"Now you better get to the part that has you sittin' here in a waiting room all alone in the middle of the night." He said purposely drawling heavily, trying to make me smile. I had always made it clear that I adored his accent.

Flashback

The past few months had been a series of ups and downs, of hospitalizations and home comings. Charlotte was scheduled for surgery the week after next to close her septal defect and continue work on the atresia.

"Hey Kate, I was wondering if you could take my shift today?" I asked into my cell as I balanced Charlotte in my arm.

"Of course Bells." She replied worry tingeing her voice. She knew that I didn't give up my shifts without a good reason "What's up?"

"Charlotte developed a fever last night and I just want to watch it. I know you and Ange know what to do and how to treat her but I would just feel better if I was home with her."

"No problem Bella," Kate said again "I'll come by tomorrow after work and see how everything is going."

"Ok, talk to you later Kate." I said to my friend "Thanks again."

"Take care tonight Bella." Kate hung up and the line went dead. Thank goodness for great friends.

Angela, Kate, Carmine and Esme had all been taking turns watching over Charlotte when I worked and all loved her almost as much as I did.

"Oh Charlotte," I sighed nuzzling into her cool skin worriedly "What are we going to do with you?"

She cooed up at me and gave me a gummy smile. At 3 ½ months old her personality was coming clear. She was a happy baby for the most part who rarely cried. She loved being held and close to people and was on a very rigid schedule.

With her health problems we'd all agreed that a schedule was the best thing for her. She got fed at specific intervals, she got her medications every eight hours and she even went to the same doctor, Carlisle, at the same time, 2:30, on the same day, Wednesday, every week.

I settled down on my couch and began to feed her- we'd discovered that she was allergic to milk and soy products so she was on a formula called Nutramagen. It was disgusting but she ate it like there was no tomorrow.

With a contented sigh she spit out the nipple and grabbed a chunk of my hair to play with. With a quick stop to the kitchen to drop of her bottle we made it to the bathroom and I ran the sink full of just warm water.

Bath-time was her favorite time of day- she loved splashing around and I am sure that the baby massage she got afterwards helped a lot.

I undressed her and gently placed her in the sink. I did a quick once over of her tiny body looking for bruises and was pleased that there weren't any.

I was surprised though when instead of splashing around like usual she started to close her eyes. We sped through our bath-time ritual and I dressed her in a jumper that would keep her warm against the mid February temperatures and sat down in the nursery.

I laid her down carefully and she was asleep before she even hit the crib's mattress. I reached into the drawer next to her and pulled out a portable oximeter I had gotten from the hospital and wrapped it around her tiny hand. While it was measuring I took her temperature again and was dismayed that she was no longer at the 99 she had been earlier but had risen to 100.

I quickly went to the living room and grabbed the phone dialing Carlisle's number as I headed back to the room to check her oxygen saturation.

"Hello," Carlisle's clear voice said. He sounded to be in a good mood and I could hear laughter wherever he was.

"Carlisle," I rushed panicked by the low percentage. Instead of the 98 or 99% it should have been it was beginning to reach a dangerous zone at only 94%. "Charlotte is sick. I think it's an infection but I need you to look at her."

"What's her oxygen stats?" He questioned. As a heart patient with this particular defect a lowered oxygen stat usually meant a worsening defect.

"94%" I said already grabbing her car seat out of the closet.

"I'll meet you at the hospital," Carlisle said lots of shuffling in the background "I'm already in the car."

He hung up without the pleasantries of goodbyes and I grabbed Charlotte out of her crib. I fastened her tightly and wrapped a blanket around her almost limp form.

I rushed to grab the portable oxygen tank I kept in her closest just in case of an emergency like this and just about forgot all my training in the use of it in my panic and worry.

I ripped into the packaging that covered the tubing keeping it sterile until use and hooked it around her ears. With a little bit of fiddling and I'll admit a few choice curses I managed to turn on the tank and I heard a slight hiss as it started filling the tube.

Her car seat hooked over my arm the oxygen tank tucked in beside her and my purse and keys in the other I almost ran out of the apartment building.

I swear someone must have been having a great laugh at my expense because I hit every single red light during the 20 minute drive to the hospital. By the time I pulled into the emergency room I was red in the face and cursing loudly as I slammed doors.

Normally this noise would have Charlotte screaming but she didn't make even a peep. Carlisle met me at the entrance way and was much calmer than I was- I guess I was becoming one of those crazed momma's who bring their children in here, the ones that take hours to calm down and almost make themselves sick over their children. She really was in every sense of the word my daughter, my precious beautiful daughter, my sick daughter.

"Bella," Carlisle said not removing his eyes from Charlotte who was still asleep and now only clad in her diaper. "I need you to take a deep breath and calm down. This isn't helping Charlotte and you know it as well as I do."

"I just don't know what to do," I cried sitting on the chair next to the bed ensconcing her tiny hand in mine and it was only then that I noted the blue tinge in her fingernail beds. "Carlisle!" I pointed not even bothering to try to cover the un-adulterer fear I was feeling.

