Sorry for the long wait! Here is chapter 6!
The Trouble With Men Is
Chapter 6
... Their Knack for Violence!
Ha. And they thought angry Sakura was bad. Hell hath no fury like an angry geezer
Sakura couldn't help but admire how nice and clean his car was and how nice he looked. He was wearing black dress pants and a simple blue dress shirt with an open collar. She could see why girls fawned over him. He looked like he stepped right out of an action movie where he saves the girl from the burning building and then takes her on his speedboat where they drive off into the sunset and find themselves on a beach somewhere in Hawaii... Okay let's not get carried away on the first date. Sakura mentally snapped herself out of her fantasy.
She also could not understand why he went for her. He was a stud while she was just... well... her. She didn't have gigantic breasts or long, shiny hair. Sakura always thought of herself as rather plain looking. She was wearing something just as simple as he has, blue jeans and a dark blue top, yet she couldn't pull it off half as well as he could.
"Man, I did not know you lived at the party house." He flashed her a row of pearly whites.
"Oh yeah, it's super." She gave a sarcastic smile. "You know, living with ten guys and all. Fun."
"I know what you mean." He said.
"You deal with ten hormonal driven guys as well?"
Hidan chuckled, "Not exactly. I also live in an all guy house except for one girl. Except her conditions are slightly better than yours considering the fact that she's banging one of the guys on the side."
"Well let's hope I never have to resort to that." Sakura laughed nervously.
"So how exactly did you end up living with those crazy kids?" He asked.
"Wait sorry, I'm getting a call." She felt her phone vibrate and saw Naruto's ID on her cell phone. She rolled her eyes.
"What do you want, Naruto?" She hissed angrily into the phone.
"Hola, who ees theese Naruto person you speak of? I am not Naruto. I am your fazzur, young lady. I demand you to come home nao and dump that idiot you arrr dating."
"Naruto I have caller ID."
There was a pause on the other line. She heard mumbling in the background.
"Ohhh Naruto! Arrr remember eem! He was nice boy who lent me phone! You know, you should consider dating eem instead! He is way better than the creep you arrr weeth!"
"Okay, first of all, my father doesn't have a mixture of what can only be a pirate accent with bits of French, Cantonese and Transylvanian thrown in. Second of all, I am turning my phone off after this conversation. And lastly, don't eat all the cookie dough and fried bacon I left in the fridge."
"Wait, what? You left cookie dough and fried bacon in the fridge?" Naruto said, completely forgetting about whom he was supposed to be impersonating.
"Nope, but gotcha. See? Being tricked isn't so fun, is it?" And with that, she hung up the phone.
"Who the heck was that?" Hidan said as Sakura huffily threw her phone in her bag. "Was someone pretending to be your dad?"
"Just one of my overly protective housemates." She replied hastily, wanting to quickly change the subject. "So where are we going tonight?"
Hidan passed her another dashing smile, as he wagged his finger, "It's a surprise."
Sakura chucked nervously, "Lovely... more surprises."
"Here we are," Hidan said pulling up onto the curb, "I don't usually take girls here on the first date but I have a really good feeling about the two of us so..."
The rest of the words Hidan spoke were lost on Sakura as she saw the location of their first date.
Konoha Titty Bar
Best Strip Joint in Town!
Topless wommen drink for free! (So ladies, get rid of those constraints and let your knockers fly!)
Seriously, no good can come from a place that spells "wommen" wrong.
"What do you think they're doing right now?"
"She's probably on her knees right now giving him the best blow-"
"Okay Kiba, that's enough out of you."
Kiba, Lee, Naruto, Chouji and Shikamaru were lounging around in the living room attempting to watch television.
"Seriously though, when did Hidan get back out onto the market? I thought he was dating that Ino chick?" Lee said glumly as he mindlessly flipped through channels.
"Yamanaka, Ino?" Kiba said incredulously, "Damn, that blonde is hot as hell. Seriously, what is this guy's secret?"
"What happened to the two of them? Did he dump her?" Naruto asked.
"Nope," Jiraiya said, strolling casually into the living room, "Word on the street is that she dumped him. First time he's ever been dumped, apparently. Devastated the poor fellow, though he'd never show it."
