I missed the train. Yes. YES, I missed the train going from Acalypha. Okay, so I didn't TECHNICALLY miss it, but I woke up and arrived at the train station two hours before the next train even arrived, so I decided to walk. Hence why I at the moment balanced on the railway, balancing since that particular activity always had worked as a distraction to get my mind off things. So what if I then ended up seeing less of my green surroundings or the blue sky. What did I care?
The sky wasn't blue today either. Churning clouds would've met me had I raised my gaze from the tracks. Churning clouds that darkened the day and promised lots of rain, and soon. As soon as the thought of rain emerged in my head once more, a large drop fell from the skies and landed right in front of me. I looked at it in fascination, how it exploded upon impact with the ground and made a little circle where it was. Then its companions started to land beside it. More and more. Before I knew it it was pouring down, and I was soaking wet in no time at all. I had stopped walking without noticing when I saw that first droplet, and now moved my gaze up at the sky, finally.
What would it feel like, falling from the skies, joined by millions, no billions of others? Falling through the air, knowing that the end awaited all the way down here. How would it feel to merge with the others then, in puddles, ponds, rivers, or even the ocean? Would it be nice, being so close to each other? Would it be worth the pain of landing upon such a hard world? Was that what it was.. to be close to someone? Sharing the pain?
With a downpour like this, it was almost as if the earth and the sky was merged together by millions of super fine strings. That thought made me think of my Mother. Were we connected, somehow, through the billions of little droplets? Believing so made me smile, and then laugh as I started running in the rain, jump in puddles on my way, the deeper, the better. HE would never approve of this unladylike behavior, and it made it all the more fun. SHE would laugh at me. Giggle, and call me silly, but let me do as I pleased.
For now I felt closer to her through the million tears from the skies that made earth and heaven one, and for that I would do anything to make her laugh. My mother deserved to laugh, after all.
A sound made me stop again though. The sound of.. a train. I looked behind me, and sure enough, there it was, approaching rapidly, its destination right through me where I stood in the middle of its path. It hooted, the driver clearly aware that I was there, but not about to stop when I just as easily could move aside. Easier, really. But I stood still, legs firmly planted into the ground. If I was hit by a train, would that resemble the impact a raindrop experienced as it landed on the ground?
If I just stood here, the train would undoubtedly hit the target, and I would undoubtedly end. My blood would leave me, seep into puddles and merge with the thousands of drops that had already become one. Then, at last, I would be one of many, instead of one standing by many. The path to my mother was already open. All it required.. was standing here. It was that simple. I didn't need to do anything at all. The train hooted again, approaching so very very fast. 10 seconds. It looked so much faster from where I stood compared to when I had been sitting in it. 5 seconds. Four. Three.. two...
My mothers face appeared before me, almost as she was really there, her face seeming.. sad. I moved out of the way just as the train came upon me, just managed avoiding the collision between the two of us. The wind blew my hair back as wagon after wagon passed screeching over the rails I had been balancing on. Even after the train had passed, I remained seated on the wet ground, staring ahead with wide eyes. What was that exactly? Had I..?
Soon the cold started to catch up on me, so I hauled myself up on my feet, started walking by the tracks once more. As the minutes passed some of my former good returned, and I took to balancing on the tracks again. I did not encounter any more trains before I arrived in Magnolia.
By the time I arrived at Magnolia station, however, some of the joy of the rain HAD left me, slowly giving way for hypothermia. I guess I should've thought about the fact that I owned nothing except what I had on my body, and that really wasn't all that much. A pair of shorts, some boots that were all but waterproof, though soaking wet like the rest of me at the moment, and that black t-shirt of mine that was decorated with a bright yellow star. Oh, and my keys. They could hardly be forgotten. I still danced along the trap, humming on some unknown melody while a smile played in the corner of my mouth. I ascended onto the actual platform and shook my hair, much like a wet cat, and without it helping me much.
I saw him then, Natsu Dragneel, the idiot with the scarf, sleeping on a bench at that station. It was early-ish, as in not so early that it would be dark, but not quite the hour when anyone would be at the station. No trains where scheduled to arrive anytime soon, so I wondered what the boy was doing here. Slowly I made my way over, bowed down so our heads were somewhat on the same level, studied his peaceful sleeping face. For being a damaged kid he surely didn't look like it, at least not at the moment.
"Ah, he's been here all morning, that poor kid." a voice called, and I turned to see the ticket lady give me a warm smile. I had bought my train ticket with her last night. A nice lady, a bit chubby but in a way that suited her. She could be placed around forty, perhaps fifty years of age, and had dark brown hair. She wore a ticket-hat, if there was anything called that at all, and a matching uniform to go with it, complete with a business-ish skirt that reached just below her knees. Blue. A lot of uniforms were blue, really. I righted myself up, smiled back and tilted my head slightly to the side.
