Chapter Seven: Tamera's Issues

Tamera's Apartment 11:30AM

Tamera's was in a ball beside her toilet. She was shaking as she sobbed. She didn't know what had put her on this low. She knew she had a really good life and she should be happy. Why was she so determined to be miserable? She was too busy sobbing and hating herself to hear the knock on the door. She was alarmed when Teddy barged in the bathroom and accessed the situation.

"Get the FUCK out!" She was alarmed by his presence in her house, but then quickly remembered he had a spare key. She'd never let Ted see her at her lowest. He'd never really seen her cry like this. She covered her face so that he couldn't stare. Teddy had known about her "issues" be he'd never seen her at her "ugliest", her eyelids were puffy and her eyes stained red. Ted ignored her screams for him to leave, flushed her vomit down the toilet, but the seat down and sat in front of her on the floor. He grabbed some toilet paper, removed her hands from her face, and wiped her tears away. Tam watched her friend as he carefully wiped her tears. His jaw was clenched he was frustrated that he didn't know how to make it right. "I don't want you to see me like this," she croaked. She closed her eyes and more tears started to roll. Ted tried to catch them as they fell.

"If you don't want me to see you crying, and then stop crying, but to don't ask me to leave because I'm not going anywhere," Ted whispered with hurt in his voice.

"Teddy …" she was about to protest and try to force him to leave again, if not her apartment, the least he could do was leave the bathroom so that could suffer her shame in privacy.

"No Tam, what kind of friend would I be if I just left you here like this. So if you are going to sit here I will sit with you." After a few more tears Tam pulled herself together. She forced herself to stop because she couldn't handle Teddy giving her that look of hurt, confusion, and frustration. She crawled over to Teddy and wrapped her arms around him and he pulled her into his lap. She rested her head on his shoulder. "Thank you Teddy … for being here," she murmured, he rubbed her back and continued to soothe her.

"Anytime short stack, are you ready to vacate the bathroom? It is a nice large clean bathroom, but I'd much rather sit on a couch wouldn't you?" Ted chuckled and Tamera made an attempt to smile and shook her head.

"Yeah," she said dryly. Teddy promptly lifted her as he rose from the floor, he carried her much like a baby out of the bathroom and into the living room. He sat her down on the couch and went to retrieve the lunch he'd gotten for her from the kitchen. He began to place the food in front of her much like a parent would do for their child.

"Uh … I don't want to eat anything Teddy, I'm really not hungry," she said faintly. She didn't bother to look at Ted because she knew he was about to snap at her. She had no right to protest after years of being "normal" she was slipping back into habits that she'd thought she'd conquered.

"You will eat this food and you will enjoy every bite." He didn't argue and his tone wasn't hard. He voice was too full of concern and hurt to come off this way.

"Okay," he handed her half of the sandwich and she began to force it down.

After a few moments of watching her eat, Teddy looked away from her, "Why Tamera?" He kept his tone low he didn't want to argue with her when she was already so fragile, but he was so damned angry at her for worrying him this way. "Do you need me to contact Dr. Grice? I know that's who you went to last time all of this went down."

"I don't think it's like it was last time. If it happens again contact her no matter what I say." Tam instructed. This is really good." Tamera said as she switched subject to her food.

"It should be, it's your favorite sandwich from Panera and don't forget your soup." He ordered he was starting to feel more relaxed, like the emergency was over. He leaned back and picked at his phone.

"Is it potato?" She said with the innocence of a little child, he smirked at her and nodded at her. For a moment his father's words went through his head, I have nothing else to compare it to, his father had to be joking. He was sure his dad had seen close friendships before. "You know me so well Teddy." She grabbed the container that held her soup and her spoon and began to devour it. He was surprised that she'd been so quick to start eating again. When she was in high school and she went through this she never ate around him. She would always say things like she just ate.

"I know you better than you know yourself." He insisted and she just chuckled. He hopped up from the couch and snatched his car keys from the coffee table. "Keep eating and don't move."

"I need to move to eat Teddy," she giggled and Ted smiled to himself. This was more like his Tam.

