And so being young and dipped in folly I fell in love with Melancholy. ~ Edgar Allen Poe
Chapter 5
He loves me, He loves me not, He loves me...
Solas' fingers dipped into thick, black paint as he painted the finishing touches of what happened at adamant. It wasn't accurate or very descriptive but it gave the ancient Elvhen something to focus on besides the feel of impending doom. He didn't get his reputation as the crafty and clever Fen'Harel by ignoring the signs. The Inquisitor had done something wrong. After many hours of carefully studying the amulet he found that it was not broken. Instead a ward blocked any magic from activating the artifact.
Which was bizarre! He knew the Inquisitor was strong but wards and barriers weren't her strong point. Normally he was in charge of setting up such spells and that was (with the exception to his knowledge of the fade) why he followed the Inquisitor nearly everywhere she went. However the Inquisitors reaction to the his failed attempt hadn't been shock but guilt. He lamented the thought but humans were more often than not predictable. Dangle something within their reach and they will claw their way to it regardless of the cost.
Ashamed, Fen'Harel was not amused by the hypocrisy of his own thoughts. He set his paints aside and quickly wiped his hands free of the thick substance suddenly not in the mood for art. After all so many of the events taking place were his fault and once again he hid "a wolf in sheep's clothing" amongst the Inquisitors loyal flock. Hiding while she fixed his mistakes and hopefully brought his orb back to him.
Everything had changed when he had awoke. Now darkspawn ran rampant in the bowels of Thedas. The Qun and it's oppression quietly waited to strike while human nobles in Orlais battered and abused Elven servants. The Dalish were no help but just another flock so fearful of anything besides their "ways" that they were slowly dying. It was foolish to hope that a darkspawn magister would assist him but he was desperate and all too eager to give the creature what it wanted if it would help him with his own goals.
Predictable.
It was a word that had been on his mind for days now. One he often even used for himself. Once again he had made a foolish and brash decision and now the people would pay for it and not just the Elvhen. It didn't take long for him to notice the Inquisitors marvelous spirit. She was a circle mage and yet she was in her own way wild. Pushing her own limits without giving the slightest hint to her end goals. The rebellious streak that caught the eye of the general and even Fen'harel's curious gaze. When she sealed the rifts he felt the whole world change as hope was restored to everyone, even himself.
And it was by a humans doing?
If some unlucky Elvhen had told him a few thousand years ago that he would be playing advisor to a human- that for a short while- wielded his power more effectively than himself. Well to put it bluntly, they'd be dead.
He admired, respected, and even felt a kinship with the Inquisitor. One that he hadn't felt with another person in many, many long years. It was what made this all the harder to understand. "Why or rather how?" The mage questioned to himself rubbing his scalp; his thoughts returning to the amulet. "What did this?"
The mage was stumped as he threw himself in his chair. His friends in the fade had helped very little and the scouts he questioned knew nothing. He tried to think of something he could do. If the amulet had been sabotaged than their was a chance that he could reverse it and help Cole properly. The spirit had been spending a lot of time around the Herald when it wasn't doing it's duty to help others. When the elf asked the young man replied it was for "protection."
It had crossed Solas' mind a few times that perhaps he was trying to talk the Inquisitor into doing what Solas refused. To bind compassion to her being but the elf knew what would happen. Emel didn't have a single cruel bone in her body and the idea of sacrificing someone for the ritual necessary was beyond her. As much as he hated to admit it. He was safe in knowing that like so many she was still predictable. Without much further thought, the dread wolf slept.
Quietly the demon watched through the veil. Flickering through memories of happiness, warmth, and friendship. It watched as Emel sat in the gardens of Skyhold cutting off blossoms of Crystal Grace and leaves from elfroot. The spirit stood his arms full as he waited patiently for his master.
This hadn't been what it wanted at all! All this mush was boring! As it flipped through memories of Cole telling bad knock-knock jokes and Emel making him flower crowns while they lay on her bed. Both the youths looked content and happy as they seemingly decided not to take advantage of their bond. Eeck!
Standing from it's throne in the fade the demon pondered what it should do. After all when the Templar had barely batted eye lashes to the mage the spirit reacted in jealousy. It wasn't necessarily wicked but only slightly amusing and yet. Could that be the key? After all the more people who took interest in his master the more reaction the demon could elicit in response.