"Do you know why he's here?" I asked, since she was likely to know,m the woman. Ticket ladies often knew quite a bit about quite a lot, especially in semi-small stations such as this one.
"He said something about waiting for someone named Luigi," the woman replied, and I sent the boy a look. Who was Luigi? I hadn't heard of anyone named that at the guild. Had this Luigi been on some mission of sorts, perhaps.
"I'm pretty sure he meant Lucy, though, the newest member of Fairy Tail. That'd be you, I'm pretty certain," the woman added, and I turned back to her, looking at her and wondering how..?
"News travels fast in this town, darling, especially when concerning that guild. You ought to wake up that boy and get the two of you somewhere warm soon, 'cause I get cold just looking at you." she sent me a another smile and then returned to her ticket booth. I guess.. she was right. Any more time spent in my current condition and I would find myself with pneumonia in no time at all. So I leaned forward once more, my head on an equal level as his.
"Natsu. Oi, Natsu. I'm back. Mama says hi," I said. No response. Ugh. Heavy sleeper, eh? I moved a hand in front of his face. Flickered his forehead. As if hit by a jolt of lightning he got up so fast I stumbled backwards and landed on my butt. Not that it mattered, I was so full of mud already that some dust from the ground hardly mattered.
"WHA.. Oh." he spotted me on the ground, eased up his battle stance and reached out a hand for me instead. I took it, and he yanked me to my feet. He didn't stop there though, just took hold of my waist and lifted me over his shoulder like a bag of potatoes, and he did it with such ease I'd almost thought I weighed next to nothing. He held my legs in place firmly, my head and upper body hanging over his shoulder.
"HEY! What do you think you're DOING!?" I yelled out in protest, but he merely started walking instead.
"Mira almost killed me this morning, you know, when I told her you went off on your own." he merely said, stopped for a moment at the entrance of the station when he noticed the bad weather. Only for a moment though, before he set off running for the guild. Man, could he run. The world flew by so swiftly, and I had no time at all to protest any more before we found ourselves within the halls of Fairy Tail. There he put me down firmly, sent me an unsmiling and a bit annoyed glance before he headed for the bar.
"There. I brought her back." he declared, and I stood in the entrance, soaked to the bone and the center of everyones attention. It made me want to run again. Run and hide far away where no one would be looking. Had it really been the best choice to step aside when the train was about to run me over?
"Oh, you POOR POOR thing! You must be freezing, come here," Mira was upon me in an instant, all drinks and patrons forgotten as she dragged me into a shower room, stripped me down and shoved me into a scorching hot shower to warm up while she found me something warm not to speak of DRY clothing to wear while the ones I had been wearing were sent off to be washed and dried. I felt somewhat assaulted. Kidnapped at the train station, robbed of my clothes and forced to wash up. The only thing missing now would be me being sold off to the highest bidder at some slavers market.
I emerged clean, warm, and dressed in long, black sweatpants and a grey singlet. It made me feel funny being dressed like this, but it wasn't like I had a choice or anything. It was this, or coming out naked. And if I came out naked, I would most likely be ushered off somewhere else again. So really, I didn't have much of a choice.
"There you are. You must be starving. Come here, I'll prepare something for you. What do you like," Mira was by my side the instant I came out of the shower room, ushered me off to the bar area where I sat down.
"Uhm. I'm sort of.. broke." I muttered, didn't look her in the eyes. Perhaps had that been another reason as to why I had chosen to walk rather than take the train.
"That doesn't matter. I'll put it on your tab, so what.."
"No." I protested then, cut the silver-haired beauty off. No debt. I would NOT acquire debt.
"I think I'll rather go on a job. I need some money anyways, for different stuff." I got up, was about to walk over to the mission board when a hand held me back by grabbing mine.
"I'll pay for her meal. Put it on my tab," the voice of Natsu declared, and I sent him a look.
"Only paying you back for the meal in Hargeon." he said, looked away. Mirajane squealed. What.. just happened?
"Okay, so now when that's taken care of, what do you want, Lucy?" she turned to me, and I.. hesitated. Technically he DID owe me a meal, but.. I felt scared, all of a sudden. Scared that I would be rejected. Scared that I wouldn't get rejected, only to... BOOM. The doors to the guild opened with great force. They seemed to be doing that quite often, so not too many of the guild really paid much attention to it. I however, still jumped a bit and looked at the entrance where three men in black suits entered.
