Chapter Seventeen

"Ajay," said Sam. "The reaper's name is Ajay."

"So we just find him and book a tour?" asked Dean.

Sam nodded.

"What about me?" asked Adam, kicking the back of the Impala's seat. "What do I do while you're off doing whatever?"

Sam and Dean looked at each other uneasily. "Maybe you could stay with Kevin and Garth," suggested Sam.

Adam shook his head. "No," he said emphatically. "I want in."

"No," refused Dean firmly. "Kid, you're inexperienced. You're going to get yourself killed."

"Then tell me what to do!" Adam demanded angrily. "Teach me!"

"There isn't enough time, Adam," Sam told him patiently. "You're going to have to sit this one out."

"You never let me do anything!" Adam yelled, crossing his arms. He was aware he was throwing a temper tantrum, but he didn't care. "Why do you have to treat me like a baby?"

"You're only 18, Adam," Sam said softly.

"I'm 23!" Adam corrected.

"18," repeated Sam, even as both his brothers looked at him in surprise. "It's been 23 years since you were born, but – see, you were 18 when the ghoul ate you. That makes you 18 when the angels raised you. 18 all that time in the Cage. You're still, in fact, 18."

Adam looked astonished. "18? I don't feel 18."

"I don't feel 29," Sam said. "Dean doesn't feel 34. But we are. In Earth years, anyway."

No one spoke after that. It was still sinking in, and it just confirmed Adam's belief that they weren't going to let him on any hunts anytime soon. Sulking, looked outside the window and pretended he didn't see the looks Sam and Dean were throwing at him.

"Dean, come here." He grabbed his brother's arm and dragged him away from the conversation, leaving Ajay waiting by his cab.

"Dean, I have to do this solo," he said once they were out of earshot. Adam was still sulking, glaring at them from the backseat of the Impala.

"Sammy, this is Bobby we're talking about," Dean said. "You can't miss."

Sam pulled back his jacket to show Dean the knife hidden there. "I won't."

Dean looked like he didn't agree with it, but he knew he had no choice. Crossing his arms, he asked, "What about Adam?"

"What about him?"

"Dean, you're going to have to look after him while I'm gone," Sam reminded him.

"Maybe I could come with you." Sam and Dean both jumped and then turned around. Adam had left the car and was standing next to them, listening and looking determined.

"No you can't, Adam," Dean said, at the same time that Sam said, "I'm going to Hell, Adam."

"According to you people I'm sorta demonish," Adam argued. "Maybe I can help."

"Adam, you're not 'sorta demonish'," Sam said. "You have leftover energy from the Cage. There's a difference."

"I can still help!" insisted Adam. "Please, just let me–"

"No." Dean's tone closed the case. "Sam's going to go on his field trip, and I'm going to babysit you in the meanwhile. End of story."

"But Dean–"

"I said no."

"Dean, if you'd just listen–" Adam tried again.

"No, Adam!"

Adam flinched at the shout, and even Sam looked shocked. Dean was absolutely livid. "Get back in the car," he seethed. "Now!"

Adam left without a word, his shoulders hunched. "Maybe you shouldn't have yelled at him, Dean," Sam said softly.

"What else could I have done?" retorted Dean. "He wasn't listening to us! Doesn't he realize–"

"All the same," said Sam, glancing in the Impala's direction. Adam could be seen in the backseat, and it looked a horrible lot like he was crying. "He's just a kid, Dean. After everything he's been through... he doesn't need us to yell at him."

Dean softened. "I know, Sammy," he said, dragging a hand down his face. "I just don't want anything to happen to him. That's all. He's inexperienced. And going to Hell when Lucifer's hanging around in his nut? Not a good idea, man."

Sam nodded. "You're right, Dean," he sighed.

"I'll go talk to him," Dean promised. "Once you've left."

"Okay, Dean." They walked back to Ajay, and the deal was outlined.

"Adam, listen to me," said Dean, once Sam had left and he was back in the Impala. "I know you're angry."

Adam's reply was an angry noise in the back of his throat.

"I shouldn't have yelled at you," Dean said, hoping his quiet tone would appease his brother. "I'm sorry, okay? I just need you to understand... Lucifer's riding shotgun in your head. You're inexperienced. You haven't hunted in your life. I can't just let you go to Hell, even if it's for 24 hours."