"Does anyone find it creepy that Jiraiya randomly strolls into our house without warning and just jumps into the middle of our conversations?" said Kiba.
"Not as creepy as the fact that he knows more gossip than we do." said Shikamaru.
"What?" Jiraiya said defensively, "I'm old, I'm retired... there's not much to do around here than spy on girls in the locker room err- I mean spy on boys err- I mean... oh forget it. You guys all know what I do and how I do it."
There was an awkward pause.
"You know, you could get into a lot of trouble if you get caught." Shikamaru finally said, in an attempt to break the silence.
"Totally worth it." Jiraiya winked at them.
"This is way too depressing," Kiba finally said, "Let's go to my room and kill some zombies on my Xbox. We'll name all of them Hidan."
"Sounds good. And yes Jiraiya, you can come, and no Jiraiya, you cannot play." Naruto added.
"What? Why?" Jiraiya whined.
"Sorry bro, game is reserved only for those born after the 1900s." Kiba grinned.
"Why you-" Jiraiya growled, "You're lucky you're pretty... and that you pay me 700 dollars a month... and let me look at your playboy magazines..."
"You know where my porn stash is?"
"Dude... everyone does." Chouji said.
"Lovely place here," Sakura said as she sidestepped a stripper giving a guy a lap dance, "Very... lively."
"I knew you'd like it." Hidan grinned at her. "Feel free to take your top off." He leaned close to her and whispered, "You are kind of the only woman in here with it on."
"Hidan, I'm the only woman in here who's not employed at Konoha Titty Bar." She said, "And I think I'll keep my top on, thank you very much."
The bar was tacky and cheap. There were tables with poles attached to the center and a stripper dancing on each one. The floors were dirty muddy and the walls were covered with pages from playboy magazines (she even recognized some of the pictures from flipping through Kiba's magazines). The lights were dim and the room was covered with a light layer of smoke from all the cigarettes. Even with the bad lighting, she could've sworn she saw her physics professor in the corner, wearing his usual obnoxious green sweater-suit.
"So," Hidan said, putting his arm around her, "which stripper do you want to sit under?"
"They all look so... bare. Is it possible for us to get a table without someone's ass print?"
"Oh come on Sakura," Hidan said, "That ruins the whole experience of this bar."
"Well we wouldn't want that to happen." Sakura said sarcastically, "Just... you pick."
"Thanks," he said, kissing her lightly on the cheek, "I promise, this will be an unforgettable night."
"Oh God it really is going to be, isn't it?" Sakura said, trying to hide the dread in her voice.
It was going to be a very, very long night, and very, very unforgettable night.
Or so she thought.
When Sakura woke up, she felt like a huge truck had just hit her. Her head was pounding and she was overcome with waves of nausea.
"W-wh-where am I?" She thought to herself as she tried to raise her head up. The room was dark and the shades were drawn. She could barely see anything. "W-What happened?"
"Oh God." Her mind jumped to the worst possible conclusion. "I didn't- Oh God I hope." She looked under the sheet, and to her relief, she was still in last night's clothing. She looked to the other side of the bed and found that it was empty. "Oh thank God..."
She tried to remember what happened in the past twelve hours, but everything was a blank. It hurt her head just to think about it.
The last thing she recalls was sitting in a grimy table where a stripper whose breasts could've covered an entire country was dangling above her. She remembered drinking beer from a very questionable glass. She couldn't quite recall how many glasses she had...
"You're up." A voice called to her in the darkness. "How are you feeling?"
Her heart began to pound as she tried to look around to find the source. "Who's there? Who are you? Where am I?"
The figure drew closer and Sakura could see his dark hair and distinct eyes that seemed to glow red in the darkness. He looked very, very, familiar.
"Sas-Sasuke?" Sakura called out hopefully.
"I apologize." The figure in the shadows replied as he loomed closer and closer, "I am not Sasuke."
"Where's Sakura!" Naruto said impatiently to his fellow housemates. "She's still not home yet... and as of two minutes ago, she hasn't been home in fifteen hours and thirty six minutes! If she's not home within the next half hour, I'm calling the cops!"
