A/N I know that some of you are wondering why Castle is still following Kate. Even though she's married to Josh. The best reason would be that he would rather have her in his life as a partner than not at all. I've briefly touched on this in this chapter. And they will explore it more as the story progresses.

Kate was sitting on the curb waiting for him the next morning. She didn't want to risk him coming inside and seeing her house without furniture.

When they pulled up to her house that morning, she smiled when she saw Alexis sticking her head out the window and waving at her. It was obvious to Kate that the little girl was excited to see her.

She smiled and heard Castle say, "That looks good on you."

Kate gave him a look and asked, "What does?"

Castle smiled over at her and whispered, "Your smile."

They looked at each other and smiled. Castle leaned forward and for a split second, Kate thought he was going to kiss her, but the moment was broken when Alexis asked, "What are you guys doing? I want to get to the house so we can go swimming!"

Kate jumped and Castle shook his head and laughed. Then he took her suitcase and put it in the car.

Kate sat in the car, put her sunglasses on and asked Alexis, "How are you going to go swimming? It's December and very cold out."

Alexis smiled and told her, "The pool is heated. Daddy did that so that we could go swimming when it was cold outside."

"Your daddy's pretty smart."

Alexis smiled brightly and with the confidence and admiration that only a six year old little girl can manage she said, "He is. He's the smartest daddy in the whole wide world."

Kate smiled at her partners little girl, "Wow. That's pretty smart."

"He knows everything. He's the bestest daddy in the whole world. I love him so much."

Kate looked out the window and felt tears pricking her eyes. How she wished that her child would think that about his or her father. Instead, they had a father that didn't want them. That he was divorcing it's mother because he didn't want him or her. She sighed softly and apparently it wasn't too softly because Castle asked, "Are you okay?"

Kate tried to smile and she said, "I'm fine."

Castle didn't think she was fine. She sounded upset. Sad even. He knew that if he wasn't driving, he could have studied her more and been able to get the truth out of her. However, he didn't want to confront her in front of Alexis. So, he decided that he would talk to her later.

For the rest of the trip, Kate and Alexis played a bingo game that he kept in the car for Alexis for the ride up to the house in the Hamptons. Alexis won most of the games that they played, but he loved the fact that his daughter was able to make Kate laugh. He'd always thought that there was nothing better than the sound of her laughter. Well, except the sound of his daughters laughter.

Castle had debated long and hard whether or not to invite Kate to spend the holidays with them. He'd wondered if he was just going to end up regretting spending this time with Kate. Part of him wondered if she and Josh would kiss and make up and then he would only be left with the memory of this Christmas that they spent together.

He did know that he wouldn't stand in her way. If she wanted to try and make things work with Josh, he would step aside.

The day that she had married Josh, he had went and gotten rip-roaring drunk. He had very nearly walked away from her and from their partnership for good. However, the thought of never seeing her beautiful face again, was something he couldn't bare. He would much rather have her in his life as a friend, then lose her altogether.

He had tried to put on a happy face for her. Tried to go on like nothing had changed. It was hard, but he would do it. Simply for the chance to be with her.

When he'd seen the divorce papers sitting on her desk, he had to admit that he was happy. However, when he saw her crying in the breakroom all he wanted to do was put a smile on her face again. So, he'd made a split second decision to invite her to join him and Alexis for the holidays. For a brief moment, he wondered if she would say no. He prayed that she wouldn't, but he'd held his breath.

When she said yes, he couldn't stop the smile that came to his face.

He was brought out of his musings when he heard Alexis say, "Daddy! Are you even paying attention to me?"

Castle laughed and shook his head, "I'm sorry Pumpkin. What did you say?"

Alexis sighed dramatically and shook her head, "You should really pay more attention."

Castle heard Kate laugh and the sound was like music to his ears. He would do whatever he could to hear that sound as often as possible. He smiled and said, "You're right Pumpkin. I should. And I'm sorry. What did you say?"

He didn't have to see his daughters face to know that she was rolling her eyes at him. She was six going on sixteen. He heard her ask, "I wanted to know if we can walk to the store when we get there."

Castle nodded, "I can walk with you and..."

"No daddy. I want to go with Kate. I need to get your Christmas present and..."

"Didn't you already get me a present?"

Alexis sighed again, "Have you been peeking at the presents again daddy?"

"Uh no..."

"Then how did you know I got you a present?"

"I just guessed..."

"Daddy..."

He heard Kate laugh again and he smiled, "I'm not sure if Kate wants to..."

Castle smiled when he heard Kate say, "I would love to walk with her. I can stretch my legs. They are a bit stiff."

"See daddy. She doesn't mind."

Castle nodded and smiled at his daughter, "Okay. Then who am I to stop you from going."

"Yay! You will love it Kate. The general store in town has everything you can imagine. They have this amazing fudge that melts in your mouth and..."

Castle smiled at his daughter's enthusiasm. He took a second to glance over at Kate and he noticed the smile on her face. However, there was a touch of sadness on her face. She looked almost wistful. She finally closed her eyes and fell asleep. When he heard nothing from the backseat, he realized that Alexis had drifted off also.

They arrived at the house an hour later. Alexis woke first and called out, "Wake up Kate! We are here!"

His daughter got out of the car and ran around the car. Then she disappeared into the house. Castle smiled and reached over to wake Kate. He smiled at her and said, "We made it."