For a few moments he thought Adam was not going to reply, but then the boy untangled his arms and said, voice small and no longer angry, "I just want to be able to help you guys. I don't wanna be a useless burden."

"You're not a useless burden," Dean told him. "I don't know what Lucifer's been telling you, Adam, but it's not true, whatever it is. We want you around."

Adam didn't answer; Lucifer's words were still ringing in his head, and it didn't help that he was sitting right there casually putting knives through Dean's neck. "He's bullshitting you, stupid," Lucifer told him. "Of course he doesn't mean it."

"I mean it," Dean said, like he had heard Lucifer.

"Thank you," was all Adam said. He suddenly found he didn't even have the energy left to be angry or resentful or anything else.

It had been hours since they had turned in for the night, and for the first time in a few weeks Dean had a bed to himself. Under normal circumstances he would have been grateful for being able to stretch his limbs out, but right now it didn't feel right. The space at his side felt too empty. He was lying with his eyes closed but he knew that until Sam returned he wouldn't be able to sleep a wink.

In the other bed Adam was tossing and turning, and it was bothering Dean. He knew the kid was sleep-deprived – it was obvious in the shadows under his eyes and his weary demeanor, but he didn't know how to help him. Even when Sam had been unable to sleep at night he had simply pretended, and Dean had let him. Dean hadn't known what to do then, and he still didn't. It didn't help that he had known Adam only for a few weeks.

"Can't sleep?" asked Lucifer much too brightly, considering he was the reason for Adam's insomnia.

"Fuck off," whispered Adam angrily, burying his face into his pillow, but it seemed that the Devil was burned into his eyelids.

"You can't run from me, Adam," whispered Lucifer into his ear. "I'm everywhere. I'm a part of you. You think this is real, this easy life with your brothers? Think again, kid. The Cage is real. The Cage is your only truth. Your only existence."

"Go away," muttered Adam. "Just leave."

"One day you're going to wake up, and you won't be here," predicted Lucifer. "You'll be back in the Cage, back where you belong... and that's your reality."

Despite himself Adam roared "NO!" and threw his pillow in the general direction of Lucifer. Immediately Dean was up and scrambling over to Adam's side, shaking his shoulder.

"Adam, kid, wake up!" he was saying in urgent tones. "Wake up!"

"I'm awake," Adam told him, sitting up. "I'm fine. Just – just a nightmare."

Dean narrowed his eyes at him. "I don't believe you," he told him squarely. "You look like shit, kid. And Sam knows you haven't been sleeping. He's been there, done that, remember?"

Adam had the decency to look slightly abashed. "Didn't wanna bother you," he mumbled.

Dean nearly facepalmed. "You're not bothering us," he said, remembering Sam's advice to be patient. "We just want to help you, Adam."

"Okay, fine," sighed Adam. "Lucifer was being irritating."

"How long has he been bothering you?" asked Dean.

"Constantly for the past couple of days," admitted Adam, not looking Dean in the eye.

Dean sat down next to him on the bed. "Is he here now?"

Adam bit his bottom lip and nodded. "Yeah. He's sitting right next to you telling me you're bullshitting me when you say you care."

"Tell him to go fuck himself," Dean told Adam fiercely. "When did you last sleep?"

"He says you're being rude," Adam told Dean. "And, uh, I think it was the day before? A couple of hours in the car."

Dean looked stunned. "And you haven't slept since?" he asked incredulously.

Adam nodded. "He won't let me. Every time I try to, he wakes me up."

Dean didn't answer, his brain going at the speed of light. For the millionth time he wished Sam was here; he'd know just what to do. For some reason Sam had always been good with Adam. Dean knew what to do to help Sam, but when it came to Adam he was clueless.

Suddenly he was hit with an idea. "Lie down," he told Adam.

Adam obliged, asking, "What are you doing?"

"This is something that always helps Sam sleep," Dean told him. "I don't know if it might help you... but I'm going to try."

"Okay," said Adam, not caring that there was probably cuddling involved. He was desperate and sleep-deprived enough to sell his grandmother if it helped. Not that he could. She'd died years ago.