After all desire had seen this woman before, walked in her footsteps, knew who she was. Her relationships, wants, and kinks were all as readable as fine print and the demon knew her well beyond the cover of her book. Contentedly the demon sat on it's perch as the cogs in it's head turned. The spirit of compassion didn't yet know desire and it would make him harder to manipulate than Emel.
"An easy challenge," the demon smirked as a knot of excitement formed in its stomach. "This will stir him up."
The day had gone by quickly and Emel had seen Cole off to the tavern. The mage smiled as she slowly walked to her room. Everyone had gotten back from the Exalted plains in one peace and surprisingly Emel had no issues with Solas at all. Whatever the mage knew it seemed he didn't have enough proof to confront them openly. So they went on their way as they encountered both Celene and Gespard's men. They found a wandering clan of semi-friendly dalish and even managed to recruit one of them. Cole hadn't seemed to change much after the binding except for the amount of attention Emel would receive from him. Especially in battle, whenever the mage found herself surrounded by enemies Cole was their and vice versa. The Iron Bull (who had been in their party at the time) couldn't help but acknowledge their brilliant teamwork as Solas watched the two wearily.
Emel was starting to like this idea of binding. She now saw the brilliant tool that was now at her disposal. Of course I don't mean Cole! Emel thought quickly. The bond was an amazing tool for the both of them but lately Emel began to worry about the power she wielded over the blonde rogue. Whenever Emel felt lonely Cole was there. If Emel felt hungry he would find her something to eat. If she felt tired he would usher her into bed like a child and make sure no one bothered her. It was strange and a part of her felt like it was too much.
Taking off her day clothes she put on her slip. Cleaning her teeth and braiding her long blond tresses for the night she crawled into bed her mind still turning with anxiety. A part of her knew it was coming. The inevitable moment when they would be found out or something bad would happen. A part of her wanted to summon the spirit now so he would crawl into bed and hold her. Only a few times during the nights when her anxiety was at its worst would he come and comfort her. After the woman would cry her eyes out over what they had done and what would become of them. Cole would sit and try to comfort her the best way he could. The spirit didn't understand what she had to be afraid of but knew why and that was comforting enough.
Cole made his way through the bar of the tavern where Varric sat. The dwarf sat idly with a pitcher of ale in one hand and a mob of eager patrons all listening to his tale of when Hawke battled the high dragon to reclaim her mine. The patrons eagerly awaited the climactic finish and Cole tried his best to get close enough to hear.
"Oh Hawke was pissed! Hawke, Fenris, Anders and I had been working on killing the dragon for what felt like hours. Apparently at one point Fenris and Hawke made a bet at who would take the finishing blow. This annoyed Anders of course who wouldn't have anything to do with it. I of course stayed back eagerly awaiting to see which of the two warriors would actually be able to kill the stupid thing. So when Fenris managed to deliver a lethal blow Hawke, who couldn't stand losing a bet, used her foot to buckle the back of Fenris' knee and cause him to fall backwards. The whole thing was rather embarrassing."
Varric paused for dramatic effect as he slowly sipped his ale. No one could see it but the dwarf smirked in his cup as the patrons seemed to physically react to his delay by getting a little closer.
"So what happened?" A young man asked. "The hero stole the kill? That doesn't seem very heroic."
As if on cue the dwarf set aside his drink and pointed to the lad. "Wrong! You see the dragon was injured but it still had enough fight to breath a blast fire in their direction. Hawke didn't take the killing blow because she was too busy pushing Fenris to the ground to keep him from being fried to a crisp."
"But Hawke did kill the dragon, right?" Cole hadn't noticed the Iron Bull as he sat with Krem on a crate away from the bar. The bull looked completely enraptured with the story. Cole knew it was because it was about dragons that the bull was so interested.
"Nope," Varric laughed as he grinned from ear to ear. "That's the best part."
"Don't tell me," the bartender blurted, "it was you."
Varric shook his head but kept grinning. "No, I'm not one for flashy heroism. The one who made the finishing blow was Anders. He was so smug afterwards that we didn't see Hawke or Fenris for weeks. Probably because Blondie went and scolded them like children afterwards."