Kate smiled, "And in one piece to."

"Yep."

She smiled at him and he felt his heart skip a beat. God how he loved her. He would always love this remarkable woman. If only she had known his feelings before she had met and married Josh. If only he hadn't been so afraid of losing her. Because in the end, he'd lost any chance he had ever hoped to have with her.

Castle got out of the car and headed inside. It was surprisingly warm that day. It couldn't have been colder than sixty degrees. He knew where Alexis had went to. She always headed to her room to put on a bathing suit.

So, when she came out dressed in her bathing suit a few minutes later, Castle laughed and told her, "I want to give Kate the tour and then we can go swimming."

Alexis nodded and sat down to wait for her father. Their first night away was wonderful. They had gone swimming and were relaxing by a bonfire on the beach. Tomorrow, Kate and Alexis were going to the general store in town.

The next day dawned bright and sunny. Kate woke up and dressed for the day. She smiled when she heard Alexis giggling and it was a sound that warmed her heart. When she walked into the kitchen and saw Castle and Alexis sitting there, she smiled and asked, "Why didn't you wake me?"

Alexis sighed and pointed at her father, "I wanted to, but daddy wouldn't let me. He said that you needed your beauty sleep."

Kate laughed and leveled a glare at Castle, "Oh really?"

"I didn't say that. I..."

"You did to daddy. You said..."

Castle started tickling her and that stopped her from telling on him. She finally called out, "Stop it daddy! I give up!"

Kate simply smiled and ate her breakfast. The scene between Castle and his daughter was bittersweet to her. Castle was such a wonderful father. He truly loved Alexis and she could tell that the feeling was mutual. This is what she wanted for her baby, but she knew that it was probably not meant to be. Josh wasn't Castle and while he was a good doctor, she was starting to realize that he wasn't a good man.

Kate heard Alexis ask, "Are you ready Kate?"

Finishing her breakfast, Kate nodded and told her, "Lead the way!"

Alexis smiled and took Kate's hand as they walked out of the house, Castle could hear his daughter chattering all the way.

Everything was normal on the walk down to the store. Alexis found what she was looking for and proudly paid for her purchase. When they got back, Alexis wanted to go swimming on the beach. Kate thought that idea was lovely. The weather was nice, so Castle agreed.

The rest of the Christmas holiday went wonderfully. They ate too much and drank too much. Kate had to admit that she didn't want to go back home.

What happened on Christmas night left her speechless and questioning her feelings for Castle and for her soon to be ex-husband.

Martha and Alexis had gone to bed. Leaving Castle and Kate sitting up talking. Castle kept making her laugh. It felt like she hadn't laughed in years. It felt so good to laugh again. Castle finally looked at her and asked, "Talk a walk with me?"

Kate nodded, "Gladly."

She grabbed her coat and they walked outside together. She was surprised when he reached for her hand, but it somehow felt right. So, when he tried to let go, she held on tight. He raised an eyebrow, but didn't pull his hand away.

Soon, they found their way to the beach. The night air felt wonderful to Kate. The air was so different here. It was clean and fresh. She found herself wishing that they didn't have to go back to reality. When she looked back on it later, she would wonder why she did what she did. They reached the beach and sat down on the sand. She felt so safe with him. She had always felt safe with him. There was a time when she had thought she was falling in love with him, but then she had met Josh. She had been swept off of her feet by the handsome doctor. Looking back, she realized that she had made a big mistake. Marrying Josh had been a huge mistake on her part. Now, she could admit that she regretted not giving Castle a chance.

So, when she was sitting on the beach with him, she forgot about everything she was trying to escape from. She forgot about Josh. She forgot about the baby that she carried. She forgot that she was married. All she could think about was the man sitting beside her. The man who had never given up on her. No matter what. She turned her head to look at him and before she knew it, she was kissing him.

She felt his hands cup her cheeks and she realized how easy it would be to let him take her to bed. How she could use him to forget all of her troubles. Then she realized that she couldn't do that to him. It wasn't fair to him. She was, after all, a married woman. In that split second, she realized that she no longer loved her husband. She loved the one man that had always stood by her side. Even when she didn't deserve it.

She finally pulled away and whispered, "I'm sorry."

Castle shook his head, "No. I'm the one that's sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I..."

She wanted to tell him the real reason why she and Josh were divorcing. Wanted to tell him about the baby. She wanted to tell him so many things. Mostly, she wanted to tell him how sorry she was. For marrying Josh. Instead, Kate put her hand on his cheek and whispered, "I wish I was free to love you. There are just so many things that you don't know about. So many things I want to tell you."

Castle smiled at her softly, "Then tell me. I'm all ears."

Kate shook her head softly, "I can't. It wouldn't be right to burden you with everything. It's not fair and.."

"Let me be the judge of that Kate."

She shook her head. She stood up and brushed the sand off of her pants. She had tears in her eyes when she whispered, "I can't. I'm sorry Castle. I..."

She turned and headed to the house. He could hear her cry softly as she went. He hoped that it wasn't because he had kissed her. It had just been an impulse. One that he had tried to control, but after three years of loving her, he was unable to resist. He wondered if that one simple act was the one thing that would drive her away from him for good.

He got up and walked back to the house. He noticed that she was in bed already and he sighed as he walked to his bedroom. Wondering if he had finally succeeded in driving her away from him forever...