Brian didn't want to be having this conversation. He had a lot on his mind. A potential promotion opportunity had suddenly become a last chance to save his job. Thank you so much George VP of sales and fucking Jackson. JACKSON, really? He was an unimaginative tool. And Mr. York, one of the two name partners of K&Y, had come down to Brian's office to demand that Brian either send Justin back to the Art Department or find some other way to keep Ryan happy. That was just the work shitstorm. Then there had been the fallout from Mikey's birthday party. Brian had been outed to his family as having a boyfriend and a monogamous relationship at that and worse still that he and Justin had gone on several dates before he'd 'given it up.' The LAST thing he wanted to do was to admit to further weakness. But he had to say something. He'd decided on the subway platform that he wanted to keep Justin 'around' and that he'd be willing to make a few changes to do it. But what could he say? What would be enough but not too much?

While Brian had been lost in his own head, Justin had been watching Brian, waiting somewhat impatiently. Every second that passed seemed to confirm his worst fears. Brian had wanted that cop. That much was clear. And Brian had spent the better part of a decade fucking his way through Pittsburgh's gay community. But … Brian hadn't been tricking since he met Justin, and whatever his dick might have urged Brian to do, he had ended up shoving the cop away roughly. Justin had the appearance ticket in his hand to prove it. Justin had another shockingly brave moment, like the one where he had started seducing Brian in his office (in broad daylight) … or when he had introduced himself to Mikey as Brian's boyfriend … or when he had told Mikey in no uncertain terms that he didn't need to fuck his way to the top. Just as Brian opened his mouth to speak, Justin covered it with his right hand. He swallowed hard and said, "Don't."

Brian's eyes widened.

Justin had thought he knew the kind of man (a player) Brian was when he'd first glimpsed him on the train and then when they'd first spoken at his art show. But Brian wasn't THAT. Or not JUST that. He was so much more. So much more than anyone in Pittsburgh seemed to know. Lindsay and Mel believed he didn't know how to show love and caring, as a father should. But Justin knew better. Brian had slowed their whatever down the moment he'd touched Justin's scar. He'd held Justin all night and gotten him to do what no one else could – not Daphne, not his mother, not therapists: talk about the bashing. He'd even distracted Justin on the train when he'd started having a panic attack (although Justin knew that he'd taken it much farther than necessary, perhaps in retaliation for some of the things Justin had said over the weekend). Mikey, Emmett, and Ted seemed to think that Brian was little more than a walking hard-on. But that, too, was inaccurate. Brian wanted more than a reputation as a predator. He wanted to connect. And he had chosen Justin. Only Justin.

Justin smiled. "I know I'm much more than a convenient fuck to you. I shouldn't have let what Mikey said make me question that." He stood on his tiptoes and kissed Brian gently on the lips. Then he walked past Brian and into Brian's building (with a little help from the friendly doorman).

A moment later he popped his head back out – startling the aforementioned doorman – and called out, "You coming?"

Justin had shocked Brian into paralysis. But at that, he shook his head and started moving. "Yeah."

Brian had bumped Justin's shoulder a couple of times while they walked through the lobby, and he'd stood very close to Justin during the elevator ride. Justin smiled a million-watt smile as they walked into the loft. This must be Brian's way of showing his happiness at Justin's believing in him. He was going to frame his appearance ticket. Maybe he could use that and the tunnel fuck as inspiration for a new piece.

Something had shifted for Justin in the last four days. Maybe it was just that he and Brian had finally had sex (and A LOT of it). Maybe it was the subway near orgasm and their fucking on the platform. Maybe it was realizing JUST how special he was to Brian. Or maybe it was recognizing that he had fallen madly in love with Brian. He couldn't say for sure. But suddenly, he was MUCH less shy. So he did something Daphne had been suggesting for two weeks: Justin started disrobing. Brian's eyes darkened with lust the second Justin began showing skin and even licked his lips when Justin's just hardening cock came into view. Justin smiled, a little shyly, and blushed. He was still so amazed that he could produce such WANT in Brian. Then he moved to disencumber Brian of HIS clothes. Justin's hand on his jeans, unbuttoning them, woke Brian up. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply. Then he burst out, "I can't."

"What?" Justin tried, and failed, to keep the hurt out of his voice. He should have been used to Brian's mixed messages. Brian had often kept Justin at bay even with tented jeans. But Justin had hoped those days were past, now that they'd actually started doing 'the deed.'

Brian backed up and ran his fingers through his hair. "Some things are going on at work." And they were. But if he were in the habit of admitting things, even to himself, he would have added that the tunnel fuck and Justin's response to his own question might be a factor. Justin was causing Brian to be someone he'd never thought he'd want to be, someone he'd never thought he could be. And it was freaking him the fuck out. A little space wouldn't be bad. He thought.

Justin slipped his underwear and jeans back on, but left his shirt off. Justin frowned. Then he had an idea. It had worked in the office. It could work here. He purred, "You look tense. Why don't I rub your shoulders while you tell me about it?"

Brian shrugged. That seemed harmless enough. He slid his shirt off and sat down on the couch. Justin climbed behind Brian and pushed him forward on the seat. He drew his hands lightly over the back of Brian's neck and shoulders so gently it gave Brian a chill and then started kneading.

Brian sighed contentedly. Then he said, "I need to sign a client. And I need to do it right the fuck now." He couldn't keep the urgency out of his voice.

Justin's eyes widened. "Why?" Brian's tone scared him. Justin knew how hard it was succeeding in New York, especially in a place like Brian's advertising firm. Every day was potentially make or break. It was like Heidi Klum said on Project Runway. "One day you're in. The next day you're out."

