xxPUDDxx- haha! and yeah, at least he's talking, but, for how long? ;)
118 Harrys POV
At first, we just did a few shots of us standing in a group, arms around Tom, who was in the centre of us all. I could tell he felt awkward at the attention, but was hiding it brilliantly. To an outsider, Tom looked happy and normal, if just a little shy. Then, the photographer had the 'brilliant' idea that we lifted him up on our shoulders, basically carrying him. We all froze up on that one, that wasn't the best idea ever, not with Tom feeling so self conscious, he hated being the centre of attention, none of us wanted to make him the one everyone was looking at.
"it'll be fine boys! I'm sure the three of you can lift him up, he's tiny!" Misha rolled his eyes, making motions with his hands for us to pick Tom up. "but, what if we drop him?" I asked, looking at Danny, who was biting his lip in worry, scratching at his arm. "I'm sure you won't! You'll be fine, now get going! Lift him up and we'll get snapping again!" Misha encouraged, grinning like mad at us all. "guys, you'll be fine, you've never had a problem lifting each other up before, this isn't any different. Toms probably lighter than Dougie, so you're not going to drop him." Fletch gave us all a stern look, warning us to just do it.
"fine, gunna be okay Tom?" Danny sighed, awkwardly trying to figure out where to put his hands. "y-yeah, I think." Tom nodded, hesitantly putting his hands on mine and Dannys shoulders, letting us lift him onto our shoulders. "there we go! Now Dougie, could you do something too? God this is difficult with four of you." Misha started snapping more photos, Dougie looked around, he had no idea either. Wherever he went, he looked awkward and out of place, so in the end just stood back and let me and Danny carry Tom, playfully lifting him up higher until he cried out (I wasn't sure if it was in pain, fear or joy).
119 Toms POV
I was released eventually, and I finally relaxed a little more when my feet where on firm ground again, its not like I didn't trust the guys...okay, I didn't. I trusted them to not drop me, by accident or on purpose. But I didn't trust them to keep their hands away from my arms, if they felt any cuts, they could have dropped me from shock. Then I would have to deal with the accusations, and possible broken bones. I bruised so easily at the moment, I didn't know if I could break easier as well.
"right, solo shots! Tom you're up first." Misha called, I held back another whimper. Why was he focusing on me? I didn't get why he was focusing on me so much, unless he was like the other magazine, wanting them to rip me to shreds. I knew the magazines were trying to not-so-gently hint that I didn't belong here, but I didn't get why, when I already knew I didn't belong, I didn't really belong anywhere to be honest. "hey, stop looking so sullen! Cheer up Tom!" Misha caught me, so I straightened my back and put on another smile. "sorry, I'm a bit tired, didn't get much sleep last night." I wasn't lying there, I didn't sleep at all last night, worrying too much about today.
Misha made me stand in the middle of the set, telling me to look casual and happy. I honestly tried to as well, but I didn't know how to look casual, I was too stressed, too anxious, too in need of a razor blade. The thoughts of blood were circling round my head like the blood as it slipped down the drain the shower, which was panicking me, I wasn't used to not being able to just run and cut, waiting was tearing my nerves apart. And every time someone looked at me, I couldn't help but have a little voice inside my head scream run away! They think your disgusting! It made me want to cry, to just break down in tears on the floor, in the middle of the room.
"come on Tom! Give me something to work with! Smile for gods sake!" Misha warned, glaring at me. "I-I'm sorry! I-I'm trying!" I whimpered, knowing I was letting everyone down right now. "try harder." Misha glared, this was it, I could feel the tears well up in my eyes. I hated the pressure that was being put on me, I couldn't smile, I was trying, I really was, but I couldn't! I couldn't smile, or relax. Right now, I just wanted a cuddle off someone, a certain someone from Bolton who would tell me it would be okay. "your doing well Tom! We're proud of you!" Harry called, grinning widely at me. Dougie made his Chewbacca noise, grinning at me too. They were trying to make me smile, relax me a little, it broke my heart. Wait, where was Danny?
"don't cry baby, please don't. Look who I got you, it'll be over soon, I promise." Danny made me jump by wrapping his arms around me from behind, slipping Mickey Mouse into my hands. How the hell did he find him? I had hidden him in my backpack, because I was silly and childish and needed the toy to feel okay. "you're doing well, we're all behind you, just relax a bit, stop shaking." Danny placed a burning kiss to my shoulder, before letting me go and walking back to the sidelines again. And stupidly, that d*mn kiss, hug, and presence of a toy was enough to relax me a little bit. The urge to cry went a little, and I didn't feel so panicked. I cursed Danny and his fake love, and my stupid love for him, my legs felt like jelly now he had kissed me. Why wasn't I over him yet?!