Hello! I hope you enjoy this chapter and don't forget to review! I'm really stressed out with finals and stuff, but I'll do my best to update in a timely manner nonetheless.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia Axis Powers

Age Fourteen

New Home

A little over a year ago, back when he was thirteen, Ludwig had called his older brother in tears over the phone, reading out the note once again in shaky German. Gilbert hadn't said much, but a few hours later Ludwig had opened the door to find Gilbert standing there, suitcase in hand.

They ended up moving shortly after that, just the two of them. An apartment close to Ludwig's future high school, where the rent was cheap. Gilbert, at the age of nineteen, became his younger brother's legal guardian. He claimed it was what any big brother who was as awesome as he was would do, but Ludwig knew that wasn't true.

Gilbert transferred out of his dream college upstate to a small community college down the road, where he took part-time classes. The albino teen managed to get a job, and took what classes in the morning as he spent most of his afternoons and evenings working so he could provide for the two of them.

Back then, Ludwig had been bitter and barely spoke. His mother left because of him, he understood that, but she shouldn't have taken it out on Gilbert too. Didn't she think about his this would affect her other son? Didn't she think at all? It had been selfish of her. To leave without a trace, without a form of contact. She had abandoned her sons, and Ludwig couldn't help but wonder what would have happened to him if Gilbert hadn't been there. What would he have done then?

It hurt Ludwig to know she left, but he couldn't even imagine how Gilbert felt about it. He was older, he got more time to bond with their mother. And she had left because of Ludwig. Did Gilbert resent him for that? He wouldn't blame Gilbert if he did. After all, he had so many reasons to hate Ludwig. Their mother and father leaving, having to move from their childhood home. And of course, the fact that Gilbert could no longer attend his dream college.

Ludwig was officially the worst younger brother to ever exist.

Regardless, the blond was now fourteen and a freshman in high school. Classes were stressful, but simple. Walking out of his small bedroom, he grabbed a breakfast bar from the box on the counter.

"Bruder, are you up?" Gilbert called from the living room. "Grab me one of those granola bar thingies."

Doing as told, Ludwig fished another out of the box before heading to the living room, watching as his brother tied his shoe and shoved on his coat in a hurry. Stretching out his hand, he offered the snack, which Gilbert hastily grabbed and unwrapped before shoving it in his mouth.

"I got one class today, engineering." The twenty-year-old man said with his mouth full, chewing between words. "Then I gotta go straight to work. Don't wait up, okay? The awesome me will see you later."

Ludwig nodded. "Alright, good luck. Don't forget to eat your lunch." He reminded, hoping his brother had grabbed it from the fridge.

Ever since Gilbert had gotten the miserable job, Ludwig had begun preparing lunch for the red-eyed boy. Shortly after they moved, it had been obvious that Gilbert hadn't been eating as much as he used to, and after some persuasion, Ludwig managed to convince Gilbert to let him make lunch for him daily.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. See ya later, West." Gilbert said, rolling his eyes before leaving, closing the door as he left.

Ludwig walked back to his bedroom, grabbing his backpack before finishing his small granola bar and stuffing on his shoes. With a sigh, he left the apartment, locking the door behind him.

As soon as he got to class, he slumped in his chair before pulling out the necessary binders and materials. Earth Science was never the most enjoyable class in his opinion, and with the grouchy teacher who could never seem to properly organize an assignment, it was not the best way to start off the morning.

The short and stout balding man he called a teacher growled at some of the students passing by, a seemingly friendly smile on his face. Of course, every student who actually took the class knew otherwise.

"Hey, freak." A boy in basketball shorts said, sneering down at Ludwig from where he stood in front of the blond's desk. "What're you doin' here?"

"Attending class, what does it look like?"

"Why the hell is a freak like you allowed in the school? Shouldn't you be locked up somewhere?" The boy- Todd, asked rhetorically. "Or are you only here so you don't have to be in that shitty ass apartment you live in?"

He tried not to become hurt by Todd's words, and his eyebrows scrunched in irritation. Gilbert did his best for them, it wasn't his fault they could only afford so much. It may not be the classiest apartment, but it put a roof over their heads.