"Cyanosis," he muttered under his breath and then he spoke louder "Bella we are going to need to take her up for surgery now. Something has obviously changed in her condition in the last two days."

"Will she be ok?" I asked pleadingly.

"Bella," Carlisle took my hands in his carefully kneeling to my level "We've talked about this before. I promise that I will do everything in my power to keep her safe, but we both know she needs this and that there is a chance that either this won't help or that she won't come out of it."

I sighed and nodded trying to hold back the tears that threatened to spill over. He stood without another word and picked Char up carefully.

I followed them out of the examining room and all the way to the door that read restricted personnel, sterile environment.

"You know where to wait." Carlisle said giving me a small, tired smile.

I moved forward and pressed my lips to Charlotte's cool head, running my fingers over her head carefully and finally turned and walked out of the hospital to both get some fresh air and make a few phone calls.

"Hello," Emmett answered his phone on the first ring.

"Charlotte's in surgery," I blurted collapsing onto a park bench by the hospital entrance the Neon lights of the emergency sign illuminating the area around me.

"What happened?" He asked "I thought she wasn't supposed to go in for another couple of weeks."

"There's been some sort of complication," I sighed tiredly running a hand over my face. "Carlisle took her in. Kate's working my shift tonight because I noticed Char had a fever earlier."

"Bella do you want us to come up?" Emmett asked "Or call dad?"

"I'm calling dad after I get off the phone with you," I said "I'll be ok. You guys don't need to come up- I know you guys are busy."

"We'll come if you want us to," Emmett's boisterous voice was quiet. I love my big bear of a brother. Most people would say he's just a large over excitable brute but he was the most caring, sensitive guy I had ever met and happiness was just his normal emotional state.

"Thanks Em. I'll call you guys in the morning to tell you how it all went."

"No you call us the instant you hear anything I don't care if it's two in the morning I wanna know how my baby niece is doing. Ok?"

"Ok."

"Love you Bells."

"Love you too." And with that I hung up and dialed my dad, Charlie's, work number. I knew he was working because of a conversation that afternoon.

"Chief Swan," Charlie answered curtly and I almost laughed at his brusque voice.

Charlie had raised Emmett and I alone after our mother Renee took off when I was 7. I remember her very vaguely but I have never forgiven her for putting Charlie through hell. He had loved her so much and was a wreck for months after she left.

Emmett had always been forgiving and talked to her on Christmas and his birthday but I couldn't let go of the fact that she abandoned us all. It still hurt and I was intent on being nothing like her. I think that's why I was so angry about Charlotte being abandoned.

"Daddy," I cried. I rarely called him daddy so he knew instantly something was wrong "Charlotte's in surgery. She's getting worse."

"Well you have her at the best place for her right now." He sighed "And you know that Carlisle is probably the best doctor you could ever ask for in her case."

"I know," I nodded even though he couldn't see me "I just don't think I can live if anything happens to her."

"Bella, you're her mother of course you feel that way." He said "I remember when you were 8 and took that fall off the garage roof. Just about impaled yourself my girl." He chuckled at the memory "I felt so sick when I heard your scream. I was terrified you'd punctured a lung or worse, I just kept thinking to myself that I couldn't lose you too."

"I fell off the car," I muttered quietly. When I was 8 Emmett had taken me up to the garage roof and told me that I could slide down a drain attached easily, little did either of us know that there was a small ledge jutting off one side. He missed it completely and I caught myself under my bottom rib and it left an almost foot long red oozing wound on my chest. I was told over and over again that I was lucky I didn't hurt myself worse and I insisted over and over to anyone who would listen that I had fallen off the car roof not the garage because I knew we'd get in trouble for being on the garage.

By the time I came home from school the next day the ledge was sawed off, courtesy Billy Black and my dad, and anything that enabled us to get up to the garage roof was under lock and key. Thinking back on it I understand how scared my dad was to hear me scream.

He scoffed and chuckled quietly "She'll be ok. She's a fighter." He said softly and his words reassured me. "I'll come up after my shift tomorrow, no arguments. I have to go now though Bella. Keep me posted."

"I will." I sighed and hung up the phone again.

Present

"And now you're here." I sighed into Jasper's shoulder. Kate had joined us halfway through my recounting on her break and was sitting beside us a coffee in her hand.

"She's not in SICU yet, I've been calling down every chance I get." She said placing a hand on my shoulder.

Charlotte had been in surgery now for 4 hours and Jasper had been here for 2 of those.

"She'll be fine." Jasper said running his fingers through my hair still. "We just have to be patient."

"Well I gotta run Bell," Kate stood "Angela starts in a couple hours I'll send her down to see you. Keep hoping sweets."

She kissed my forehead and waved goodbye before dancing off.

"Jasper," I said yawning "Thanks for coming."

"Bella," He said sounding exasperated but I could see the sparkle of playfulness in his eyes "I will always come for you. No matter what, where or why I will be there when you need me."