Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS, its characters, or its scripts.

:::X:::

5 minutes before Ziva questions Tony…

Tony exited the lab, still grinning widely.

The grin fell from his face when he saw Jenny leaving the elevator. Oh no… Please be headed somewhere else, please!

"Hey, Director! Where are you headed on this beautiful morning?" DiNozzo put on a smile.

"Abby's lab." I have to stall her!

"Abby's not in there."

She was suspicious. "Oh. Where is she? She left her music on."

"The head."

"I'll wait in her lab for her."

"Why not just come back later?"

"This will only take a second, Tony."

"So can't it wait?"

"What's happening in there that you don't want me to know about?"

"What? Nothing. Nothing's happening in there, director."

"Then why do you keep standing in front of me when I try to go around you, Agent DiNozzo?"

"It's a new dance I just made up."

"Tony."

"Director."

"Stay still," she said sternly, then proceeded to walk around him.

"Can I get a raise?" He said, going after her.

"Agent DiNozzo!"

He put his hand on her shoulder. "Director… Just listen to me for a moment. If you go in there, you will have to experience one of the most awkward things that humans are capable of experiencing. And if you know what's happening in there, you would have to take action, because it's your job. But if you don't, then you can just come back later and act like this never happened."

"What's wrong with Abby, Tony?"

"Nothing," he said. "Just…please don't go in there," he finished with as a last resort.

The director was extremely curious, but she understood what Tony meant. She knew from first-hand experience that there were just some things that she was better off having no knowledge of.

"Fine. I'll come back later, then."

"Thank you!"

She got back into the elevator and stared at Tony until the doors closed, all the while wondering what was going on in there.

He nearly dropped to his knees from relief. Even with all of the confusing things happening, he knew one thing for sure.

Gibbs and Abby owed him.

BIG TIME.

That is, if he could keep this a secret.

:::X:::

Present time…

"…And so another crisis was avoided thanks to Anthony DiNozzo." Then Tony noticed her expression. Ziva stood before Tony, mouth open slightly from shock. "I know! It's crazy, right?" He agreed with whatever she was silently saying.

"Tony…I am appalled that you would make up such a story just to satisfy your own boredom!"

"I know! I…Wait, what?"

"What's wrong with you? Why would you start such gossip?" She asked him angrily.

"I'm not making this up!" She walked away from him. "Come on, Ziva! Who would make this up? Who?"

Tony, with his head hung, returned to his desk. He started looking at Gibbs' desk again thinking the same thing he'd been thinking for the last five minutes. I wonder if they did it on his desk, too!
:::X:::

Later, Tony had his head resting on his hand, and he tried to look just as bored as he was before Gibbs left so that Gibbs wouldn't become suspicious.

A few minutes later, Gibbs returned to his desk, as he normally would.

"Hey, Boss," Tony said, mumbling against his hand.

Gibbs nodded at him in acknowledgment as he sat at his desk.

"You were sure gone a while." When Tony said this, Ziva looked up at him curiously.

Gibbs squinted at him from across the room.

Ziva looked back and forth between Gibbs and Tony, occasionally meeting a gaze from Tim, who was becoming concerned with Tony's bravery. Or was it stupidity?

Tony eyed his boss' empty hands. "Forget your coffee?"

"I drank it, DiNozzo."

"Was it a really big cup of coffee?"

"If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were one of my ex-wives, DiNozzo." Gibbs glared at him from across the room. Gibbs was shocked when Tony dared to meet his gaze. "Is there something wrong? Because this isn't the time or place for emotional problems."

He pretended to go back to work. "This isn't the time or place for a lot of things."

Tony's eyes widened when he saw Gibbs coming his way. Oh, why can't I just keep my stupid mouth shut?

Gibbs stood in front of his desk and leaned in closely. Tony pushed his chair back slightly instinctively.

"Get. Back. To. Work."

Tony knew he was lucky that that was all Gibbs had done. He was surprised that he hadn't pulled him behind the stairwell to smack him around. "Yes, boss."

McGee looked at Ziva questioningly. She only shrugged her shoulders.

:::X:::

A few hours later in the cafeteria…

"Hey, Ziva!" Tim called as he went after her.

"Hello, McGee."

"What was that all about, in the bullpen today?" He asked as they both went to purchase their food.

"You mean when Tony was pulling Gibbs' levers this morning?"

"Pushing his buttons, Ziva. And yes, that." They both handed the cashier their money and sat down at a table together.

"Well, seeing as he has not sworn me to secrecy, I suppose I can tell you."

McGee leaned in close.

"Tony made up this story and told me that he had seen Gibbs and Abby having sex in her office."

Tim nearly choked on his sandwich at her bluntness. "Well, *cough, cough*, how did that lead to what happened?"

"I don't know why he went after Gibbs like that. Maybe he was trying to prove something."

They both ate for a few minutes before Tim thought of something to say. "So you don't believe Tony?"

"No," she answered simply.

"Well why not? Is that story really that unbelievable?" When he and Abby had broken up a few years before, Tim was almost convinced that it was because she was in love with Gibbs. But he didn't notice anything change between them, so the idea had just faded.

"It's not the story that I find unbelievable, it's Tony! He gets bored, so he finds a way to entertain himself."

"I think that this needs to be investigated."

"Oh, Tim, you know how I hate to get involved with someone else's business," she smirked.

"What do you mean? It's your job!"

She grinned. "What should we do first?"

:::X:::

Stage 1: Find evidence, ask questions

"Okay. So who do we talk to first, McGee?" Ziva asked him as they got in the elevator after lunch.

"Well, if we expect an answer, we should ask Abby."

"That makes sense," she laughed as she pressed the button for Abby's lab.

"Ooh."

"What?" Tim asked.

"I just thought of something. What if she's not alone in there?" She grimaced.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, what if Gibbs is back for round two?"

"Ew, Ziva! Ugh. Well first we should figure out if there was actually a round one. "

"It was just a thought."

"This is an investigation, Ziva! Let's get our story straight before we think about uncovering any afternoon delight!"

She snorted through her laughter. "You are far too serious, Tim!"

The doors opened and they both made their way into Abby's lab, anticipating something odd to happen. That seems to be the theme today.

She wasn't there, so they both made their way into the ballistics lab.

"McGee," Ziva whispered, "this is exactly how Tony's story began!"

"You mean you think they could be in there right now?"

She nodded.

They got closer to the door and noticed that it was cracked open slightly.

Bump…bump…crack…

"Ziva, we should leave! What were we thinking? We are in over our heads."

"Whether or not we are in over our legs," she said, "there's no quitting now, McGee. We're in too deep, and honestly, I'm not leaving until we have answers!"

"Thanks so much, Tony."

"Hehe, anytime Abbs."

"I can't believe the mess I made."

They heard a zipper.

Ziva's mouth was wide open. Oh my God! she mouthed to McGee with open disgust.

McGee was appalled.

"It could happen to anyone. I'm just surprised that you were able to go this long without noticing what you'd done."

"I haven't been this clumsy for a while."

Let's get the hell out of here! Ziva mouthed urgently to Tim.

Tim nodded vigorously in agreement and ran out of the room with Ziva.
:::X:::

Thanks for all of the reviews, you guys! I'm glad you're liking the story! What did you think of this chapter? What do you think is going to happen next? Reviews make me smile! :)