Dean placed a hand on Adam's forehead. "Close your eyes," he said. "Try not to think of anything."

"Not really helpful since Lucifer's singing in my ear," Adam muttered, but he closed his eyes anyway.

"You're home," Dean told him, running his palm over Adam's head. "You're in your bed at home. Everything's all right. You're fine. We're all fine. It's all good."

Strangely enough, Adam seemed to relax a little.

"It's okay, Adam," murmured Dean, smoothing Adam's hair back. "It's okay. It's okay." He repeated the mantra until he felt Adam grow heavy under his palm, the boy's breathing evening out and getting deeper. Miraculously... he was asleep.

Dean stood. "Screw you," he said smugly to where he thought Lucifer might be standing.

"Where are we going?" asked Adam early the next morning, yawning. They were back in the Impala, with Adam sitting up front next to Dean.

"Kevin's," answered Dean. "I figured we'll camp out there until Sam comes back. God knows the kid could use some company."

"Do you really think Crowley might know where he is?" asked Adam sleepily.

"I don't know," replied Dean tersely. "It's worrying me, to be honest. And where the hell does Garth keep going off to?! We asked him to watch over Kevin, not to ditch him all the time!"

"Well, Kevin's not a baby," Adam pointed out. "He can look after himself."

"He's only 18," Dean told Adam. "And he's not a hunter. He needs someone experienced to look after him, make sure nothing gets to him."

"Why can't you teach him, then?" asked Adam. "I think he'd appreciate the knowledge."

"Because teaching him will take time... time we don't have."

Adam considered this. "So... it's only a matter of time before Crowley does find him, isn't it?" When Dean nodded, he asked, "What happens then?"

"I don't know, but it won't be good," Dean said.

"What's he even doing in there?" wondered Adam. It had been an hour since Kevin had locked himself into his closet.

"Translating, I assume," Dean muttered. "Leave him be, he's scared shitless and grouchy as fuck."

"Dean." It wasn't Adam's voice, and immediately Dean was on his feet, shoving Adam behind him.

As soon as Adam saw who it was, he gripped Dean's sleeve tight. Before he could say a word, Naomi held out her hand. "I don't believe we've met. I'm Naomi."

Dean automatically took a step backward, ignoring her extended hand. "I know who you are," he said warily. "You're the one been screwing around with Cas's head. And Adam's."

"I wouldn't call it 'screwing around', exactly," she stated, withdrawing her hand. "I lost a lot of angels on the mission to rescue him from Purgatory."

"You asked him to kill me!" Dean said loudly, making sure Adam was still shielded.

"She did?" asked Adam. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Let the adults talk, Adam," said Naomi condescendingly. "It's true that I asked him to get the Angel Tablet at all costs, Dean. And I was only trying to help him."

"Help him how?" Dean demanded. "You had him spy on us!"

"Come on, Dean," she said, completely ignoring the second part of his sentence. "You must have noticed how Purgatory changed him. I know he was unstable in the past... but I was shocked at how damaged he is now."

"Stop, okay?" Dean had had enough. "Don't try to make it sound like you were trying to help him, okay?"

"But I was," she said. "And now I want to help you."

"How can you possibly help me?" asked Dean skeptically.

"Yeah, you know, when you want to help people you don't poke their brothers in the eye," muttered Adam. Dean tugged on his jacket to shut him up – Naomi looked like she was resisting the urge to 'poke' him again.

"You may not admit it, Dean, but we're on the same side," she said softly, as if she was trying to convince him. "Getting the Angel Tablet, getting Castiel back, shutting the Gates of Hell... it's my job to protect Heaven. And I'll do anything."

"I don't trust Angels," Dean told her, "which means I don't trust you."

"And yet," she said, "you haven't warded this place against us. I know you still hold out hope that Castiel will return. And such loyalty is admirable, Dean. But Castiel is dangerous, and he's carrying an active hydrogen bomb around with him. Frankly, I'm scared."

"That's not my problem," Dean informed her.

Naomi changed tack. "I can help you, Dean."

"I reiterate – how?"

She looked satisfied as she said, "I see you've met with Ajay. Did you know that his way into Hell is through Purgatory?"