"She's probably still at that bastard's place... in his bed, no less." Kiba replied, looking slightly annoyed, "Damn, and I wanted to be the one to take her virginity."
"Why is it, that every time I talk to you guys, it's about some girl's virginity?" Neji wondered out loud.
"Don't lie, Neji." Naruto said, "Admit it. You're worried about her too."
"Ha, the only thing I'm worried about is losing my lab partner." He said, looking down. He hates to admit it, but he was worried.
"I swear," Naruto clenched his teeth as he tightened his fists, "If that bastard hurts Sakura even a little bit... I'll fucking rip him to pieces."
"Naruto, don't jump to conclusions," Sasuke said, coming into the conversation. It seems as though they all came downstairs, expecting breakfast, only to find their maid missing. "Maybe it was consensual."
It all happened in a flash.
Naruto's fists connected with Sasuke's face, as Naruto howled in anger. Kiba, Neji and Chouji grabbed Naruto with all their strengths and pulled him off of Sasuke, who clutched his bleeding nose angrily.
"WHAT THE FUCK, NARUTO!" He shouted and lunged forward towards Naruto. It took a total of four guys, Lee, Shino, Gaara, and Shikamaru, to suppress Sasuke from beating the living daylights out of Naruto.
"DON'T. YOU. DARE. TALK. ABOUT. SAKURA. LIKE. THAT!" Naruto screamed back at Sasuke, "YOU. DON'T. KNOW. SHIT! SO. STOP. TALKING. YOU. BASTARD!"
Naruto and Sasuke began struggling even hard, trying to land a blow on the other.
"Naruto, calm do-"
"SHUT UP AND LET ME KILL-"
"No Sasuke! Killing Naruto will not solve-"
"Hey guys! Want to hear a funny joke! It's about-"
"YOU SHUT UP OR I'LL KILL YOU TOO-"
"Both of you need to-"
"QUUUIIIIEEEETTTT!" A voice boomed. It was so loud that all nine boys stopped mid action. They turned towards the kitchen entrance to face a very, very, very angry Jiraiya.
Ha. And they thought angry Sakura was bad.
Hell hath no fury like an angry geezer.
"I-I don't understand. H-How did I end up here?"
"I'm sorry. I know all this must seem pretty strange and scary to you." He replied solemnly. "But before I explain anything, please eat something." He handed her a loaf of bread, a glass of water, and an Advil. "It'll help with the headache."
"T-Thank you. I-I don't want to seem rude, but who are you? I-I mean I know who you are. I see you in my calculus class..." she trailed off nervously.
He pulled out a chair next to her and sat down. Smiling slightly, he replied, "My name is Uchiha, Itachi."
That last name sounded awfully familiar to Sakura, but she couldn't exactly place a finger on it.
"W-what happened to m-me?"
"First, tell me how much you remember from last night." Itachi said.
Sakura lifted herself up so her head rested against the backboard of the bed. The room was dark and she could barely see Itachi, even when she squinted.
"I apologize. Is the room too dark? I assumed light would be bad for your head right now."
"No, no, it's fine." Sakura replied, "I just wanted to see your... well, never mind."
She blushed slightly, completely thankful that he could not see her reddening cheeks.
She forced herself to eat the food and she felt slightly better. She tried to remember what happened last night.
The strip joint was pretty loud and the two of them had to talk over the music and the moans of the lucky men receiving lap dances. She remembered talking about advanced calculus with him, and how he almost failed that class in third year. Apparently he passed that class by taking the T.A who was grading the final out on a date and then taking her to his bedroom where they did, according to him, "division of the legs". What else did they talk about again?
Oh right. Sakura remembered she didn't actually do much talking about all. It was mostly Hidan, bragging about his amazing clinches on the football field and about how many girls he hooked up with... and that he was into S&M?
Where on Earth did she get that? She really hoped that was just part of her wild imagination.
She told Itachi as much as she could, except the details of their conversation of course.
So, in reality, she didn't tell him much at all.
"The last thing I remember thinking was how flashy the stripper's head dress was ..." She told him, "And everything is kind of fuzzy after that..."
