They say that time heals all wounds, and Rachel was just waiting for the moment when that became true for her. It should have been easier now to see Finn at school but it just wasn't getting that way. Sure, she had her friends on her side, and Noah had been absolutely wonderful in his pursuit to get her over the Frankenteen once and for all. However, when Rachel was alone at night and the lights were down, it didn't stop her mind from wandering. She could be angry and strong all day long and pretend that she was over it. Yet, as soon as day gave way to night, she knew that she would have to be honest with herself and remember.

Noah's little plan of her last day of grieving had been good in theory. It was a wonderful thought really, this idea that she would just get over him in the blink of an eye. He had believed that it could work so strongly that she had let herself believe it. But when she woke up the next day and found one of his old shirts in the laundry room, it only reminded her of everything she had lost. For a girl who had spent most of her life with only her fathers to count on, it was still a hard lesson to learn and relearn and then relearn all over again.

If only she could be angry, just angry at him, this would all be easier. If she didn't look at him and still see a thousand memories and a million promises. If she didn't look at him and still feel a swarm of butterflies fluttering around her stomach. If she didn't know what it was like to hold him and be held by him. If only, if only, if only. But she saw these things, felt them and knew them. It sadness and the regret far outweighed the anger most of the time. It was a pretty dangerous battle from where she stood.

"I am not going to sing with him, Mr. Schue." Rachel looked up at her teacher pleadingly. She had never wanted to not sing a song, but right now, staring at Finn, she did not want to be the female lead in this very romantic ballad. "I mean it, have Santana do it. Or Quinn or Mercedes or Tina. Even Brittany or Sugar, I don't care who does it as long as it's not me."

"Give me a break, Rachel," Finn rolled his eyes before looking over his shoulder to smirk at Santana. "Isn't this exactly what we went through last week when you told me that it wasn't about us? You're the female lead, you have to do this."

Mr. Schuester looked between the two of them and took a deep breath. He had no idea that he had signed up to be an emotional referee when he had agreed to take over the Glee Club and teach Spanish at McKinley. "Rachel, Finn's right. You did give him a lecture last week about why you two should still be able to perform together," he reminded her. "If you expected him to be as mature last week, I think we should be able to expect the same out of you."

"But this is a love song."

"And?"

"And we're not in love anymore, Mr. Schue!" she exclaimed haughtily. "While I know that my acting skills are exemplary, I don't think even I have the emotional gusto to pull this off. Finn and I hate each other right now, and professing a non-existent love would be detrimental to our performance. It would be counterproductive to the theme we are trying to achieve with these pieces. I would really hate to see the whole group suffer just because you couldn't find it in you to properly train another one of the singers."

Mr. Schuester stared at her for a moment, pinching the bridge of his nose in a very vain attempt to ward off the forthcoming migraine he was sure would strike any moment. Just as he was about to respond, Puck ambled down the stairs and grabbed her by the elbow. "Give us a minute," he said, more demanding than asking. Everyone could only watch helplessly as he took Rachel out into the hallway. "Alrgiht, Berry, you're gonna have to chill."

"I can't do this, Noah, I can't sing with him!"

Puck rubbed a hand down her arm and stared down into her eyes intently. "First of all, Rachel Berry can perform anything with anyone, so there won't be any of that false modesty," he told her. "Secondly, what you told Finn last week was right. This isn't just about you two. Everyone in that room, including me, has worked really hard these past three years to get us to where we are. We want to go to Nationals and we want to win them. As much as I hate to say it, you and Hudson are the best bet we got. Your chemistry when you're singing together is undeniable. You can do this, Rach, because you have to do it. If you can't do it for Mr. Schue or the others or yourself, do it for me. How else am I ever going to see New York?"

Rachel smiled at the question. "You know, you could just come visit me next year…"

"Not the point, Berry," he chuckled, tapping her on the nose. "I know it's not easy being around him, especially not when you have to express things you don't want to feel anymore. But look at it all as the greatest acting role of your life. Become a character, anyone who's not you, and treat Finn the same. And if that still won't work, then look for me. I'm always right there with you. Sing to me if it'll make it easier. We just need to hear that gorgeous voice of yours."

She only thought about it for a moment before she slowly nodded her agreement. "Fine, I guess I can do it for you. And for Quinn and whoever else is still on my side," she allowed. "But if he say's anything else…"

"I got your back, Berry," he promised her before kissing the top of her head. She wrapped her fingers around his wrist and followed him back into the choir room. He stopped and looked at his former best friend and then at their teacher. "She is going to sing this song with him but that's it. Only one duet, we need to figure out something for the other two pieces."

