You're surprised, really, that you don't have as tough of a time as you'd expected with essentially cutting yourself off from your family. You're surprised that when you receive the key to your apartment in the mail, no note attached, a sort of passive aggressive action on your mother's part, that you only feel the smallest sting. But, really, you know. You know that you don't have a reason to have a tough time. Not really. Not when. Not when for twenty-three years, you've been. You've been essentially made to feel like an emotional burden on your mother. You've been made to feel like a thorn in your sister's side. Just because. Because you exist, and because you're not perfect. You might be pretty and blonde, like the rest of them. But, you're imperfect. It doesn't matter to them that everyone is imperfect. It matters that your imperfections can be seen. So. It doesn't hurt you that you're not allowing them to define you anymore. It's a relief almost. You think. And. You're planning your tiny wedding. You're planning the rest of your life with this woman who sees you. And who just. Who thinks you're wonderful and beautiful as you are.

Thanksgiving comes and goes in a flurry. Maribel comes down to spend it with you. And. While Santana goes to spend some time at the station, coordinating her donations, Maribel, she. She just. Makes you cry, because she tells you, if you'd like, she'd be really happy to go look at wedding dresses with you. Santana told her, you're sure, that you were going to find one on your own. But, Maribel, asking you that, offering you even more of a place in her family. It makes you nearly shake. Because to feel love. Love in any form. It's just. It's a lot for you to handle. So you go with her. You go with your very-soon-to-be mother-in-law, because you and Santana, you decided that as soon as the holidays are over, you're doing this right away. You go, and you shop, and, Maribel, she helps you with veils, she does zips and buttons. And. More importantly. She gives you her time, she gets to know you more, and you. You learn things about the woman who brought the love of your life into the world. The woman who gave everything in her to make sure your Santana got to where she is now. The woman whom your almost-wife has nothing but the greatest admiration and respect for. She gives you time, and, when you find the dress, she hugs you and kisses your cheeks, and she just. She makes you feel so at home in her presence.

The third day of the new year. That's when you and Santana decided you'll be married. You're not wasting a second of time when the holiday season ends. And when you went together to get your marriage license just after Thanksgiving, you were thrilled to find that first Tuesday of the year open. You just, you want to be her wife. More than anything you've ever wanted before. You know. You know it doesn't change much in terms of your relationship. But. You get to have her in all the ways. In your heart, in your mind, in the eyes of the law. Santana Lopez. She'll be yours. Forever and for always. And. After you count down to midnight. After you hold her close and kiss her on the pier when the clock strikes. After you take her home and crawl on top of her in bed, reminding her that you belong to each other. After all that. You're just, you're buzzing inside. You. You're almost there. And. You can hardly contain yourself.

It's snowing, when you wake up. Not enough to really cause much trouble, but, Santana. She worries. Her mom is taking the train down from New York, and she worries that she won't make it. She worries that something will go wrong. So you kiss her. You kiss her and try to calm her. But it's your wedding day. And with your own heart pitter-pattering, it's hard to soothe her anxiety. It's hard to do much of anything. Much of anything but wait. And wait you do. You wait at home, while your dresses steam in the bathroom. You wait as you pack them in the car in garment bags with Otis' bow tie. You wait at the train station, when Maribel gets in an hour and a half late, and the snow falls harder. You wait. And you hold hands. And you tuck her head under her chin. In that spot. The spot that was made for her. The spot that will be hers, officially, forever, as soon as her mother gets here to witness your marriage. You wait, and finally, when Maribel steps off the train, her own dress in hand, Santana. She just. She embraces her mom, and she cries. Because that's what she does when she's excited. And you cry too. Because you're getting married. You're getting married in the snow on the third day of the year. And your heart. It's so close to bursting free of your chest. You love her, you love her, and. You're about to marry her. You're about to get this fairy tale ending and this new beginning. One you've never dared to hope for. One that's just. That's everything and more.

