Interstellar: Revivisco, Part II Chapter 10: Fide, an interstellar fanfic

Interstellar: Revivisco, Part II
Chapter 10 - Fide

Amelia had fallen asleep on Cooper, who had stayed up to finish the movie. "God, you go out like a light now, don't ya?" he whispered, laying down gently, making sure that the movement didn't wake her. The couch was deep, giving them both enough room to be comfortable. Amelia's head rested on his chest, right against his heart.

"What am I going to do with you?" he whispered again, smiling. "What do I need to do to convince you that you are absolutely perfect?" He knew she wasn't a light sleeper.

He could feel her even breaths softly against his chest. "I love you too damn much to ever push you into anything. You know that right? I just thought it might be nice."

Cooper grabbed a throw pillow from behind him and put it under his head. "I wish you weren't so scared of losing me. I'm going nowhere, but I understand where that fear comes from."

"It's weird that I'm telling you all this stuff while you're asleep, but at least I can say it without you arguing that you don't deserve me, because trust me, Amelia, you deserve me - you deserve better. We're both so damaged, and you deserve to be with someone who isn't, but I love you too much and am too selfish to ever think of doing that. I think you feel the same way, or at least I hope you do." He felt her hand move slightly on his shoulder but knew that she wasn't awake.

"I know you love me or you wouldn't do the things you do for me. You give me a reason to get up in the morning, a reason to go to sleep at night. You're everything to me, you're just also very confusing, but I know I confuse you, too. That's what couples do, I guess. Before you, it had been what felt like nine and a half years since I had done the relationship thing, so I'm learning how to do this all over." Cooper watched as she shifted her head on his chest. He waited a few moments before talking again.

"I guess this baby thing... to me was the opportunity to get to have that experience again, and because I love you. That's what kids are made of, love. At least any child of ours would be. I remember when you showed me how those incubators worked, and you said you didn't believe that children were miracles, but that we were all just part of a cycle. Maybe in a scientific way that's true, but I wanted you to be able to see that it was a miracle. I felt sorry for you when you told me that, because that's when I knew that something had hurt you and changed your mind about everything. Now I know what hurt you back then: Wolf leaving. You might think it's because your body can't do it, but you know that's not the whole reason. You loved him and thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with him, then he left and you were sure that you would never love another and you devoted every waking moment to your work. Then here I come, waltzing in, or trudging in, whatever. And I've obviously been hurt, too, Amelia. Neither of us are each others first love, but we're each others last. That's why I wanted this baby, because I love you."

Cooper looked at her one more time before closing his eyes and going to sleep. She looked too peaceful to move her - the couch would just have to do.

"We're both so damaged, and you deserve to be with someone who isn't, but I love you too much and am too selfish to ever think of doing that. I think you feel the same way, or at least I hope you do.

Amelia woke up halfway, and tried to go back to sleep without waking Cooper. Had he been talking? She was now intently listening.

She was stunned as she laid there in silence, realizing that he had finally fallen asleep.

So that was why he wanted this. He'd said it so many times, but every time he tried to explain himself, she came up with an excuse or distraction. Now here she was, supposedly asleep, and he'd poured his heart out to her, believing it to be the only time he could.

The more she thought about it, the less scary it seemed. He's there for me and with me all the way, and maybe he's right about this being more than some natural cycle. This baby would be of love and I've experienced the power of love - I'm experiencing it right now.

"Cooper," she whispered as she poked on his chest. "Wake up." She watched as his eyes opened.

"Hey," he whispered back. "Why're you awake?" She got up from the couch and held out her hand.

"This isn't comfortable, let's go get in bed. Both of our backs will be complaining in the morning if we stay here." He took her offered hand and left the couch.

"You're right." They walked out of the living room and made the short trek to their room. "I just didn't want to wake you up. You looked like you were having a good sleep."

Amelia began to turn down the bed and Cooper helped. "Yeah, it was okay." Should I talk to him now? she pondered.

"You snored," he said, his voice still somewhat hoarse. "A lot."