"Lucy." one of them stated simply, and I felt myself pale.
"What?" I asked, my voice shrilling. Damn. What NOW?! The man that had uttered my name was before me in five large strides, and the moment later the hall reflected the sound as he slapped me in the face so hard I almost got beaten to the floor. Silence followed, and I forced my gaze back on the man that so openly had assaulted me.
"That is no way for you to speak to me," the man said in his strict voice.
"I am not inclined to speak to you at all. So. What does he want?" I asked in a cold voice, trembling with the treacherous tears that threatened to spill over had I not held them back. I knew that HE wanted something.
"HE wishes to see you." the man said, and though it sounded like a mere wish, I knew that it was nothing of the sort. HE was only steps from DEMANDING my presence, and the only reason I knew that he didn't demand it already would be that these men had yet to haul me along against my will.
"I refuse." I said lowly.
"What?" he said, his voice threatening. I took a shaky breath.
"I said. I REFUSE. Now leave." I demanded. The man seemed to be ready to strike me again, and I sensed Natsu shifting in his position next to me. The man sensed it too, and lowered his hand.
"As you wish, but as soon as he receives these news I can not account for any further action he takes." he said, his voice hard. I sent him a glare.
"Who do you think knows him better? YOU, or ME?" I said, and he nodded, left with his two companions. Finally I dared let my hand stroke over the injured cheek. That would leave a bruise. That would DEFINITELY leave a bruise. And HE wanted something. Great. Another suitor, perhaps? The silence prolonged after their departure, before finally someone dared to speak up.
"What was that about?" Master asked. He had, without me noticing, moved behind me, and now looked at me with serious eyes. Had I seen Master before? Oh yeah. Briefly upon my arrival.
"That was nothing. Just.. some people I know." I said, finally headed for the notice board. I stood there for some time, staring ahead, not really reading any of the requests. It wasn't before everything went blurry that I realized that I had stopped holding the tears at bay. They now flowed down freely, making my shoulders shake ever so slightly and wetting the floor beneath me. I swallowed a sob, tried stopping them, but it was really too late to hold it back now. I was scared. Scared because these people had seen this display and now might end up asking unwanted question. And scared because of HIM. For he was back, and HE knew where I was.
"So.. what kind of mission are you looking for?" Natsu asked. He had walked over to the board as well, stiffened slightly when he saw my tears but otherwise acted as if nothing was wrong. I didn't know what mission I wanted. I just wanted to get out of here. Far away, away from everything that was threatening and scary. From the suffocating grasp HE had over me.
But I couldn't do that. Not yet. I was Lucy of Fairy Tail, at least for now. That was why I dared oppose him this time around. I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and forced the tears back, back into the darkness deep within. They could come out later, when I was alone, but not now. So I opened my eyes, dried away the tears, and took a good look at the missions before me. I found one, a seemingly simple one. Even better yet, the starting point was in Acalypha. Then I plastered a smile on my face, filled my mind with another bout of determination and returned to Mira. It would be visible, the trace of my tears, but I ignored the look she sent me, handed the request to Master instead. He approved, and I left.
Through the doors. Out into the rain. The rain that had made me giggle and laugh only hours prior. How much things could change in the manners of minutes.
"So, what's this mission about?" Natsu asked, suddenly by my side, that cat of his landing on my head. Still silent, but at least he acknowledged my existence now.
"Helping an old lady move out. It'll only be lifting some boxes around, I guess, so it'll be done in a few hours." I replied.
"Sweet! There's this new restaurant I've been dying to try out!" he declared, and I stopped suddenly.
"You're not coming." I said, not even bothering to smile. He had his hands on the back of his head, his elbows elevated into the air.
"Who said you had a say in this?" he asked, not seemingly caring.
"I do, since I picked the mission for me!" I said, pointing at me to make my point clear.
"Who said I had a say, then? Look, I don't like you,and you don't like me, but Mira almost killed me for not bringing you home yesterday like she said, and she seems absolutely certain that you don't got a place to stay, so I'm here to make certain you get home or whatever tonight." he said, and started walking again. I followed, slightly surprised by that speech of his.
"Wait, you don't like me?" I asked.
"Nope."
"... Why not?"
"You smile too much," he declared then.
"And that is a bad thing?" I asked.
"It is when you don't mean it. Why DO you smile so much anyways?"
"Wh says I don't mean it?"
"I do. You were crying earlier, then pretended it didn't happen."
"So?"
"People don't smile when they're not alright."
"I do."
"I know. It's annoying. Why do you do it?"