"You mean that abomination who blew up the chantry." A man chimed in. He was in heavy armor and Cole could have sworn he was a Templar. "The one who killed the divine and set into affect the mage rebellion."
Everyone began to murmur and the dwarf paused. His usually cheery and confident demeanor changed as he looked at the floor. Cole could feel the guilt and sorrow that rolled off of him even though it was still so quiet.
"Yeah," Varric murmured. "That's Blondie."
"And wasn't Hawke the one that just let him run free after the disaster. The very reason why Kirkwall is now fighting against Starkhaven."
"Look," Varric said his eyes quickly catching the Templars as his voice became stern. "I don't know what the hell was going through Blondie's head when he blew up the damn chantry, alright. None of us saw it coming, especially Hawke!"
"Than why did she let him go!" The Templar retorted as he balled his hands into fists. Cole wondered if he shouldn't go over and steal the sword at his waist. Chargers started coming out of the word works as Bull stood sensing the same tension in the air. If Cole looked up he could see Sera with her bow out in case things got ugly.
"Yeah, she did. Everyone was shocked too but Hawke wasn't just going to sit their and judge a man she knew for ten sodding years. Abomination or otherwise."
The room grew quiet as the dwarf stood (though he was higher up on the stool) and looked to everyone.
"What Blondie did at Kirkwall hurt a lot of people. I'm not making excuses for him. I don't even know what was going through Hawkes head at the time either but Hawke was loyal. Even if it meant giving up glory she always had our backs... she-" Varric seemed to deflate as he waved everyone off.
Emel walks through the door of Skyhold and I can feel it. Something in the air that tells me something is wrong. "Where's Hawke?" I ask, trying to keep my voice from cracking, splintering, tearing at the seams, like I am. "She's gone Varric. I'm so sorry." The Inquisitor hangs her head just like everyone else in the room, and just like that another story ends.
Cole watched as his friend shooed everyone away too tired to talk about his deceased friend anymore. Sera began to yell at everyone from the second floor as she began throwing pillows and shoes at everyones head telling them to "piss off" and "go to bed already you dits!" The Bull went over to his usual seat at the back of the tavern as Krem sat with him drinking in silence. The spirit sat beside the dwarf at the bar until the tension eased up.
"So how's it going, kid? Did Solas figure out what was wrong with the amulet?"
"No," Cole replied as he played with the woods grain at the bar. Looking at all the rings and listening to their stories.
"Well, have you figured out what you want to do for the Inquisitor."
Cole perked up as he remembered one of his last talks with the Dwarf before the Exalted plains. After Emel had stormed off after their fight, the one before they binded, Cole had gone to Varric for advise. The spirit didn't like to see Emel upset and Varric chuckled.
"You need to do something nice. Remind her that your still friends." The dwarf told him and Cole had been brainstorming.
"I think I have an idea." Cole said as he slightly leaned over to the dwarf and told him his idea.
Burning.
Not like fire but just as intense. Emel felt sweat pour down her brow as she awoke with her covers thrown off and hair loose from it's braid. Her shift during the night had rose over her legs and halfway up her stomach exposing her undergarments to the world. The cool air felt good as it hit her legs but the pulsating between them couldn't be sated with a light breeze.
The young mage had only experienced this a few times but it was in her late teens. "Hormones" one of the elder mages said when she explained the problem red faced and embarrassed. "Everyone experiences it."
But this time it hurt and she could feel her body begin to shake uncontrollably. Without any thought her hands roamed to her legs as they trembled. Using butterfly touches she rubbed his inner thighs as a moan escaped her throat.
Varric laughed but Cole knew by the look on Varrics face that he felt pride in the young man. "That's good, kid. I'm not sure that it reads friendship but if you feel like that's what you want to do, then go ahead. I kind of wish I had thought of something like that when I was your age but for different reasons."
Cole couldn't help the small smile that crept on his face. If Varric approved than the spirit knew he would have to put his plan into action. Varric downed the rest of his pint and called for another one and that's when it hit the young man. Like a bolt of lightening Cole felt a sharp current of electricity strike through his being and face dived onto the bar. The drunk woman next to him squealed as he knocked over her bottle of wine. It was as though his whole body crumpled under the weight of some new sensation that made his mouth dry and his head foggy.
