Jacob's POV

Sitting on the porch talking with Sam and Cris helped. Well, Cris didn't say much at all and was more like a spare part, but as alphas we needed to be on a one to one basis. Understanding was the key.

I felt like an emotional wreck and was fairly pissed off when Jared called me with the message from Sam. I hated being summoned, but it was important we aided each other. Unfortunately, right now I just wanted to be on my own, but instead there was more wolf crap to deal with. I'd been here a few hours now and still couldn't figure these new guys out. I saw that they were like us, but the different animal forms bugged me. For example, the owl - that guy actually got smaller when he phased. What was the point of that? There are also more of them back in Alaska and I couldn't help wonder what they looked like.

Putting that aside, it tickled me that they clearly didn't know about imprinting yet. Cris thought we were just talking about some girlfriends. Well, we'll leave that surprise for later on …

I felt my mind wander back to Nessie. She was fully grown now and beginning to realise what I meant to her, or so I hoped. It was just a shame that Bella had freaked out and suddenly decided to put distance between us. Her reasoning being that she didn't want her little girl to come of age feeling like her choices were set. I just couldn't wrap my head around it though; after all these years of Bella telling that me she didn't trust anyone else with Nessie's heart, she clearly had doubts.

In the end, Edward and I had talked about his irrational wife (not that he would ever call her that) and decided that, for a while, I'd give the family space to move and settle somewhere new.

The problem was that they had already stayed here longer than usual and all because of me and Nessie. As a compromise, it was agreed that I would join them in a year.

The Cullen's figured that with me out of the way it would give my girl some time to reach adulthood and make her own decisions. I admit, whenever we were together it was easy to get lost in our own world. Edward also assured me that our separation would be a short time in comparison to the eternity we would have, but I didn't care. A year may pass fast for a vampire, but not so much for a lonely imprinted wolf.

I was mentally and physically struggling from the distance already. I didn't think I'd make it that long before I broke and went begging for permission to be with her. Failing that, I could always try and steal her away. Nessie wouldn't fight me, but that overprotective bimbo aunt might… See all I can do is dream up stupid schemes!

My only sanity was my other reason for staying here. My pack - well mainly Leah. Seth, Embry and Quil were not such a worry to leave as they at least had things figured out.

The thing was, without the pressure and crowded minds of Sam's lot, we were a surprisingly solid unit. We weren't like the Brady Bunch or anything, but we were stable enough that I'd rather hear Embry's perverted thoughts than Paul's fucked up ones. At least Embry's didn't centre around my sister.

Seth, although I called him 'kid' had grown up. In fact, since the Cullen's left, I spent most my time at his house and actually took up their spare room. It was comforting, but I doubted it was the house and more the company of a certain Clearwater. I reflected back to Seth. It always amazed me that his charm and happy-go-lucky attitude hadn't been tarnished. It was a miracle. Even after he lost his parents and Charlie, the lad lived on with a passion for life. It rivaled any imprint which was probably why he still didn't have one - he didn't need one.

On the other hand, there was Quil, whose love and caring of all things Claire would never cease to dazzle me. He had been changed… (What's the word Bella used to say?) 'irrevocably' and was currently acting like the best brother that girl could have. He was also the only wolf who could really understand what it was like to have an imprint that didn't revolve around reproduction - well at least as I found with Nessie, not until they came of age. Even then, there was still no guarantee they would see us like that, but it was our job to mould ourselves to whatever they wanted.

Good old Embry was still himself. He hadn't imprinted either, but like me he had grown to have a soft spot for Leah. It was just a shame that the whole possibility of imprinting gave you paranoia. Problem being, if you haven't done it, you could hurt anyone you have a relationship with. Embry would never risk trying to date Leah. He couldn't risk hurting her like that, and I wasn't sure he could bare it if Leah did it to him. It was a stupid notion anyway; it wasn't like he'd have a chance with her anyway.

Sorry, that was harsh and I didn't really mean it. Embry was (is) great. Both he and Quil are still my best friends, but I'd kill anyone that hurt that girl again and I made sure he knew it. He just didn't know the full reason why. No one did.

Leah…she had come so far, but she still couldn't shine.

Don't get me wrong, she could still scare the shit out of me and would beat the hell out of us for no reason, but she wasn't always that person and she had scars I worried would never heal.

I used to believe Leah was a dramatic, self-absorbed bitch, wallowing in self pity. To be fair, she hasn't helped herself over the years. However, I now think that between the death of her parents, the pain Sam left, being the only female wolf and a 'genetic dead end' (her words not mine), she never had much of a chance. Most people would have stopped fighting life by now.