"Did the head dress resemble this?" Itachi said, getting up from his seat and showing a long elaborate head dress that dangled with peacock feathers and beads.
"Oh yes! It looked exactly like that!" Sakura said, "Where on Earth did you get that? I thought the stripper made it herself and-" She gasped.
No.
She didn't!
"P-please don't tell me that's the same one from last night..."
Itachi shrugged. "I don't know. It was in your hand when I found you."
"OH. MY. GOD" Sakura thought miserably as her brain screamed, "I stole from a stripper!"
"I know what this looks like," Sakura said meekly, "I-I swear, I don't know how I ended up with that. Please don't report me to the cops. Maybe someone framed me when you found me and-" She paused for a moment. "Wait, you found me? Where?"
"On the couch of our living room."
Sakura frowned slightly, "Any idea how I got there?"
He shrugged his shoulders and replied, "I was coming home from work at around three in the morning, and I just found you lying there. I didn't want Hidan to find you again and get any ideas so I took you to my room. "
Sakura buried her head in her hands. She could almost feel steam rising from her face. She had never felt so humiliated in her entire life.
And then- as if God felt like he has not punished her enough...
"Err-" Itachi said awkwardly, "I don't know if this is the best time to bring this up, but I also found this on you when I found you."
"Well it can't be much worse than-" Sakura said as she looked up and then stopped in her tracks. "What on Earth...
...Is that?
...Is that a...
...Thong?"
"Okay Sakura. The key is to stay calm. They have no idea what happened last night and if they ask you, you just say... heck, they probably don't even know you're still missing. Oh wait no, they have to know... the breakfast you were supposed to be making is three hours late."
Seriously, this is just becoming the worst hangover ever.
Sakura slowly walked up the front steps. She took a deep breath and slowly turned the knob, Before she had a chance to open the door, it door flew open and she was face to face (or rather face to faces) with her entire house (or what seemed like her entire house... it's easy to lose count).
"Err-" She said awkwardly, "Hi guys. Sorry about breakfast. I hope Chouji hasn't eaten anyone yet."
"Nah, he's fine." Shikamaru replied, looking relieved to see her, "He always has a stash of backup Twinkies hidden in his closet."
Naruto had planned on ranting to her about not calling them and how worried they were, but once he saw her, all of his anger abated and he was just glad she was safe. The rest of the house seemed to feel the same way. Jiraiya probably would've made a scene but he fell asleep in the living room while watching the Victoria Secret Fashion show on television. Apparently, being angry for five minutes took a lot out of him.
"So, you spend the night, eh?" Kiba said, "Finally gave someone your V card?"
"Nope. We were out pretty late and I didn't want to wake you guys up so I just spent the night on his couch."
"Really." Sasuke said, suddenly interested, "Did you see any of his house mates?"
Sakura paused and thought about the situation for a second. Does she really want to tell them about her date at the Titty Bar? And how she woke up in a stranger's bed with a stripper's headdress and thong?
"No," Sakura replied, "Not really. I think I heard someone come home late at night but it was too dark to see anything. And when I woke up everyone was gone so I just left his place and came... here."
"Phew." Lee said in relief, "So nothing happened between the two of you?"
"Nope." She said, "Nothing at all. And honestly, he's really not my type I don't think I'll be going out on a another date with him."
"Where did he take you?" Shikamaru asked.
"Oh you know... just a local restaurant. I can't really remember the name."
"How was the food? What did you order?" Chouji asked.
"I ordered the um... chicken breast. They gave me huge portions." Sakura improvised.
The guys continued to bombard her with questions.
"So really nothing happened?"
"You're not secretly in love with him, are you?"
"Did you give him a blow-"
"Okay guys." Sakura chuckled nervously, "I think I'm done with being interrogated. If you don't mind, I'm just going to go to my room to change my clothes and rest for a bit."
Sakura was finally in the peace and quiet of her own room, where she had time to go through the events of the past twenty hours. She felt scared and vulnerable.
Just what on Earth happened in those missing hours? She knew that her and Hidan didn't engage in any sort of intercourse (thank God), but she still couldn't help but feel violated. How on Earth did she end up in Hidan's living room? Did he just leave her there? And where was he?
