swinging blind here, I don't know whether that idiot is at his girlfriend's house or not."

There was the sound of shuffling next to him, Ace was searching through his bag. "I'll just call him."

Sanji gulped.

Ring, ring, ring. Ring, ring, ring.

Click.

"Hey, man," Ace greeted.

Then Sanji heard the man's voice, low but distinct to his ears, familiar but foreign, it excited him to the core and made him feel like shit all over again.

Zoro.

"Where are you?" Sanji listened closely to hear that voice once more. "Good, I'm heading over there right now with-" Ace paused, glanced at the blond to ask for permission, but Sanji shook his head ferociously, silently begging Ace to stay quiet about him. "-myself," he finished.

There was a response from the other line, probably something funny or offensive because Ace threw his head back to laugh. A streak of envy ran through the cook, because he and Zoro once shared a laugh like that, too."

"Well, Sanji, he's at Kuina's house, you were right," Ace told him after ending the call. "I'm curious, what are you going to tell him once we get there?" he asked.

This was something the D brothers were good at: asking the right questions that stumped others flat.

The question was incredibly simple, like "tell me about yourself" or "how was your childhood," something that journalists love to use to get people talking because the answer, unlike the question, had to be complex. Sanji had imagined that the conversation with Zoro would run smoothly, a couple of sorry's here and there before requesting for the friendship again, tell him that he wasn't so in love with him anymore, that it was had all been a mistake, so can they just fucking return to the way it was, before things got so screwed up? But thinking upon it, really pondering over it, his approach seemed naive.

Why am I doing this?

"Should I go back, Ace?" he asked, wondering whether this raven haired man had all the answers laid out for him.

Ace sighed, "It's your choice, Sanji. If I start making it for you, it won't be your life anymore. Whatever you decide, to go or not, I'll back you up on it."

The blond bit his lips. "I'm going," he said, because really, how worse could it be if Zoro reject him the way he did before?

"Good, now let's turn on the radio."

Sanji agreed, except that he hadn't expected a screamo genre with angry yells blasting his ears. He winced when he heard the raven haired man shouting along with whatever the vocalist was saying; it distracted him from the road so much that he had almost missed the shadow that jumped in front of the light, a shadow with piercing eyes that resembled a hawk.

"Shit!"

He curved his car and hit the breaks, stopped his car abruptly by swinging the wheel to one side. Both passengers held on for their dear lives as the tires screeched alongside the guitar strokes from the radio. They panted heavily when the car spun twice but without a scratch, that and the fact that Sanji had not ran over anyone.

Sanji turned the radio off and jumped out of the car, wondered whether the person was okay.

"Are you alright?" he asked, a bit surprised to find a man with intimidating set of eyes and a blade attached to his back, the handle of it looking like a huge cross, matching his gold necklace.

"It's fine," the man responded, with heavy tone of voice.

After Ace got out of the car, he was suddenly all up on the man, his face directly in front of the other's, intensely staring at his hawk-like eyes. "Have I seen you before?"

"Where are your manners boy?" the man snapped as he stepped back, away from the raven haired man. "I have businesses to attend to, so I apologize for the disturbance I caused."

"Ah, it's alright," Sanji said, taken back by the politeness of the swordsman (which made him wonder whether he was a magnet for those who carry swords).

The strange man walked out of sight, passing them and heading to where they had come from.

"I swear I saw him somewhere..."

This whole accident reminded him of his first meeting with Zoro, how it had all been a simple coincidence, how everything had played its part and led him to that very moment on the street. If Nami had not cancelled on him, he would not have met Zoro. If he decided to stay home instead of heading to Baratie, he would not have met Zoro. Some people would call it fate, but he called it bullshit. The irrationality of the world had made it a gamble, a chance, for Sanji to meet Zoro, who changed his life.

"Oh my fucking god," Ace shouted when they were back inside the vehicle, driving down the road. "SHIT! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!" Strings of curses slurred from the man's tongue, over and over until he took his phone out and began to dial the numbers in.

"What's happening? Ace, what the hell!"

"Sanji, do a one-eighty, right now, I remember the man!"

Sanji hit the brakes again, harshly, to spin the car around. "What's happening?" he asked, with a hint of irritation, from being left in the dark.

The raven haired man growled at his phone, "Zoro, pick your goddamn phone up." He angrily slammed the phone down before he explained to Sanji, "That man is the one Zoro's looking for, Kuina, too! The greatest swordsman in the goddamn world, Dracule Mihawk. Fuck, I'm so fucking stupid, I didn't recognize him right away."

He began to dial another number ferociously, punching the keys in with his index finger.

Greatest swordsman? Zoro's dream?

Determined, Sanji stepped on the pedal and drove into the night with a tumultuous screech from his tires.

AN: Revised~

Huh, I guess I really like the theme of almost running people over with cars.

I laughed a little at the thought of Ace listening to screamo music, but it would be pretty hot if he had long hair and wore black all the time.

Anyways, the criminal... Yes, yes, he was kind of irrelevant, but I wanted Gin (Yes, it is Gin) to be in the fic and interact with Sanji. And I thought it was kind of funny how Sanji was completely aloof to the situation even when though all the guns were pointed at him.

Also, the insomnia. I do think with a past like Sanji's that some type of stir would occur inside the brain, perhaps a split personality, but for Sanji, it's just sleep troubles (a really chronic case).

The next chapter will be covering Zoro's point of view after the kiss, why he quit the organization and what really happened with the bar, the avoiding of Sanji and all that is relevant to the text. Ew, sorry I sound like an English teacher.

Anyways, thank you again for the read!