"No, I didn't," she smiled up at him. "I don't snore." Just do it - it's going to be just as difficult or more so in the morning.

"We're still in our clothes, by the way. Might wanna change." She nodded and they both began to change into pajamas. "I don't think sleeping in jeans is comfortable."

"It's not," Amelia replied as she pulled some flannel pajama bottoms from a drawer. She decided she was too lazy and tired to change her t-shirt, expertly taking off her bra underneath it.

"That's impressive," he stated upon watching her little trick.

"What is it with you and bras lately?" She smiled upon seeing him smile.

"I like what they hold up." Amelia's smile got bigger if that was even possible. Do it!

"Cooper, I," she paused, biting her bottom lip. "I..."

"Yes?" He had finished getting into pajamas and got into the bed. "You gonna get in the bed or not?"

Amelia walked over and crawled in. You can do this. "I heard almost everything you said back there." She heard him make some noise that she knew was of disappointment.

"Shit," he huffed, looking at her. "Why didn't you say anything? You should have said something."

"Well I am now, aren't I?" He didn't reply as she scooted closer to him. He seemed to be scared of what she could say, but pleasantly shocked by her tone. "The things you said about why I was hurt, you were right. I hadn't even realized it until then. My fear of having a child is rooted in my fear of abandonment."

"I'm not going anywhere." She knew that before, but now she was more sure than she had ever been.

"I know that, and I have known that." She could tell he was hanging on every last word. "I know we're damaged, but that's just part of who we are." She took his right hand and held it to her lips. "You also give me a reason to live, to wake up in the morning and to go to sleep at night." She lightly kissed his knuckles. "And you are my last love. If you hadn't come into my life when you did, I'd hate to know what would have happened to me." He still looked as if he was waiting for her to say something heart crushing. "Cooper, you said that any baby of ours would be of love, and I know what love does; I've seen it, I've felt it. I experience love every day now."

"Are you..." he stopped himself as she kissed him. She pulled away, smiling.

"Yes." He kissed her again, laughing in between each short break.

"You want this?" She nodded and began to laugh, too.

"I hadn't been listening to you. It took me pretending to be asleep in order to finally let you say what you needed to. You didn't know that I was listening - you're always honest, but you were really honest then. That's when it all clicked that this is right. It's like when I told you that I loved you, I think I had known for a long time, I just hadn't realized it. It took something big to make me realize my feelings," she explained.

"They're beginning the incubation process on one of the eggs today. Today. Holy shit." Amelia stood in the doorway of Cooper's office which was now cluttered. She tried her best not to do anything about the mess.

"You're not regretting this, are you?" She shook her head and walked toward him, hands in her pockets, noticing his smile.

"No, it's just all very, very real." Amelia looked to her right out the window. "It's going to have to sink in." Cooper had already let it sink in a while ago. "I'm excited, of course."

"Good, because I am, too," he said as he got up from the big leather office chair. "So, we're having a baby, I guess?"

"We're having a baby, you know," she replied, smiling. "You've got a lot to teach me, Cooper. I'm scared but excited. I've never baby-proofed anything before." Cooper was suddenly in front of her, happiness radiating off of him.

"You'll be fine - half of it's instinct." Amelia smiled and shook her head. "We're going to be alright. This little girl's gonna be the best thing that ever happened to ya, I promise."

"You're saying that you aren't? If that's how you feel," she paused, looking up at him jokingly.

"Oh, you know what I mean," he muttered as he walked back toward his desk. "When can we go take a look?"

"There won't be anything to really look at for a while, but I'm curious, too. I'd like to go next week, maybe?" Cooper seemed to be okay with that.

"When you did this on Earth, were any of them born premature and how did you know it was time? Does the water break naturally?" Cooper went back to sitting in the revolving leather chair.