She definitely did not recall drinking that much. Besides, it's not like last night was the first time she ever drank or got drunk before. However, this was the first time she blacked out for nearly twelve hours.
There were still a lot of things she wanted to ask Itachi, but given the circumstances of their encounter... all she wanted to do was get out of there ASAP.
Something (well actually, a lot of things) didn't add up and she knew what she had to do.
Sakura nervously knocked on Sasuke's door. It took a lot of courage, but she finally mustered up enough to ask him. She had never been in his room before. Actually, now that she thinks about it, half of the guys didn't want her to clean their rooms. The only rooms she had actually been in were Kiba (unfortunately), Chouji, Naruto (also unfortunately), Shikamaru and Lee's.
The door opened slightly and Sasuke came out and closed the door behind him before Sakura managed to get a good look.
"Yes?" he asked curtly.
"Umm... well, I was wondering..." Sakura said nervously, twisting her hands. "You do research at the hospital, right?"
"Yes."
"Well I was hoping that you could um... help me out with something? Please? I know it's really out of line for me to ask and you'll probably say no and I feel horrible for asking something and putting you on the line like this but I really, really need help but I don't really want to go-"
"Just tell me what you want." He cut her off impatiently.
"Could you possibly get me into the drug testing lab?" she blurted out.
"What? Why do you want to go there?" He looked at her suspiciously.
"Shit. I forgot I need to tell him why I want a drug test... oh God oh God I did not think this through..."
"Well," She laughed nervously, "You see, I'm kind of doing this as a favor for a friend of mine. She has a new job that requires her to do a drug test."
"So... she can sign up for one like a regular person instead of sneaking in." Sasuke replied.
"Well, you see. She umm... well, I really shouldn't be saying this, but she's quite the pothead. She's trying an experiment to see how long the drugs will last in her system. And, and" Sakura rumpled through her pockets, "she will pay you... twenty six dollars and thirty eight cents. Oh, she'll also throw in a 20% discount coupon to the campus bookstore."
"Hmm... let me think." Sasuke said, "Twenty six dollars and thirty eight cents... or potentially getting fired from work and possible time in jail?"
"...You forgot the 20% off coupon..." Sakura said meekly.
"Well that makes a huge difference."
"Please Sasuke." Sakura was practically begging, "I really- I mean, my friend really needs help on this."
Sasuke sighed, "I can help you out. Only if you stop lying and tell me exactly what's going on."
"The truth?" Sakura groaned slightly, "Well... I think, I think my friend might've been given the date rape drug."
Sasuke stared at her for a moment, "Your... friend?"
Sakura nodded, "Yeah, she kind of wants to keep it on the down low. She knows if she goes to the hospital they're just going to make a big deal out of it and she really doesn't want that in her life right now. She just wants to find out for sure. And then she just wants to forget about the whole thing and pretend it never happened."
He continued to stare at her. Sakura was afraid to look at him face on in fear that she might burst into tears and give the whole thing away.
"Alright. Meet me at the back entrance of the hospital at twenty past ten tonight."
"Thank you. Thank you so much. This really means a lot to me... and her. Mostly her." She added hastily.
"Tell this friend of yours drink at least eight cups of water and to not go to the bathroom two hours prior."
Sakura arrived promptly on time at the backdoor to the hospital at exactly ten-twenty with a urine sample in a small jar (hers, of course, but she wasn't going to let Sasuke know that).
Sasuke popped his head out the back door. "Pass me the sample. I'll be back with the results in around ten minutes."
She handed him the jar, and blushed slightly. Seriously, it's not everyday you hand your urine to a cute guy.
"Thanks again." She said gratefully, "I owe you. Big time."
He nodded curtly and shut the door.
Sakura leaned against the wall and waited. She had never been so nervous in her entire life... well that's not entirely true, but that's neither here nor there.
"Sakura?"
She looked up to see a boy with flaming red hair and pale skin. His blue eyes contrasted greatly against his dark lashes, and even more so in the dark.
"Gaara? What are you doing here?"
"I should be asking you the same thing."
"I'm just waiting for a friend of mine who works here." She half-lied, "You?"
