AN

Thank you for my reviews! It's amazing to have over 300, but it kind of makes me greedy and now I want more lol. Anyway, here's the next chapter! xx

Leah POV

The next two weeks ended up flying by, and things were (dare I say) looking up for me.

I was finally starting to get a grip on living my life and beginning to see the ways to make the most of the shitty hand I had been dealt.

Cris, of course, was supportive the whole way. In fact, all of my pack (excluding Jake) was being surprisingly helpful and less irritating. It was that, or maybe I was just seeing them properly for the first time in ten years.

I had even noticed how mine and Seth's house had become the central point of the pack too. Embry and Quil were always hanging around, and for once I didn't mind. Both of them seemed to have grown up; sure, they were still capable of being juvenile morons, but they were observant, intelligent, and responsible when they needed to be. I had also forgotten how funny they were and several times they had me doubled over in stitches.

When it came to patrolling, things had improved there too. Cris and I were sharing the duty and working together. As a result, our packs were setting a high standard for Sam's and his cubs; I was obviously smug about this fact.

Of course, before I get too carried away, I must explain that I wasn't a new person. I hadn't seen the light and changed my ways, or anything like that. I would always be Leah, and I would certainly always be a bitch; I was a naturally brash person, but the difference was that I knew I had been hiding behind that one trait and I had to learn to not use it as a defence mechanism.

Before my phasing, I used to be full of love and laughter and I wanted to find that person again. In the meantime though, I was just grateful that the pack was gradually becoming a unit again, and that I could include Jaden and Cris in that as well.

Sadly, I say the pack, but the one person I excluded from this statement was Jake. Since Nessie arrived I hadn't heard from or seen him; I was in no doubt he had been swept up in the imprint love fest. I admit, I was fairly pissed at his behaviour and neglect of the pack, but I constantly reminded myself that he wanted out and this was his way of breaking off from us.

It still sucked though; it was evident the guys missed him and begrudgingly so did I. I missed his laugh and dumb comments, I missed his big feet leaving muddy front prints through my house and I missed shouting at him. Whatever else had happened, he was my best friend first and foremost.

I refused to go to the Cullen's house though. I didn't want my head analysed by Edward, or to play nice with Bella, and I was pretty sure Nessie's enthusiasm for life might also make me vomit. For this reason, I left it to the guys to see him in their own time, standing my ground that he could always come and see me.

It was hard though; I seemed to spend a lot of time avoiding conversations about Jake and Nessie 'the latest happy imprint couple', but still, I was at least managing myself well. I was covering all the alpha duties now, and putting all my focus into leadership and job hunting. It was a bit complicated without the alpha link, but we still managed to organise things between us and I treated Sam with indifference until Jared stepped up.

About a week after the Barrow guys moved in, Cris and I even finally talked about Nessie being back. It felt good to get it all off my chest, and as always Cris was totally logical and patient. He understood that Jake had complicated things for me and pointed out that the space he was giving me might not be a bad thing; I had to agree it helped.

I knew things were getting better for sure, when to my delight, Quil started bringing Claire round again. As there had been no further incidents, he figured she would be safe at mine with a house full of shape shifters, and it made my day to see her.

There was now something else that was bothering me now though:

Even though I was dealing with my Jake issues, I was also enjoying the times it was just me and Cris a little too much for my liking.

I could feel myself getting closer to him every day. I had known him for just one month, but the amount of time we spent together made it feel like years.

We weren't in each other's pockets, but whenever we were both home, I found myself comfortably in his company. He filled the Jake-hole and added his own calming spark to everything.

I was starting to worry about my feelings for him because of this.

He was completely different to Jake, but I didn't want to complicate yet another friendship. Everything had been non-stop drama for years, and I wasn't sure I even wanted to find love anymore - love equalled hurt.

I thought back to the night when I first considered Cris in a different light:

We were in the lounge alone and watching a movie after 'grounding' Seth and Jaden.

Cris had cooked a meal to start with, and rather than a TV dinner as I would normally have alone, he set the table and we sat at it and talked. It wasn't romantic, there were no candles, or music, or anything like that. It was just a calm, civilised, grown-up meal. Sure we had second helpings, but it wasn't the normal rushed affair like it was with the boys.

To my amusement he finished the meal off with coffee and biscuits and then produced a huge tub of cookie dough and a movie. Coffee and ice cream had become our own little joke.

