sorry if this add comes out in really small writing, it seems to have gone a bit weird in the doc manager o_O

54 Dannys POV

"do you think he's woken up yet?" I asked, pushing the food on my play around, not actually eating it. "he might have, I dunno. I don't know how long they've knocked him out for." Harry shrugged, squeezing Dougies shoulders as he sniffed slightly. "I hope Tom hasn't woken up yet. He needs rest and he doesn't get it when he's panicked and f*cking tied to a bed." I grumbled the last bit, wincing when I thought about it. My poor baby Tom was laying in a bed, unable to even scratch his own nose, let alone anything else, probably scared and alone, crying. He needed someone with him, telling him that we loved him, and everything was going to be okay.

"they'll let him go soon Danny, when he calms down a little. Can you blame him for being panicky?" Harry reasoned, and I couldn't really blame him. "no, I don't know whats going on in his head, all I know is that I'll do anything to get rid of those bad thoughts." I sighed, letting myself be brought into the couples arms, needing some more comfort when thinking about how much pain my Tom was going through.

Days past by slowly, because even though we were at the hospital, no real progress was made. Most of visiting hours was spent waiting for Tom to wake up, because he apparently spent his awake time panicking, and sometimes screaming to be let go of. We tried talking to the doctors, about taking Tom out of the restraints, because that could calm him down a lot, and they refused. "we don't think it will help, only hinder. Tom likes to pick his scabs off and refuses to eat, and tries to escape, we think its best we keep him in the restraints until he at least stops trying to get out all the time." The main doctor, doctor Gubler, explained, breaking my heart.

"please, he'll stop trying to escape when you show him that your not going to hurt him! And he'll eat again, Tom can never eat when he's scared, and he is obviously scared now! Please, let him go for some part of the day, at the least, he'll improve, I know he will." I pleaded, needing to get him out of here soon, the pain of not having Tom at home had almost eaten away my soul, he needed to be home now. He belonged at home, not in hospital, restrained to a bed and sent to sleep every time he panicked.

54 Toms POV

I had a pleasant surprise when I woke up, finding I was on my own, and unrestrained. My head was pounding, and my arms and legs ached, but at least I was awake and could move. The first thing I did was sit up, and look around, trying to gauge what time it was and such things. It was night-time, and next to me was the portable DVD player, set up to play a Friends DVD. There was a piece of paper on top of it, and I picked it up, recognising Dannys messy hand writing.

'Tom, when you wake up, please don't try and run off, please! We're trying to prove to the doctors that you won't run away again, and won't panic much. Watch the Friends DVD, and please try to keep calm, and let the nurses do whatever they need to do. We'll be back in the morning, please prove us right. Danny xxxx' it read, and I sighed. I was grateful to him that he had gotten me released a little, but I didn't understand why he did it. Wasn't it easier to have me restrained and sedated, because then he didn't have to turn up because I wasn't going to notice?

I stopped thinking and took a deep breath, not wanting to think about it and end up crying, feeling that need to cut my arms to shreds. Instead, I turned on the DVD, letting myself get absorbed in it, not noticing a few nurses walking in and out, until the most familiar one turned up.

"well, well, well look who's finally back into the world of the awake!" she joked, dragging a trolley with food on it behind her. I rolled my eyes, not wanting to have the mick taken out of me. "its good to see you awake and looking a bit better, theres actual colour in your cheeks now, before you looked dead!" she smiled, checking a few monitors, making sure I hadn't touched them again. "are you gunna reply to me at some point, or are you going to ignore me some more?" she asked, giving me a half stern look. "well ask me a question then." I snapped, not liking her jokes at me, and her attempt to be friendly, it was lie, and being lied to was something I was trying to avoid.

"well someones grumpy! So, we have chicken and rice, or toad in the hole, which one do you want to eat?" she pointed to the dreaded food tray. "neither, not hungry again." I lied, not wanting to eat it. I wasn't worthy of good food, I was too messed up and annoying to have it. "yes you are, don't lie to me. I'm not fighting you every time it comes to meal time. Choose which one your going to eat, and this time, please eat it and not just stare at it." The nurse glared, I looked away, scared she would read my mind again. "I'm not hungry, leave me alone." I growled, ducking under my blanket, not letting her pull it off me. "not until you eat something. Your very ill and you need food or something bad will happen." She warned, it did nothing. Bad things happening to me was fine by me, I didn't even care.

"right, I'm going and giving everyone else their food, then coming back here. Your eating then, even if the food has gone cold!" she stormed out, and an idea struck me. Cold food...cold hospital food, which was usually disgusting anyway, cold disgusting hospital food, I could eat that. Seeing as I was turning cold as I built walls up around my heart, protecting it from hurt. I was disgusting, so I deserved disgusting food, so I could eat the hospital food! I smiled, at least I found something I could do without feeling guilty.