Everything Is Different Now
Chapter 12
March 30, 2013
"Good morning! How's my invalid today?"
"Feeling just peachy. See I told you I could heal fast. Now you might have to consider believing the
other stuff won't ya?"
"Alright, Jacob, I admit it. You have recovered from a broken arm, a broken leg and a dislocated hip
in less than 7 days and I am completely astounded. Your bruises and cuts are only memories and you
appear to be totally rebuilt. I'm impressed and I want to dive into a research study of what you are,
exactly."
"As long as you keep all your findings to yourself, you can study away. Test anything that you want.
I'm at your disposal. I'm all yours, Doc."
"I don't know when I've had a more agreeable patient. Maybe I can find out what makes you tick and
then bottle it and sell it. We'll be rich."
"I'm already rich. I'm here with you. Couldn't ask for anything better. There is nothing better."
"Sounds like you're leading up to a favor request. Let me guess, you want Marie to cater a party for
you and your new puppy, a welcome home affair."
"Hmm, that doesn't sound like a bad idea at all. But I wasn't leading up to anything like that. I don't
have any favors to ask of you other than the endless understanding you're already giving me. I just
have something I need to tell you."
"Okay, what is it?"
"Well, I'll tell ya, this isn't going to be a simple conversation. Perhaps we could grab a bite of lunch
and go for a walk outside. It seems like a nice day out there and I happen to know that my doctor
wants me to get plenty of exercise as physical therapy for my, um, recuperation?"
"Sounds good to me. You got a deal. You get dressed and we'll head for the kitchen."
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"Marie, we're going to have some snacks for lunch, some fruit and stuff. We'll be landing in the
sunroom okay?"
"Oh that'll be nice, Madam. I'll meet you there with drinks and such."
"Thanks Mama M. Come on Jacob; make yourself comfortable and I'll get this table cleared off."
"Let me help you, or Marie. I can't just sit here and let y'all wait on me."
"Of course you can. Doctor's orders, it's your first day out of bed and in spite of your amazing
progress; I don't want you to overdo it. Relax for a bit, build up you strength with some food and
we'll go for a short walk and talk. Any questions?"
"Are you so bossy cause you're a doctor, or did you become a doctor because you're naturally bossy?"
"I'll answer that with a question of my own. Do you want to take that walk on your own two feet?"
"Ah, I get it. Yes, ma'am."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~EIDN~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Boy, Marie can make a gourmet spread out of absolutely anything can't she? So that's her idea of
'snacks' huh?"
"Yep. That's our Mama Marie. Sometimes I go into the kitchen and watch her prepare stuff just to
make sure she's not pulling out a magic wand and conjuring food out of thin air. Now, let's go this
way. It'll take us over to one of the formal gardens with a path that then leads back to the koi pond.
That's a nice short circuit for you to start on and there are benches in the garden where you can rest if
you need to. Okay, Jacob, I'm dying of curiosity now, what do you need to tell me?"
"Well, Doc, it's more wolf stuff. You in the mood for listening to more legends?"
"Absolutely. I'll listen to anything you want to tell me. Anything. Anytime."
"That's one of the things that makes you so special and one of the reasons you're sort of involved in
what I have to tell you."
"Now you've really got me intrigued. You have my attention."
"Okay, here goes. One of the things that happens to some wolves after they have begun phasing is
they find their soulmate. You remember I told you about my connection to the offspring of the
vampires. Our Tribal records weren't very detailed or complete in the descriptions of this but we
figured out a good bit of stuff through experiences of some of my Pack."
"Your Pack?"
"Yeah, well, no, I guess not. Not anymore. I was Alpha of the Pack, that means the leader, before I
took off, so it USED to be my Pack but I guess it's someone else's now. My great-grandfather was
Alpha of the Pack of his generation and it's a bloodline thing."
"What about your father and grandfather? Were they Alphas too?"
"No there weren't Packs during their time. Ours was the first Pack we'd had since the time of my
great-grandfather."
"I see. Go on."
"Well, anyway, this soulmate thing, it's described as a gift from the Spirits and it's supposed to point
out to the wolf the person who would be their perfect match. Some of the Elders thought it was
meant to create a stronger bloodline of wolves; some thought it was just to make babies, to make sure
there were males available to become wolves if they were needed. Some just thought it was to help
the wolf find the person who could make him the happiest in life, you know, like a true love match."