Inching her shift a little higher Emel began to explore the plains of her stomach. Her breath quickened but it was deeper and she could feel her back arch as her palms applied pressure over her lower abdomen. Everything was sensitive and she could feel herself getting wet from her own attention. Slowly she rubbed her thighs together trying to get the friction she had lost as she slipped her night shift further up her person.
"You okay, kid?" Varric asked as he watched the spirit who was currently smacking his open palm on the table. His expression reminded Varric of someone who had too much Antivan ice and was experiencing some horrible brain freeze.
Cole didn't answer instead he face planted once again into the bar. He let out a strangled whine and Varric didn't know what to do.
"Should I go get Solas?" The dwarf asked more to himself but Cole abruptly stood ramrod straight and grabbed Varric by the shoulder.
"No, I- no I'm sorry. I just need to leave." Quickly the spirit ran from the tavern nearly knocking over a drunk patron in his haste.
Emel could still feel the haze of sleep over her as she fondled her right breast. She pinched the tender bud so hard it would surely be purple by morning but right now it was ecstasy. This wasn't like those self-conscious, hormonal nights in the circle. This was something that made her head spin and left her feeling shameless. She hadn't even gotten to the best part yet and she was experiencing unimaginable pleasure. The mage rolled over, her hand never leaving her breast, her thighs never stopped rubbing. Slowly she began to suck her own fingers getting lost in the many different feelings as her tongue rolled over her own digits.
Cole had barely made it up the stone steps that led it to the great hall. His mind was in a fog but he knew that despite what he was feeling Emel was calling him. His legs were weak and shaking and his breathing was labored. The blonde male also felt the strange need to make noises that he knew would sound embarrassing. His pants were also feeling too tight.
He quickly scrambled through the hall with no one there to notice but two bickering servants who were too busy to care. Cole quickly opened the door to the Inquisitors private chambers and marched up the stairs. That was where he found her writhing in her bed sheets. It didn't faze the young man as he quietly made his way over to her bed trying not to startle her and watched.
Her blonde hair was flowing around her head in a loose from it's braid and her skirt was hiked up over her breasts. It wasn't the first time he had seen this nor had he ever been so captivated by it. Her eyed were closed and she didn't seem to sense him until he slowly began to crawl onto her bed. Just like he feared she seemed startled and quickly stopped her frenzied movements.
"No, don't stop." Cole murmured his voice trembling a bit. "Keep going."
The look in Emels eyes was hazy at best and coated with something he didn't recognize. No one had ever looked at him like that before he found himself drawn in as she began to tease her self again and the world crashing sensations returned. He knew what this was, or rather, what she was doing to herself. Though he never felt the need to act on such compulsions he knew that it brought pleasure. Suddenly he began wracking his brain for something he could do besides just watching.
Gently he laid his hat beside the bed and the spirit hovered over the hormonal woman as he watched on hands and knees. Slowly he cupped Emel's face and placed his lips on hers like he had seen others do before. His gentleness was returned with a ferocity that blew his breath away as she crushed their lips together moaning against his mouth. The sound alone caused his hips to buck though he wasn't sure why and felt his weight collapse on top of the smaller woman. His body fit perfectly against her as she began to grind against him. He kept his head up by using his elbows as leverage while she began to run her fingers through his hair.
Emel pulled away for only a moment to tell Cole to part his lips before he felt something slick enter his mouth. Before the spirit could determine whether he liked it or not he was brought closer as the kiss deepened and ultimately he decided he liked it very much. It seemed the more contact he came into with the mage, the stronger the feelings became and right now he was a parched man drowning in a river. He knew he needed to come up for air but the water felt so good he didn't mind drowning.
He pulled away only because he knew Emel needed to breath and began attacking her neck. Biting and licking at the flesh he saw and reveling in the little pulses of pleasure the two seemed to share. Everything he did to her he felt and he hoped he was reciprocating it to her as well. Slwoly he began grinding his hips as his pants continued to tightened painfully. The mewling noises she made in his ear egged him on as he felt her hands try to tug his shirt up. Quickly he pulled back and undid the buckle knowing that what she wanted was being denied by the leather belt around his waist. Emel sat up right throwing her shift over he head and tossing it aside before helping Cole out of his patchwork shirt. He was just as she imagined thin and yet muscular. She could see the slight ribs as he breathed in and out but the rest of him was built with lean muscle. Broad shoulders were speckled with a few light freckles and his arms were corded with strong, lean muscle as well. Her hands brushed over his broad shoulders to his chest and down his flat stomach.
