I get down on my knees and bow as Ukitake walks onto stage and plops down into one of the comfy recliner chairs I have set out for him. I brandish no bungee cord.
"W-What the hell?" Ichigo shrieked in outrage. "Why don't we get that kind of treatment?"
"Because Ukitake's sweet and kind, and you are anything but," I say, and turn my puppy dog eyes onto the 13th Division captain.
"Hello," he says sheepishly, and waves awkwardly to the audience he has. I swoon.
"CAPTAIN! CAPTAIN!" Kiyone and Sentaro bellow from amongst the crowd, jumping up and down and gesturing about frenetically. "WE BID YOU ALL THE CANDY YOU WANT!"
"AND A FREE LIFETIME OF SHOULDER MASSAGES!" Sentaro added.
Ukitake chuckled. "Um, okay. I'll see about it." Over in the corner, Shirosaki begins to grumble, agitated that all the publicity is being directed elsewhere.
DeviantHollow23: *huffs* "You!" *points finger at you*
My eyes widen comically. "What did I do?" I say innocently.
"Your doin' this on purpose so I'll drag my tired ass outta bed an' show up again!"
"That's the gist of it."
"Whitey should have been mind already!" *tugs out hair*
At ease now, Shirosaki just sits back as much as is possible in his bound state and grins. "'Whitey'?" he mumbles, amused and intrigued.
"But fine fine..." *sighs* we'll do it your way...First off, I back off for ownership of Ichi. I agree that Anime-kisses...or whoever that was...should have him. An' IF by chance she's doesn't give him what it is he's requestin', which I doubt, then I will! Full room with a view an' whatever else it was he wanted." *grins*
"Now, You!" *turns toward Hollow* Shirosaki leans back in his chair, acting mock surprised.
"Now that I know what ya REALLY want..." *turns around to write quickly on a piece of paper before turning back around an' stompin' up to the Hollow*
"Oh, is that right?" Shirosaki inquires. "Cuz I really don't think you do. Maybe..." He grins crazily as DeviantHollow23 approaches him.
"Read!" *shoves paper in front of his face* Shirosaki looks at her skeptically and then leisurely sits up and inclines his head, giving the paper a quick scan. His eyes coldly glinted suddenly and his lips split in an insane smile as his gaze slid over to Ichigo, who gulped fearfully.
"Ah? Ya like that?" *grins before flat-linin' the grin* "Well, end this nonsense already an' come home with me already!" I get curious and creep over to see what was written just as DeviantHollow23 lights the paper on fire. I slump dejectedly.
"Calm down, Kevvy." She drops the paper as it goes up in smoke and turns into ash.
"I've sent ya a PM of what was written so that some people don't end up changin' or retractin' their offers. Can't have that now, can we?" *snickers towards the Hollow before yawnin'*
"I'll be over there when ya need me again..." *points towards a couch as she mutters*
"Might as well stick around an' sleep here if I keep gettin' called back again."
I grab a handful of confetti and toss it everywhere just as Shirosaki says, "You've gotta deal."
The bungee cord loosens and Shirosaki stands up and stretches.
"GONGRATS TO DEVIANTHOLLOW23! YOU'VE CLAIMED OWNERSHIP OF HOLLOW ICHI!" I squeal.
I guide the Hollow backstage to wait until DeviantHollow23 wakes up from her nap and then dash back, sneakers skidding on the pristine floor boards.
Storygirl11: "I'm not giving up! (coz I seriously need someone to clean my room). I'll bid...a room with a window, Chinese food of all sorts (don't know how to make Japanese food) and my magic mushroom!"
"A MAGIC MUSHROOM?" Ichigo howled.
"Maybe it's the kind of shrooms that get you high and that's what she means by 'magical'," I say.
"I'm too young! That's illegal!" he told me. I shrug my shoulders.
Mangareader125: "On second thought, I retract my bid for Ichigo (to Kevvy Talks: If I wanted a complainer I would have gone for Grimmjow when he goes up on the chopping block).
"Look," Ichigo spoke up, trying as hard as possible to sit up straight in his chair, "I'm not complaining. I seriously don't wanna hurt anyone's feelings. I just didn't ask for this and all I wanna do is get back home before my dad has a freakin' fit."
"Your dad is going on auction, too," I point out.
"Yeah, well..." Ichigo trails off and huffs.
Hotaru-Naichingeru: "JUSHIRO, I OFFER YOU THE MAYO CLINIC, WHO WILL BE ABLE TO RESEARCH AND GIVE MUCH BETTER MEDICINE FOR YOU! (You can also get a pie. :) )"
"Oh," Ukitake says, looking thoughtful, and clasps his hands together and places them in his lap. "That's very kind of you. Thank you. I'll take it into consideration."
Anime-kisses: "Ichigo, I'll give you a window that changes the scenery every hour if that's what you want!"
Feeling guilty now, Ichigo looked away.
"Now, for Ukitake. First off, I absolutely adore you, Jushiro, and I just want the best for you."
Ukitake smiles, flattered.
"I offer you all the candy you want; German, American, French, Japanese, Italian, etc, so you can give it to Toshiro and anyone else you want (I'll even buy Toshiro or work out a play-date with whoever buys him). I'll buy you all the ohagi you want. I have also gotten you a garden which is full of various plants, trees, has a stream, cute little bridges, and is just an overall peaceful place (There are plenty of bonsai trees for you to trim). It is also located somewhere Kiyone and Sentaro will never be able to get (but they'll know your safe) and Shunsui can come and go as he pleases. I think that's all for now but I hope you like it." :D
Ukitake is speechless now.
Alchemistofpeace: "ARGPOMFUGWBDUCBUUKITAKE! Now that that's over with, I BID THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE PLUS PROTECTION AGAINST GLOMPING FANGIRLS! You also have protection against your third seats (admit it, they're annoying). That glomping thing also counts for me. All I will do is give you gentle hugs. Now, what do you want: A crazy fangirl who will rape you or me, a fangirl who will give you whatever you want?"
Ukitake composes himself and sits up a little straighter. "I don't know what I would do with the entire universe," he says softly. "But I wouldn't mind a hug." He smiles and stands up to go over and glomp Alchemistofpeace.
I snatch up some papers from one of my assistants and look them over.
reven lord of darkness: "I offer you 100,000 boxes of chocolates and 100 glasses of milk for Ichigo. Same for Senna if you get around to her."
Ichigo blinks. "That's...a lot of chocolate," he says blankly, "and alot of milk."
BloodRedDeathGod: "I bet a cure for your TB and freedom to come and go as you please along with free meals and all the years of youth lost cuz of TB for Jushiro!"
Ukitake climbs back onstage after he's gotten done hugging the majority of the audience and waves to BloodRedDeathGod. "Thank you!"
"And that's all, folks!" I say, and give a flashy salute to everyone.
To be continued...
Congratulations to DeviantHollow23 for winning Shirosaki this chapter! Your name will now be posted to my profile along with the character you claimed. For all those who bid and will bid on Ukitake, your offers are being considered. Because all of them were so great, no one is at the top of the list for him. Storygirl11, due to your unyeilding persistence, Ichigo is holding off and your bid is being considered with the upmost thought. For now, it seems Anime-kisses has a rival, therefore she will regrettably not be taking Ichi home right now. As for the rest of you readers, keep on submitting your reviews. Storygirl11, Ichigo wants to know specifically how magic this mushroom is. lol. :) Have fun, everybody!