Let's face it, seven years ago I was still a teenage boy and was trying to deal with the world myself. If it wasn't for Nessie, losing Bella may have just killed me. I was older now and hopefully more mature, but Leah had all of that to deal with without an imprint to save her. Regardless, she never stopped picking herself up. Whether it was for her parents or baby brother, Leah needed to live. That was when she became the hard faced girl we know, but at least she wasn't empty. Her anger was like a fire which burnt anyone who got too close for comfort, yet still kept her alive inside, and I was glad for that.

A part of me hated Sam for starting it all, but I was a hypocrite. Like him, I'd never be able to leave my imprint for long. I couldn't help it though, every time I saw Emily and her bump I felt sorry for Leah and for what she wished was hers. She was too good for him though. In fact she was too good for any of us.

God, 'Leah', even her name was beautiful. She was so strong and smart! Leah was independent and proud and despised our pity so we did our best to hide it. She herself hid the biggest heart. I think this was the main reason she acted like she did; it was protection. I never doubted it once though. All you had to do was see the way she cared for us (even when angry). She might give us hell, but we all knew she'd die for us without a second thought. Sadly, I don't think she's ever realised we would do the same for her.

I could feel myself smiling. Over the last few years, she'd started to let her guard down and have fun with us. It was then that we realised that she was funny, like really funny! I'd never met a woman who could hold her own like she did. It was just a shame she used her skills to put us in our place. I thought over all of her traits, I couldn't help it. Even after all these years, even when she acted like a bitch and drove me to distraction, she was our bitch and I loved her. If I had ever had a choice outside of imprinting, I would have chosen her and never looked back. Christ even part of Sam still loved her. She drew us in without even knowing.

Now don't go getting me wrong. My love for Nessie was absolute, just as Sam's was for Emily. We belonged to them, but Leah had found her own little place in my heart. Since the Cullen's left, she had even started to relax more and I felt closer to her if possible.

It all went back to the beginning, when she'd left Sam's pack and joined me. We were volatile together. She had only picked me as the lesser of two evils, but over time we started to relate. We both had broken hearts and knew what it was like to be second and forgotten. Gradually we built up a comradery that no one could have predicted. After this, it was an easy decision to make her my beta and I've never regretted it. Leah was loyal and even if she disagreed she would back me up. Despite all her feelings she had still been ready to go down fighting in the 'almost' war. In some respects, she would have given her life to let me and my imprint live happily ever after.

I remember back to the day I imprinted. Even though I was so absorbed in Nessie, I saw the disappointment in Leah's eyes. I knew in her mind I had abandoned her in the darkness. My heart was restored in a beat and I was falling in to the same pre-written destiny she had been left for. A destiny she believed she could never had. Leah thought we had an understanding and so she trusted me. I couldn't believe she had so little faith and just expected me to leave her. It didn't take long to decide that whatever happened with Ness, I would never let Leah fade away into that blackness. Someone needed to prove she could rely on more than her family.

Over the years, I had kept my word and in return I'd seen more of her soul than I thought possible. Her never ending sacrifice was breathtaking. For example, I knew she had come to like the Cullen's in her own way, but only because I asked her to try. In her heart, she struggled daily. She still blamed them for her phasing which in turn killed her father. Plus, Edward's whole mind reading thing really bugged her. She hated anyone in her head - the pack was bad enough. I also knew she only stayed in La Push and tolerated the pain for me and Seth. Without us, she would have probably disappeared and never been seen again.

I inhaled heavily; I missed her. She would have to come back soon seeing as a month had already passed. When Sam announced Emily was pregnant, he managed to top the day he announced their engagement, which was saying something. I could see it was too much for Leah. I made her come to the party only because I knew she didn't like special treatment and people would talk more if she wasn't there.

In the end, I couldn't look at her sorrowful eyes anymore and sent her, no, ordered her, to visit my sister in Hawaii. So far, we'd received one postcard addressed 'To the Leech Pack!' with a simple 'Missing you!' written on the back. That was a week ago.

I was getting anxious and hoped if she missed us as much as I did her she'd be back soon. I needed her; Leah was my beta and my support. As much as she despised my imprint and my immediate acceptance of it years ago, she still stood by my side where she belonged. Leah was there for me repeatedly. She didn't sugar coat anything, but she was my rock. Besides, I needed to talk to her. I was leaving regardless of when and had decided she was going to take over the pack immediately. At least that way I could step back and let her get used to it.

I trusted her not to abuse the power and if it came down to it she had a compassion the others lacked. Besides, the boys respected her despite their half-hearted protests and I hoped taking the lead would give her a purpose. A few people like Paul and Brady had already got wind of my plan and had some shitty views about her stability, but I wasn't bothered. I didn't want anyone perfect running things - a leader shouldn't be like that. A leader should be passionate and aware of their own faults.

My main worry was how her relationship with Sam would affect the alpha link. This was another reason for arranging the Hawaii trip. I hoped she'd come back refreshed and would hear me out.

Finally, I needed to make sure she knew I wasn't abandoning her and that would be a hard conversation.

God, I could write a never ending book on that woman…