"If I smile people don't ask me if I'm alright." answered then, truthfully since he didn't seem to give up on that question. He looked at me again, his eyes searching my face.
"And what's wrong with people asking that?"
"I don't like it." I replied.
"Well, I don't like you." he said back.
"I think we already established that." I said.
"You're weird." Happy the cat put in, and I looked up.
"Says the blue flying cat. I don't think you can just go off calling others weird."
"HEY, be nice to Happy."
"HE started it."
"Well YOU continued it!"
"Lovers quarrel?" asked the ticket lady, and I noticed we had already entered the train station.
"WE ARE NOT LOVERS!" we said in unison then, and the ticket lady put her hands up and just smiled.
"I don't have money for the train, so I'm walking." I said just as Natsu took his wallet up, and he stiffened, looked at me.
"WHAT did you say?" he asked.
"I'm walking." I repeated. Then, suddenly, his eyes lit up.
"You're WILLING to walk?" he asked, and I nodded. Oh yeah. He DID have that compulsion against any kind of transportation.
"THANK YOU!" he declared, and like that, we headed for the tracks, and I would have several more hours of walking ahead of me, back to Acalypha. Now I only needed to somehow come up with an idea as to where I supposedly lived. Suddenly, shortly after we had started our journey, but after all of us had long since become soaking wet, I started laughing.
"What're you laughing at?" Natsu asked with suspicion in his voice. I just looked at him.
"You're only the second one to ever tell me you disliked me," I said. It was a weird thing to be laughing at, but it was simply hilarious.
"And that is funny HOW?" he asked. I stared at the sky then, the falling rain and the churning clouds.
"You said it as if it was the most normal thing in the world, and spoke out truthfully without even flinching," I said.
"So?" he asked.
"You're brave," I declared then, smiled at him, somewhat truthfully this time around. It was praise, kind of. Then I let the smile fade. Pretending around him had no use anyways. He disliked me. There was no use in trying to stay on his good side.
"I.. on the other hand, I'm a coward." I continued, a sad smile in the corner of my mouth. A coward that wants to run. That wants to hide.
"Sure doesn't seem like it, the way you spoke to that man earlier." he said after a while, and I looked at him.
"What do you mean?" I asked. I had spoken, yes, but words were just mere words, and I had been so scared. So terrified.
"You seemed frightened like hell, but you still stared him straight in the eyes and spoke up to him. Being brave isn't about not being scared. Being brave is about being scared but not running away." he said, looking serious and once more, completely honest. I didn't think the boy was even remotely capable of ever telling a lie.
"You don't seem like a person that gets scared of ANYTHING though," I said back, and a wide grin spread across his face.
"That's because I'm awesome," he said,
"Aye sir!" the cat put in, resting on the head of his partner this time around. I stopped, and so did he. Suddenly I started laughing loudly. The stress of today seemed to be getting to me, and I think I might be having a minor breakdown. He just seemed so proud as he uttered that sentence. It was hilarious.
"You look so sure of yourself, it's.. " I had tears in my eyes, had to stop talking as the laughter took complete hold of my body so I had to clutch my stomach as it cramped up due to the effort. Suddenly the slippery ground decided to betray me, and with a swoosh I fell into the mud, covering myself completely with dirt. Now he started laughing too, pointing at me as the laughter from the both of us echoed through the silent rain. We were alone, in the pouring rain, only accompanied by mud and grass, and of course, Happy the cat. I slipped again as I tried getting up, and Natsu only laughed harder because of it.
"Why you.." I muttered, managed to leap from my position on all fours, successfully bringing the Dragon Slayer to the ground where we both basked around for a bit, swearing and laughing and keeping the other from getting up. What finally made us stop was the sudden silence as the heavens decided to cease its downpour. We sat in the mud, filthy and wet, staring at the sky as the clouds started to break up, giving way for rays from the sun existing somewhere up there.
"I.. don't have a change of clothes..." I admitted after a while of silence, still staring at the sky without looking at the being next to me.
"You can borrow some of mine when we get to Acalypha." he replied. I muttered a thank you and then got up, finally succeeding this time. Then I managed to get my wet self into the railroad-tracks where the mud was less dominating, and when Natsu had done the same we started walking again.
"I still don't like you, you know," he said.
"Shut up." I replied, but a soft smile played in the corner of my mouth. I didn't quite manage to banish it, so I let it be there as we kept walking. Well, the lady would be getting quite the surprise when we got there, all dirty and soaked as we were.
I think.. I think I just made a friend, Mama. Doesn't that make you proud? And I also managed to not run away today. Things sure are changing.
Soon the sun shone down upon us, and Acalypha was in sight.