Everything was perfect, until Jaden and Seth came in like a whirlwind and started hunting for leftovers. I couldn't help it - I roared with laughter as Cris shouted at them for their bad manners. I then slapped Seth round the head for drinking out of a milk carton and Cris started laughing too. Within seconds we were both yelling at them like substitute parents and told them playfully to go their rooms. Surprisingly, they went and gave me and Cris the lounge for the evening.

It was while we were watching the movie on the sofa that I realised exactly how lovely and simple the evening had been, and how well Cris fitted into my life. It lead on to me imagining what it would be like to curl up in his large toned arms. I didn't actually have the bottle to move nearer to him though; I knew we were friends and that was all.

Since I could remember, Cris had been sure to set a lot of unsaid boundaries. Little things, like the fact that me and him would play fight, but it never went far. There would be a few jabs, but there was always distance between us and he refused to play rough.

It was something that disappointed me; I loved play fighting and would wrestle with the guys often. It was a pack bonding thing and I kicked ass. His refusal to play properly was frustrating.

There were other things too. He didn't hug me like Seth did, he wouldn't hit me like Quil did and he was always modest around me, unlike Embry. Even Jaden and me had little scuffs around the house. Cris however, was respectful and made it clear he wasn't a touchy feely person. Anytime I got too close, he moved away. I knew he was doing it because I was skilled in the same area, but I hadn't always been that way.

In the end, I had settled for watching Cris that evening rather than the film and studying his face, and I couldn't for the life of me, figure out when I had failed to notice how attractive he was.

Sure, the wolf in him automatically gave him the body of Adonis, but it was his face that had held my interest.

I had never realised how his copper skin was a slightly different shade to mine, or how strong and defined his jaw actually was. Everything about him was beautifully chiselled, even his nose, and he had the cutest dimples. His short black hair was still scruffy, although a little longer than when we first met, but it suited him that way, just like the constant dark shadow of stubble around his chin.

It didn't take long for me to become entranced in admiration. Especially when I began to watch his deep blue eyes and memorise the shape of his nose and full lips. I had even shamefully studied his eyebrows, but became embarrassed when I realised they were raised unnaturally . . .

"Is there something on my face?" Cris had asked with a small smile in the corner of his mouth without looking at me.

I had of course stopped staring immediately and mumbled "No" while feeling incredibly embarrassed and resembling a beetroot.

Cris then returned to watching the film, but the silence was killing me. I started to wish the ground would open up and swallow me to save me from being caught drooling, but I wasn't so lucky.

After a further ten minutes, I reached my limit and needed to relieve the tension in the room. I didn't even think about what I was going to do, and to my own surprise, picked up my spoon, scooped a huge chunk of ice cream out of the tub and flung it at Cris's face.

I know! I know! Not the most mature or Leah like thing to do! What can I say though - maybe the boys' immaturity had finally rubbed off on me?

Regardless of my crazy reasoning, I couldn't have aimed better if I tried; the ice cream landed perfectly in the middle of his face.

Of course, Cris had frozen automatically in shock, but after a few seconds, he wiped the ice cream off his face, and gathering what hadn't already melted off his hot skin, growled and started to move up the sofa towards me.

In response I automatically jumped up squealing (like a girl, I'm ashamed to admit) and ran for it. I was faster so there was no way he was going to catch me, and I was heading for the back door. Unfortunately, I was so busy laughing and looking back at him stalking me through the house, that I didn't notice the closed door. With my speed and strength working against me, I ran smack into it and instantly found myself flat on my back on the floor. Cris was leaning over me wetting himself with laughter.

"Are you ok?" He was looking at me with a new expression. He was smiling, but there was something else in his eyes - a glint maybe?

"I'm fine." I chuckled and felt myself getting caught in his gaze.

"Good!"

The next thing I knew, the ice cream in his hand was smeared over my face and he was laughing even harder as he walked off to get cleaned up . . . .

I had thought about how nice that night was many times since, but I tried to dismiss it. I had bigger worries - I still couldn't get a job and things were getting dire.

Then something happened that was the catalyst of change, and it all started off with an unexpected phone call:

It was early evening when the phone rang. A British woman was on the end of the line asking for Ms. Clearwater. As soon as I confirmed it was me, she immediately started talking about my sample.

