A/N: Hi guys. Just a short little update while I'm here at Disneyland, Having tons of fun here! ^^

Warnings: Leon's slightly OOC but what do you expect after what happened to him? ; ;

Con. A/n: Hope you guys like it, tell me what you think. Next chap'll be about Yuffie's party. ^^'

Chapter 4

Leon shifted slightly and noticed he was lying on his left side with his wounded shoulder balanced nicely on top of him. Too tired to open his eyes, he curled in on himself when a thought entered his mind; there was no pain! He had so many fractured pieces, his body should be screaming in pain, but no…. There was nothing. This got him to open his eyes and he was shocked to see where he was. He lie in the tall, soft grass in the middle of a flowery field.

"How did I get here? There's no field like this near Radiant Gardens…!?" Suddenly, his heart began to race in his chest as he felt someone drop to their knees behind him; his body stiffened as he felt a hand gently brush his side.

"Sshhh… Did you call me, my love?" All panic, fear and anxiety flew away as he felt himself melt into the touch at the sound of the lovely, familiar voice. Feeling like his bones were made of pudding, Leon turned his head to look up at the person leaning over him. He was greeted by the most beautiful sight; his Rinoa smiling down at him. He hadn't seen her in real life for years, but these rare times where he saw her in dreams like this, it was like she aged along with him.

"…Rin-!" He was cut off by her placing a finger to his lips.

"Sshhhh… It's alright, I'm here…" she gently pressed his head down onto the pillow below him and rested her own head on his side, brushing one hand through his hair and the other brushed over his chest in a calming manor, "What's bothering you, Squall….?" He didn't stiffen at his old name but just melted more at her touch.

"I…. I…" He started to choke on his words as all the bad emotions came rushing back and he began to shiver.

"It's okay… You can do it…." Rinoa always knew when it was hardest for him to get his thoughts out. Leon shut his eyes tightly to hold back the tears of frustration that want to burst forth.

'I. Do. NOT. Cry!' The thought rushed through his mind and the dam broke and tears slipped forth along with the feeling of being weak and pathetic.

"I can't do this!...!" The words came out in a sob, he was glad this was only a dream; he would never live down the humiliation of Cloud and the girls seeing him cry or worse, Sora and his little island friends!

"Do what, Squall…?" Rinoa asked softly, leaning up and over to kiss away the tears on his face.

"This! I-I can't take it! It's too much! Nothing feels right and all my emotions just want to gush forth, I can't hide them away like normal!" He gasped for air and shut his eyes tighter.

"That's normal… It's all very normal to feel this way after what's happened…" Rinoa whispered softly as she laid her chin in the crook of his neck, "This isn't something you can just shove down, Squall… It was very traumatic and you need to work through it slowly… It won't go away just because you want it to…"

"But I shouldn't feel like this! I shouldn't feel scared of my own friend's touch! That filth never actually did IT to me!" Leon growled in self-loathing as he referenced the attempt of rape against him. Rinoa brushed his long bangs out of his icy blue eyes and lovingly kissed his ear.

"Squall, it's very natural to feel that way…" She nuzzled the back of his neck, "Where the physical rape may have been stopped before he actually touched you, his actions and the actions of his two partners have in reality raped your mind and emotions… Scarring them heavily… They betrayed you and everything you've done for Radiant Gardens. They've stolen something very special from you and your sub-conscious is just trying to get it back…"

"W-what did they take…?"Leon was very confused and his raging emotions only made her harder to understand…

"You."

"What?! What're you talking about, Rin, I'm still here..!"

"No, you're not. They've stolen you, your soul. They've stolen away the thing very thing that makes you Squall or Leon Leonhart. They took your control, your sense of safety in your own abilities and the comfort in the safety you get from your friends that love and care for you." She gently rolled him onto his back and leaned over him with one arm on the other side of him as she used her free hand to brush through his hair. She sighed gently and gave him a soft yet hurting smile. "Squall, it'll be a long and hard process but you'll have to learn to trust again and be confident…"

"…But… But, it was so hard the first time…" His voice almost a whisper as the pain from his shattering emotions made the tears start drip softly again.

"I know.. But I also know that you're my strong knight and have the strength to overcome this… Even though it's hard… I'll try to help you but I have to go know, you need to rest and heal…." She leaned over to kiss him gently on the lips before the dream started to fade away…

"…Don't leave me…. …Please, not again…." His words were just a broken whisper as he faded into a deeper sleep.

~KH~

Had anyone actually stepped into his room and peered over at his bed, they would have seen his bedside lamp cast a soft glow over him, illuminating the forbidden tears that dripped from his sleeping eyes and the soft white feathers that covered his bed like a blanket.