Maribel sits in the backseat with Otis, and you can see she and Santana aren't speaking at all. The snow, it's coming down harder. The roads, they're getting bad. And you know, you know. Santana hates that. You know she wishes you'd left the car home. But, you keep your hand on her thigh. You squeeze it. You try to calm her. But there are a lot of nerves everywhere. Not about getting married. Because that, you're both sure of, so sure of. But about all the logistics. About the snow. About the driving. About, just, all the things that even a dozen of your lists can't account for. But soon. Soon all the nerves will stop. Soon, your heart, it'll be fluttering only because it sees all the love in Santana's fire eyes. It will be fluttering, because you'll hold her hands and say your vows. You'll kiss her lips, and. And you'll leave this courthouse. You'll leave as Mrs. Brittany Lopez. And. You suck in all the air you can. Because it overwhelms you. In a good way. In the best way.

Santana parks the car, and you see her scowl a little at how much snow has accumulated in the parking lot. It's a lot, it's nerve-wracking. But also, it's beautiful. So beautiful. And you think, you think, maybe it's the most perfect wedding day you could ever have. It feels like. Maybe it reflects your relationship with your almost-wife so wonderfully. The nerve-wracking part. The beautiful part. The fact that it's not that oft sought out spring wedding type of day. It's different. It's special. And you think. You think. It suits you both. She takes your hand when she gets out of the car, and Maribel and Otis, in his protective little snow boots, flank you. In the snow, you fight the urge to skip. You don't think you ever have before, but— You're getting married. It's your wedding day. To this woman, this woman who just, changed your entire world.

Are you ready for this? Santana, she turns to you as she puts the umbrella up over you both. Her dark hair, her thick lashes, they're covered in snowflakes. And she looks beautiful. The most beautiful you've ever seen her, you think. Though maybe, maybe, you feel that same way each and every time you look at her.

"I'm so ready." A grin, it spreads across your face, and her smile, it's. Crinkle eyes. Dimples. It's for you. All for you. "How about you?"

I think I've been ready for this since the day we went to the beach. She brushes melted snowflakes from your cheeks, and you swoon. You swoon, because it was the first day you knew what that heart thumping was. It was the first day you knew what love meant. It was the first day that you really— That you saw forever in those black fire eyes. You look beautiful, Britt.

"I'm not even in my dress yet." You shrug your shoulders, and she kisses your nose.

I know, but, you're still the most beautiful bride I've ever seen.

"You and your love words." A blush, it creeps to your cheeks, and— "But I don't think it's possible. Because, I'm looking at you, and you're, you're just. I don't know a big enough word."

"Mama." Santana looks down, and you turn to look at Maribel, never dropping Santana's hand.

I told her you both make gorgeous brides. Maribel repeats for you, and your cheeks, they color even brighter. You're stunning, Brittany, both of you.

You go inside, and the four of you, Otis included, you change into your wedding clothes in the City Hall bathroom. You find yourself wondering, really, as Maribel helps you pin your veil. As you catch Santana's eye in the mirror, while she smooths her dress. As you tear up and see her do the same, like you've both sort of been doing all day. You wonder how many weddings this building has seen, since the birth of this whole country. And you wonder, truly, if anyone had ever been as in love as you are with Santana. You wonder, if you're possibly the best match in the entire history of Philadelphia. You wonder, most of all, if anyone has ever been as lucky as you.

Maribel, she slips out, when you're all finished. She slips out, and. And Otis lies down on the floor. And they give you a moment alone. A moment alone. With Santana. Holding your hands. Looking in your eyes. Flames. Flickering. Flames. Making your cheeks burn hotter than they ever have before. Making your whole body burn. Just from the way she looks at you. Just because. Because she really does look at you like— like you're the whole world and universe wrapped up in one human person. She looks at you like you know you look at her, too. Love. Devotion. Undying. Forever. In a singular glance. And you just. You have to kiss her. You think maybe you should wait, until after the wedding. But. Santana told you that she's been lucky since the day she met you. And, you think it's okay. You think it's okay to hold her cheeks and kiss her hard. You think. You think. It's okay to swallow the gasp you feel her let out when you slip your tongue inside her mouth and you just. You taste her and feel your heart as it pounds, pounds, pounds because of the nearness of her, and you just—

"I love you." You pull away, and you look back in her eyes. "I love you, Santana, and I can't wait to marry you."

I love you too. She signs it, too, and she gives you crinkle eyes. The crinkle eyes that you'll get to see for the rest of forever. Let's not wait anymore. It's time. Let's get married, Sweetheart.