It seemed that the floor had fallen out from under Dean's feet. His little brother – in Purgatory. That dark, dangerous world, and Sam in it... it just seemed so wrong. And what if something happened to Sam in there–

"I knew you'd want to know," said Naomi with a little smile. "You see, we can be of help to each other."

And she was gone in a flap of wings.

Dean was frozen on the spot, staring at where she'd been a few seconds ago. Sam in Purgatory. The kid wasn't well, and he was unprepared, he had no idea what it was like in there. "Fuck," Dean whispered, staggering sideways and grabbing the table for support. "FUCK!"

"Dean," said Adam cautiously. "He'll be fine, he can look after himself–"

Dean spun around and seized Adam's shoulders. "No he won't, Adam! He doesn't know what it's like, he's never been there before! Fuck – we've got to get to Ajay, now! He needs to get Sam back out."

"But what about the trial?" asked Adam, bewildered.

"Screw the trial!" said Dean fiercely. "I don't care about any fucking trial if it means Sam's in danger of dying, Small Fry!"

"Okay," said Adam, shrugging Dean's hands off his shoulders. "Okay, Dean. Let's do this."

But Ajay was dead, and Dean's panic only increased. "FUCK!" he roared, his voice echoing in the empty alleyway. "FUCK!"

"Dean, there's gotta be another way!" said Adam desperately, reeling at the sight of Ajay's corpse. "There's gotta be a way!"

Dean was pacing up and down, tugging at his hair. "No no no, this can't be happening... not Sammy, not Sammy..."

"Dean, please!" pleaded Adam, coming to stand in front of him and effectively stopping his pacing. "Dean, you've got to calm down, Dean, please–"

Dean stopped short when he saw that there were tears in Adam's eyes. "Please, Dean," repeated Adam, his voice a whisper, "please. We've got to save Sam."

"There's one way," Dean told him with a sigh. "It's a last resort. It's the only thing I can think of."

"Then what are we waiting for?" asked Adam, grabbing Dean's shirt. "Let's go!"

Dean looked reluctant but also determined. "You don't have a problem with vampires, do you?"

Adam released Dean's shirt in surprise. "Vampires?"

Adam couldn't help recoiling at the sight of Benny. Dean had told him the vampire was harmless, and one of Dean's only friends, in fact, but he still couldn't help it. It was his first time coming face-to-face with a vampire and he half-expected Benny to pounce on him any minute.

"It's okay," Dean said softly to him. "He's not gonna hurt you."

"I know," answered Adam, but he clung nervously to Dean's arm anyway.

"Dean," greeted the vampire. "How you doing?"

Dean cut to the chase. "I need a favor, Benny. And it's a big one."

"Well, shoot."

Dean outlined his plan, while Adam listened in awe. It sounded grotesque, even for him (and he'd spent millennia having his definition of grotesque redefined). He almost expected Benny to refuse outright – he might have been a friend but it was too much to ask.

Benny whistled once Dean was done. "Wow. When Dean Winchester says he needs a favor, he's not screwin around."

"It's a pretty big favor, I know," Dean said, looking desperately hopeful. "But it's my brother, Benny."

Benny looked at Dean from under his hat. "This would be the same brother that wants to kill me, right?"

"Considering the other one's me and I'm harmless, yeah," confirmed Adam. Benny didn't seem so scary when he wasn't ripping people's throats out.

Benny grinned. "This your brother too?"

Dean nodded. "Yeah." He didn't divulge any more information, for which Adam was grateful. Benny might not be eating him but he sure wasn't comfortable with the vampire knowing too much about him.

"Okay, let me be clear on this," Benny said. "Your brother, who wants to kill me, is in Purgatory, and you want me to go get him. By gettin beheaded."

"I know it seems like a lot to ask," Dean said. He sounded an awful lot like he was begging. "But it's Sammy." An unspoken sentence seemed to pass between him and Benny.

"Please," added Adam, his voice uncharacteristically quiet, "he means a lot to both of us. We can't either of us survive without him."

Dean nodded. "I'm sorry, Benny," he said, his voice shaking. "I know it's a lot to ask, and I swear it's the last thing I ever wanted to do."

