Justin muttered, "Uh … okay."
Justin set his bag down on the floor and walked slowly toward the kitchen island, where Cynthia had re-placed stools following the party. Justin bit his lip and stood behind one of the stools, just staring at Brian's back. Brian's body looked stiff. In Justin's head, questions whirled at breakneck speed. Was Brian only asking Justin to stay out of kindness? Should he have declined? Brian wasn't generally the type to do anything out of simple kindness, that is, with most people … but with Justin, Brian was different. Somehow a little gentler. Justin didn't know what was going on in Brian's head, and this not knowing was killing him. He breathed out slowly and sat down. He really wished Brian would say something. The loft was completely silent except for the drip and sputter of the coffee brewing.
Brian stood facing away from Justin for a couple of minutes. He was, of course, annoyed that Justin was so quick to leave, and the fact that that annoyed him irked him even more. Even worse, he kind of wanted to see Justin again that night, but he wasn't exactly sure how to ask or what Justin would say. The fact that he wasn't sure how Justin would answer or that he cared what that answer would be was likewise irritating. In this way, layer upon layer of annoyance and irritation built up. The topmost layer was caused by the fact that Brian had asked Justin to stay for coffee. Justin was always too close. Brian had done much to keep the boy at bay. So why was he now pulling him back? This pulling him back smacked of need, and Brian was NOT keen on needing anyone, especially not Justin. Brian cursed silently. He couldn't keep ignoring Justin. He grabbed two black mugs out of the cupboard and turned around slowly. He didn't want to seem eager or agitated. He placed both mugs on the island.
Brian and Justin looked at each other for a long, too silent moment. Brian cleared his throat and glanced down at his hands, also now lying on the counter. Then he said, "So I have to go to this movie opening tonight."
Justin quirked an eyebrow. "Oh?" His voice came out higher and shakier than he wanted it to.
Brian looked back up, catching Justin's eyes with his own. He shifted uncomfortably. "Yeah. I don't even know which movie it is. Some chick flick."
Justin's eyes widened.
Brian shook his head as if in answer to an unspoken question. Then he explained, "The Flash guy will be there. I guess he's friends with one of the actresses."
Justin nodded. "Oh …"
"Cynthia thought that would be a good time to pitch him about the pitch."
More nodding. "Sounds perfect, actually."
Brian held Justin's eyes with his own and tilted his head. He raised both eyebrows. For just a moment, his face held a vulnerable expression. Asked a question. Justin's heart did a back flip. He desperately wanted to ask if Brian wanted him to go, but he didn't want to seem eager or to insinuate himself into something Brian did not intend to include him in. So he waited, body frozen, lungs stubbornly refusing to take in air.
The coffeemaker gave Brian an excuse to avoid Justin's eyes. No more sputtering. He grabbed the carafe and filled both their mugs. Then he grabbed milk from the fridge and the sugar from the counter, setting both in front of Justin. When Justin didn't move, Brian added three spoonfuls of sugar and enough milk to make the coffee a dark caramel color. Then he handed Justin a spoon and said, "Stir."
Justin seemed to wake up then. He took the spoon, muttered, "Thanks," and started stirring. Then he took a sip. His eyes widened, and then he smiled warmly. Brian had fixed his coffee perfectly. Justin had no idea Brian had been paying that close attention. While Justin was having this happy revelation, Brian was trying to ignore the smile and the jolt of happiness the smile induced in Brian. He put the milk away and took a sip of his own coffee. Then he asked, as nonchalantly as he could, "So do you have a suit?"
Justin was so taken aback, he said, "Huh?" Justin scrunched his nose. He thought, "Super smooth."
Brian smiled, a genuine smile. He liked putting Justin off kilter. He repeated, this time in a sexy drawl, "Do – you – have – a – suit?"
Justin grimaced. "Um … I do …"
"But?"
"My mom bought it for me before my growth spurt. It's a little small on me." Justin hesitated, but then asked softly, "Why?"
Brian just stared at Justin for a moment. He could write the question off as simple curiosity. He should. Brian didn't know who would be at the opening. And if he met someone he knew, he'd have to introduce Justin as his boyfriend. Saying it in private or to Cynthia was one thing. But telling acquaintances was worse than telling Mikey (or not contradicting Justin). Somehow that would make the situation real. Or more real. Taking Justin to a sort of a work thing. Telling people he might potentially have wanted to fuck that he was no longer available for anything. That he was the type to sort of settle down, be faithful, hold hands. Brian shuddered involuntarily. Justin was looking at him with wide, vulnerable eyes, waiting. Brian leaned over the kitchen island and pressed his forehead against Justin's. He slid a hand up the back of Justin's neck and took a deep breath. He was totally fucked.
Having acknowledged that, he replied, in almost a whisper, but with his eyes still turned down, "I thought you might like to go with me tonight." Then he released Justin and backed up, turning around without looking at Justin and grabbing the carafe. He slowly filled his mug and placed the carafe back onto the burner, without raising his eyes even once.
When he finally did, he immediately regretted it. Justin was smiling like the cat who got the canary. His eyes were wide and bright, dancing. Brian grimaced.
Justin purred, "So … are you asking me?"
Brian gestured with his head (a "duh" gesture).
Justin smiled an even brighter smile. Brian didn't know how he'd managed it. Justin prodded, "So ask me."
Brian blinked. "What?"
Justin turned slightly pink but held his ground. "Ask me."
Brian clenched his jaw and narrowed his eyes. This had no effect on Justin. Brian decided a little hyperbole was in order. He smiled his fakest smile. Then he walked around the kitchen island and said to Justin in his fakest gentlemanly manner, "Justin Taylor, would you do me the honor of allowing me to escort you to a movie opening this evening?"
Justin looked away and narrowed his eyes as though pondering this possibility.
Brian growled, "You know what? Forget it. I'll take Cynthia."
Then suddenly Justin was in Brian's arms, stating urgently, "No, no! I want to go."
Brian tortured Justin for a minute, not touching the boy, not looking at him, not responding. Then he sighed audibly and said, "Fine. I guess."
Justin actually jumped up and down a little. Which … to Brian's continued horror, put a smile on Brian's face. He also slid both arms around Justin's waist and said, "Email me your measurements."
Justin grabbed Brian's face and turned it toward him, holding Brian's eyes with his own, intently. "Why?"
Brian shrugged. He tried to make his tone indifferent as he replied, "Uh so she can get you something to wear that won't embarrass me."
Justin jumped up INTO Brian's arms then (Brian was actually holding Justin, Justin's legs around Brian's waist). Justin hugged Brian hard for a couple of minutes, but then, realizing what he had done, he turned BRIGHT red, slid down to his feet, grabbed his messenger bag, kissed Brian quickly on the cheek, and muttered, "I better go. You know, um, class."
Brian nodded and watched Justin go. Right before Justin disappeared out the door, Brian asked, "Don't you want to know what time?"
Justin turned a brighter red. "Oh yeah."
"7:00. I'll have Cynthia messenger over your suit."
Justin smiled faintly. "Later."
"Later."
Brian headed for the shower. He tried not to think about his choice to do dinner AND a movie. Or the hard on Justin had inspired just by throwing his arms around Brian, by being in Brian's arms. Or the fact that he'd likely be masturbating a few minutes from then, something he hadn't done in years.