Together, you leave the bathroom. Your hands, they're tangled together, and she leans her head a little on you. You love that. You love it so much. When she wants to get herself closer to you. You love it, because your heart beats faster when she's near. And. You love it, because it makes you feel like she trusts you to love and protect her. Maribel, she smiles again when she sees you. You see it in her eyes. How proud she is of her girl, and your heart swells with love for that woman. The woman who's opened her heart and her home to you. The women who gave you Santana. The woman who raised her to be able to love someone like you. To love you hard enough that you left your shell. To love you deep enough that she's made you believe that she wants to spend forever with you. In her hands, she holds two bouquets. And you notice. You notice that the brown bag she'd brought with her from New York is gone. Maribel, she'd brought you white roses and lilies and peonies. Maribel, she's treating this like a true wedding, even though maybe other people wouldn't. Maribel, she understands how important this is to both of you, and, you find yourself tearing up again. Because, you're marrying Santana, and this other woman, her mother, is about to truly become your family forever. And, you just. You couldn't be more grateful for that.

She takes pictures of you as you wait outside for your turn. She loves pictures. And Santana loves pictures. And you understand why. Why they love them, even more than you. The painter. And, you're so caught up in Santana. You're so caught up capturing your own pictures in your head, that you hardly notice the flash. This moment. You've been waiting. All your life, even though you didn't know it. You'd been waiting to meet her. You'd been waiting to love her. You'd been waiting to trust her. And, now. Now this is the last thing. You don't notice the door open behind you, but, Santana, even lost in your eyes, she snaps to attention, and you know. You know they've called your name. You know, the waiting, it's over.

Santana, she walks in first. She holds her mom's arm. And you know, you know they've been waiting, too. You know Maribel, she taught Santana to believe in love stories, even when she didn't have her own. She taught Santana that if she found a person to be with, to cherish them. And she has. She cherishes you in a way that seeps into your bones. She cherishes you, and you cherish her in return. Just a few steps behind, you walk with Otis. You don't have to come in separately, but, you'd talked about it. And even as untraditional as your wedding is, you'd wanted this moment. Even though you've seen each other in your dresses, you still want to catch her eye as you walk to her. And you do. You catch her eye, and. And she's all crinkle smiles and fire eyes and love. So much love that you swear, it might appear as a physical being. It might actually wrap you up and carry you away.

Hey, you. She takes your hands, once you've let Otis sit down on the floor beside Maribel— though he still watches with rapt attention. Once you make it to her, waiting to be your wife.

"Hi, Santana." You squeeze them, and, she smiles bigger. She smiles so much that your heart flows, and you look quickly down at the floor. You look down you make sure your love isn't a physical entity. You look down to make sure it hadn't spilled out through your skin. You look down, and then, you look back up to see her gazing at you. You look back up, and you see the rest of your life flash through the fire in her eyes.

The judge, she begins the ceremony, and, you suck in more air. It's hard to breathe. In a good way. It's hard to breathe. Because this. It's real. It's hard to breathe. Because Santana is beautiful in white. Santana is beautiful always. And she chose you. Of everyone in the world, she chose you. She loves you. And you can't wait to kiss her again. You can't wait to kiss her as your wife.

I, Santana, take thee, Brittany. She goes first. She speaks the most traditional of vows. Vows that you talked about. Vows that. That just. Seem to fit you both. Maybe more than the whole rest of the world. Vows that, in the simplest way, explain what you feel. You're not so good at love words, especially not in front of anyone else. But these. These ones written however many years ago. They've love words that just. Just express the things you want to say. That she wants to say. Even if you didn't make them up yourself. Her hands, they twitch to sign, and you know, she learned them for you. She hadn't told you. You just know. But you give her a tiny shake of the head. You need to keep holding onto her right now. Later, later, you want to see. Not now though. Now you need her to keep you steady. To be my wedded wife, to have and to hold, in love and in friendship. I promise to love and cherish you. For better, for worse. For richer, for poorer. In sickness and in health. As my one true love, for all the days of my life.

"I, Brittany." You need more air. Because. Because. Because. These words. This ceremony. And because she's her. She just. She mouths to you to take your time, it's okay. And you can do it. You can speak the words. In front of the judge. And her mom. And whatever god there is up there, if one exists. Because they're for her, all for her. "Take thee, Santana. To be my wedded wife, to have and to hold, in love and in friendship. I promise to love and cherish you. For better, for worse. For richer, for poorer. In sickness and in health. As my one true love, for all the days of my life."

