Chapter 21
'Amazing Race – Crash & Burn'
'Breakfast of Champions''
'The Pajama Game'
'Graded'
Boone plays chef and prepares breakfast for everyone at the cabin. It is an impressive spread on the long Endor mahogany wood table just outside the kitchen area. Fern and Magnus are the first ones downstairs. Fern takes in the aroma of breakfast cooking. She stands at the counter in her pastel green flannel pajamas with cheerful cartoon-like tauntauns on them and pours herself some hot cocoa.
"Wow…what's the occasion, Boone?"
"I just wanted to show my gratitude to the gang for an amazing day yesterday…"
Magnus pulls out a chair.
"We got thrown out of a restaurant. That's not amazing…it's a disgrace."
"Well you didn't let me finish.. We had a terrific practice run on the slopes last night and I wanted to make sure everyone had a nourishing breakfast for the race today. We are going to run a clean race today. There will be not fighting and no one will get hurt."
"Now that will be amazing."
Son'ya shuffles downstairs in a zombie-like state. She yawns. Her streaked hair is not yet combed and a clip holds a tuft of her hair at the top of her head. She is wearing pink thermal crewneck and pink pajama bottoms with black and white cartoon drawings of voorpaks. She has pink Sand Lug boots on her feet. Boone has a big smile on his face. He slides a plate across the table to her.
"Good morning, sunshine. I prepared a special breakfast for you. Fresh fruit, toast, tofu omelet with spinach, and pera juice."
"Thanks, Boo." She looks around to see what everyone else has on their plate. Dantius walks in. He has already showered and combed his hair. His clothes are well put together.
Son'ya looks across the table at him.
"Where are you going? Confession?"
"No. I always dress like this…why?"
"Nothing… The rest of us are still in our pajamas. You just look like a geek."
Boone pretends to poke her with the cooking fork.
"Back…back, you evil wench. Eat your breakfast, it'll make you feel better, and let everyone eat their breakfast in peace."
Magnus butters his toast.
"Soni, do you plan to say dumb things or is it just a side effect of falling out of bed in the morning?"
Son'ya is immediately defensive.
"I didn't do anything."
Boone waves the fork at her.
"Stop talking and eat your breakfast. Final warning."
Son'ya lifts the glass to her lips and sips her fruit juice.
The rest of the crew arrives. Roman playfully pretends to stalk Sigrid as they head downstairs. She arrives at the table and turns, Roman quickly stops. She wears her hair in a high ponytail. A black satin sleep mask is pushed up on her forehead. She is also a fan of whimsical sleepwear donning a set of powder blue thermal pajamas with drawings of cherubic Ewoks on skis. She wears blue Sand Lug slippers with thick socks. Sigrid sits cross-legged in her chair. Boone serves her breakfast.
"Your breakfast, fair maiden."
"Thank you, Boone. It looks fabulous. I know it takes wonderful."
"It won't disappoint." He serves Roman. "Ro, enjoy."
"Thanks, man. How did you know I like sausage waffles with syrup? You're a genius, man."
Son'ya looks at the other plates on the table.
"How come they get waffles and stuff?"
"You don't eat it. Aren't you a vegan?"
"Yes, but…"
"Bu-bu-bu…what?"
"Nothing... I just have the most boring breakfast of everyone here."
"That's the card you dealt, my wacky little ravel rouser."
"It's not fair."
"What do you want me to do?"
"Make my food is a cool shape like everyone else's."
"You've got to be 'effing' kidding me."
Son'ya gives Boone a sad look. She takes her plate.
"Give me that." He mutters to himself as he reassembles her breakfast on the kitchen counter. He returns the food to the plate then presents it to her. "Happy?"
Son'ya smiles like a 5-year old on Befana Eve.
:"Oh, Boone, it's beautiful." The food on her plate has been arranged to resemble a smiling Ewok.
"Great. Bon Appétit."
Magnus looks up from his plate to make an announcement.
"I just heard this morning that our grades are coming out soon. They'll be online."
Fern cuts into her waffle.
"I already know what I'm getting. My professors don't believe in keeping us in suspense."
Son'ya looks surprised.
"You do?"
"Of course I know what I'm getting, and I'm very happy."
Magnus shrugs. "In any event, the grades will be ready this week for you and your parents to see."
Roman stuffs his mouth with a waffle soaked in syrup.
"My parents will be happy that I'm still in school."
Magnus snaps back calmly.
"Yeah, I just remembered, you're proud of your low expectations, aren't you? You have no problem taking that walk of shame to the dean's office."
"Hey, I put forth an effort to do well. I've got my tutor here." He glances over at Boone who is finally serving himself breakfast. Roman continues. "My parents don't want me back home too soon; if I can keep my GPA to where I don't get kicked out of school, they're happy."
Fern points to Dantius.
"Dani is keeping quiet. He knows he's going to ace the semester."