"How does the wolf find this person?"
"Ah, that's a kinda freaky thing about it. Once the wolf has phased for the first time, when he meets
his perfect mate for the first time and looks into her eyes, it happens."
"It happens?"
"Yeah, when they look into each other's eyes, the wolf feels it. It's like a shift in his whole world.
Instead of gravity holding him to the earth, it's her that holds him here."
"The soulmate holds him down?"
"Hah! Good one! No, it's like she becomes the reason for his existence. She holds him steady in this
world. She gives him purpose and she completes him. She feels something too, just not as strong,
and if they are separated, it's painful, especially for the wolf. That was all the God-awful pain I was
having all those years in Portland."
"Because you were separated from your soulmate? The daughter?"
"Yeah, her. Right after she was born, I was gonna kill her because she was the reason Bella was
gonna be a vampire for eternity."
"You were going to kill your soulmate?"
"She wasn't my soulmate yet. Oh man, this sounds a lot worse than it is. Maybe this wasn't such a
good idea, Doc."
"No, please, Jacob, please continue. I'm completely interested in your story and this seems like
something I actually need to know."
"Yeah, you really do. That's why I'm sharing this secret with you. Anyway, yeah, I was gonna kill the
baby cause of what it did to Bella and because it was half vampire. When I got to the room where the
baby was, she looked up at me and when our eyes met, my world imploded."
"Your gravity shifted?"
"Exactly! And that was the worst thing that could have possibly happened to me."
"Why was that?"
"Well, many reasons. First, I'd always hated the idea of imprinting."
"Imprinting?"
"Yeah, that's what it's called when you get connected to your soulmate."
"You mean like imprinting like baby ducks and chicks and geese imprint on the first creature they see
after they hatch?"
"Huh?"
"Baby chicks, ducklings and goslings; 'attach' themselves to the first being they lay eyes on after they
hatch. It's supposed to be their mother, that's why when the mother moves, the babies all cluster up
right behind her and follow her everywhere she goes. It's called imprinting. Sometimes, if the eggs
were hatched in an incubator on a farm; instead of their mother the first thing the babies see after
they hatch is the farmer. I've seen big, burly men in overalls and rubber boots walking along with a
dozen or so baby ducks right behind them. Imprinting is not foolproof."
"No, it's not. That's amazing about the baby birds. That's a great description of imprinting, even for
wolves and soulmates."
"Okay, so you imprinted on the baby that Bella had and even though you didn't want to be, when you
were separated from her it caused you immense physical pain."
"Yeah, immense, that's a good word. See, I hated imprinting because it takes away your chance of
choosing for yourself. You don't get to meet someone and fall in love the normal way. You're just
forced together. The pair doesn't have to be together romantically though. The wolf will be whatever
his imprint needs him to be, whether it's a friend, a brother or a lover, but he'll always be her
protector, no matter what. But so far all of the wolves that imprinted in our Pack, the connection has
been romantic, except for Quil."
"Quil? The cousin you mentioned?"
"Yeah, poor sucker. He imprinted on a two-year-old little girl."
"TWO!"
"Yeah, that's what we all said. Here's the thing, though. As long as the wolf continues to phase, he
doesn't age, so Quil can stay where he is until Claire catches up to him. But of course, he feels
compelled to be around her as much as possible and by the time she gets old enough and catches up
to him, he's gonna absolutely be her big brother, maybe."
"Maybe."
"Yeah, there's the really sucky part. He won't know what she'll need him to be until she grows up. So
if there's a chance that she needs him to be a boyfriend instead of a brother, he's gotta wait for her.
He could date, but he doesn't dare get serious about any girl he meets for at least the next 15 years or
so."
"I begin to see why you hate imprinting. But, about the baby, you said you had the horrible pain
when you were away from her."
"I did. You see, I freaked out and ran off when I realized I was tied by the Spirits to this hybrid
demon spawn and while I was away from her, I hurt so bad it was ridiculous. I hadn't even gone wolf
yet and was in so much pain already because of the whole fucked up situation and I was so far away
before I realized the pain was because of the separation and was never gonna let up as long as I was
away from her, I was practically incapacitated and I couldn't get back. Then there was the accident in
my car. Then my second bunch of injuries that landed me in the hospital was what I got while trying
to drag myself back to Forks and then before I could manage to get back, the vampires had all left,
taking my imprint with them.