"How did you know where I live? Are you stalking me?" Ludwig asked, bored, as he pulled out his pencil.

Todd grimaced, scrunching his nose like he smelled a rotting corpse. "No, fag, as much as you would like that. I was driving home and I saw you."

Fag. What an ugly term. Not looking up at the other boy, Ludwig hoped the bell would ring already. He went through this confrontation everyday, and he had to admit it was getting dull. Hurtful nonetheless, but still dull.

"Well, freak, did ya know that no one wants you here? Go back to Germany or something. Just go away already."

And then, the shrill bell rung, and Todd slinked off to his seat in the back of the room, cronies following dutifully behind him.

The classes went by quickly enough, and after spending lunch alone as he always did, Ludwig was in his World Civilizations class by the time the teacher called him aside after talking in hushed tones on the phone.

"Ludwig." He began, scratching at his brown beard. "Mr. Atkins wants you to go to the guidance office. Pack up your bag and go, class is almost over. Read pages 90 to 95 in your textbook tonight, and have a nice weekend."

The German boy nodded, grabbing his belongings and ignoring the whispered muttering from the other students as he walked out the door. It was always like this, whenever he got caller to the guidance office. Peers would mumble and mutter amongst themselves, spreading rumors to their friend about why they thought Ludwig was going to see Mr. Atkins.

Some said it was for grief counseling, others said it was to work on anger issues. Some kids even went as far to say it was because they were doing scientific experiments on him to figure out why he was wordless. Either way, the entire student body agreed on one thing: that Ludwig was a freak.

Only weirdos and losers with mental problems went to see Mr. Atkins, everybody knew that. Jenny Moore had an eating disorder and Greg Warner tried to kill himself. Only freaks saw Mr. Atkins. But then again, he was a freak, wasn't he?

Knocking on the door, Ludwig heard the soft answer from Caleb Atkins as he pushed open the door. This happened monthly. Mr. Atkins went from school to school, helping kids that he deemed 'unsafe', and he always made sure to check in on Ludwig.

They had talked a few times, although Ludwig would never divulge any actual information, they both knew that. Sometime snippets of things, other times nothing. As far as Mr. Atkins was aware, Ms. Beilschmidt was still in the picture and Gilbert was away at college.

"Good afternoon, Ludwig. How's school been?"

Ludwig sat in the plush blue seat, back straight. "It's fine."

"Are you stressed out at all?"

Shrugging his shoulders, the blond replied. "Not really." His algebra quiz hadn't been the easiest thing in the world, but it certainly wasn't the hardest.

"Do you like any of your classes?" Mr. Atkins continued with the generic questions as he always did, hoping to someday get a more informative response.

"A few."

Sighing, Mr. Atkins pushed his glasses higher up on his nose before continuing. "Alright, Ludwig, lets get to the real questions, shall we?" He didn't wait for a response before continuing. "We both know why you're here, and I'd hate to waste your time by asking unimportant questions."

The blue-eyed teen blinked before nodding. He'd much rather be in class right now than dealing with this. It was just added stress, and it was annoying to have to lie all the time. But he already knew that if he told the truth, he'd be locked up in some mental hospital in the middle of nowhere.

"So, have you gotten your words yet?" The older man asked, briefly glancing at Ludwig's wrist that was covered by a green sleeve.

"No, not yet."

The older man nodded. "I see. And how do you feel about that?"

Ludwig paused, carefully considering his words before opening his mouth. Empty, lonely, miserable. "I feel fine." But he knew he was not as fine as he seemed.

"Is that true?"

Only slight hesitation before Ludwig spoke again. "Yes."

The man stared at him skeptically, clipboard resting on his lap as he rested one leg on top of the other. "Why don't you ever tell me the truth, Ludwig? You know you can trust me, right? Anything you say stays between you and I, unless I think you're a danger to yourself or to others, then I'll have to call your mom."

You couldn't even if you tried. "I understand."

"And even knowing that, you're still not comfortable with telling me the truth? Have you ever thought about getting counseling sessions outside of school? I can recommend a few places. But tell me, Ludwig, have you had any thoughts about hurting yourself? I've seen you over the years, and I'll admit you're expressing worrying behavior."