Son'ya nods in agreement
"He's one of the brightest students in out philosophy class. The professor is always calling on him, pushing him to do better. You don't have a thing to worry about, Dani."
Dantius tries to be modest.
"I think I did alright." He smiles then continues eating.
Magnus taps his glass a few times to get everyone's attention.
"Okay, 'ladies' gobble down all the carbs you can, and don't forget to take your gear. We need to be ready to kick some Grav-ball team ass today. Let's show those cretins that we're a force to be reckoned with."
Boone digs into his plate of food.
"Right on!"
Everyone starts banging their utensils on the table and begin to chant
"O-le…Ole, Ole,Ole...Ole-Ole...O-le-"
Magnus stares at Boone's plate.
"Boone, what the hell is that?"
"Breakfast?"
"Your waffles are oozing, dude."
"Oh, it's a new creation of mine called the 'Boone Breakfast.'"
Fern stares at the stacked waffle creation.
"Why is it leaking?"
"Oh, that's the syrup and the creamed chipped dried nerf, Tatooine hash browns, poached egg, Eopie back bacon, topped with fresh berries, butter and more syrup."
Son'ya grimaces.
"I think I'm going to throw up."
Magnus looks at the plate then again at Boone.
"And the berries are to symbolize…what?"
"Freshness. It's wholesome food!"
"I'm glad it's going in your stomach and not mine."
Sigrid indicates with her fork.
"What are those little crunchy things on the egg?"
"Granola clusters"
"I thought so."
Boone begins to wax poetic about his 'creation.'
"It's like an adventure on your tongue."
Fern chuckles as she eats her yogurt.
"More like 'whiplash on your tongue,"
"Don't knock it till you've tried it."
Magnus stares at the plate again.
"If I wanted crunchy eggs, I would eat them with the shell."
"It's a taste sensation. Hey, Dano, try some."
"I'm good, thanks."
"You guys are so judgmental."
"I don't want my waffles to ooze."
Roman, I bet someone would buy it."
"Totally."
"Better think of a catchier name than the 'Boone Breakfast.'"
"Yeah, I know. How about calling it the 'The McWaffle?' No one is ever going to think of a concoction anywhere near as gross as that. Not in a gazillion light years."
"I think I'll stick to the "Boone Breakfast."
Son'ya quips.
"'Stick' is the right word for it…sticks to your arteries."
Sigrid glances over at Dantius.
"Dano, are you going to be able to see with that eye?"
"Oh, I'm fine."
Dantius is flattered that the object of his affection is concerned for him. He is more motivated than ever to participate in this race. He goes upstairs to change into his new ski outfit as soon as breakfast is over.
The morning is filled with great anticipation. The various college groups arrive on the mountain. Students have selected the group that they wish to compete against. Son'ya organizes her team based of the best chance in each heat. She inspects the lineup then raises her arms like a cheerleader. She is beaming like a proud parent but is as controlling as a diminutive dictator
"Oh, you all look great!"
Boone mocks her.
"Aww shucks, ma."
She ignores him. As she makes her way down the line, her enthusiastic smile drops to a frown. She slaps Roman on the forehead. He stumbles back a few steps.
"Oww! Hey! What'd ya do that for?"
"Where's your 'effing' ski bib?"
"You were serious about that?"
"I made them especially for this purpose, you idiot! Put it on!"
"Okay, okay! You don't have to go mental on me. Calm down, tiny madwoman!"
A few members from the Grav-ball team, including Chip Neider and Doug Cooha'ki, are watching Son'ya's team from a distance. They enjoy a huge laugh but Chip remains silent.
Stig Childsen sneers.
"This is going to be too easy. What a joke!"
Another teammate laughs in agreement as he leans on his ski poles.
"Too bad we have to take out the whole team. The chicks are smokin' hot."
Stig responds coldly as he puts on his helmet.
"That's what's referred to as collateral damage, men." Stig stabs the snowy ground beneath him with his ski pole.
Doug squirms angrily in his power chair and pounds his gloved fist into the palm of his left hand.
Do whatever it takes to wipe them out…especially those two. He points. "Crash and burn, men. Crash and burn."
A popular Holonet News announcer makes a special appearance at the event. He sits a broadcast booth at the starting point. The middle-aged silver haired newsman speaks into a megaphone as the students make their way to the holding area near the starting gate.
"Good morning, student contestants and spectators! Welcome to the tenth annual North Ridge Challenge! It's a beautiful day on Mount Ison; conditions are perfect with 20 centimeters of fresh powder. We're ready for another exciting race. It's the perfect opportunity to get to know your fellow classmates and students from other universities across the Galaxy. This is your host, T.J. Cameron Baxter reminding you, 'It's about the sportsmanship, not the win, kids'."
Doug's movements are hindered by his neck brace and the snug therapy vest under his down parka as his broken ribs heal. He repeats his ominous mantra under his breath.
"Crash and burn, freaks."