"Oh, so now Puck's defending you?"

Puck turned and looked at Santana. "Berry doesn't need me to protect her, Satan, so can it."

"Really, taking her side? I thought more of you, Noah," she sneered back. As much as Puck loved the Latina girl, he could also really hate her sometimes. He knew that she was jealous, used to having him forever on her side, and anyone that jeopardized their twisted little friendship was viewed as a threat. He'd deal with that later. For now, he just laughed humorlessly at her and shook his head. "What's so funny?"

"The fact that you're on Finn's side is down right hilarious," he retorted before turning back to Rachel. "One song and you're done, obligation fulfilled. You cool?"

As soon as Rachel nodded, Finn took it as his signal to jump in. "What are you doing, Rachel? You couldn't have me so you're moving onto him? You might not need him to defend you but you're certainly letting him do your bidding."

"Finn, it doesn't have to be like this."

"You're hot one minute and you're cold the next. What is going on with you?" he asked rhetorically. "I can't sing with you and you make me seem like the worst person on the planet. You can't sing with me and it's still somehow my fault. You're letting someone else speak for you now. Where's the Rachel I know, where's my Rachel?"

Puck was about to say something when she pressed her palm flat to his chest to stop him. "I am not your Rachel, Finn," she said softly, evenly. "That stopped when you decided that it had to be all or nothing and that anything in between wasn't good enough for you. That stopped when you refused to compromise when you couldn't have it just your way. That stopped when you realized that I meant what I said when I told you my dreams every single day for the past three years. That stopped when I realized that you didn't really know me at all if you thought that I was just going to give them up. That stopped, Finn, it's done."

"Maybe you're right, maybe we shouldn't sing this together."

"Or maybe," Mr. Schue said aloud, "we should take this as an opportunity for a lesson. Rather than make it a romantic ballad, let it tell about letting go."

Puck looked at him incredulously. "Our lives aren't just lessons for you to teach, opportunities for you to perfect your song list. I feel like something is wrong with this situation if I'm the one pointing out you're being insensitive."

"Noah, maybe he's right. Finn and I simply can't sing this song."

"Oh, you can and you will," Quinn announced as she stood up. "We've all learned the choreography and backgrounds to this song. I have college applications and family obligations and about a million other things to deal with without having to add this nonsense on top of it. Get your head in the game, Rachel. You're a professional, you got this." Finn looked at the blonde with a little bit of wonder in his eyes. She glanced up at him and had to shake her head. "You too, Finn. Puck's right, you both need to man up and just get through it."

"Fine," Rachel huffed as Finn crossed his arms and muttered, "Whatever."

A painful half-hour later, the song actually sounded pretty perfect if Rachel could just stop staring daggers at Finn and he didn't recoil every time her hand brushed his. Having had enough for the day, Mr. Schue threw in the towel early and dismissed them with the announcement of an extra practice the next afternoon. Finn was the first one out of the room, Santana and Kurt hot on his heels. Rachel couldn't find it in her to care all that much as she lingered behind to meticulously pack away her sheet music. Quinn offered Puck an apologetic wave before trotting out after Brittany. Soon, the two of them were left alone with only the silent Brad, who was working away at tuning the piano in the corner.

"Okay, so that wasn't exactly my proudest moment."

"You definitely took a few steps back there, Rach."

"I want to hate him, Noah, I do. It'd be so much easier."

"I've thought that a million times about Quinn and look where that got us," he laughed. "The two of us were the only ones in agreement on anything. It feels like sophomore year all over again, us four mixed up in this web where Santana is weirdly hovering around the edges. That turned out to be a disaster all around, and I don't want that to be a repeat for any of us."

She looked down at her patent red flats and then up at him. "Thanks for sticking up for me back there."

"I told you that I got your back, but you have got to figure out how you want to do this. It's hypocritical to expect one thing from him and to do another in the next breath. Do you want to hide out this year or do you want to make the most of your senior year? You only get one, Berry, and you're the only one who can decide what that looks like."

"I don't know what I want, Noah."

"Well, I'm trying to help you here, Rach, but I can't do that if you won't let me," he reminded her. "You know where to find me when you know which direction you want to go."

Author's note: Sorry that I have been away so long form this story. I got caught up in a few other and then life was busy and then there was Cory's passing. I wasn't sure where to take it because I knew Finn wasn't going to be a good guy in my fic. I thought about changing that but felt like it wouldn't be authentic to my personal storytelling approach. So while I am sad for his loss, I hope you'll hang in with me for this story. Xoxo.