xxPUDDxx - *hands tissue* and thank you! and i know i'm so excited, but because i recently moved i currently don't know where my tickets are! i've got 4 days to find them, and i'm panicking because i don't have a clue where they are! and i've come down with a bad cold, so i'm hoping its cleared up by the time my gig comes up!

518 Dannys POV

I stood by the kitchen counter, watching the microwave heat up Toms dinner, taking a few minutes to breathe. I knew I was being ridiculous today, but I couldn't help it, around this time, two years ago, Tom was either preparing to run away or already had. While at the same time, I was using our time off to go out and book a nice holiday for the two of us to Disneyland, so we had a nice, four day weekend to ourselves, so I could give Tom his key and ask him to move in with me. And now, two years later, I was stood here, remembering the whole thing, knowing that in just a few months, Tom wouldn't be living here anymore. Unfortunately, he wouldn't be living at mine either, he was going away, to a psychiatric ward, and there was nothing I could do about it. Apart from lie to him and say that everything was fine and happy, that Tom was staying with us. Say that I loved him and that I wasn't going to let him go, at least I wasn't lying about saying I loved him, that would always be true, no matter what Tom did.

Suddenly, I felt hoodie covered arms slid over my shoulders hesitantly and a warm little blonde head leant against mine. "hey Tommy." I smiled, realising who had come up for a cuddle, for the first time in forever...wait, that was a sign of improvement, wasn't it? Could Tom actually be getting better? This was a sign he was getting better surely! Maybe he wouldn't have to be sent away after all! No, I had to stop those thoughts right now, or I would wimp out and never make Tom go, because he certainly needed it. I pushed all thoughts out of my mind and reached up to hold onto Toms arms, leaning back into his neck, needing to feel his arms around me and fool myself into believing that nothing had happened to us, that we were still a happy couple with no worries.

The microwave pinged before I could say anything, so I took out mine and Toms meals, plating them up for us, reluctantly moving out of Toms hold so I could sit him down with his food on the table. Luckily, he ate it without complaint (doubling his dose of medication seemed to have helped him overcome whatever was bothering him) leaving me to finish my own, which was when I realised exactly what we were eating. Both me and Tom had been eating meat feast pizzas...exactly like we had been when Tom disappeared... my hunger vanished quicker than Tom did, I felt sick just remembering that day, remembering coming into Toms house and finding that d*mn note on his bed, seeing how the paper was still damp from his tears.

Flashback 20th September 2010

"hey Tommy, I've run out of food, do you mind if I take some of yours?" I called, walking through the front door casually, knowing that my boyfriend wouldn't mind if I took something. "Tom? You in here?" I called again, after getting no answer to the first call. I didn't get one again, worrying me. "Tom? Honey? Where are you?" I called for the third time, wandering around the strangely tidy house, finding no-one. There was something wrong, something was very, very wrong. The house was too quiet, there wasn't a sound coming from it, things were missing too. I couldn't think of the things missing, but there was defiantly things missing.

"Tom? You're worrying me, where are you?" I shouted, getting a bit panicky. Toms house was never pristinely tidy, and at the moment, it was pristine. Things were missing and it was silent, something was wrong, so very, very wrong! I ran up the stairs, checking every room, bursting into Toms bedroom last. This was the only room with things still on the floor, my clothes. Some of my clothes were on the floor, exactly where I had left them a few days ago. But none of Toms clothes were here. They were all mine. The bed was made too, something that never happened, it was actually made, with new clean sheets, all tucked in and looking like a hotel bed than anything else.

There was a white rectangle on the bed too, breaking up the Power Rangers. I picked it up, it was an envelope, addressed to me, Harry and Dougie. Inside was a letter, which was written out, things crossed out all over the place, smudges over some words. The page was damp in patches, clearly where water drops had fallen onto it...what the hell was this? I read the letter and my heart shattered inside my chest, somehow starting to pound painfully at the same time, tears falling down my face rapidly, the only thing I could do as shock kept me rooted to the spot.

Flashback end

519 Toms POV

After I finished eating my dinner, I cuddled up to Danny, letting him hug me, his head next to mine. My face started getting wet, and Danny started moving, he was crying! "you're crying!" I turned round to look at him, why was Danny crying?! "huh? No I'm not!" Danny lied, wiping at his face. "you are!" I put my hand on his cheek, feeling that it was wet. "I'm not Tommy, I'm not crying. Its fine, don't worry." Danny took my hand away, more water falling down his face. You caused this, he's crying because of you! Why would be crying because of me? I hadn't done anything to him! You always make him cry. Every time he cries, its because of you.

But why? How? What did I do? I had been good today! I thought I was good today! "you didn't do anything Tommy, you've been such a good boy today." Danny stood up with me, holding me. Your fault still. But why? I didn't do anything, why was Danny crying?! "no, why? Why?" I asked, I wanted to know why! "okay, Tommy, do you remember a few years ago? When you went away for a little while?" Danny asked, I did a little. I was in a car, and it was cold, that was it. "well, its exactly two years since that happened, and it upsets me a little, thats all. I missed you, so much, I love you Tommy, I don't want you to do that again. And remembering isn't very nice, thats all." Danny said, water falling down his face even more, he held onto me even tighter. Told you, it was your fault.

"oh, sorry." I said quietly, feeling bad. "its okay Tommy. Don't worry about it. I'll get over it, just ignore me, alright?" Danny pressed his lips to my face, pulling me closer. "you're sad." I wiped the water away on his face. "and I'll get over it Tommy, calm down okay? Its going to be fine, it'll be okay. Just let me cuddle today, alright? Just let me cuddle. I'll be fine." Danny smiled a little, hugging me so tight, it hurt. It made my chest tight, I couldn't breathe!

"ow!" I whined, pushing him a little. It hurt! "sorry! Sorry Tommy! I didn't mean to hold you that tight! Sorry baby, I didn't mean it. I just miss you." Danny let go a little, but keeping me to his chest, "oh, you need your vitamins again, come on we better get them before you feel icky again." I was pulled away, fed my vitamins again. I felt sleepy after I had them, it didn't feel good. But, the person who was telling me I made Danny cry stopped talking. And I got more cuddles, so it was nice. I liked being cuddled, and now it was Dannys and the two other people who talked to me were here too! I was warm, so warm, it was so nice, I liked it.

Danny was hugging me most, so I hugged him back too, he was so warm. He was still crying a little, but he was talking and smiling, so I think he was fine. "I love you Tommy...you'll stay here...you wont be leaving." Danny said, other things were said, but I couldn't hear him. "no, you're not leaving, you wont be leaving." The yellow haired boy said too, pushing into my middle, pulling on my shirt. "no, you wont. I'll hold you forever Tommy, I love you." Danny cried.