There was a moment's silence, and then Benny looked at Dean again. "Aw, hell. You know I love a challenge."

Dean almost didn't hear him right. "You're serious?!"

"Hey," said Benny. "He's your brother." Behind Dean, Adam relaxed an inch, and his grip on Dean's sleeve loosened. "I say let's do this."

Dean looked like a condemned man offered salvation. "I owe you," he told Benny, his throat dry from staggering relief.

Benny shook his head with a smile. "No you don't. Truth is – I could use a break from all this. I don't fit in, Dean." He looked so unbelievably sad. "Not with the vampires, and sure as hell not with the humans. I don't belong. And after a while... that starts to wear on you."

"It's really been that bad?" asked Dean, his tone dripping with guilt. He was always going to pick Sam over everyone else no matter what, but he couldn't deny, even to himself, that Benny's isolated existence and loneliness was his fault.

Benny smiled. "Cry me a river. Like you need to listen to this."

"Well, when you get back up here we're going to fix all that, you hear?" promised Dean. It was the least he could do for the man who'd saved him, and who was now willing to die to save his brother.

"When I get back?" Benny looked surprised.

"Yeah," said Dean fervently. "You find the portal and you hitch a ride with Sam, just like you did with me." Benny nodded uncertainly. "And as soon as you get back I'm hauling ass to Maine, and I will be there waiting for you when you get topside." Dean ended with a smile.

Benny nodded again, his smiling demeanor mysteriously vanishing. "Sounds like a plan, chief. Let's get on with it." He seemed to remember Adam was there, and asked, "Should the kid really see this, though?"

"I don't mind," Adam said quickly, before mentally slapping himself for how it sounded. Yeah of course I don't mind watching my brother behead you, how silly of me.

"I do," Dean said. "Adam, wait in the car."

"But, Dean!" Adam began, protesting.

Dean wasn't hearing it. "Car, Adam. Now."

Adam released Dean's sleeve and crossed his arms, taking a step away. "I don't want to," he said obstinately. "You said you were going to train me, Dean!"

"This isn't training!" Dean told him, his newfound patience with the kid waning. "This is something serious, this is about Sam, not you!"

"What difference does it make anyway?" shouted Adam, not caring that a very bemused Benny was watching the fight and occasionally trying to speak but being interrupted by an angry Winchester.

"There is a difference, Goddammit!" Dean yelled. "Now get in the bloody car!"

"No!" refused Adam shrilly. "I will not!"

"Fuck this," breathed Dean, livid, having reached the end of his already short tether. "Fuck it. You want to watch? FINE!" Without any warning he unsheathed his machete and swung it at Benny's head. The poor guy probably never saw it coming.

But when Benny's head rolled off his shoulders and his body collapsed, there was no one there to see it but Dean. Adam was gone. With a horrified intake of breath Dean noticed the spot that Adam had been standing in was extremely close to where Benny had stood.

And now both his brothers were in Purgatory.

I swear I didn't want to. I swear. The plot bunnies made me. I was helpless, okay.

On the other hand - MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA CLIFFHANGER! SUFFER, PEASANTS!

Sooo my life is now going upwards on the happiness scale, something I'm really grateful for, and for that reason this update happened a lot faster than even I predicted. On the other hand I am once again running out of reviews. Oh well.

Special thanks to SPNxBooworm, agent iz hyper, nupinoop296, angeleyenc, Lia Whyteleafe, RHatch89, kiwi, Dino-SOAR, CBloom2, and reannablue for reviewing the last two chapters (I forgot to do this last chapter. Oops).

I also made some art for this story - remymckwakker dot tumblr dot com / post / 59121504209/

Mylaptop'slowonbatterygottamakethisfast. I also have gotten myself a gym membership, to ready myself for the hunting life and/or the zombie apocalypse. And they have a swimming pool :D

Today's question - do you have a pet? If so, what animal is it?

I have a parrot called Guppy who's a tiny green shithead but also very cute and one of my best friends xD and there's this cat from the neighborhood that's sorta adopted us and I call it James. Also my dad might get me a German Shepherd puppy that I'm determined to name Snoop Dogg no matter what anyone says.

Waiting for your feedback, peasants ^_^

Czar out.