You have to look at the judge, because. Because she's saying it. And you can't miss it. You can't miss these words. Much as you never want to take your eyes off of Santana. Much as you want to capture her face as she does. But. You'll see it after. You'll see it forever.

By the power vested in me by the state of Pennsylvania, I now pronounce you legally wed. You may kiss your bride.

And kiss her, you do. Kiss her. Like you've never kissed her before, you think. She's your wife. Santana. She's your really, truly, official wife. You're just. You're kissing her, and she's kissing you, and, you feel lightheaded and dizzy. You're smiling as you kiss her. And. And you feel her smiling, too. Because Santana Lopez, the girl who stole your heart. The girl who came and made you believe you were worthy of her love, of all the love, she's your wife. And if you don't keep kissing her. If you don't keep yourself tethered by her to the Earth. You're sure. You're more than sure, that you'll float away somewhere. Out in the great big universe. So you pull her closer by her waist, she wraps her arms around your neck. And the whole word. It's just her. Just her and you.

When you finally pull apart, you're both flushed and wide-eyed, and. Her mom. She's grinning and clapping. And you think Otis is smiling too. Sitting there in his bow tie. Watching you marry this girl he loves too, that he loved, you think, from the first moment you ran into her in the street. This is it. It's all real. And. You're Brittany Lopez. You're grabbing your wife's hand, and she's kissing the inside of your wrist, as the judge, she probably says a few more things, you think. It's a whirlwind, leaving the building, Otis, back at your other side, his leash wrapped around your wrist, and your coats open, still showing your wedding dresses. When Maribel opens the doors for you, the snow, it still falls. But, it's just enough that it makes the whole world seem magical. Not enough that it puts a damper on your day. Not enough that it will stop you from standing in the middle of Broad Street and taking pictures. Because you know, you know. Santana. She's been talking about those pictures for weeks. And you're glad she'll get them.

Mama, take a lot. You see her tell Maribel, once you get situated in the spot, and you slip your coats off, feeling just a little bad that your. Your mother-in-law has to juggle it all. But she smiles. She smiles that same crinkle smile as Santana, and, then you don't feel so bad at all.

She takes pictures of you under the umbrella. Pictures of you kissing. Arms wrapped around each other. Smiles. So many smiles. Because this is your day. She takes pictures of you with the snow falling down upon you. She captures your I love you's, because you just. You can't stop saying them. Neither of you. She captures Otis, coming to you when you call him, and Santana, beaming at you both. You take pictures of her and her mom. That woman, looking at her daughter with such pride. Santana takes them of the two of you, embracing, crying. And then, then some passerby who doesn't care much about the snow. He offers to take one of all four of you, and Maribel, she takes the center, and she wraps an arm around each of your waist. Her girls. Her daughters. Her family. The Lopezes. And. For the first time in as long as you can remember. You truly feel it. You truly feel like you're part of a real family.

You're bubbly, when you get back to the car. You've been bubbly all day, but. You reach over, and, you hold your wife's hand while she navigates the snowy roads. And it's more. Nothing's changed, really, nothing but some legal document. But, it feels like everything has. She's your wife. Your wife. Santana. She is your wife. And she feels it too. When she's at a stoplight. She writes the word on your hand. And you swear, your smile can be seen on another planet.

In the restaurant, the chef himself comes out to congratulate you. And Santana, she offers him champagne. Santana, she wants to toast to your marriage with anyone who will. She loves you. And she's proud. She's so proud that. You just. You melt and you flutter and you float. Your wife. She wants to show you off to the world. And. For the first time. You really feel like you want to let her. It all feels like a dream. Except. Except you know, truly, that it's not one you're waking up from. You know, truly, as she leans over and lifts an oyster to your lips, before she kisses them again, that this is the realest real thing you've ever known.

You leave your wedding celebration, and, the gentle snowfall, it's turned into a storm. The night dark sky, it looks ominous, and Santana, she worries her bottom lip between her teeth. She does that, when she just, can't figure things out in her mind, something rare for her. And you know. You know what it is, and you pull her off to the side, because you want to talk to her privately. You don't want to be rude, but, you know she won't tell you what she's thinking, because it's your wedding night, and—

"Maribel, excuse us for just a minute?" You ask, standing under the restaurant awning, and Maribel, she nods in response. You pull Santana to the side, and, you rub your hands up and down her arms, calming her down. She rarely gets anxious, but, this is bad weather, really bad weather and— "I think we should take a cab home. We'll come back here and pick up the car tomorrow, or when it clears up."