"It didn't happen, but it can, I'm sure. The chances would be slim, and the units are probably much more advanced now, but when we were doing it, once we acknowledged that the baby was at a healthy weight and it would be safe to deliver, we just pulled out the tube, opened the hatch, cut the bag and pulled them out carefully. Pretty painless on the baby." She walked around to his side of the desk and sat on the structure. "That might not be what they do now, though."

"Would we be there?" he asked.

"If we wanted to be, yes, I'm sure that we could be. Pates said that they went to check on their kids all the time, and if that's the case, I'm sure they allow us to be in there when they perform the birth." CASE walked in, screen glowing.

"I heard my name. Is everything alright?" Amelia and Cooper both looked at him.

"Yeah, CASE, we're fine," Cooper replied, watching as the robot turned around. Amelia smiled. "Came in because you said case," he whispered, "with a completely different meaning." Cooper looked down at her shoes - little black flats. That seemed appropriate for her, and dark jeans. "No leggings today, I see. Bummer." Amelia attempted to get down from the desk. "Nuh-uh, you're staying right there where we can have a serious discussion about this." She knew he was joking but it was still one of those moments that made her heart race in the good way. "Not sayin' you don't look good in jeans, because you do," he said as he got up from the chair, standing right in front of her, hands at the top of her thighs. "I just want to make sure that you know what I prefer."

"You're not the boss of me," she replied playfully, putting a finger to his chest.

"Are you sure? Do you remember last night at all?" Cooper questioned with a smirk. Amelia threw her head back in laughter, trying to avoid his gaze. "Ah ha, so you do." His fingers delicately landed on her chin, lightly pushing down for their eyes to meet. She had tried to look relaxed, like she didn't care, knowing it would drive him crazy in the best way possible. Their lips met, hands suddenly on each other.

"So, uhm, lovebirds... your friend Pates is on his way." They immediately stopped and saw TARS at the door. "Better me than him, right?"

"Guess so, bud." Cooper huffed in frustration, and Amelia bit her bottom lip, trying to hide her smile. "Best we get ourselves together."

"I suppose," Amelia agreed, hopping off the desk, kissing him again.

1 week, 6 days until the launch of the Endurance Mission

"Brand, your father wants you in his office." She looked up from her notes and saw Doyle.

"Okay. Why do I get the feeling that I'm in trouble?" Doyle smiled and shook his head.

"I doubt you're in trouble. I think he just wants to talk." Amelia nodded and got up from her desk.

"Still feels like I'm getting sent to the principal's office," she said as she walked past him and down the hall toward her father's office. "What could he want?" She saw the door was closed and knocked. "Dad?"

"Ah, yes, Amelia. Come in," Professor Brand exclaimed, and Amelia opened the door.

"What's wrong?" she asked as she walked toward his desk, grabbing a chair and putting it in front of the desk as usual.

"Nothing's wrong. I think it would be understandable that a father might want to spend some time with his daughter before she's to leave." Amelia tried not to acknowledge that she would soon be gone and may never see her father again. "Are you ready?"

"No," she replied honestly, "I mean, I am but I'm not all at once." She watched her father's expression - his weak smile.

"It is understandable to have some fears about this, but also it is a great journey and honor to be going on this trip. Remember what Dr. Mann said?" She slouched in the chair.

"To be brave and to go into the unknown without fear." He nodded and turned in his chair.

"You know that poem I love so much," John Brand reminded her, "do not go gentle into that goodnight, old-"

"Age should burn and rave at close of day. Rage, rage against the dying of the light." They smiled at each other.

"Be brave, Amelia. I have faith."

Amelia stood in the guest room, knowing that before she knew it that bed would be gone and a crib would be in its place.

"Didn't think I'd ever be doing this," she whispered, turning around. She saw herself in the large mirror in the room and stood up straight.

I think you'd be happy for me, dad... for us if you were here. Is this some kind of 'told you so' moment? She smiled and shook her head. I doubt it, but I think you'd be happy for us nonetheless. Who would've thought, huh? I didn't trust him one bit and now I trust him more than I trust myself.

Amelia looked at the pale blue walls and knew that would need to be changed. Anything but pink.