"So, care to fill me in?" McCoy asked while he poked and prodded his captain the old fashioned way.
"We got your ah... rather unorthodox call. Spock made it over first, of course, but they already had you slung over their shoulders like a sack of potatoes, so he couldn't fire. Stun setting doesn't work on them, by the way. Just shrug it off. Ouch! What are you doing Bones?"
"Checkin' for broken ribs. I think you've got one. Maybe two, but you're not coughing up blood – yet – so you should be fine until we get you back to sickbay."
"Good to hear. Chekov, you alright?"
"Aye, Keptin."
"Good. So, he came back to report, we regrouped. I attempted to ah... open negotiations?"
"I am going to assume that did not go well, considering you're down here with us."
"Yes, well, I'd hoped that Parson would be with you. I figured, worse came to worse, if I kept my communicator with me that at least Scotty could beam us back up."
McCoy looked him up and down.
"Don't see it on you. Please don't tell me you swallowed it or something equally disturbing."
Jim's sheepish smile turned McCoy's stomach.
"Sorry Bones, I didn't think that quick. They've got mine too. Left my phaser with the team, at least. Yours?"
"Didn't bring one," McCoy answered.
"Dropped mine in the high grass when we were captured," Chekov replied at the same time.
"Good. Now we just need to work our way out and we'll be golden."
"Easy enough for you, I'm sure Captain." McCoy smirked at his friend.
"Well, Bones, it wouldn't be the first time. So, any ideas?"
"When I hoisted the kid up on my shoulders he got plucked up pretty quick."
"Yeah, it's flat up there. We were right I the middle of an argument about your release when they saw his head come up. Doubt we'll be able to pull that one again. Got a spoon?"
"Ha. No. And considering all the shale, or the local equivalent, around here, last thing I want to do is start digging to find myself picking the one direction that leads to underground boulders. Where would we dig to, anyway?"
"Ze beach?"
"Ah, that beach Jim. Half an hour ago, I was thinking this would be a good R 'n R planet."
"Half an hour? Boy you did take a good one to the head. We've been here three hours already. It's going to be sun down soon."
"Wonderful." He sighed and let himself flop back down in the dirt. Three hours. That means in less than two, I should be up doing my babysitting duties, and I was too chickenshit to even admit that I was going planetside.
"Uhura's keeping an eye on things, Bones. We'll get you back up to your patient soon enough."
"Next possible planet? I'm letting you and the hobgoblin come down on your own. I'm going to stay in my nice, safe, climate controlled sickbay."
"Maybe next time you wait until you get radio signal back," Chekov helpfully suggested. "That vay none of us stuck in deep pit."
"An excellent suggestion Mr. Chekov," Jim replied. The wattage on his smile turned down a bit after he glanced up at the sky again.
"So, what was Plan B?"
"I think that one was, 'Have Parson and Kelly circle around for a better look.' We then went on to Plan C, 'Have security personnel captured by unknown aliens far from Federation space.' And of course there's plan D, 'Get all high ranking officers captured in attempts to save lower ranking crew.' No offense, Mr. Chekov."
"None taken."
"You've still got one or two on the loose," McCoy cheered. He let his head flop back onto the dirt behind him. "But give it a day or two, and then... hello there."
The eye peering over the edge retracted suddenly.
The doctor held up a hand to stop the others from verbally reacting. He glanced over at Jim. Think you can work your charming magic?
A ill look on Jim's face told the doctor he knew exactly what McCoy was thinking.
"I am not-"
McCoy shushed him.
"Hello up there," McCoy tried again.
The top of the head ducked farther away, before peeking back over the edge.
"Hello."
The doctor smiled as warmly as he could.
"My name is Leonard, what's yours?"
"Fanna. What about you, and you?"
"I'm Jim, and this is Pavel. It's nice to meet you, Fanna."
"Leonard, Jim, Pabel," Fanna repeated, pointing to each in turn. They all nodded. She's close enough anyway. "Daddy says I should be watching you."
"Oh?"
"I'm supposed to scream if you try to climb out again."
"That makes sense."
"How did you climb out? You're so tiny. What are you? Are you babies or something? How big will you get? What happened to your legs? You don't have any horns. You must be babies. Where's your Daddy?"
A child? Jim mouthed to McCoy, who shrugged.
"My friend climbed on my shoulders," the doctor answered honestly, for lack of better ideas. "We're adults; we're supposed to be this size. And this is the usual number of legs, and arms, for our species."