Yeah. I think so, too. I don't feel comfortable driving you guys. But, do you mind if we get my mom to her hotel? I just don't want to stick her in a separate cab and—

"Let's bring her home with us."

Britt, Sweetheart, I can't ask you do that. It's our wedding night, and that's why we got her a hotel room.

"You're not asking. I'm telling you I think it's a good idea, too. Santana, we're going to be married forever. And our family. They're part of that, too. It's not just about you and I. Your mom and Otis, they're part of us. A big important part. And I want her to come be safe in our house." You keep moving your hands over her body, just, touching her.

You're sure about that?

"So sure. It's not like we don't have our own bedroom." You tease a little, and then turn back to serious. "You're worried, and, I'll be worried too, and—" She cuts you off, kissing you. Kissing you hard, and, when she breaks it. You just. You see so much love and gratitude in her eyes that you have to kiss her again.

You, Brittany Lopez, are the best wife in the entire world.

"Say that again." You gasp at her words. Your new name. The way her lips curl up when she says it. The way they stay that way through the word wife. And she says it again. Making your heart race. Making your knees weak. "Wife. You're my wife."

It's the best feeling in the world, right?

"Better than anything."

The snow, it keeps coming down, while Santana calls a cab. While she runs to the car to grab her mom's little suitcase, and she kisses you again, telling you to stay out of the snow. It keeps coming down when the driver arrives, and Maribel takes the front seat, leaving you two to snuggle up together in the back, Santana in the middle seat, and Otis strapped on the passenger side. She leans on you. You play with her hands. She draws love hearts in the lace of your wedding dress. And you just, you love this. Even on the long snowy ride home. You love this so much. You love feeling wrapped in her. You love. With your whole heart. You love it all.

When you get home, you cross the threshold together. You'd thought about scooping Santana up, but. Something about this. It just feels more right. Maribel, she brushes off your offers to entertain her, and she closes herself in the small office where Santana blows up a mattress for her whenever she comes to visit. So it's just you. You and Santana. You and your very new wife. You help each other out of your wedding dresses in the bathroom, and you turn off all the lights. You light candles. Everywhere. All over the bathroom. The bedroom. Because you want to shower together. Your wedding night, it's about so much more than sex. It's about the other types of physical intimacy you share. It's about the emotional intimacy. It's just. All about your love.

It's later, and you're curled in bed with her. Warm pajamas on. Blankets surrounding you. And candles. Still candles. Just on the nightstand now. Because you know neither of you will have the will to get back up. Outside your window, you see the way the snow keeps falling. But. You've showered. She's signed her vows to you. And you cried. Then she cried. Then you pressed kisses all over her body. You'd made love to each other. Sweet. Tender. Drawn out. Because, it's okay. You're alone in your bedroom, and you're married. And. You love your wife. With everything in you. You're tired. She's tired. But, you're not ready for the day to end yet. It all just feels. Too perfect to say goodbye. So you fight. You fight to keep your eyes open. You try so hard not to be lulled into slumber by the way she paints your body with her hands. Like she's still memorizing it, even after all the time you've spent together. In the candlelight, you see her lips. You kiss them, and then you watch them. Because those lips. You think you know them better than any person will ever know another's. You study them, you love them, and, they curl up, in just the faintest smile.

You're thinking hard. Really hard. Are you okay?

"I'm just. I'm perfect. Really. This day was just."

I know. It was. I thought the snow put a damper on our plans, but, you made sure it didn't.

"Well, you're my wife now. So. I wouldn't let it."

Well, thank you for that. You're my favorite thing, you know. My special, wonderful girl.

"And you're mine, too, Santana. Just like the vows said. My one true love."

My favorite person. She smiles. She smiles so much, flickering light in her fire eyes, and. It doesn't matter that it wasn't in those vows. You know it's true for you too. The most true. You hold her close, and. You're happy. So happy. So content. And you are very, very tired, Mrs. Lopez. I can see it in your eyes. My universe, it's about to sleep.

"Don't want today to be over though. It was the best day."

Sleep, sleep, Sweetheart. Today was just the beginning.