evilneevil - haha, thanks!
HelR - i'm not sure i understand what you mean by being glad that Tom is still thinking something bad. could you explain a little further?
63 Toms POV
I felt someone shake my shoulder and whimpered, not wanting to open my eyes and get up. "Tom, Tom honey, its time to wake up, we've made you some dinner, and you need to eat. You've slept most of the day!" Danny giggled softly, still shaking my shoulder. Dinner, oh f*ck, I now was defiantly not getting out of bed! Instead, I groaned once more, chucking the duvet over my head, pretending to still be sleepy. "Tom, come on, you can't still be tired! Its time to wake up now! Dinners getting cold!" Danny laughed at me again, tugging a little of the duvet.
I whimpered again and held onto the duvet as much as I could, but I was no match for Dannys strength, he easily pulled the duvet off my head, exposing me to daylight. With a hiss, I pushed my face into the pillow, wait, pillow? Where did that come from?! I hadn't put that there, and why was I laying down? I had fallen asleep on the keyboard and... I hadn't been carried in here, had I? Oh my god, I had been! They had touched me, oh hell, they had touched me and tried to look after me again. Thats not what I wanted! I didn't want to be touched and looked after, thats why I had tried to not cause any attention to myself today. I hadn't told them on purpose that I was released from hospital today, so they didn't have to come round, but they had come round anyway.
I couldn't help it, I started to cry, whimpering into my pillow, trying to be quiet so Danny didn't hear. "oh baby, why are you crying? Its okay, you're in your bed, in your house, nowhere else. Your safe now, your home." Danny whispered, sitting on the bed and rubbing my back. I froze at the touch for a second, crying turning into sobbing when he didn't leave and just carried on trying to comfort me. I wanted to yell at him to stop, to go away and leave me in peace, but I couldn't. There was no way I could actually speak to him, I was too scared to speak around him, and I didn't want to seem angry at him. I wasn't angry at him, I was angry at myself for being here and making him look after me again.
"shhhh, Tom, shhh, its okay, I'm here now, its all alright. I'll take care of you, and keep you safe, don't worry." Danny made me even worse. I didn't want or need to be looked after, I was fine the way I was, really, I didn't need to be looked after. He could go home at anytime, I wasn't going to set the house alight or kill myself somehow if he left me. I was perfectly fine on my own, he could go out and have fun, go be with his boyfriends, his real boyfriends. Not his fake one, the crying whimpering mess of nerves and stupidity that was me, Danny needed to just go away now, before he really started to think I needed looking after.
64 Dannys POV
I didn't know why Tom was crying, but I hoped my guesses were close, and I hoped I was comforting him, not making him worse. "shh, Tom its okay, come on, I need you to stop crying now. Are you crying because your home? Because if you are, if you don't stop, I'll start too, and then we'll both miss dinner!" I tried joking now, having to sit on the hand that wasn't rubbing Toms back. If I didn't, I was going to grab him and sit him on my lap, and hug him until the end of time, no matter what he did. All I wanted to do was hug him and make sure he was alright, but that wasn't going to happen, I somehow knew that doing that would make him worse.
So instead, I carefully edged down the bed until I was laying next to Tom, so if he looked up, he would be facing me. "oh Tom, whats the matter with you, huh? Whats happened? None of us are mad at you if thats what you think, we're not going to shout at you for running away, it was a mistake yes, but we're not mad at you for running away. Your back now, and thats what matters the most, that your here, safe." I sighed, running a hand through his hair, smiling a little as it stuck up in weird little tufts.
It took me another 20 minutes to calm Tom down, then he just laid there, head pressed into the pillow, still not responding to me. "Tom, come on, dinners ready, we gotta go eat now. You need to eat, its been a year since you last ate properly!" I whimpered, trying so hard to get a reaction from him, even a little head nod would have done. "please, you have to get up, baby, please get up! Please, baby, we need you to get up, go downstairs and eat! Its not hospital food anymore, we're not the greatest of cooks, but, its something!" I was begging, holding in tears, Tom needed to move, he had to move. If he didn't move, he wasn't Tom, and if he wasn't Tom, then we were beyond screwed. Tom was usually bouncing around the room, and would have been half way to finishing dinner by now, but now he was laying here, not even moving, the only indication of whether he was alive or not was his breathing.
"look, if you want, I'll bring dinner up here, cause I'll do that for you, if you want. Just give me a nod if you want dinner being brought up here." I whimpered again when nothing happened, Tom was still just, laying there. I wondered if he was asleep, but surely he wouldn't have fallen asleep like this that quickly after crying? "okay, you must be sleeping, or you just don't want to talk to me. I'll go, but just know, dinners ready downstairs, and you can have it whenever you want, just come down and eat. I'll come back later, alright?" I gave up, gently kissing the back of his head and going downstairs, bursting into helpless tears the minute I reached the kitchen.