Slowly she began to kiss down the same trail as her hands and Cole was left watching with wide eyes. "What are you doing?" He asked breathlessly as she paid extra attention to one of his nipples. She began to undue the ties of his pants as she smirked against his skin.
"Loving you." She replied sweetly kissing his stomach before her head went lower.
Solas woke late into the night. For whatever purpose he was ripped out of the fade. He just knew something wasn't right even more so than it had been for weeks. Slowly he willed his body to rise and made his way into the great hall. Everyone had gone to sleep so the large space was empty but he could hear something. He had exceptionally good hearing and as he made his way to the Inquisitors "throne" he began to hear it a little better. The door that led to the hallway where her chamber door was lay wide open.
Concerned he traveled the narrow passage and the sounds continued to get louder.
Was that screaming?
The Eleven mage ran to the Inquisitors room and ran through the door that lid ajar but stopped before he reached the top of the stairs. Then he quickly slid down them as he saw- well why the Inquisitor had been yelling so loudly. Embarrassed and red faced the mage cursed himself for his stupidity. Another mess he had gotten himself into because he had acted so hastily. If he was lucky he could make his way out without anyone being the wiser and make himself forget this whole ridiculous endeavor. As he began to creep down the stairs when he began to hear a voice aside from the Inquisitors that he recognized all too well.
The sure footed elf crept back up the stairs and looked through the railings and went pale with what he saw. The two "lovers" were caught up in an embrace both sitting up while the Inquisitor rode the mans lap. Hissing sounds and cries of ecstasy escaped the blonde woman's mouth as her hair fell down her back in golden colored waves. The man, or should Solas call him what he really was, spirit remained plastered to the woman as he bit and sucked at the flesh of her neck.
Cole! Solas' head was reeling from shock as he watched the two fornicating like wild animals. He knew he should have left then and there but he continued to watch completely astonished at the actions of the two. It wasn't until a pair of blue eyes found him that Solas made any move to leave. Cole had been staring right at him watching the elf but did not cease as he drove himself further into the Inquisitor.
The elf threw himself against the opposite wall and ran from the room without even bothering to close the door. He hastily ran across the hall and to his personal quarters and slammed the door stirring the Leliana's birds. Quickly he dumped all the water from the cold pitcher in his room into the wash basin and threw his head in. His face felt like it could melt from the heat and he didn't emerge until he needed air.
Suddenly it seemed his problems were on a whole other level than that stupid Rivaini Talisman.
A/N: Holy crap! What you doin' Solas? Spying on the young people like dat! Are you some kind of pervert. Lol. Or could this all be the doing of the demon! DUNDUNDUNDUN! You could tell me your opinions. Lol. just leave a review and tell me what you thought of this chapter or what you think is going to happen next.
SHOUT OUT!
Guest: Aw, I'm glad you liked it and yes you cheeky devil. I thought the same thing about combat to... and some other things, lol.
Birdy Main: Good because especially after this chapter the last thing I want is for you to feel like we are molesting kidz up in here. XD
NiffNaff: David Gaider says that Cole understands he just doesn't get the idea of the compulsion. He feels what everyone else feels and pleasure is in it's own way a selfish act. Cole is selfless and doesn't need that sort of intimacy it's just strange to him. He even describes it to Solas and asks why a spirit would ever want to, in the game. Solas asks him if he ever felt the desire to. Cole says no. Hence why Imshael calls him a virgin. Lol. Spirits can, in higher forms, experience those feelings of pleasure but only if it interests them.
Lady Stoic: You can put a link out for my story and thank you. I was a little high when I replied to you. I hurt my back very badly this weekend and he gave me some strong pain killers so I was a little loopy. God bless and keep up with "Growing Pains" on AO3! Lol.
Read and Review! I am throwing an attention whore party in here and I have to get some attentions! Lol.