"I'm visiting my father."
"Oh, is he a doctor here?"
"No... he's a patient."
"I'm... I'm really sorry. Is he okay?"
Gaara shrugged his shoulders. "Listen, I'd really appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone about seeing me here."
"Oh no of course not." Sakura replied, "Just know that if there's anything I can do for you, please let me know. I know how difficult losing someone can be. My mother died of cancer a couple of years ago and it was really hard on my dad and I."
"I'm sorry to hear that." Gaara said, "I never knew my mother. She died giving birth to me."
Sakura cringed. She had wanted to make him feel better... not remind him of his dead mother.
"Do you have any siblings?"
"I have an older brother and sister."
"Well, what I find most helpful during hard times is just... really bonding with family members. Being alone never helps."
Gaara nodded. "Thanks."
Sakura smiled lightly, "Like I said, I'm here if you need someone to talk to."
"Thanks again... and I guess I'll see you around." And with that, he turned the corner and faded from sight.
Seconds later, Sasuke came out from the door. "Well that was an awkward conversation."
Sakura jumped at the sound of his voice, "Oh God you scared me. Were you listening in the entire time?"
"Well I couldn't just come out and give you the results to this illegal drug test in the middle of your conversation, now could I?" He said, "Though that probably would've made things a lot less awkward... and a lot more interesting."
"Oh gosh, the results! I almost forgot! Well... did you find... anything?"
He showed her the chart, "I have good news and bad news. Good news is there was no date rape drug in her system... bad news is your friend isn't eating enough vegetables and should probably lay off the carbs."
"Hey, I was only eating a lot of carbs as a way to- err- I mean, I'm sure my friend has a very good reason for consuming so much carbs. Probably because she's so tired all the time."
Sakura felt as if a big weight has been lifted off her chest. "You have no idea how happy and relieved this makes me... and my friend when I tell her the good news!"
"Tell your friend that, if someone is drinking on an empty stomach, or if they're dehydrated and they're sleep deprived or stressed out and tired, blacking out is common." Sasuke said, "I see it happen to Naruto and Chouji all the time."
"Huh. Wow. I can't seem to picture Chouji with an empty stomach."
"Nah, he was just sleep deprived."
"Ah," Sakura said with a smile, "and the world makes sense again. Listen, I can't thank you enough Sasuke. I really, really appreciate this."
Sasuke shrugged his shoulders, "No big deal. Listen, you go on ahead, I still have some numbers and papers I have to go over and it's probably going to take another hour or two."
"Okay, I'll see you back home. Thanks again!"
"Yeah."
He watched Sakura run out of sight before he got into his car and drove off. Twenty minutes later, he was parked in front of 36 Akatsuki Road.
He pounded on the door.
"Coming... coming..." he heard someone inside say as footsteps clattered down the stairs. The door opened and Sasuke was face to face with Hidan.
"What the fuck do you want at this hour- Sasuke?"
"You're just the guy I was looking for." Sasuke said coldly.
Hidan leaned against the door and snorted, "Why's that, you little shit."
"Are you home alone?"
"Yeah, so?"
"Perfect." With one swift kick from Sasuke, Hidan doubled over in pain, completely winded.
Sasuke went into the house and locked the door behind him.
"What the FUCK!" Hidan wheezed.
"Don't worry, I don't want much... just a little payback."
"Payback? For what?"
"Old habits die hard I guess," Sasuke said as he cracked his knuckles, "didn't think a big stud like you would still need drugs to get into a girl's pants. Though that didn't work out too well for you last night, did it? Normally I wouldn't give a shit, but you just picked the wrong house to mess with."
Cliffhanger! I know I left a lot of crap up in the air... guess you'll have to keep reading to find out! I know I suck at updating... =(
I'll try my best to have the next chapter up within the next two weeks!
Thanks to all the people who reviewed! Really appreciate it! =)
With Love,
OnlyTheGoodDieYoung
P.S. with pairings, it seems like it's going to be Sasuke/Sakura, though Itachi/Sakura is a very close second.
P.P.S. Check out my other stories if you get a chance! :) :) If you like this one, then you won't be disappointed!