"Hell, Jacob, they took your imprint away without telling you or anything?"
"They didn't know I'd imprinted on her. Only one member of my Pack knew and he promised not to
tell."
"And that's why you were in non-stop pain for 7 years."
"That was the reason. It wasn't long before I was asylum-bound. I really was crazy."
"What happened?"
"What?"
"You're not in pain any more. You said it stopped."
"Yeah, about that. That's actually what I needed to tell you. I just had to tell you that whole other
story so you'd understand."
"Understand what, Jacob?"
"That day you first came to see me in Portland, when I was all trussed up like a Christmas turkey?"
"Yes, I remember."
"Do you remember that when you first came into my room, you sat in a chair where I couldn't see
your face?"
"Yes, I remember. The administrator made me do that."
"Really? Why?"
"Because you were so violent, they didn't want me to make eye contact with you. They were afraid it
might set you off and you might hurt yourself struggling against the restraints."
"Oh, I see. Well, I can't say they were wrong. I was pretty upset that day, I don't even remember
what about. What I do remember is how soft and gentle your voice was and how all I wanted to do
was lie there and listen to you talk. But the main thing in all this is, now, don't freak out, okay? The
main thing that day was, when you got up and walked over to my side and I looked into your eyes, the
imprint on the hybrid baby broke."
"Broke?"
"Yeah, it...let me go. I felt these steel cables that had been wrapping around me and tying me to her
just fall away and all the pain went away at that same instant."
"Well, that's wonderful news, Jacob. Why do you suppose that happened?"
"That's what I'm actually working up to telling you. I felt the imprint on the baby break when I
looked into your eyes; and the imprint re-settled itself...on you."
"ME?"
"Please don't freak out. Please don't run away or make me leave. I have to be near you. If we're
apart the pain comes back. It'll kill me if you make me go."
"Jacob, calm down. I'm not freaking out. Look, this is me not running away and not making you
leave. I've already told you I'd never make you leave for any reason. I have no intention whatsoever
of asking you to leave this estate. Why do you think the imprint reverted to me?"
"I've been thinkin' about that. I think maybe if imprinting really is the Spirit's way of pointing us
toward our soulmates, that maybe they had a chance to decide they'd made a mistake. I know that
sounds crazy, but hell, Laura, my whole life sounds crazy. I've sort of learned to accept anything at
this point."
"Jacob, is that why you had the spell of pain when I came back here to make preparations for your
move?"
"That's exactly what caused that."
"You seem pretty sure."
"It started the moment you walked out the front door of the building and got in that taxi. I was
watching you from the window of my room. It felt like my heart was being squeezed by a big fist and
my whole body was on fire. It brought me to my knees and I stayed hunched over right there. They
strapped me down to the bed again. Didn't matter much though cause I was unable to move until the
moment 4 days later when you got out of another taxi in front of my window."
"Jacob, how are you feeling right now? Are you getting a little tired?"
"Maybe a little, but we don't have to go back."
"I think we do. I want you to go back to your wing and get some rest."
"Do I have to go back to the west side? Couldn't I stay on your end for a while?"
"Will it hurt you if you go to your own room?"
"It's not exactly pain, just a really uncomfortable feeling, kinda like nerves and claustrophobia I
guess. I'm sorry. I'm bein' a wimp. I'll just go on back to my room."
"Absolutely not. You'll come to my room with me right now. I want you to get some sleep before
tonight."
"Before tonight? What's happening tonight?"
"You're going to phase for me. I want to see your wolf."
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March 30, 2013
9:00 P.M.
"Come on in, Jacob. It's okay. I hope this isn't going to make you too uncomfortable."
"No, I don't think I'll be uncomfortable. But you might be. I'll try to keep to myself."
"What do you mean?"
"Well,...this isn't going to sound right but I'm just gonna say it...physical contact helps calm the
wolf. If he's agitated for any reason, the imprint can sort of 'tame' him with just a touch."
"Well, if that's what it takes for you to rest, then come on over here. Come to this side of the bed.
Kick off your shoes. What else do you need to, ah...shed to be comfortable?"
"This is gonna make you uneasy, I can tell. Let's just forget this Laura. I can rest in my own room."
"Jacob? I think perhaps this is your room now."
"Really? I mean, would you be okay with that?"
"I could grow accustomed to it I think. Didn't you say the object of the imprint feels a connection
also?"
