Author's note: I finished my project early, yay! Anyway, I thought after the Somalia talk the night wasn't over yet... so I hope you enjoy the chapter.

Tony slipped out of the bedroom just before 3am. He went to get a drink when he noticed Gibbs wide awake and watching True Grit. "Don't you sleep, boss?"

"I dozed a bit," Gibbs nodded to Tony and gestured for him to join him in the living room. "This is one of the remakes that was worth it."

"Yeah," Tony said absently.

"You two OK?" Gibbs asked.

"Yes," Tony took a seat across from Gibbs on one of the club chairs. "Just restless tonight."

"We'll figure this out, Tony," Gibbs assured.

"I know," Tony said as he took a sip of scotch. "Ziva told me about Ari tonight."

"I'm glad," Gibbs gave Tony a half-smile. "Did she tell you about South America?"

"Some," Tony leaned forward with the scotch in hand. "I asked her to let me in." He said slowly. "I asked her to bear everything to me."

"Do you regret asking her?" Gibbs asked with trepidation.

"No," Tony shook his head. "I regret not letting her in earlier. I was confused after Jeanne and especially after what happened," Tony clenched his jaw, "with Rivkin." He stared out the window, quiet for a long moment. "Why didn't I let Ziva in sooner? I think back and I don't know what I was afraid of."

"Losing her," Gibbs stated. "What we do isn't easy...Jeanne was easy. She wasn't putting her life on the line every day. You could count on going home to her. But in the end, Tony, she was not the one for you."

"There is only one for me and she is a crazy ninja ex-Mossad chick," Tony smiled then leaned back in the chair. "Did you know that her father had her start her IDF service at 16? At 17 she was serving in the IDF, going to college and training with Mossad."

"I thought IDF service in Israel started at 18?" Gibbs asked.

"Eli got her special permission to start service at 16," Tony's jaw clenched. "He trained her hard. She graduated college at 20. Eli had picked all her courses. She let him drive her because she wanted to be Mossad to avenge Tali."

"We knew her life was not easy, Tony," Gibbs looked directly at Tony, "but she survived. That is what counts."

"She buries everything," Tony swallowed, "she does it so well."

"Let her bury it," Gibbs nodded. "She doesn't want to live in the darkness and I admire that. Let her be happy. She loves you so much, Tony."

Tony looked over at Gibbs - she doesn't want to live in the darkness. With a smile, Tony realized that was true. She buried everything, pushed it away because she didn't want to give it importance. Especially the darkest moments of her life. All this time he thought she had to get it out - talk about the pain and deal with it head on. But he was wrong - she even told him but he didn't see it. She never let that darkness in - she truly did not dwell on it. That was her strength, that was why she still had joy in her eyes. All she'd been through would have broken anyone else; but Ziva? Stubborn, obstinate Ziva? She simply wouldn't let it break her so she buried it. Tony understood that was good - that was actually beautiful. It meant through everything she lived with hope that there would be joy to be had.

When Tony looked up he noticed Gibbs staring at him, "You ok?"

Tony stood and nodded, "I really am. Thank you. Get some sleep ok." He left Gibbs in the living room and went to the bedroom closing the door behind him.

Ziva was turned away from him as he crawled back into bed gently. He moved closer to her and felt her intake of breath as he wrapped his arm around her waist. Wait, she wasn't sleeping.

"Ziva," he whispered, "Are you ok? Are you in pain?" Tony asked as he started to turn her in his arms.

Ziva's hands went to her cheeks immediately and he realized she was wiping away tears.

"Baby," Tony murmured. "Is it your back again? Let's go to the hospital."

"No," she swallowed. "I am fine. Just...tired. Go back to sleep, Tony."

"You are not fine," Tony turned her to face him completely. He looked at her for a long moment and saw the tears glistening in her eyes. He lowered his cheek to her damp one and held her close; reminding her of that last night they had together before she left all those months ago.

Ziva cried outwardly and he knew she remembered.

"I love you," Tony whispered in her ear.

Through her tears Ziva asked, "Even now that you know...I am damaged goods?"

"Don't say that," he pulled back and looked at her, "That is not true."

"Yes it is," she cried. "I wish I had not told you. I wish you did not know. I wish you could see me just as that fellow agent. I wish… I could be an uncomplicated woman for you."

"I would not love an uncomplicated woman," he smiled at her, "I love, Ziva. All the pain, all the struggle, all the absolutely ridiculous moments of your life...I love. Because they are you." Tony leaned in and kissed her softly, "There is nothing damaged about you. There is only one kick-ass ninja that I can't get enough of."

Ziva looked up at him with big eyes and he saw it; the hope she carried that there would be joy ahead. He was lost in that hope...in her. He kissed her, slowly, tenderly at first then it deepened. He drank her in, covered her and they made love. When Tony climaxed he looked into her eyes and she into his; and she smiled at him and he knew she understood how much he loved her. They always knew how to communicate with their eyes.

Don't forget to let me know if you enjoyed the chapter!