Brian sighed. But not in contentment. He couldn't tell Justin that he was a step away from being fired. Advertising was the one thing left he did well. He couldn't let anyone, least of all Justin, see him falter. So he faked a calm he did not feel and smirked. "I'm trying to beat out Jackson for a promotion."

Justin scoffed, "Jackson? He's not even in your league. All he ever does is upgrade."

Yup. Brian was as disgusted as Justin sounded. Jackson would simply take a campaign the client loved and change the colors or the actors or add some tiny new detail. He hadn't created a single campaign from scratch, out of his own head, in the three years Brian had been at K&Y. "One of the partners must like him. He's my competition."

Justin laughed and relaxed. "Beating him should be easy."

Brian closed his eyes tight. Then he opened them and 'explained' in as light a voice as he could manage, "It's just the timeframe. I need this done ASAP. But I haven't even made a shortlist of companies I could approach yet."

"You just need one really good idea. Save yourself the time of coming up with several pitches." As Justin pondered, he placed his elbow up against Brian's back, right beside his spine, and pressed, hard.

Brian moaned. Loudly. Justin smiled. A million-watt smile. Suddenly Justin dropped his hands (Brian groaned in complaint) and shouted, "I GOT IT! The blind item." Justin jumped off the couch and unzipped the front of his suitcase, pulling out his phone. Then he proceeded to call Daphne. Brian was perplexed to say the least, but he was curious.

Justin was beyond enthusiastic. He could barely make his fingers work even though he only had to press two buttons, and, when Daphne answered, he asked somewhat breathlessly and without so much as a hello, "Daph, what was the blind item about the vodka guy?"

Justin walked over to Brian's computer and wiggled then mouse to activate the screen. Then he held the phone between his head and neck and started typing. His eyes lit up a minute later, and he whispered conspiratorially, "Thanks! You're MADE of awesome." Then he called Brian over. "Come look." His eyes were twinkling, and he was smiling shyly.

Brian walked over and stood behind Justin. Justin had pulled up a gossip website. Brian frowned. What good intel could he get from a gossip site?

Justin explained, "A blind item is when they have gossip about someone but can't say the person's name or they don't know it. Daph and I read these all the time and try to guess. We're usually pretty good … we have a 9 to 1 success ratio."

Brian chuckled. Well, you couldn't argue with numbers like that.

Justin moved the mouse to the item in question and started reading. "Which nouveau vodka seller who has made a career out of being a ladies man is about to be pushed out of the closet?"

A closet case. So many parts of this idea were sketchy. Brian asked, "So you think I could butch this guy up before he's outed, maybe prevent him from being outed?"

"Not exactly. See butching him up got him this far, but clearly it's no longer working. Maybe you need to get him to embrace metrosexuality."

"Huhn. Maybe a 'what kind of man are you?' campaign where we play on the expectation that men are strong, independent, and fearless."

Justin bounced a little and giggled. "Exactly! Are you man enough to wear eyeliner if it makes you look hot? Or pink? Or to drink a cosmopolitan?"

Brian laughed. "Real men take it up the ass."

Justin wrinkled his nose cutely. "That may be a step too far. But … you are the perfect man to pitch this!"

"Because I'm gay?"

Justin shook his head. "You're a straight-acting gay man. The ULTIMATE straight-acting gay man."

"How do we even know who it is?"

"They gave enough clues. A NOUVEAU vodka seller. So fashionable or actually new. Made a career out of being a ladies man." Justin waggled his eyebrows.

Brian's eyes widened. "Flash!"

Justin nodded excitedly. Thankfully, he and Daphne had researched this question already. Otherwise he wouldn't have had a clue. He rarely drank. He stood up and was about to walk back over to the couch when Brian stopped him, grabbing his wrist lightly. Justin turned around.

"This could be good. It's high-end vodka, and the company DOES have style. No way anyone at K&Y would already have approached him. They tend to pursue companies that are almost institutions they've been around so long. And they tend to favor more conservative ones." Brian grinned. He looked Justin up and down, causing Justin to experience a pleasurable head-to-toe flush, and then unbuttoned Justin's jeans. He drawled, "I think this calls for a celebratory blow job." Brian licked his lips in anticipation. Justin shivered. He pushed his jeans and underwear down and stepped out of them. Then he was in Brian's arms. Brian had shoved the keyboard over and lifted Justin only to then set him on the desk, right at the edge. Then Brian pushed the chair away and kneeled.

Justin breathed, "Oh God." Just seeing Brian like this, on his knees in front of Justin, preparing to suck him off caused his dick to harden to a painful extent. Then Brian slid his hands around Justin's waist (so tenderly Justin felt faint) and started deepthroating his dick. Justin placed his hands behind him on the desk to keep himself from falling and watched Brian with now half-lidded eyes. When he was moaning and panting and biting his lip to keep from cumming, he felt this impossible ache in his chest. He risked lifting a hand and sliding it into Brian's hair. He had to touch Brian. Even with product, Brian's hair was so soft. Then he let it fall to Brian's face. He caressed Brian's cheek. Brian looked up at Justin then, causing Justin to stop breathing, causing his heart to stop beating. Brian was so beautiful. Then Brian got back on track, sucking and swallowing with even greater vigor. Justin closed his eyes and threw back his head, setting free a tear that had appeared the moment Brian's eyes made contact with Justin's. Justin moaned, loudly, "Oh Brian … Brian." The whole experience, Brian making his body feel like this, Brian wanting Justin here with him, was causing Justin to lose cohesion. The thought terrified him. And made him wonder if he had ever truly been alive until now.