"You look weird."
"I suppose we do, don't we."
"Why are you here? Where do you come from?"
"We're from very, very far away. One of our friends got lost, so we've been looking for him. Maybe you've seen him? He is... bright red. Like this color," Jim answered, poking at a bit of blood welled up at his temple.
"Daddy says your a liar. Demons who spin falsehoods. He says you're the demons who steal children away at night."
"Demons that steal children?"
Fanna nodded, her little tusk buds tapping the ground in her excitement. She flinched and one of her hands covered the tip of it.
"Ow."
"Do you think we can talk to your Daddy, Fanna dear?"
"He is busy. Elders trying to decide if they should cook and eat you, or skin you and make talismans to keep away other demons."
"Great."
She ducked her head again.
"Your people eat meat?" McCoy asked. Guess my earlier assumptions were wrong.
"I've never eaten meat," Fanna replied, her voice gone to a whisper. "It is a forbidden thing."
"Oh? But why would they eat us then?"
"If we eat demon flesh, then maybe we get their strength and knowledge."
"Vat strength? Dey overtook us before we could do a damn ting."
"How long have demons been stealing children? How many have been taken?"
The girl thought a while, counting off fingers first on her smaller, secondary hands before moving up to her larger ones.
"This many," she decided, holding up three sets of five fingers and two fingers up on the last one.
"That many, huh? That's a lot of children."
She nodded, tucking her face back down so only her eyes showed.
"You're not the children stealing demons," she whispered.
"Nope, we are not. But how do you know that?"
"I stayed up late... a couple times. I saw... things go into homes. You're too small."
Jim nodded, grinning ear to ear.
"Yes, I believe we are. I don't think I could pick you up, even with the help of these two big, strong men at my side."
Chekov looked ready to argue, but McCoy put a hand on his shoulder. Let the man work, you idiot. James T. Kirk can charm women like the Pied Piper... no matter the age or species.
Ya know, I think I should suggest Spock write a study on him. Imagine the Vulcan scandal with that!
"No, you are too small."
"You know, staying up late to see what the demons look like, is a pretty brave thing. I betcha they never show up in day time, only at night when they're extra scary. And they do sound very big and scary too! To be able to steal so many away from their homes."
She nodded. A little chittering purr tinkled over the edge of their pit. That's it man. A few more compliments and we'll be in the home stretch.
"A big brave girl like you should have no problem telling her father what those demons actually looked like. And do you know why?"
"No, why?"
"Because if the adults do eat us, not only will they be eating forbidden flesh – blegh! – but everyone will think the demons are defeated! And you know they won't be. No one will be staying up to guard the families, will they? That'll be a bad thing, won't it?"
"Very bad," she agreed.
"Besides," Jim said, starting to stretch for ideas. "If they eat us, we won't be able to fight the bad demons!"
"Bad demons?"
"Of course. The bad demons show up at night and steal children away. They are big, and scary, aren't they? We show up during the day, we are little, and not scary at all, are we? We're here to help fight off these bad night demons."
"-Jim," McCoy growled. "We can't interfere."
"Oh come on, Bones. With our scanners, it'll be a few minutes to see what's up."
McCoy sighed and let the master do his work.
"So, what do you say, Fanna? Can you get your dad for us? So we can tell him why we're here? That we aren't like the big, scary demons you've seen at night?"
She glanced over her shoulder.
"They're far away. I'm supposed to stay and make sure you don't climb out."
"Pinky promise. We won't try to escape while you go get your dad, okay?"
"Pinky promise?"
Jim reached up his hand, little finger extended. "It's our most solemn oath. If I'm lying, you get to bite my finger off."
"Jim!"
"Keptin!"
Kirk rolled his eyes. "You've got to stick your pinky out like this too, thatta girl." He hooked his little finger around hers and gave it a little shake. "That means you promise to get your dad, and I promise to stay here until you get back."
Fanna stared at her little finger in horror. "If I don't?"
"I get to bite your finger off."
She let out a little eep! and ran off to, hopefully, get an adult.
"That's morbid Keptin."
"As long as it gets the job done."
"Yahuh," McCoy shook his head at his friend. "And here I thought you had a god-given-gift with all members of the female species. Now I know your secret. You threaten to bite body parts off."
With a sigh, he let his head fall back to the cool dirt again. Damn. I feel a serious migraine coming on.