Chapter 68

John stood on one of the outer balconies of Atlantis, staring off into space. So focused he was on his thought, he did not hear Teyla as she approached.

"Staring off into the distance must be a common trait to the humans of Earth, I don't think I have seen a single person that does not do it."

He smiled. He always valued Teyla's ability to be frank, especially in moments where he needed it the most.

"I don't think you can pinpoint it as strictly a human thing, I have seen you stare off on more than one occasion."

"Well, then it must be from spending so much time with you."

Teyla smiled and rested her elbows on the balcony rail, taking a good look at the Colonel.

"Elizabeth told me what you have planned. Do you truly believe it to be wise?"

"Honestly, no. But in reality, I don't think we have much of a choice. Its the only ace we have."

"How do we know that Netan can be trusted?"

"Colonel Carter seems to have faith in him, and truth be told, Sam has a tendancy to be right more often than not."

Teyla gave John a long look before she too began to stare off into space, "I lived my entire life at the mercy of the Wraith. My people, my family, terrorized and murdered for their own ends. The Ascended are no different. We may revere The Ancients, but they are not The Ancients anymore. Ascension has changed them. With the way they manipulate and use people and all to meet their own ends, they are no different from The Wraith. And if The Ori mak their way here, I fear that we will have no choice but to bend in submission. You freed me and my people from the mercy of The Wraith, along with who knows how many others. I will not bend again. None of us will. We must fight for our freedom, our die trying."

"Yeah, its not the fighting part that is giving me pause."

John gave Teyla one last look before he rested his elbows on the balcony rail, looking once more out at the magestic ocean, and wondering how much longer he would be around to see it.

ooooooo

The inn was practically empty, but still that did not give him respite. Most of the townspeople were off preparing for the coming battle, which made it much easier for him to find a room on such short notice. The innkeeper Lyros, was a kind, ederly man, half-blind and hunchbacked with age. He lived there with his wife Myreena, a good ten years younger, who was still quite comely with her advanced age and always wore a kind smile. He had come to the inn in the middle of the storm, grasping the bundle carefully, yet tightly, to his chest. They had held up in a nearby cave for the better part of a few hours, with only some milk he had managed to swindle from the ships stores before fleeing.

It was only when it had run dry was he forced to leave from their hiding place. The rain had come almost an hour in, making the basket that had carried her around in too dangerous to keep for fear it would fill and drown the child. It was hours before he found anything but trees and had come upon the inn only by chance. It had looked like a farm house from the distance and more than likely had been a farm house at one time. He had clutched the child tightly to his chest and ran faster than he thought possible. When he had reached the door, he was out of breath and sodden with rain.

Myreena answered the door and after taking one look at the bundle in his arms, ushered him immediately in. She called for Lyros, who immediately ran up the stairs and came down moments later with another man, if he had to guess around middle age, looking concerned. He asked to see the child, and instinct told him to only draw her closer. However the man said his name was a Healer and he just wanted to make sure the child was not ill from the rain. He relented and after a few anxious moments she was returned to him, dressed in dry clothes and smiling. The Healer looked at him cautiously, asking him who he was and how he had come upon the child.

Knowing that he could not be too trusting, he told the man that he and his wife were traveling from a distant village when she gave birth. His wife fell ill but they were in a heavy wooded area and she fell ill with childbed fever, dying not too long after. Knowing that they could not stay in the woods, he milked a goat for the babe and began walking in search of help. The Healer eyed him wearily before seeming to accept his story. He offered condolences and Lyros said they could stay at the inn as long as he needed to ensure the child stayed healthy and strong. The babe began to cry soon after and Myreena shouted something he did not understand up the stairs the Healer had come down from.