"Yes. They do. That supposedly helps the pair, um...connect? Hook up? Are you feeling
something, Laura? For me, I mean?"
"I don't know. I'm not sure how to describe it. There's something there that otherwise wouldn't be or
shouldn't be. I'm trying to keep an open mind here. This is all pretty new and strange."
"I understand. If there's something there, then that's great. It'll give us a starting point. Is that okay
with you? We can take this as slow as you need ya know?"
"Okay. I'm on board, but maybe slow would be wise. Will you be okay with that? It won't hurt you
will it?"
"No, I don't think so. Just being able to be near you will make all the difference in the world. It
already feels pretty special to me but I'm trying to behave myself, if you know what I mean."
"I think I have a pretty good idea. Thank you. Please try to be patient with me."
"Hah! Did you see what you did there? Be 'patient' with me? Good one Doc."
"Yeah, I'm glad you can laugh. At least for now. Will you get some sleep now?"
"Aren't you going to rest too?"
"Probably, in a bit. I'll stretch out here on the loveseat."
"No, Doc. Not a good idea. I won't put you out of your own bed. Just get comfy, kick off your shoes
and whatever else strikes your fancy and...come lay with me."
"I'm not sure..."
"Please? I won't bite. I promise."
"Oh...well...okay. But..."
"What?"
"I have very active elbows, I'm a blanket hog, and I've been told I talk in my sleep, a lot."
"Okay. I'm sure I can survive the elbows, I don't need the blankets, 108.9 over here and the other one
sounds really entertaining. Come on, pile in, it's a sleepover."
"Alright, but you've been warned."
"Deal. I should warn you, I'm a snuggler and a hugger. And I'm your own personal space heater so
the blankets may be overkill."
"Fair enough. I stand warned."
"Good. Shoes off, climb in, now face that way and scootch up against me. Aw yeah, that feels good
doesn't it? God, Laura, you smell so fuckin' amazing."
"Well, thank you and yes this does feel good. Strange but good."
"Strange?"
"I've never actually shared this intimate a space with anyone before."
"What about your husband? Whups, I'm sorry, that's really none of my business."
"No it's okay. He wasn't a...snuggler, or a hugger. He slept in a separate bedroom most of the
time. It was a sleeping quirk of his, like my elbows and sleep-talking I suppose."
"Didn't you guys...I mean when you got married...I mean...um?"
"We consummated the marriage if that's what you're asking. But there wasn't much closeness after
that and he was off on the racing circuit pretty soon after the honeymoon. Then there was...the
accident."
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring up painful stuff from the past."
"It's okay. I'm better these days. It's been a long time."
"Do you mind telling me how it happened?"
"No, I don't think it would bother me. He was leading in a race in Monte Carlo. It was those big
boats that some people call 'cigarette racers' but they're really called Class 1 Powerboats and he was a
really good driver. Those boats take two people to run them. There's a driver and then there's a
throttle man who does all the adjustments on the engines. Some of those boats had something like
2400 horsepower. I think that's pretty high."
"Wow, you bet it is."
"Well, anyway, the rest of the story is simple. They were in the lead, they were wide open and they hit
a wake in the water. They went airborne and the boat virtually disintegrated on impact. My husband
Pierre and his throttle man Maurice were both killed instantly."
"I'm so sorry, Laura. My mother was killed in a car accident so I sort of understand."
"How old were you?"
"I was 11. And you? You were 18?"
"It was the day before my 19th birthday."
"Oh honey. I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have made you talk about this."
"No Jacob. It's okay. Really. It doesn't feel so sharp with you here. Is that the imprint?"
"Yeah, probably. Whatever the source, I'll always be here for you. Whatever you need me to be.
Even if it's just as a space heater."
"That's one task for which you seem extremely well suited."
"It comes in handy now and then. Um...Laura, could I put my arms around you? May I hold you?"
"I think that would be okay."
"Just let me know if you're uncomfortable with any of this. Alright? Promise?"
"I will, Jacob. Promise. It feels pretty nice so far. You're a good snuggler."
"Thanks. I do my best."
"Sleep now. You have a demonstration in a few hours. I want you to be rested in case it proves
difficult for you to do."
"Yes, ma'am. I hope it won't be too hard. The wolf really wants to come out and meet you."
"Well that's just going to make me nervous. Stop that."
"Yes, ma'am. Goodnight, Laura."
"Goodnight, Jacob."