"Keep eating and stay seated," he rephrased and then he left the apartment. Tamera did as he asked and finished her food and didn't once feel the urge to upchuck. Little did Ted know Tam had already made an appointment with Dr. Grice. Tamera hadn't suffered from bulimic tendencies since she was in high school. She had no idea what had triggered it today. She was just so mad at herself and she felt, out of place, awkward, and huge. She was also pissed that she'd ruined Ted's day. It was the day before his birthday and she had planned to cook him dinner. She hopped up and pulled the chicken from the fridge, she also grabbed an egg, flour, and other ingredients to make she mom's friend chicken. The trick was to add Texas Pete hot sauce in the egg and create a mix to the dip the chicken in so more flour sticks the chicken and it comes out extra crispy. She quickly created her base. After a few minutes Ted came back with his initial gift in tow for her.

"What the hell is that?" Tam knew that garment bag all too well. I was one of mom's garment bags.

"I asked Miss Black for a favor. She said she'd made this with you in mind." He waved the bag around and danced a bit and it made Tam laughed and snort.

"Is it from her plus size collection?" Tamera murmured. Ted laid the bag across her magenta chair and stalked toward her and pulled at the back of her pants so he could see her size tag. "TED, STOP WHAT THE HELL DUDE!"

"What plus size woman do you know wears a size 7?" Tam didn't say anything she just pouted. "And the only reason your pants are this big is because you've got a big ass … and FYI guys like that!" He popped her hard on the behind and she yelped and then giggled.

"So what contraption did my mother send?" Tamera placed the oil on the eye to heat.

"I'm glad you asked." Ted motioned for her to come closer. He revealed to content of the garment bag. Tam's eyes bugged out of her head. The dress was nothing like she'd pick for herself. It was one of these skin tight dresses her mom liked. Everything Tamera was insecure about would be seen she groaned inwardly. "I see your face and I would like to remind you that you gave me permission to pick your outfit. I want to prove to you that men think you are sexy."

"It's a little short," Tam said as she clenched the front of her shirt.

"Yeah … I know." Ted smirked and Tamera shoved him before returning to the kitchen. Ted followed her and watched as she cooked. "I told you didn't have to do all of this."

"I wanted to cook for you Ted, its bad enough I ruined today for you. The least I could do is cook you dinner." He nodded as he debated if it was smart to ask the question he wanted to ask.

"So what, uh, why did that happen?" He murmured she had her back to him she hunched her shoulders as she started placing the chicken in the grease. She only had chicken breasts, Teddy's favorite.

"I feel ugly Ted, I feel … weird and awkward."

"You are none of those things," he stated firmly. "You may be a little ditzy because you believe those things." He chuckled even though he didn't find her distorted self image funny.

"You're my friend you have to say those things Ted!"

"No, I don't! Because you're my friend I would give you the truth. I always tell you the truth." He thought back to his sixteenth birthday that was the one then he'd ever lied to her about and that's because the conversation would bring up more questions than it was worth. Tam chuckled but said nothing, she didn't believe him. "You should really trust me more Tam."

"I do most of the time," she said honestly. "I trust you more than I trust anyone else."

"I trust you completely," he said without thinking. "That's why I discuss everything with you."

"Aww … Teddy that's so sweet," she teased. She pulled the already cooked macaroni and cheese and put it in the oven to heat.

"I didn't say it to be sweet, I said because it's the truth," he stated bluntly. "You don't lie to me, you don't look at me like all the other girls do, and you … I don't know Tam, you're just you. That's why it pisses me off when you say negative stuff about yourself because to me you're pretty great."

"Ted, that's the greatest thing you've ever said to me." She looked down at her fingers and she could feel the heat flushing her cheeks.

"I know I'm amazing!" Ted sighed and brushed the invisible dirt off his shoulder.

"You're something alright!" Tam flicked her fingers and made flour sprinkle his face. Ted chuckled but he didn't bother to retaliate. He was just happy she was acting like her normal self and that he was going to get to eat.