A few minutes passed before a young, dark haired girl came bellowing down and stood by Myreena's side. The girl smiled at him sweetly as Myreena told him she could nurse the child for him. He hesistated. But there was something about the girl, warm and familiar, and he pushed his hesitation aside. The child seemed to take to her instantly, and for the first time in what seemed like days, he felt as if a weight was lifted from his shoulders. He was given a room atop the loft by the staircase. It was large enough for him and the child and close to the room of the young woman that she could easily hear the childs cries and attend her as needed.

He would find himself watching her, although he told himself he was keeping an eye on the child. From afar she looked like Vala, or what he thought Vala would have looked like if she were younger. Although her features were very different, they shared a same profile and long flowing dark hair. He found it bittersweet. A great sadness overtook him and for a moment, he forgot where he was and began to cry.

"Are you allright?" the woman asked breaking him out of his concentration. Seeing that she was still nursing, he turned around, embarassed to have been caught watching them.

"There is no need to turn away sir."

"You are bare of breast and I am not your husband, it would be indecent."

"It is life," she said as she walked purposefully into his line of vision. "I am keeping the child alive. There is nothing indecent about it."

"It still is not right. You are a maiden and I am newly widowed."

"I am no maid, sir, and I am no longer married," she said placing the child, who had fallen asleep, in nearby basket Myreena has fashioned into a crib.

He looked up to her shocked, "I am so very sorry."

She smiled softly and for the first time he noticed she had not relaced her bodice after having put the babe down.

"He did not die," she sighed as she walked over and sat down on the bed. "He left me."

She started to cry. He walked over to her instantly, sitting beside her. She wept on his shoulder.

"Why did he leave you?"

"For the war. For folly. For The Ori. I told him to come with me. That he didn't need to fight. That we could run off together. But he did not listen. Ten years we were married and he threw it away as if it meant nothing."

"He is a fool then."

His words did not bring the comfort he thought they would. It only caused her to cry more.

"You don't understand. He has shamed me. We cannot dare say that we did not believe in The Ori's cause so everyone think I was somehow lacking. I will spend the rest of my life as a maid. No man will marry me. I will bear no children of my own. So I came to Myreena to learn to be a wet nurse in the hopes of gaining some kind of meaning with my life. But these last few days, with the child, it reminds me of everything I will never have."

He didn't know why he said it and the words fell from his mouth faster than his mind could comprehend what he was saying.

"I will marry you."

Shock ran across the girls face, "You mean it? Truly. Please tell me you are not jesting."

He had not meant to say those words, but maybe deep down he did. He knew he could not walk around a man alone with a child without raising suspicion. He was planning on traveling to one of the outer planets anyway. Where no one knew him. It would be easier with a wife and the child seemed to take to her as if she were her natural mother.

"Yes," he said strongly. "I loved my wife dearly and always will. But she is gone and our daughter needs a mother. She seems to have taken to you. With her gone I cannot bear to return to our village, so I am looking to settle elsewhere. I can take you as a wife and with you nursing the child no one need know you are not her natural mother. If you consent to marry me, you will be my wife and no one will ever know of your past shame."

The girl could only smile, "Lyros can be the one to marry us. He owns the house and the lands it sits on and landowners can give consent to wed. And Myreen and Terik, can be our witnesses. That is all we need."

In the back of his mind, it kept screaming at him to put an end to this folly, that he was making a mistake. But one look at the girls bright face caused him to push back those thoughts. "Then we must tell him. We will be wed at once."

For a second he thought he saw the most wicked of grin's flash across her face and eyes, the kind that a predator would give when it knew its prey was caught. It was so fleeting that he had convinced himself that he had imagined it. That his mind was playing tricks on him.

"Well," she smiled up sweetly at him, "If we are to be husband and wife, we must know what to call one another."

"Tomin," he said as he placed a soft kiss on her cheek.

"Tomin," she repeated as she grabbed his hand and guided it towards the unlaced top of her bodice - caressing the softness of her chest.

"And what may I call you?," he stuttered slightly as she pulled them both down onto the bed.

"My name is Aleajandra," she whispered as she began to kiss him softly on the neck. "But please, call me Aja."