xxPUDDxx - yeah kinda dreading going back to school, but at least its my last year and i'm not stuck in chemistry (my worst subject) anymore so its a bit better than previous years! and I KNOW! two weeks to go for the first one, which i'm going to! i'm ridiculously excited! its going to be AMAZING!

510 Dannys POV

Waking up and seeing the tear tracks on little Dougie face made me feel so much more guilty for even thinking about sending Tom away somewhere. It was just that... I was scared, that I wouldn't be able to look after Tom for much longer. If he got any worse, I wasn't going to be able to handle him, he was only just controllable now, when he was in one of his freak out moments, I could only just handle him and calm him down. The rest of the time, Tom was mostly fine, but I was terrified that he would wander off and get himself hurt again, or he was just going to suddenly flip, or say the most random of things, that scared me to the core. It wasn't like what he said sometimes had anything to do with what we were talking about, it could be silent and all of a sudden, Tom would randomly say something, it was scary, to even think of what was going on in that troubled head of his.

I guessed thats what scared me the most, what was going on inside his head, what he was thinking about, what he head was telling him. Tom spent a lot of time inside his own head, it could have been telling him anything. So when Tom whimpered, I panicked a little, then realised that he was probably just waking up, and let him carry on, knowing just how much he didn't exactly enjoy waking up. "morning Tommy, feeling any better yet?" I asked quietly, watching Tom open his beautiful brown eyes. I didn't get a reply, didn't really expect one, but I did get Tom turning to cuddle into my chest, holding onto my tshirt. "I'll take that as a yes, now I think its time we got up, don't you?" I picked Tom up and took him to the bathroom, starting up the usual routine.

I ran the bath to a perfect temperature, got Tom undressed, his towel on the radiator to warm up (so he didn't get cold before he got dressed again), put Tom in the bath, and was about to get in myself (because ever since the last time I got in with him, he found that he liked being close during bath time) when Tom stopped me. "no!" Tom shoved me away, pulling his knees to his chest, like he was protecting himself. "why not Tommy? Don't you want me to get in with you today?" I asked, kneeling by the tub, stroking Toms face. "not icky!" Tom answered, sounding more like he was in the middle of an argument than anything. "I know you're not icky. You're my Tommy, you're beautiful." I replied, not sure why he seemed to think this was an argument.

"not, no!" Toms head fell into his hands, but he wasn't crying, it was more like he was hiding. "calm down Tom, its alright. Lets just have a bath and get ready for today, yeah?" I grabbed the sponge, smothering it in soap, going to start running it over his arm. "no! No! No touching!" Tom pushed me away, whimpering quietly. He looked so scared, I had no idea of what though. "huh? Tommy, whats up? Whats wrong? Why don't you want to be touched?" I was confused, Tom never usually had a problem with me touching him. He had wanted to hug earlier, why had he changed his mind? Was it because he was naked now...but he had been fine with that yesterday, and the past few weeks! Oh god, please don't tell me he was getting self conscious again, it would rip me to shreds to know he was struggling with his looks again.

"Tom, you're beautiful, don't be so worried about being touched, please. Its okay to be touched, its been okay up until now, hasn't it? Just let me do this and we'll get you dressed and warm again." I sighed, wanted to stop this before it developed even more, feeling so guilty for thinking about the thought of sending Tom away to get help. But, if he did fall back into being self conscious then I guessed that I would have to do it, to stop him from being so unhappy, like he looked right now. "don't want... don't like...no!" Tom whimpered, starting to shiver weakly. "okay, okay, no more bath time. Its best you get dressed right now." I carefully pulled him out of the bath, wrapping him in towels, drying him off and dressing him in the clothes he picked, feeling the shivers calm down.

511 Toms POV

Thats it, hide yourself, you look icky! Everyone will run away if you look icky! I didn't want to look icky, I didn't want anyone to see me while I looked icky. "feel better now? All warm and everything?" Danny asked, starting to rub my hair with a fluffy thing. Why is he doing this? Do it yourself! Lazy! I liked Danny rubbing my hair, I felt sleepy when he did it, he made me feel good. I wasn't lazy, I just liked it. Answer him then, say yes. "yes." I did as I was told, I wanted to be a good boy, that was all, just a good boy. "good, thats good. Come here, you look like you need a hug." Danny warmed me up with his body, letting me lean on him. He wont when he finds out you're icky. But...he had seen me for a long time, and he didn't care.

"stop shivering Tommy, its okay, you're alright. I'm right here." Danny said so quietly, his lips pressing against my cheek, hugging me so tight. He'll leave you. Listen to me, he'll leave you. Its not alright. Who was speaking? No-one else was here! I didn't want them talking to me! I didn't want to be talked to by this person! Couldn't they go away? Why did they follow me everywhere I went? When could I be left alone? And why was I now in another room? Why was now sitting in the table instead of on the bed? Why? I didn't understand! "Tom, you need your vitamins, open wide." Danny appeared, holding up two white things, and a glass filled with something brown.

"go on, I made you a peanut butter smoothie, to help you swallow them." Danny smiled a little, but it wasn't real, he didn't look happy. Take them, make him happy, do it. Don't make him waste his time. I took them, swallowing the white pills, drinking the brown liquid. It tasted good, really nice. "there you go, I'm proud of you Tommy." Danny sat with me, his arms going around my middle. My tummy scrunched up when he did, it felt funny, but a good funny. I liked it when I got hugs, it always made my tummy go funny. "funny tummy." I said quietly like Danny did, leaning on him, wanting to be close.

"good funny tummy or bad funny tummy?" Danny asked, his hand running up and down my side. "good." I answered, it felt like a good funny tummy, not like when I ate, or when I was in the bath. "thats good, don't want bad funny tummies, do we?" Danny laughed a little, taking my empty glass from me and moving us to another room, onto a squishy thing. Now Danny was smiling, with a good smile. He moved closer to me, his hands going to my sides, his smile was getting wider and wider. And then he tickled me! I made a weird sound, laughing at it, it tickled a lot! And Dannys smile got even bigger! His hands tickled me again and now he didn't stop! I screamed and laughed, trying to get out of his arms, but I couldn't! I was stuck!

"no! No! It tickles!" I laughed, I couldn't stop! "make me stop Tommy!" Danny didn't stop tickling me, pulling me to him more. "stop, stop!" I cried, feeling water run down my cheeks. This time it wasn't sad either, it was happy! It was happy water, I didn't feel sad at all! The person had stopped talking too! It was only me and Danny, no person saying bad things!