Ludwig's cobalt eyes widened, alarmed. What did that mean? What part of his behavior was worrying? "Mr. Atkins-"

The phone rang, a shrill shriek emitting from the device sitting on the desktop. "One second, hold on to that thought." Mr. Atkins told him as he reached over to pick up the phone, pressing the receiver to his ear. "Hello? Caleb Atkins speaking." There was a pause as he listened to the voice on the other end. "Yes, I understand. Alright, I'm with someone right now, but we're wrapping up."

After scribbling hasty words on the notepad sitting on the desk, he hung up the phone, a tight smile on his lips. "Sorry Ludwig, I'm afraid I have a pressing matter right now. But I'll check in with you next month, alright?"

"Alright." The teen agreed, standing up and walking to the door, nodding his head in goodbye to the older man before leaving.

Ludwig was hoping that Gilbert would be home by the time he got back to the apartment, although he knew Gil would still be at work.

"I'm home..." He called out, regardless of he fact that he knew there wouldn't be a reply. As he thought, no one spoke back to him, and he made his way to his room.

His room was small, light blue walls and a singular window. His bed was pressed against the corner walls, a table beside it with a lamp. Photos of himself, Gilbert and his mother covered few spots on the walls.

It wasn't much, but it was home now. It was more than he deserved. He was thankful just to have Gilbert there taking care of him. If it wasn't for Gilbert, he'd be out on the streets by now or in some crappy foster care. Although Gilbert was vain, constantly stating how awesome he was and fully believing he deserved the best, when it came down to it, he was a good brother.

Their new apartment wasn't the largest place in the world, nor the best. But it was theirs. It smelled like burnt pizza and wurst, and Gilbert's posters of bands and movies decked the walls of every available room. Dishes stacked the counters whenever Gilbert was home until Ludwig couldn't stand it any longer. It wasn't very spacious, and the neighbors were annoying as hell, but it was something.

It was home.

Plopping down on his bed, he stared at his plain white ceiling. He couldn't help but wonder, if he was so special, why did his mother leave? It'd been a year and there had been no phone calls, no texts or emails. No letters, postcards or packages. It was as if she had dropped off the face of the planet. Had she even found father? How long had she planned on leaving? Had it been a quick, rushed decision that popped in her head in the late hours of the night? Had she been carefully and skillfully planning every move of her escape?

Gilbert had told him that is was pointless to think about such things, that it'd do nothing but make him sad. Gilbert said he shouldn't live in the past, promised that she was happy. Gilbert said that she still loved them. But then again, Gilbert said a lot of things. His older brother was a good brother, but it didn't mean that everything he said was true. For instance, eight years ago Gil had said that he would get his words, and he still hadn't.

He never would.

But Gilbert kept promising him that it'd happen. It was like making a friend and promising to hang out, and having them say they'd call to find out the details. Months pass, and you remember that you never actually hung out with that person at all.

Reaching over, he picked up the hardcover book from the bedside table. Flipping it open, he dropped the bookmark beside him before starting the new chapter. Yet another story about two people meeting and falling in love because of their words. Reading books like this made him wonder what it'd be like to have words. More specifically, what his soulmate would be like.

Would they be a girl, a boy, both or none, someone in between? What would they look like? Their hobbies, personality? He wanted to know all the little quirks about them, all the little habits. Of course, that brought him to remember that there was no soulmate to learn about, and there never would be.

Closing the book, he didn't bother bookmarking his page as he put it back on his nightstand. Was this the closest he'd ever get to having someone special to him? Creating some fantasy soulmate in his head, reading about fictional characters in books and wishing they were real?

Was this what his entire life would be like? Sighing, Ludwig forced himself to get off his bed and dragged himself into the kitchen. School lunch was crap and he could barely stomach it, so by this time he was starving. Getting the pot from the cupboard he filled it with water and set in on the stove burner. As soon as the water boiled, he was going to make delicious wurst.

Looking around, he looked at the cheap clock and the posters of different foods and bands decorating the walls. Gilbert had done more than he ever should've had to at his age, providing for the two of them like this. Snapping out of his thoughts in time to notice the water begin to bubble over the edge of the pot, Ludwig knew that he would never deserve to call this place home.

To be continued

Coming next: Age 15