I didn't understand what she was going on about, but without sounding like a complete fool I had to play along. Eventually, I got more information out of her. She told me that the sample I sent was perfect and she wanted to know how much more I could supply and how soon.

The woman was so excited, that I barely had a chance to answer anything. I gathered that she intended to sell something of mine on a commission basis. It was when she stated that she specialised in finding fresh new talent and said the words 'art gallery' that I fully comprehended what she was talking about.

I took her number down and said I would call her back tomorrow. I had to get off the phone before I phased; I was livid. Obviously, someone else had sent a picture in, and I knew exactly who it was!

I found the git sitting on the porch with Seth and Jaden.

"How dare you! That was personal stuff!" I bellowed.

Cris's face dropped as he realised what I meant and Seth immediately got up and dragged Jaden inside. My brother knew to get out of the way.

Cris meanwhile stood up and walked over to me, "I don't care!"

"What? That's not an answer!"

I was going to kill him; he was the only person who knew where to find a piece of my artwork meant for submission, but I was so lost for words by the audacity of his bluntness that I paused.

"I said, I don't care Leah! Your art is good and people should see it. I know you need an income and I thought if it worked out, it might help you." Cris had the nerve to be smug.

"Which limb do you want me to start with?" I growled.

"Cut it out Leah. I wanted to do something for you. Be angry if you want, but it's my way of trying to say thanks." Cris's face fell as he spoke.

My anger dispersed slightly. "Thanks for what?" No one ever thanked me.

"For a clever woman, you can be quite dense." He shook his head as he spoke. "Look Leah, it's a thanks for everything. You've helped me a lot, even if you don't know it. I wanted to do something for you before we left." Cris lightly patted my arm this time - again, minimal contact on his part.

"When?" I managed to stutter, surprised by the turn the conversation had taken.

"Tomorrow. I was going to tell you at dinner. It's short notice I know, but I didn't want to say goodbye and then linger here. It's too hard; La Push, among other things, has grown on me." He smiled sweetly.

I felt my usual pang, but it surprised me that it was caused by Cris. I knew he would have to go home soon. No more appearances had been made by the mystery vamp and he had his own life and family. It still hurt to think about losing him though. I went from relying on one alpha to another.

The realisation of what he had done for me started to sink in. No one had ever done something like that before, even Sam didn't have that kind of initiative. I badly wanted to hug him in gratitude, but I didn't know how to approach it. Now that he was leaving, the world felt distorted and I was uncertain.

I hesitantly held my arms out gesturing a hug; the movement felt alien to me after all my years of avoiding such things, but Cris was different. To my surprise and delight he smiled nervously and stepped forward so that I could wrap my arms around his torso. My head ended up lying over his heart and I could hear the strong steady beat. He cautiously put his arms around me in return. I couldn't blame him; I was ready to tear him apart one minute ago.

After a minute he relaxed and so did I. The pang reduced to a dull throb as I took in his scent. It might sound silly, but our noses our so sensitive that different smells effect us. I really think it's a wolf thing, because Cris rested his nose on the top of my head and smelled my hair at the same time.

After a few minutes I finally spoke, "Thank you too Cris. I don't know how things would have turned out if you weren't here."

He kissed the top of my head lightly and I couldn't help but look up. It was a natural action, but he had never done anything like it before. Those blue eyes caught me again and without even thinking I stood on the tips of my toes to kiss him.

My lips brushed his lightly, but as they did he pulled away and whispered in my ear; "Leah, don't. You said you wanted a friend; I can't be that if you're kissing me. This isn't what you need, or really want."

I had a flash back of getting the same reaction from Jake at the house party weeks ago. Everyone thought they knew me better than I knew myself. What right did Cris have to say he knew what I wanted - I couldn't even figure it out for myself?

I pushed him away violently and hurt I walked down the steps; I needed air and his rejection stung. It was like opening up an already raw part of my chest; it was proof again that I was unwanted.

I heard the front door open and close and turned to see that Cris had gone inside. He didn't even stick around to fight or stop me leaving. With my head hung low, I started walking away from the house. My eyes caught movement ahead though and I was surprised when I saw Jake storming up the road. He was heading away from my house at a hell of a speed.

I ran after him shouting his name, but he ignored me and only ploughed forward faster.